Rensselaer Republican, Volume 25, Number 31, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 March 1893 — OUR PLEASURE CLUB. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

OUR PLEASURE CLUB.

He was making friends with the policeman. “My good fellow,” he said, “you mustn't believe everything you hear about me.” “I don’t” responded the officer. ‘ ‘l4 1 did I'd run you in.” SUB ACIDITIES.

Gladys—Ob, Muriel dear, that heavenly frock! I think it looks lovelier every year! —From Punch. “Fred only puts on the smoking jacket I bought him when he is sick;’’ “1 did't know he was ever sick,” “He isn’t except when he tries to smoke,!’—— “Jagson says It's always a paradox of drink that- a man will get away with more than he can carry. She was the gayest of thfrg.Tjr For full a dozen seasons, And then she took to cats and tea For confidential reasons. Y—Do you believe Schiller when he says that the best woman is the one whom nobody talks about? Z - I rather think it is the one who talks about nobody. Hawson —ITaiew he was lyingjbut he offered to bet me $lO it was so. — Mawson— Did you take him up? Hawson—No. He is a lawyer, and I was afraid he could prove it. a great difference.

Mother; —“Arthur, this hurts me more than it does you!” Arthur —“Yes, mama, but not in the same place.” “Is his lordship at home?” asked a gentleman of a well-powdered flunky. “Don’t know, sir, I’m sure. I will just inquire.” He returned with the message; “No, sir; his lordship desires, me to say that- he has just gone out.” “Ah! thank you very much. Kindly give him my compliments and say I didn’t call !” “Good-bye, love. In ease I am really prevented from coming home to dinner I will send a telegram,” ■’You need not trouble to send it; I have already taken it out of your jacket pocket.”

“I suppose you can always tell when your husband wants to write; he shuts up ” Wise —No, but he don’t; I’m the one that always has to do that. “Poor Guzzler’s grief is no shortlived matter is it?” “No; he has tried every day for a year to drown it, too.” Clerk—Madam, is this the cash boy that took voflr parcel? Customer —I think not, fdr he was about the age of that boy when he started with it. “Did Miss Goldeoin look upon your suit with favor? “Oh, _yes, .she thought the clothes were all right, but she objected to the wearer.” She —Now you’ve looked over my music, what would you like to have pie play? He—Either euchre or cribbage. OVERWORK.

Roonev—Say,Pat, ye ’er a bit of a A skolard, kin ye tell me who it was ordered the sun to shtand still? Noonan —I dunno. Some son of a gun of a conthractor who wanted to got a big day’s work otit of a laborin' man, ye kin bet. —-Puck.