Rensselaer Republican, Volume 25, Number 25, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 16 February 1893 — OUR PLEASURE CLUB. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

OUR PLEASURE CLUB.

Merchant—Now here is a piece of goods that speaks for’ itself. Uncle Hayseed—Wffll, that would not suit Mandy, she likes to do her own talkin’. He (looking through catalogue)— HererTsee No, 17 is “A Bust of Pallas.” She —Just stop; I won’t go look at no drunken scene, I don’t care if it is in an art gallery. , Mr. N. E, Very late —Have you ceased to care for me, Adele? I came earlier this afternoon, and you do not even look glad to see me. Miss Adele Sarteau—lndeed. I am glad to see you! But this is my hour for resting my features from ail expression. House-hunter—And how about the neighborhood’s health ? is there any fever and ague here? Agent—Fever and ague? Well, let’s see. Just what is that? —Harper’s Bazar. "Old Friend —What became of that beautiful full length portrait of yourse.f and your first husband? Mrs. Twotimes—lt is hidden away up garret. My second husband has never seen it yet. I’m keeping it for a snrprise. Old Friend—A surprise? Mrs. Twotimes—Yes. If ever again he gives me a ten cent bottle of perfumery for a Christmas present, I’ll give him that painting for a New Year’s present. Wife (significantly)—That pocketbook you gave me for a Christmas present-wan empty. ■ - ”' 7 ;- ’ Husband (grimly)—Yes, it was mine. Stranger—Where is the courthouse? Boy—’Bout six blocks west from here. Stranger—But I don’t know which way is west. Boy—W’y jus’ stan’ with your face to th’ north, an’ then - y*r right hand’ll point east and y’r left hand west. Thort everybody knew that Mother —Horrors! Where did you get that dog? Young Hopeful—He followed me home. “Hum! Why did you coax him?” I vdidn|t coax him. I threw things at him, but he would come anyhow.” • “That’s strange. What did you throw?” “A lot of hard, uglv old bones the butcher gave me.” □ Mr. Nicefello (playfully)—What makes your ears so big? Small Terror—Sis pulls ’em like everything overy time I tell on ’er. The Very Latest.

■Weary Walker —“Great Scott! yer comes de conductor an I ain’t got ho ticket.”

Conductor—‘Where’s your ticket?’ Walker—“ Hat jus’ blowed out de winder wid de ticket in it. SeeT*

“But I has a string tied to de hat—

—an don’t yer forgit it.' Talk about yer Ediaons."—Judgo.