Rensselaer Republican, Volume 25, Number 29, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 16 March 1893 — MR. JONES’TELLS A STORY. [ARTICLE]

MR. JONES’TELLS A STORY.

Mrs. Jones Illustrates It by Frequent Remarks. Detroit Free Press. “I know the best story about Siihpson to-dav,” said Mr. Jones, as he settled himself comfortably for an evening at home. "‘You’ve seen that fur coat of his, Maria—well it was— ' “Wait till I get my sewing, Jeptha,” said Mrs. Jones.' “There, now begin.” “You know the outside" of his coat is beavei —” “Whose coat?” 7 “Why, Simpson’s” “Oh, yes. Go on.” “And it isn’t to be sneezed at—” “Oh, dear, where’s my thimble? Just let me run and get it. There, now. What was in it that Simpson sneezed at?” “Who said anything about Simpson sneezing? That’s just like a woman,” snarled Jones. “If you think you ean sit still for five minutes I’ll go on with the story. He made a bet —” “Who made a bet?” “Simpson did —that nobody could tell what the coat was lined with —” “Wasn’t it fur-lined?” “If you know the story better than I do perhaps you will tell it,” suggested Mr. Jones. “The boys all guessed—” “What boys?” “The. fallows—the crowd—” b {“Let me get this need e ihrea led,” said Mrs. Jones,- as she tried to thread the point of a cambric needle. “I can listen better when I am sewing. Go on.” “We were all in it, so we guessed cat skin —’’

“Jeptha, that reminds me. I haven’t seen old Tom to-day.” “Confound old Tom! Will you listen, Maria, or—■” “Wait till the scissors roll by. There! I am all ready. Was not that the door bell? Now for the story.” “We guessed the skin of every animal in the catalogue—” “What catalogue?” - “Heavens, Maria, you’ll drive me mad! Simpson won the bet, and —” “What bet?” “About the lining. It was —” “Then it wasn’t a cat?” “No! no! It was a calf—when he was in it —ha! ha! See?” “Rather fur-fetched, wasn’t?” said Mrs. Jones, yawning. Then Jones rose to offer a few feeble remarks about telling a story to a woman and expecting her to see the point, etc. etc. There are several things that may be done to promote the fertility of eggs at this season. In the first place, fewer hens should be given to one male bird now than would be practicable in summer. Right to twelve hens to a rooster are plenty. Provide fresh meat and some green succulent food, sucl\as the cabbage, and the breeding pen will be found much more satisfactory. Make the fowls work. Have bones and litter in which to scatter small grains,that the hens may be obliged to scratch to get the kernels out. The observance of these rules will tend toward & greater degree of fertility in win-ter-laid eggs.