Rensselaer Republican, Volume 26, Number 17, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 December 1893 — CHRISTMAS QUIPS FROM “PUCK.” [ARTICLE]

CHRISTMAS QUIPS FROM “PUCK.”

A flat purse means a stout Christmas tree. Better a paid pork chop than a fat turkey on tick. A sealskin sacque makes a devout Christmas church-goer. A good dinner is the thing that takes the edge off criticism. Don’t give yourself to more than one girl as a Christmas present. It’s the foolish girl who gives her beau the mitten before Christmas. The small boy cannot be judged by his conduct on Christmas eve. Tt requires no outlay of money to wish people a merry Christmas. Price marks on Christm’as gifts are not to regarded as emblems of veracity. Blessed are the babies on Christmas day; they can be put off with cheap candy. Look not on the wine when it is red; out a.little pale brandy helps the pudding amazingly. The man who quarrels with his wife on Christmas day is w'orse than a horse-thief. Let him be anathema. There are no Christmas presents the tradesman gives with better grace than the receipted bills. Give him a chance. A head of the family expends many dollars on presents, and re seives two handkerchiefs and pair .of mitts. Then is the time to be merry. Don’t spend in gifts the money you owe your washerwoman. Presents are not numerous in times where the parents carefully teach their.,four-year-olds that Santa Claus is a mythical personage.