Rensselaer Republican, Volume 26, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 10 May 1894 — Page 6

THE REPUBLICAN. GzvU K. Marshall, Editor. RENSSELAER - INDIANA

“Ip thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself; but if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.” Shbtep shearing by steam is an innovation recently introduce;! in this country from Australia. The first trial of the apparatus was made at Casper, Wyo., April 23. Mrs. J. B. Okie sheared an unresisting bleater in five minutes and pronounced the machine “O. K." The time is coming, apparently when the right to work for a living will be denied to all who are not able to pay a bonus or provide themselves with the latest patent right ia their particular line of endeavor. A boa coxsTßtcroa at the Ade laide, Australia, Zoological Gardens, recently swallowed a Persian ruir ten feet square. The diet proved too heavy for the “delicate” creature, who, after two months mature and deliberate reflection, concluded to disgorge the fruit of the Eastern loom. The carpet was not particularly damaged and at last accounts the reptile was doing well. This snake cost the Gardens §IO.OOO, and . the authorities are greatly elated at the escape of their pet from what they feared would prove a fatal attack of indigestion. Tins Viking ship, now in New Orleans, has been sold to a syndicate of Chicago Scandinavians and will be returned to the World's Fair city, so it is now said. It is hard to keep track of all the reports about this boat and the Ferris wheel. The last rumor concerning the great revolver is that it will speedily he removed to New York. If the wheel is to be removed, now that the Peristyle and the Agricultural Building are ruined and the beauty of the Court of Honor forever destroyed, it does not matter particularly what becomes of the Viking ship. It is all very well as far as it goes, but it was a trifling attraction in comparison to these greater ones that we can see no more.

Pardons with a string to them have been a favorite diversion with the President of late. Recently Mr. Cleveland "ranted a pardon to a woman, who had been convicted of a crime, on condition that she would leave the country and 'Stay out. And again, last week, in granting clemency to a man convicted of counterfeiting,, the crime having been committed while under the influence of liquor, the President affixed a note stating that the pardon had been granted on condition that the person abstain from intoxicating liquors for five years. Grover is liable to have some trouble in enforcing the conditions imposed, but there is no doubt that their imposition will have a certain restraining influence on the parties most concerned. They will very likely try to live up to the requirements, or at least labor very hard to keep any further transgressions from the President’s knowledge. We don’t care much, but as a matter of general interest, will state that “straws” indicate that the Liberal party, of which Mr. Gladstone was the great head, is liable to retire from power at the next general election in England. This does not affect the G. O. M., as he has already retired. Lord Rosebery "not appear to inspire a great deal of enthuiasm or confidence in the great mass of British voters. By-elections to fill vacancies caused by the acceptance of peerages and elevation to office of members of the Commons, show that if the per cent, of gain made by the Nationalists is maintained at the next general election, Lord Rosebery will also retire from the Premiership, and the cause of Irish home rule will receive a back set that it will not soon recover from. Evidently the young Premier will have to “hump” himself if he cares to retain the control of Queen Victoria’s purse strings. We are not especially desirous of acquiring a reputation as a “kicker,” but will nevertheless remark that something is out of joint when summer homes at Newport, which are bo much affected by the New York “nobs,” are called “cottages,” when they rent for anything less than $4,000 for the summer season. Above that rate, up to $25,000 for the season, they are dignified by the title of “villa.” Many summer homes at Newport arAsaid to have cost their owners upwards of $1,000,000. The distribution of wealth is the great problem of the future. We never expect tp get “our” share. The realou for our objection to the name of “cottagn” as applied to a residence

that will rent for $4,000 for the summer season, extending over not more than four months, may not be obvious at a glance, but we insist that this a term intended to mislead. The millionaires Who own and rent these “cottages,” which are in fact stately and costly mansions, do not care to have the general public know that they are so recklessly extravagant. Hence they assume an humble tone, and would have people believe that they are living quietly by the seashore in an humble “cottage” devoid of architectural attractions or the lavish luxury to which they are daily accustomed when at home. It is important that our readers keep posted about the beatification of saints which is taking place al Rome quite frequently. The Pope can make a saint so easy that it is a wonder, he does not construct one every day. The last shade of a departed prelate to be thus honored was Juan Davilar, the “Apostle of Andalusia.” Seven"thouaand Spanish pilgrims and twenty Spanish pilgrims were present, and imposing ceremonies were conducted at the Vatica Basilica, wherever that is. Thirty thousand Roman spectators were also present. The Pope was carried into the basilica on the seclia gestatoria and proceeded to bless the portrait of Davilar, after which Juan immediately became a saint, and can be worshipped as such with impunity and without blasphemy. The ceremonials of the Church of Rome are said to be magnificent to a degree of splendor unequalled by any temporal power.

Another gigantic irrigation enterpriselfas been hatched in the boundless, arid West. Inhabitants of the parched plains of Colorado and Kansas are complaining at the useless waste of water that annually flows to the Gulf via the un navigable upper end of the Missouri river, as well as objeetjng to the damage that results from the great spring freshets in the same stream, and are now urging that the money that is being spent on the levees of the lower Mississippi by the government, be used to dig a canal along the foot of the eastern slope of. the Rocky mountains that will carry off this surplus moisture of the Big Muddy -and divert it to the drought-stricken regions of Dakota, Wyoming, Colorado, and Northern Texas. This could undoubtedly be accomplished if the government should set about it in a determined wav, A large amount of the s-urnlus water in -the Kankakee swamps could also be transported to the stricken country in tank cars by- the same powerful agency. Northern Indiana should begin to look after its interests. If the government is going into th? irrigation business it may as well come in for its share of the “swag,”

PEOPLE.

The richest actor in Franco is Constant Coquelin, who is said to be worth 5,000,000 francs. Manuel Garcia, who taught Jenny Lind, is still teaching, although he is in his ninetieth year. The book which Gladstone referred to in his last speech against the Lords, “Fifty Years of the Hous< of was written by Editor Stead. J The visiting card, of the German Emperor is four times as large as ac ordinary card for gentlemen, and or it is engraved “Wilhelm, Deuhsehei Kaiser and Konig von Preussen.” Representative Charles Morgan, ol Missouri, served in a Wisconsin regiment during the war, and enjoy* the distinction of having been captured by the Confederates five times and escaping on each occasion, in one instance jumping from a railroad train at night. Some time ago John M. Smith, o! Pleasant Valley, Pa., predicted that he would die on his ninety-seventk birthday, then closely approaching Monday was Smith’s birthday, and true to his prophecy, he expired.

PrOf. Ernst Haeckel, the “German Darwin,” who has just celebrated his sixtieth birthday, has been connected with the University of Jena thirty-three years, declining calls to the larger universities of Vienna. Wurzburg, Strasbourg and Bonn.’ Bismarck was among those who sent him congratulations, and addresses were received from many German and foreign universities. A collection for a bust of Haeckel, to b# placed in the university building, yielded $2,000 more than was needed, the surplus being applied by Haeckel to scientific uses. Mascagni, the composer of “Cavalleria Rusticanna,” is exceedingly superstitious. Ho is said to fear especially the “Jettatura” —th 3 “evil eye” —and always carries a number of amulets to protect himself against its influence. When he crosses the street he always walks on the very edge of the crossing if possible, it is said, believing it to be bad luck to walk as ordinary mortals do. He also carries two watches—one extremely valuable, and the other a simple silver one, which, he says, always brings him luck.

WOEFUL WEALERS.

“Jordan Am a Hard Road tc Trabbel.” Trials and T ibul ;tlons of the Various Disrislons of the Commonweal Army. .. V' An enterprising real estate man al Washington has offered to set the Coxeyites at work. He has a tract of land aboul three and a half'miles distant from the city, which ho desires to have cleared ol underbrush and made ready for subdivision. It is a pretty spot, and much healthier than the place now occupied by the Coxeyites. The owner. Dr. G. P, Gehering. offered to let the army camp on the tract and'to pay them $303 if they would clear the ground. The proposition struck Coxey favorably, but Browno was unwillling to move the camp so far from the city, and the offer was rejected. The eighth day of Kelley's stay at De i Moines.saw Ills array hard at work building boats. All day Sunday the detail of 300 mechanics worked faithfully, and by night nearly fifty- boats were far advanced toward completion, and at 5 o’clock the first boat was launched. It is expected that all will be ready for debarkation by Wednesday. Galvin's army left Homestead, Sunday, and marched to McKeesport. A dispatch from Valparaiso, May 0, says; Randall is already having trouble with his army. A number of the dissatisfied Held a meeting to-day. It was charged that the quartermaster was not dealing fairly; that sardine sandwiches had reached the officers and favors in abundance, while the rank and file had to subsist on bread and water. The mutinous ones also complained of the advance work of the missionaries and fail to see any result from the amount of money put up to keep them in the field. If the present indications may be depended on there will be a large number of desertions very soon. The trial of Coxey, Browne and Jones wot? continued in the Washington police) court, Saturday. Representative Pence created something of a sensation by de. -during that it was evident that the Court was endeavoring to help the, prosecuting officers out of a hole, from which they, ha J shown absolute incapacity to lift themselves. "Canyon show any impropriety in the questions'.’'' asked the Judge, “J can object that the questions aye absolutely improper and misleading,” respond* cd Mr. Pence.

COL. BRECKINRIDGE’S DEFENSE.

Col. W. FT P. Breckinridge was greeted at Lexington, Kyi, Saturday, by an audience as ?.,(;0) people, representing the Seventh Congressional district, and mado a lengthy and eloquent speech in his own behalf. Referring to his candidacy, he said that he did not regard a possible re-election as a “vindication or condonation” of his course in the Pollard matter. Continuing he said; Ido not wish this district to conceivo that! have any defense to make for what 1 have done, and of which I havo been guilty. Entangled by weakness, by passion,-by sin, in coils which it was almost impossible to break. LI did -verything that- was within my (powerto prevent, a public scandal except the one tiling w hich for no moment -ever entered my mind. Your re-election of mo -can wither take from nor add to the punishment 1 have suffered. It has not been hypocrisy .that my life has not been consistently wrong; I knew the secret sin;; I tried to atone for it in ways that it is not bomining in me to more than allude. If some one in your midst can better do the work you w a it done a; your representative, choose him; I■ shall submit; some me whose life lia; been stainless, whose nora's your young men can imitate -with profit; whose’ days have been pure and whose nights have been sinless; whose ability is a mple; whose experience is wide. For a hundred y< ars this district ha; been represented by men. They have not ihe-ays been-siniess'nmn.-and■ whether ytm-;v-e.ect or reject me, her. after when some one eome; to write its history, whatever biame.nia.’ at!a di to me, he will write of me Tb at,even wit It tim t hi a mo, ire loved the poor. heUmilei for liis fellow-men. he abored for good i a isos: and at this his—mrhui turns over the pares of the record in' which my; uttmanccs are contained, lie will rise from them with the-belied that l warioyal to my principles, faithful to truth, devoted to you.

THE ANTWERP EXPOSITION.

The International Exposition of Belgium \va? foranrly open >1 at Antwerp, Saturday.by KitipLedpbhl. in the presence of 100,00) spectators. The flags of the United Slates and of Belgium were intertwined on the canopy over the royal chair, and the play ing of the “Star Spahglod Banner’’ by the Orchestra Grande Militaire was the signal for a great Outburst of enthusiasm. After the exercises the King and foreign -representatives made a tour of the buildings, and were afterward entertained at luncheon by the Exposition authorities. Stanislas 11. llaino and James I\ Holland, of Chicago, respectively special delegate and secretary of the commission of the Utiitcd States, were extended distinguished consideration during the exercises. The Exposition is in a far from complete state, and at least another month will bo required to finish the work. It occupies two hundred acres of ground in a new quarter of the city, beside the river Scheldt. Its main buildings, constructed of iron and steel, and roofed with zinc, cover 1,080.000 square feet. They are continuous with one another. covering the west and northwest sides of the grounds, and thus forming an jobtuse angle. The American building 1* a handsome structure, 240 x 150 feet There are numerous foreign villages, and an American! plaisanco. Tho principal novelty of the Exposition is a castle in the air, or case, seating 500, supported above tho tops of the buildings by balloons. Anderson is getting to bo a great horst market. , ,

Progress of Cremation.

'There are now thirty-nine crematories in various parts of tho world. Italy has twentv-three, America has ten, while England, Germany, France, Switzerland, Denmark and SwcdewT have one each. In Italy there were two cremations in 1876; the number rose to fifteen iu 1877, and in 1888 the number was 226. Since 1876. 1,177 cremations have taken place in Italy, while the combined numbers from all other countries brings the total only to 1,269.

POPULIST PLANS.

A Great Convocation at Indian* apolis, May 23. An Old-Fashioned Campmeeting to B« Held—so.ooo People Expected to Come In Wagonk, The Populists are expecting a great time at Indianapolis, May 23, the time set for all good Populists to meet there and consider the trials and tribulations that beset our country. The call has met with a quick response, and the leaders now state that there will be 50.033 people in the city. Just what they expect to accomplish more than ‘’an awakening of the people” is not known, although it i 3 confidently stated that the result will be apparent. The sight of wagons laden with people making for the State capital is anticipated to arouse an interest in Populist ideas and a grand demonstration there, with speechmaking included, is expected to bring the workingmen to “a realization of their condition.” A letter from Frankfort states that Clinton county will send over seventy-five wagons and as many as 503 people. Howard county promises to send 1,003 people, and twenty wagons have already been engaged In Madison county. The army of Populists will probably establish a camp on the banks of Fall creek or at the Fair-grounds, provided the latter can be engaged. Congressmen Pence, the Colorado Populist, will probably be tho speaker of the occasion.

BIG FIRE AT MUNCIE.

Total Destruction of the Wh teley ileaper Work 4. The Whiteley reaper works at Muncie were destroyed by fire, Sunday ovening. The loss on the buildings, which were construetedmf wood and galvanized iron, is not great, but the destruction of 3,000 machines ready for shipment and 1,500 almost completed, the patterns, which were an accumulation that havo cost thousands of dollars, and the costly new machinery that filled the factory, brings the loss up to $345,(XX) without a cent of insurance. Vhiteley moved his factory to Muncie from Springfield, 0., two years ago, and has since furnished employment to from 300 to 503 men, a majority oi whom camo there with him from Springfield. Mr. Whiteley arrived from Chicago while the fire was in progress, He said that tho factory would probably be rebuilt on a much larger scale.

BRECKINRIDGE FORGIVEN.

At Lexington, Ky., Saturday evening, at a meeting of the session of the Mt. Iloreb church, of which Colonel Breckinridge is a member, and over which his father once presided, he was summoned to appear. Col. Breckinridge confessed his guilt in about the same way he testified in the case just decided, and prayed for forgiveness, saying that he had repented and would live a new life in the future. After a consultation he was forgiven and taken into the church again. Tills is the second Kentucky statesman who has embraced religion in the past two months, Joseph Blackburn having confessed before Moody, the evangelist, and was converted. This move, it is believed, will put Breckinridge in good standing with tho church people again. _____ Mishawaka is to have jy new paper mlffr Tho Methodist revival at Rockport closed, Thursday night, with 103 conversions. The saloon that wa ; recently blown up with dynamite at, Burlington by the temperance people is to he rebuilt. Congressman Jason IV. Brown, Seymour, has recovered from his recent illness and has resumed his canvas for ronoinination. An apple tree, measuring nine feet six inches in circumference, grows on a farm in a: Brazil. It is said to be the largest in the State. The township in which Martinsville is located is opposed to a subsidy in aid of the proposed" Indianapolis, Bloomington «fc Bedford railway. Goodwin Siddoqs, arrested at Green castle for drunkenness, committed suicide in his cell by hanging himself. He was a young man addicted to intemperance. Burglars rifled the postofiice at Sa!em« blowing the safe open and stealing $153 in ca di and a liberal supply of stamps. It is the second loss sustained by the postoffice within a year. Judge Creighton, of Springfield, 111., held the National Marriage Endowment Association wa; organized for a purpose contrary to public policy and declined to order the issuance of a license. At the Genoral.Conference of the Methodist Episcopal church, South, it was stated that there are now 341 moro local preachers than last year and 163,00) more enlisted members. The bishop's address deprecated tiie increase of the peripatetic of the Sam Jones kind.

A Frankfort schoolboy put on three pairs of trousers the other day. fully expecting to get a whipping from the teacher. The latter, however, got onto the scheme and instead of wasting his strength greeted the boy pleasantly. The next day he took his revenge. Judge Thomas M. Cooley, an authority on constitutional law, in an address to his law students at Ann Arbor, said that individuals had no right to go to tho seat of government and present petitions in person. Tho wheols of government might thus be stopped. Bo was referring to the Coxey movement. Three boys near St. Croix undertook to drown a cat. while a fourth tried to save the animal. In doing so he struck Abram Findley, eight years old, with a stone, fracturing his skull. Findley was standing waist deep in the water at the time, and ho sank underneath, and with difficulty was dragucd out and resuscitated. If tho skull is not too badly fractured he will recover

Calling Up Another World.

He was one of a number of drummers sitting in tho hotel office und he stepped up to the telephone with the remark that he was going to have a little joke on tho girl at. tho central office. ‘‘Hello!’’ he called, through the ’phono, "give me St. Peter, please.” Then he listened, and as he listened his face took on a queer expression. After a minute ho signaled that ho was through with tho wire, shrugged his shoulders and then sat down. “What did St. Peter say to you. Bob?” asked a friend. “She did’t give me St. Peter,” said Bob; “she gave me the dev 1 Puck.

AN EXPERIENCE.

Detroit Free Press. “Had a funnj* experience once,” said tlie man witb -a jerky voice, “not so blamed funny, either, when you come to think of it. Was out west in them days, looking for the fortune that never got there; had lots of luck though; bad luck; walkin’ one time from nowhere trying to get somewhere before it rained; met a man on a hoss; good hoss, too; I’m a judge; asked me if 1 wouldn’t Take him to his owner four miles down the road; glad enough to do it, I was; had walked 37 i miles between meals and was feelin’ wobbly on my pins anyway; always liked to ride a hoss, anyway, got up when he got down and hadn’t more than straddled him than I begun to feel like a gent. Two miles down the road I met up with a party. ‘ 1 ‘H— —, ’ says. they, ‘here’s our hoss.’ “ ‘The man I got him from,’ says I, ‘told me to deliver him four miies down the road; ain’t used to riding here lately, thought I'd come only about half way?’ “ ‘Wow,’ says they with & ..yell, and begun to drag me off. Thought I stole him; said so, too. in a mighty disagreeable tone of voice. “ 'We hang hoss thieves in these parts,’ says they, gettin’ out a rope; thought they was goin’ to halter the hoss and go after the man that lent him to me. “ ‘You’ll have to hurry or he’ll get away,’ says I, thinking of the other feller. ——‘Will he?” says they, with a yell, and with that they slung the rope over my head. “Hold on.” says I. “I ain't —” “You bet we will,” says they, and began to haul her taut. That scared me in seven places and I begun to beg. I told ’em how it happened and they held an ante-mortem inquest on me, as they called it. and, brought in a verdict to give me the benefit of the doubt; didn't know exactly what that was, but I didn’t have to wait long to find out. They .said tfiey’d leave it to me, so they took me off on a side road; didn’t like the looks of things, but I had to go; they tied my hands behind me, put the rope around my neck, stood me on a stump, throvved the loose end of the rope over a limb, made it just tight enough to be uncomfortable, told me if I didn’t like it that way I could step off the stump, and they rode away. The jerky voice seemed to have a choke in it. “Reckon I was in the worst fix I'd been in since I came West,” it went on; “cussed horseback v rtdin’ and wished to thunder I’d walked; wondered what kind of a man it was anyway that would put me up a stutup like that, and begun to get tired in the legs; feet sore from walkin’ and standin’ wasn’t agreeable; tried to git my-hands loose and like to fell off the stump; didn’t try any more; wasn't in no hurry to start the funeral; looked down off the stump and thought it was a mile to the ground; guess it wasn't so far as that; tried to gnaw the rope off, but couldn’t reach, not being a giraffe; gittin’ tireder all the time; begun to think of mother, home and friends and sav my prayers; tireder and tireder and don’t know what happened next; come to after while and saw the man that had lent me the blamed hoss rubbin’ my hands and giftin’ up a circulation. “ ‘Just got here in time.’ says he, keepin’ on rubbin’ and givin' me a drink of liquor between rubs. When I come plumb to, lie told me how he had been sneakin’ ’round through the woods and come across me just, as I sorter collapsed and slid off the stump, and havin’ no hard feelings, he had come to mv help right off. “ ‘lt would have been dirt mean if you hadn’t,’ says T, \seein’ you got me into it,’ and he laughed and begged my pardon; he was a mighty polite man; laid low till after dark and I headed for home; he staid; he said he'd git even with that crowd for treating a friendgff his that way if he had to steal ah the hosses in the country, afid I hoped to thunder he would.” After which narration the jerky voioe rested.

MISCELLANEOUS NOTES. _ _ ow Itfis calculated that the average elevation of the United States is 2,500 feet. A philosopher from Bombay is in Salt Lake City investigating Mormonism. The number of cigar factories in the United States is placed at a tittle more than 33,000. As small letters weary the eye most, so also the smallest, affairs disturb us most. —Montaigne, Owing to faulty construction, the insurance rates on New York flats have been increased extensively of late. St. James, L. 1., boasts the highest and strongest windmill in the world. It frequently fills a 65,000 gallon reservoir in two days. It is estimated that over 3,090,000 of our population are in (annual need of and actually receive some kind of charitable assistance. Sara Jeannette Duncan is the lalest author to be announced. In May we are to have a two-volume up-to date society novel from her pen. Colored physicians of Baltimore, with a number of other people, have formed an association to erect a hospital for that race, and they are in hopes that it will be the nucleus of a colored “ollege of medicine.

THE UNPARALLELED MAN.

Easily the Greatest Name In th® Annals of History. Tho astonishing ease with which Shakespeare seems to have raised hie mighly lines and fine humanities is the greatest discouragement to subsequent literature. Compare hint to Tennyson, .for instance, who is still living, and has been made a baron! Tennyson has crammed himself full of culture, has weighed his lines and tried all manner of flutes and bugles, but we behold at last one who has rather buried literature and its period instead of having revived them. It may be that Tennyson is to be the last Euglish poet. There is certainly no great occasion for many more. Shakespeare never reached a higher dignity than that of “gentleman,” and even that was probably an ascription of his posterity. He lived in a time when the past still stood colossal and the future was like a new-born babe within the ruins of feudal violence and power. He lived after the reformation, when Europe was on the eve of its last mighty war to settle the status of Luther and the popes. After Shakespeare was placed in his tomb there was war in Germany for thirty year 3 between the Lutheran and the Holy Roman empire. Great men were yet to be, perhaps tho greatest of all Englishmen as a ruler —Cromwell. The apprehension of Shakespeare, naturally healthy and earnest, became heightened by the vast surroundings until he rose above theologies and above literature itself, and became like a theologian of the first order, like Moses or Mohammed, or Calvin or Luther, all of them literary men. He discerned that man, with all his lofty purposes, was a mere puppet. He had lived to know that the worlds thornselves were heid in check by other worlds, and that gravity governed everywhere. Ho lived a hundred years behind Columbus, and yet had been intimate with such home events as the murder of Darnioy, the execution of Queen Elizabeth’s mother, tho massacre of St. Bartholomew and the conclusion of the Wars of the Roses. It was a time when the wisest man felt the most ignorance and the most humility, and only the fool was confident that he had the key to naluro and God. Shakespeare, therefore, generally represents man in his subject condtiion—the trifler, tho lover, y tho melancholy prince. His appreciation has been for about 250 years confined to the English nations; now it is beginning to go abroad. His statuo stands in the streets of Paris. The Germans almost regard Shakespeare as one of themselves. Two facts stand out together which the man of thought will long connect with each other—that Shakespeare was unparallelled and that the nation of men to which he belonged has constructed and maintained the greatest empire of history. This Englishman and these Englishmen explain each other. —Gath.

A NO-TO-BAC MIRACLE

PHYSICAL perfection prevented BY THE USE OF TOBACCO. An Old-Timer of Twenty-throe Years’ Tobacco Chewing and Smoking Cared, and Gains Twenty Founds in Thirty Days. Lake Geneva, Wis, May s.—Special. The ladies of our beautiful little town are making an interesting and exciting time for tobacco-using husbands, since the in urio ts effects of tobacco and the eaee with which it can be cured by a pr eparation called No-To-h'ac have been so plainly demonstrated by the cure of Mr. E. C. Waite. In a written statement he says: “I smoked and chewed tobacco for twenithree years, and I am sure that my case was one of the worst in this part of the country. . Even after I went to bed at night, if, I woke up I would want to chow or smoke. It was not only killing me but my wife was also ailing from the injurious effects. Two boxes of No-To-Buc cured me. and I have no more desire for t bacco than 1 have to jump out of the window. I have gained twenty pounds in thirty days, my wife is well, and we are-in-deed both happy to say that No-To-Bac is truly ‘ worth its weight in gold * to us.” The cure and improvement in Mr. Waite’s case is looked upon as a miracle—in fact, it is the talk of the town and county, and it is estimated that over a thousand tobacoo users will be using No-To-Bac within a few weeks. The peculiarity about No-To-Bac as a patent medicine is that the makers, the Sterling Remedy Company, No. 15 Randolph street, Chicago, absolutely guarantee the use of three boxes to cure or refund the money, and the cost, $2.50, is so trifling as compared with the expensive ana unnecessary use of tobacco that tobac-co-using husbands have no good excuse to offer when their wives insist upon their taking No-To-Bac and getting result in the way of pure, swoet breath, wonderful improvement in their mental and physical condition, with a practical revitalization of their nicotizcd nerves. v

Presence of Umbrella, Rather.

There is nothing like presence of mind, after all. The other day, during a sudden thunder shower, a gentleman got on a Grand avenue car with a splendid ivory-handled silk umbrella, which ho stood between his knees. Another gentloman in the same seat, who was mourning the untimely loss of a suspiciously similar umbrella, reached out and said: •* Will you allow me to look at that?” •• Certainly,” remarked the umbrella carrier. “I was just taking it to tha police headquarters. It was left in my house last night by a burglar, that wo frightened off. I hope it will prove a first rate clue.” And though the exasperated owner could plainly see whore his name bad been scratched off the handle, he sat down again and looked vacantly out into the cald, damp gloaming.—Peck’s Sun. .