Rensselaer Republican, Volume 28, Number 5, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 3 October 1895 — STORY TELLER [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

STORY TELLER

: < ( T —v ID you ever give a man the j J wrong medicine, Dr. Macs. *' pherson ?" t MaephersOu shook his head. “I do not remember doing so. But I ■ once gave a man an Overdose of a drug . :for a sleeping draught, which nearly killed him. It was his own fault, though, as you will see when I tell you the story. It was whenlwau-qulteJA young man, and scon after I started a practice of my own at Chelsea. I had ' taken a pretty large house there, as a .* doctor is bound to do if he wants to get on, and kept a couple of servants. On the night, however, when my adventure happened, both the girls were i! away. So that when a violent ring came at the front door bell about midnight when I was iust thinking of turning in, I had to go and answer It myself. When I opened the door I ■ found that it was as I expected. A small boy, breathless with running, Informed me that I was required at ' once*at an address he gave me in a ■ street about half an hour’s walk from my house. a- < “ ‘What am I wanted for?’ I asked, but the boy could not tell me. He had been passing the house, he said, when 7 an old gentleman opened the door, gave o|ilm apalf crown, and told him to run as hard as he could for the nearest * doctor. “I put on my overcoat and started, carrying .with me a few things on the ' chance that they might be necessary, ’ Including a strong soporific which I —inight have to use*if I found my patient G in great pain which I could not immediately relieve. “I had concluded that my services were made necessarj-by some accident; iaißia nwd as therefore, in getting ,to the address which the boy had given me. As I * approached the house I was surprised ...could not help wondering whether t " bad been made (lie victim of a practical Jobe. I was prepare'with an apology , for my intrusion when I hoard steps descending the staiiA and coining alon£ I the hall sh answer to my second ring;. .The door was opened f>y a genial-look-j'jng old gentleman iu aflowqred dress'Tßji gown, who carried’ a lamp in hi A hand, and wlioSe first words set toy mind at rest as far as my fears of a hoax were concerned, ri “ *Oh! you a'ret the 'doctor, 1 suppose?’ he said. ‘Wiiij you walk np- , stairs, please?’ ; ~ “He was chatting all tlie while that * he preceded Aie rip l the broad- staircase -U* a voice that cerfiainiy did not sbdw' any anxiety. As he led the way into ' a room on tlie first floor at the back and placed the lriirip' on the table. 1 I glanced, around the place -qriiekljh ex*peCtlh’g*to see some sign of the person I had come to attend.'’ - “The rotfeu was comfortably? almost j furnished as a sitting--room and contained a cheerful-looking* ' fire, before which “two armchairs were. A drawn up, with a small table between . . them, containing two glasses, a bottle of whisky and a siphon of soda water, besides a cigars.’' But tiiere was no sign of a parent. “ ‘Take your great coat off jyjd sjt down,’ said nhJ .old can put i suppose you will TSt object- to' a glass of Scotch and A-eheroot ? P can recommend the cheroots.' ~ * “He had seated himself in one of the * armchairs as he spoke and was filling the glasses. “ ‘Pardon mb,' ! said,' in considerable .I astonishment, ‘hut had 1 not4>etfer see, the patient before I do .anything else?’ “He looked Up, as if sin-prised at my & suggestion. 1 ‘“Oh, I am the patient,’ he said, placidly. ~ r - . j ‘ * ' *1 started Jn greater surprise than II ever, for he looked quite a 1 picture of- ‘' hbaltb, and be smiled good-naturedly._ -v Ji “ ‘if you will alt driwn i will tell you -•< what is the mat ten- with tne,’ he said' as placidly os before,:: ‘I do not like to> see * man standing while I am sitting,and If yqu do not take your coat off yofui will catch cold when you go out again. Vou doctors never use your knowledge? to take care ofl : yoarselvb3. That is j ..bptterVof I obeyed wfluderinglyff i.,„ “T am a victim pf hasampia.’ be wens after I had taken the mttwr firm, chair; ‘I suffer.', terribly., vbp’jqannot; ‘,“Sn what it Is to, stay atrgke all night u 'oi4r while, the Vest .of ibitWffla' Id J ttiletep.- Not a sori!'to4pirtik,'tk. ot l v living person in a city of 'I tihlnk »v/tbft it vflll Seßd me rited some difly.’ i fl) ‘“Yes, it IsagreAi -scflMctton,! I said, shortly, not a little chagrined thwt D night to » consultation which could hake been held at any time, *but it can be cured in time with healthy living.' “ ‘But that does nut belo me to-night.'

A TRIUMPH OF MEDICINE.

said my patient, pushing the box of cigars toward me. ‘“You are suffering to-night?’ I asked with my most professional air. “ ‘Yes, I am perfectly certain that I shall not sleep a wink. It would make me feel suicidal to go to bed and try. That is why I sent for a doctor, but I am sorry you have had to come so far.’ “ ‘Well, It is lucky that I brought some drugs with me,’ I said, opening my brief bag before me. ‘I will give you a sleeping draught for tonight, but you must give up drugs and live healthy and take plenty of exercise and diet yourself If you really want a cure.’ ---—- “I took out the soporfle I had prepared before starting as I spoke, but the old gentleman shook his head hopeless*. TyT ' ' T~; , •‘ ‘lt is not the least use giving me drugs, doctor,’ he said. ‘I have saturated my system with them and they have no effect upon me.’ .... “Then may I ask why you have sent for me?’l asked, feeling very much like losing my temper. “ ‘Well, it Is like this, doctor,’ he said, placidly. ‘I can’t sit up all night by myself. I feel as though I should (■go-mad If I do, T must hn ve-samebody-to talk to.’ “‘And you-mean to tell me ’ I began hotly, and paused for want of words to express my Indignation. “My patient took advantage of the pause to proceed in his gentle, half T apologetic manner: ‘“I assure you, doctor, that I looked upon it quite as a business matter. I do not look upon a physician as a philanthropist, but as a business man, whose chief Inducement After all is to make.; money. ... May. 1. ask what your usual fee is?’ “ ‘My usual fee Is seven and six pence,’ I said, severely. 1 was a modest beginner in thOSlT€ays:T s ßtirwh®r 3 I am called out in the night ’ “ ‘You make it higher, of course,’ put in my patient, impertubably; ‘shall we say ten shillings?’ “I nodded. • , “ ‘And may. I ask how long your visit usually takes?’’ ' - ‘lt varies from five minutes to an hour.’ . j, “The man performed a short calculation on his fingeri. . •“ ‘Then We>'maly call your average visit thirtv-tw > and a half minutes,’ he said quietly. . ‘Well, l am quite prepared to pay you ten shillings fdr every thirtytwo and minutes thaty9U remain with me. , You came in at exactly 12:20. Allow me to pay you up till seven min-, utes to I.’ He gravely handed me half a sovereign as, he qppkc,; wqnt on : ‘lf you prefer it 1, havq not the least objectloa to yoiir giving hife medical advice all -the time you are herd, although that Is qplte immaterial to mq, so long as you talk abetut something, .and keep me from the loneliness that I *dread. Do hlke-’a cigar arid help yourself to the whisky.’ “His tope wgs so business-like land matter-of-fact that is was Impossible to quarrel with him. Besides, his evident dread of being alone, which so many victims of Insomnia have, appealed to sympathies. I was not successful enough then to .’disregard ‘ the chance of gaining a ‘ rich and eccentric patient, the very class who make the profession worth practicing, .from a pecuniary point of view. I made.no .demur, therefore, but tb stay at lojst until 1 had given him directions rSr curing his want of bleep by systematic exercHe and plAih living, and I, lighted one of his cheroots, which were, Indeed, excellent. > ■ .>'. 1 > il<M iloum t;rt i “At the end of half ap hour I rose to go. Hut my btrango phtleh# pVeSileil with me so earnestly to accept apoMwjr fee, and stay an J><wK,ai?ro that; !I scarcely bad the heart to leave him. * A flesh ijba bbchbred 1 to me. l *“ ‘I will stay on--one conbiflon,’' 1 jl said; ‘thatyou lie dOwn and let me ! to get you; to sleep,’ I felt tbat.jf I could succeed In dolnm so I should have dopje something [& Jvtsiifj iny“ visit anjl shmtld be able ( <o get bUbk to b«d without Any, -dAtigpei Qflfdffondiuki a possible [. He agreed Instantly, and drew up ia ’comfortable-Woking '■conch' hoi tii'e’ Btjb in place -of his chair. uiT m alrmv ! h“ i'M 1 *FW ¥> t sleep, will you promise not to leave me till’ 1 1 iam 'OffY’ h'b’ ‘uafa. 0 pretty «onfld«iit of my linUiOr - gCtieknyVMuiiff AtP'tl|eend of half an myself on my success, when tbo old gentleman jumped up wide awake, and fishing in his pocket, produced another half aoverelgn.

soothing.’ ’ __ ... . —‘ i l-wa6 getting desperately sloopy-my*-self, and more than ever anxious to suemm iotisly. ‘lf I go to sleep how on earth -shall I kmrw vlTmt 1 owe yon?’ - -r-Tr'i-tnunfi tlm4i*o:ilbe<’v4'Pai<l, agam, with what seemecTfike complete sUbcebir? till ■ at' 2 o’clotk jmnpedefepsitsJlivdljOs me with my fourth foe. : j S( suceßsS-'rbicie deepl vftMcb prewirtOd ;foe leaving 1 the old gentleman to his fate? ’gofting homer"wben ; ahothet .thought suggested itself to pie. -, TJ ’ “The slqepiug draught be had refused was lying on the table before me. He admitted having tkken large quantities of every known drug, but this was a very strong one, and might affect him more than he expected,’if I could get him to take it. He had ,reifnsed so' pointblank before that I did not ask his consent, but slipped it quietly, into a glass while I was reading.

" ‘Perhaps another glass of whisky will help you,’ I said, filling it up; ‘try drinking it straight off.’ “It appeared to me to take effect verj quickly, but I did not flatter myself on the point until my fee became due, when, finding that my patient did not stir, I rose softly, put on my hat and coat, and, turning down the lamp, felt my way downstairs in the dark, and let myself out. of the house? ——-

—“As I walked home I told myself that I had secured a desirable patient, and already given him some reason t<J have faith in my powers. The four half-sovereigns jingled pleasantly in my pocket, and I had still time left to got a good sleep before it was necessary to begin the day’s work. “But rest was not for mo yet awhile. As I opened my own door with .a latcliliey a -single glance iff the halt was sufficient to put another complexion on the case, and I strode rapidly through the house, to find that it had been ransacked from top to bottom. “My old friend with the insomnia was simply the accomplice of a gang ot burglars, who had taken this means of keeping me out of the way while his friends removed the greater part of my portable property. It seemed to me as ff tfrey must have taken it away in a furniture van. “I hurried off at once to the neighboring police station, and the inspector in; charge looked serious. “ ‘lt seems to nte like the work of ai gang that we have been bearing of foij sometime, but that we can’t get hold of,’ he said. - ■ ‘“Well, I think I can take you >to si house where you will find one of the gang,’ I said, and told him briefly of lriy spatient. . . j .i.,“Tbe. policeman smiled a., superior smile. “ ‘He is one of the ’ gang, withdrij doubt? as wbll as tile lad I who brought the house now. You will find that hq has taken the room furnished for "a day or two, And vanished the iustani yon left the place.’ 1 ,>.■ ! . “‘I have no dopbt that was the pla,n,f I said, ‘but I happened to give th< gentleman a dose W’hich. if lie isn’t a$ used .to drugs* as he. pretended, will r keep liigi asleep for a week.’ ” . j ‘“And did you find him?' “Yes, hxactiy as I ieft liiiri. I fiaq souie tr-ouble bringing him around. A* we. thought, be was a. notoripus criminal, and his arrest led to that of the whole*- gftng, and—wlurt whs of more importance to me—l!Wrecovery of mv furniture. It has often made me smile to think of my little.sleeping drquglil effecting what the whole.police force of the metropolis had been trying to do for months. I gall it a triumph of medicine."— Ghlengo Chronicle. i