Rensselaer Republican, Volume 28, Number 10, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 November 1895 — JETHRO’S STOVE POLISH. [ARTICLE]

JETHRO’S STOVE POLISH.

.J The drowsy sun of an August afternoonshone upon hill and valley, tinging the long swaths of cradled oats on the hillside with a bright yellow, gleaming brightly from the slender leaves of the maturing corn and resting on the long, dusty road with a somewhat dreamy glow that seemed to invite repose Tn the shade. On the porch of the country store at the “Center” sat two old and-gray-bearded men. Around a bend in the road beyond a third old and gray-beard-ed man had just come into sight. “He’s a-comin’,” said Isaac. “So he is,” said Uriah. The two old men turned in their chairs to watch the other's approach. As he drew near they could see that he carried some round and shining object In his ]iand and that his fa/e and clothes were streaked with The newcomer stopped before them, his face beaming with smiles, and with an air of conscious pride field out for their inspection what proved to be a highly polished stove lid. “There she is!” he cried. “The prettiest and cheapest stove poljsh ever Invented. I know'd the minnit I’d put, that taller and vinegar in the last ba.teh that I’d got it.” > “Thunder!” exclaimed Uriah in admiring wonder. “It does look nice,” said Isaac, blinking from one to the other. “Nice!” echoed Jethro, the inventor, Bcornfully. “Why, it beats anything of tlie kind I ever see. Just you try these stove polishes you git out of the stores and you’ll see the difference. Why, this one shines brighter, polishes easier; there hain’t no dust about it, and won’t wear off for six months. Nice? Uniph!”

“Now, Jet," said Uriah, taking an extra chew of fine-cut and leaning back In his chair, “as you're the one that has got this thing up, what's your idea of getting it out?'’ How has it got to be made and “Well,'’ said Jet, squaring himself back, “my idea is just to take some of the stuff and go out and sell it.’’ “Why, yes, of course,” returned Uriah slowly, as if the idea had not occurred to him before. “But what's it going to cost?” Jet sat down on the porch and “got down to business” in a way to excite the admiration of his listeners. ( “I’ve figgered the whole thing out and it just amounts to this: It will cost just 1 cent a cake to make the stove polish. We sell It for -10 cents. That gives us a profit of $12.96 a gross. Now, each one of us ought to sell a gross every day, mehbe more, but we’ll put It at one gross, to be on the safe side. Now, say our expenses are $3 a day. That leaves us $lO a day profit, all but 4 bents, and that beats farming all hollow.” “Jet, old boy, we’re with you'” cried Uriah, slapping the other on the back. “What's the first thing to be done?” ■ "Well, the first thing is to order some stuff to make up into polish, and I thought I’d order about SSO worth. Then we must have some printing done." sk “Well, I'm going to the Forks tomorrow, and I'll see to that," said Uriah. “Then we must get some place to make it," continued Jet. “If my wagon shed was cleaned out It would do first rate,” said Isaac. “I'll attend to that.” “That’s the ticket," cried Jet, enthusiastically. “I tell you, gentlemen, we’ co bound to make something out of this. Just to think, $lO a day Is nearly S3OO a month more money than we take tn now in a year.” “That's so,” said Isaac, rising slowly to his feet “Well, It’s getting along; I’ll have to get back and do chores.**

The other two watched him out of alght “Fine fellow, Ike,” said Uriah. “First rate,” anawered Jet. “A little slow, though, sometimes,” con tinned Uriah. — ~ - “Hardly the man for this kind of business?” “Well, I don’t know. Ike's a good fellow.” “Good fellow? Why, of course he Is. Nobody thinks more of Ike than I do. “Now, I tell you, Jet,” continued Uriah, hitching his chair up to the othOr, “between you and me and that lumber wagon, Ike is the wrong man for this business. You wsnt a man that can git up and git and ain’t afraid to hustle, and Ike will never fill the bill; you mark my words.” “Wert," said Jet, slowly, “I reckon I never give it thought whether he would or hot So you think he won’t do?" —■— “Do? Of course he won’t do. I tell you, Jet, just what's common sense for you’n me—we'll make up the polish and start out together and let Ike sell what -he—can around here; that’ll let him down kind o’ easyr but we'll take the big business, for there ain't anybody but us can handle It.” Jet rose to bls feet “I’ll think the thing over,” he said. “Of course, If Ike won’t do we’ll have to drop him.” Jet walked slowly homeward, rubbing his fingers caressingly over the stove lid and shaking his head in accompaniment to his thoughts. As he turned the bend in the road he discovered Isaac sitting on the bank ahead of him. “I knew you'd be along pretty soon,” said Isaac, rising awkwardly,, “and I thought I’d wait for you. No chance to talk business when Uriah is around. A good fellow, too, first rate; only he blows too much.” ) “Blows quite a bit, that's a< fact,” assented Jet. I “Well, you know what be Is andwhat his folks were before him as welT?rs-~L do, and you know just as well that he’s no man for this business. You see what you want is a man that has some dignity about him and knows how to approach the right sort of way. Now, Uriah don't know what dig-: nity is. Why, he'd go into a man's parlor just the same as he'd go into a cow stable. Well, sir, that may do around here, but It won’t do in the big towns, and that's where you'll make your money. Mighty good thing you've got, Jet; mighty good, but be careful and don’t throw It away on a man like Uriah. I don’t pretend to be no great shucks myself, but if I can’t sell more in a day than he can in a whole week I’ll eaf the samples. But then, if you think I won’t do, just say so, and I’ll dfop out at once.” *Oh, I ain’t afraid hut what vou’ll - .... . T—, . _ *■ l J dd all right,” answered Jet, anxious to conciliate. “But I allow I hev got my doubts of Uriah.” “Qf course you have; you're a man of senss and couldn’t help but have doubts. I’llJpave to cut across here, but think thejmatter over,-Jet; think it over.” “I’ll do that,’* answered Jet, emphatically, as he started on alone again. He walked on rapidly until he came to,an old barn along the road. The roof of the tbarn had besn blown off and nev^r-replaced, and the whole thing looked very; dilapidated but very familiar to Jet, for it was his barn. He noticed the hole in the rbof and made a menial voty that Some of his profits should go to repairing it. Beyond the barn was a little tumble-dojvn’house and the yard between was filled with remnants of lumber wagons, hay rake, reaper, buckboard and several odds and ends of old buildings. A tall, thin and melancholy looking woman was bending over a washtub at the pump. She straightened and stopped her work as Jet came up. He went on into the house and put the stove lid he had been carrying on the stove. Then he came out and sat down near his wife..

“They say there's $lO a day in it for a sure thing; that's what they say.’’ “Well, I'm glad If there-is,” said the woman, sighing softly. “The Lord knows we need it. Is Uriah and Ike X°in’ to take hold of it with you?” “Mebbe they are ajid mebbe they ain-’t. Know them fellers better than to trust either of them, I know what they’d like-Mhey'll shinpy up to me and lot on they hate each ether like pistn till they find out how to Stake the polish, and then you’d see them together again thicker’n hops, and I’d be left. Not if I know It. I can make $2,000 a year out of and go it alone." • “Can’t you get me that wrapper tonight, then; it’s only 70 cents?” “Only 70 cents? Confound it, don't you know that it will take every cent I can rake and scrape to get the thing started? I'd rather get you a dozen silk dresses two weeks from no »■ than spare a cent to-night.” “1 don’t see,” she began when there was a yell from the kitchftn, followed by the loud voice of a .man—- " Phew Judas! What the devil’s up here, anyway? Are you trying to burn the house down?”

Jet made a jump to the door and stopped aghast. The stove lid, so highly polished but a moment befortj, was now a dull, dirty red, while above it curled a thick, dingy smoke, bearing with It an odor strong enough to knock down a horse. • e “Is that the way your polish works. Jet?” asked a young man coming around the house holding his nose. Jet gave a snort of disgust “I suppose you’ll have to blab It all over town,” he growled, and turning away sulkily, went to the barn. “What do you think of it?” asked the young man of the woman. “I think it’s a good thing I saved eggs enough to get that wrapper,” returned the woman, as she tried to bl aw the smoke out of the house with her apron. —Philadelphia Times.