Rensselaer Republican, Volume 27, Number 13, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 November 1894 — OUR PLEASURE CLUB. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

OUR PLEASURE CLUB.

Pillar—The people complain that your sermons are too long. Clergyman—lndeed? Pillar—Yes.- Only last Sunday the orchestra was compelled to omit two Chopins and an impromptu. Cora —I hear your friend, theart»t, is making some headway.’ Merritt—Yes; this month he gave up cooking his breakfast in his studio, and by the fall he hopes to be able to hire a room to sleep in. “What’s the reason,neighbor, that you drink such a quantity of beer from the city brewery?" “Why, you see, I have just bought some "stock in the brewery, and I want to increase the dividends!” “Mary, how was it I saw you treating your friends to my cake and fruit?” Mary—l can’t tell, ma’am, for I’m shure I covered the keyhole. He—What made you think this was a bargain? She—You stupid man, didn’t I get it on Monday? “What in the world did you invite Mr. Notrauch for? He’s no singer and ” . She —I know, dear, but he’ll be sure to.wear a chrysanthemum, and I’ll have him sit over in that dull corner to give a touch of color there. Day time or night time. Every time's a bright time — Country’s jest as happy as kin be! , Never mind the cotton—The very fattest 'possum’s up the tree! Day time or night time; Every time's the right time— Bright skies from the mountain to the soa; Tighten up your tether— Call the dogs together; The very fattest ’possum’s up the tree! —Atlanta Constitution. “What is Jackson doing fora living now?”.,. , “Just holding his hands.” “How does he expect to succeed that way?” “Sometimes with a bluff and sometimes, aces.”

Tommy—Sa5 r , Tubby, want ter join our theatricals? Tubby (beaming)—You bet I do! Tommy—All right. Come round ter ther barn ternight. We’re going ter play “A Moonlight Crime,” and we want year ter stick yer head over the fence— Tubby—What for? Tommy The moon. She—Goodness alive! has some accident happened? He —Yes; breakfast is ready on time. “Did you visit any of the old ruins while you were abroad?” She-—No; but we saw any number of them out driving in the parks. Mrs. Wigglestein—Do you know, Jack, I think I should like to learn to play poker?’\ Mr. Wigelstein—Great heavens! Ethel, don’t think of it for a moment. We can’t both afford to play. ■ • Yager—The market is overstocked with different kinds of fire escapes. Any idea which is the best? Gottbounced (sadly) —I suppose it is resignation. “Ah,” said the casual caller, seeing the poet busy at work in the adjoining room, “the fire of genius is burning, eh?” • “No,” said the poet's practical wife; “I guess it is his cigarette thai smells so.” “ •