Rensselaer Republican, Volume 28, Number 7, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 October 1895 — TARANTULA GULCH. [ARTICLE]

TARANTULA GULCH.

Honest John Cooler, of Walnut Creek, Yavapai County, told me a story of how Bb Jones discovered Tarantula gulch. It ia so startling that it may seem Improbable, but Honest John stands behind it and two six-shooters hang on to him. Address him at Walnut Creek for terms. “Me and Eb Jones was pards way back in ’7G. Eb wjisn’t much on coze, but he had more grit and git up and git than any pard I ever had. More’n that, he had twice the heft of him In lock. His luck was simply tremendous. We was prospectin’ together on a purty fair - layont-On-Xhe. upper Llassa vnmpa, when the grub petered out. We elected Bb to make a forage on the next station and he humped himself accordin'. “The afternoon was so hot you cud . fry beans on the bare sile in the shade and when he reached the crik the sight of the water overcome him. He shed his butes and pants and lay where the water cud tickle along his spinal column, and he was dreaming of his childhood days when he saw them pants going over the bank with two kyotes tied to ’em. He gets up smart and puts on his butes and made after them kyotes cussln’ flit to make it rain. The kyotes was onto him and put on steam, and If the durned critters had only come to some understandin' on them pants he never cud have overhauled ’em, but each of ’em had a leg of pants in his Jaw and they cudn’t swap opinions without letting out the pants. “Just as Eb was concluding to make camp for a new outfit them kyotes come to a tree and each on ’em took other side of it; consequently the pants held ’em till Eb got on deck. “If the critters had had sense enongh to pull back or to let go they might have got away, but they both wanted all the pants on their side. Then they got the idea that the tree was in the game for the pot, and they slewed •round and tried to pull up the tree and take it along with ’em But the tree held on. “Eb come up aud shook in his boots to see the fun and the kyotes was so set on getting the tree that they didn’t take no notice of him, and he laffed and laffed so that he had to let his belt out “Eb he figgers up about what he’ll do, and takin’ a piece of rope out of his pocket he took their tails, which was stiff as crowbars with rage, an’ tied ’em fast together. “When they realized what was up them kyotes give A yowl so sharp It cut a limb off the tree, and they started off so sudden that the punts fell outen their jaws aud tlieir backs went up so high that they had to roll over to straighten ’em. Then they tried to go off In different directions, but they was Jlned for keeps. Then they swung round the tree and compared notes. They must have Towed that the game was purty rich. Eb was squatting on the ground just where he’d joined the critters, lafliu’ fit to bust, when fill to onst he was swung up off the ground and carried along on 2:40 time. It nearly choked him at first and he didn’t know what to make of it Then he realized that them kyotes had turned back together and was riding him on their tails. Eh had got a grip without thinking Just as they struck him. Barrln’ some rough ground, he got along fine. “It was kinder dark when they started and purty black when they got there. Bb got there first. The kyotes was so scalrt that they didn't keep a good lookout, aud when they come to an Indian tank they didn't see it until they wen right on top of it: then they turned sadden in different directions and Kb •lid off and rolled down about twenty feet before he stopped. When be •topped he stopped all over. . “He sat up when he cud and laffed So much that lie had to loosen his beit again and take off his butes. it was the most a mooning tiling he'd struck •luce the circus come to ITosoolL "Then he flggered he'd better be gittln’ somewhar mighty quick. It was ao dark he cudn’t have seen daylight Without a candle, au’ he wandered •boat promlskus. “About midnight he hadn't got no bearings and concluded to camp soy the Bight Just as he'd done this he bod • snort like a frog with the nightman. Bb thought it was Injuns. Tbs enjy Weapon he had was a jackknife la his back pocket, but he was dead game. Be rolled himself to the edge of the bank and peered down, but cudnt aee ■matin’. Then the bank bust and Bb lighted on top of somethin' soft “It was mud! He’d got back to the Indian tank. Ho was riled enough to

chaw torri. bet It wan ao use kicking, so he atraggied up and got onto country reck again as qulqk as he cud, and candadcd he’d have no more amoosements «Osunop,” Honest John called for another drink just tbev aad I ventured to ask him bow Eh got back his pants, but he choked me off rather roughly “Whole Halifax is telling this story—you me ntl Didn't yon ever hear of dog’s pants? Then what's the matter with kyetes having pants, and only cm atvrees two of ’em? This yarn ain’t about pants anvhow: it’s about Eb Jones discovering Tarantula gulch, and that's where I’m aheading Them other things Is ex try?” Then John continued: “When Eb woke up next morning he tbongbt he was petrified He was so heavy be cuda’t lift hisself. The clay had bh onto him. “After a while he got a boost to himself and railed over; then he drew hisself up a hank for more’n two hours until he was kinder perpendikler, Dggcring to faQ hack and break hisself up! *Tt was a risky thing to throw hisself down, as he end us lief as not break his beck as well as the mud, but he was desprate and hadn’t no time to lose. P’raps if he’d thought rael hard on the snbjec' he ajlght’ve started a crack somewhere—probly in his head. “He swung hisself a little so’s to fall eves—and then let go! “He kinder rattled Inside as he touched the bottom, and was hopeful of gettia’ out; more so as he felt thar wus some seams opened long the front. He WTBBtied hard to open up, and after s while the sweat kinder moistens the day long his back and he wus able to step out like a clam from its shell. “After he'd shook hisself some, ho closed up the mud casing so that it looked, for ail creation, like a petrified human. It vrns so nat;. rally shaped that Bb felt as he onghter give it a decent plantin' for fete own sake. So he scraped oat a hole and puts it into.it, and he tekeo a smooth rock for a tomb--atome aad-wrft-OB It as foilers..gee whiz, as the Sawyers say: Wf&fa this shell of clay Dwelt Bbineser Jones! But Jones is gone away To kiader rest bis bones. “Several years after some tenderfoot uncovered that corpse and wanted to lost St ©Ter the country as a petrified Hassyampan, but when Eb knew on it be stopped their foolin'. It looked so like hisself, eves to the creases in his pants, that It seemed that they wus try in' to tote himself. He got it away from ’em, and sold it east for SSOO. “After he’d got out of his shell he kinder rested. The sun wus hot an’, he wondered what in Halifax kept his bead so cool He put his hand up and took a jump of about twenty feet, for his hair wns gone—every timber of it—an’ If a bold yet! The domed mud had friz to It an’ h had come out without bis knowing. He was some troubled about losing his hair, but it wasn't his style to ay over burnt beans, and then be figgz&ed tbat he'd save somethin’ on baircimla'an' other things. When he’d gotpver beta’ bald he took a survey of the location, an’ found that he was in a narrow gulch about half a mile long an 1 ; more or less broad. What struck Jdtt most wus some beautiful croppins, the pnrliest fee ever seen, an’ he ealkerlated to sample ’em before he struck the river an’ got hearings for somewhere*. Jest as be got movin' he hearn a whirr an’ a spat like ns if a mountain lyin wiw around, an’ he dumb up a boulder an’ waited fer the lyin. “It was a lyin, sure enough, about the size of a beifer or rayther larger. It whs hJgger'n a elephant, Eb says, but Eb whs down below Wickeberg a spell, an’ it spiled his morals. “The lyin he crouched just below the rock, with bis eyes fixed on Eh tryin’ to ebontse bim.” . ■ “Hypnotize him, you menu.” “Yes. that’s IL Well, the hipotomlsin’ didn't work worth a cent, so he stood up an’ swung bis tail till he’d got a good ready on, an' then be pulled the trigger. Eb saw him com in and stuck his toes Into the rock an’ hung head down till the cyclone passed. The lyin he swished his tail agen swishcr Ilian ever, an’ it struck age® a rock, an’ he got mad at the rock an’ tried to claw it to pieces, but It wasn't pullin' stakes for no lyin! “Then be flggered to take a flier at Eb agen, who was siltin' up laffln’ at the trick he’d played him, but he dove down agea pnrty suddiut when the cyclone come back. “This racket continued half an hour or less—Eb says six hours—an’ his toes 1 was about glvln' out, when he got a new deal.

“Jest as the erfttor was goin' to make another spring a tarantula about two feet high come out to sun hisself, an’ tfee lyin'* toil enngbt him right in the Jaw before fee end put up his hands.” “A tarantula two feet high?" “Well, It’s jes’ as easy to call it six, en* I remember seein’ one six feet high.” “For tfee Lord's sake! When?" “On a shelf. But to eontiner. “The tarantula was so mad he didn’t speak, but fee laid hisself out to get even. and he bit on to that tail so’s he conlda't fee shook off. and p’raps he cudn’t let go bis grip nohow. “Now, the lyin had been Jumpin’ so freqarat ©rer Eb’s rock that,it had become second lmter to him, and be cudn’t keep from doin’ it if he tried, so he jes’ con tin ae red to spying hackards and forards witfeoet thinkin’. while the tarantula bit and bit till the pison begun to work and the lyin begun to swell. “Eb fee Jes’ got off his i«*rch and laid oa tfee ground, kickin’ np his heels and •booths’, tin fee eadn’t do so no more. “Au' tfee lyin kep’ a swellin' an’ a ■wellin' till It was as big as a house, and finefly tt awoß a© much that It got light •Beach to float off in the air clear outer sight, with tfee tarantula still haugin’ “John.” 1 observed, “that ‘lyin’ was n

.. "It was that, my friend! If it hadn’t been for the lyln the yarn wudn’t have been interestin’, wud it?” “Well, about Tarantula gulch; have you come to it vet?” “I’m right there! “When Eb got so’s he cud walk straight he looked at them eropptn’s and found them so good that he put back to camp without stoppiu’ for any amoosements, and we made a location there that was the corner stone of Tarantula gulch. And I’ve told you now T how Eb Jones come to discover It. “Some other time I may tell you-njore about it, but jes’ now I’m tired.” “I believe you arc,” said I —Los Angeles Id.