Rensselaer Republican, Volume 26, Number 30, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 March 1894 — OUR PLEASURE CLUB. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

OUR PLEASURE CLUB.

“Why do you sign your name J. John E. B. B. Bronson,” asked Hawkins. “Because it is mv name,” said Bronson. “I was christened by a minister who stuttered.” “Your husband is a traveling man isn’t he?” said one Pittsburg lady to another. w “Yes.” - “I should think you wouldn’t like his being away from home so much.” “I don’t like that, but there is one advantage.” “What is it?” “When he’s away he forgets he is married and so lie writes love letters tome.” “one on the doo.” Life. r.r i /?

‘ ‘Longer overcoats are more stylish this, winter thgn last, don’t you think?” asked Van Braam. “I can’t speak authoritatively on the subject,” repliedShingiss, “but I know that lam wearing my overcoat longer than I intended.” “Mamma,. ; how long are the yardarms of a ship?” asked Harry Hilland j • * .-If the name, is any-- indication,” replied Mrs; Hillimd, “I should say, they-were: three feet long;”-—• - dlje Qtlier . day Uglahso qhite expensive. : (Mi Bnaggs—l syppse that is true. Aiiy-ohe should know that they cost -Aiore than artificial teeth. , ‘ “How should'any one kno w that?*’ “By patent to all. The eyes come higher than the teeth.” . ' TEMPORARY DISFIGUREMENT. -

Little flertie—-Do you suppose I'm going to the picnic with such a looking thing as you? Little Tommy —M-marm p-puther wort b-basket on my head when she c-cut my hair, an’ she couldn’t c-clip ’round th’ handles—boo-hoo. Gaswell—Young Blivens boasts that he never loses his head. Tiukarie—Well. he couldn’t expect such grealluck as that, you know. &j. UvL SCENE FROM AN UNPUBLISHED DRAMA. Life

h£ar riieH >■• Led#. —Pfiaoe. ■ 'f will hear do fii’i der! , Hen*~Yob mtfsF; Leo®. —Oh, heavinks! Herl— we, firsjb met I youngland inexperiencea- I ttibljgnf I loved you— . - •I. *Tfjeoi.— Oh, I .shall go mad! J Rushes frantically from the scene. Mrs,- SnaggEk—Don’t you think my new bonnqt is a poem, love? Mr. (Snaggy—Have you paid for it? “Of course nokr * r -■ t it is a poetti, no doubt—“-an owed.”

’Zekeiel's gone to nreachln', Bob's a-studyin’law: ; . r William runs a railroad trgln—- ' Best you ever saw. L Dick-Ahe runs a gmeery store An' makes the business stir; a. gut John ain’t doin' nothin’— He's a politicianer. —Atlanta Constitution.' Johnnie (seeing his twin Cbusins for the firpt time) —Isn’t ft funny, mammp! Manima—What, dear? “Why, this baby is a philopena.” i | — ’ -JfJUIOyI IlxlJid I Understand you thU this is 4MhMt*»ty concert?” r . , * i “Yeh, I sappofeU thete ; was ■never' anything poorer put on a stage." J “I db believe I’m a perfect fright in this bonnet.” Husband—There is no need of telling people about it is one comfort. A new law of Massachusetts imposes a fine of fronv SKHo SIOO on consumers of bituminous coal in towns that do not consume threefourths of their smoke.