Rensselaer Republican, Volume 23, Number 29, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 March 1891 — Page 7

The brusque and fussy impulse of these days of false impression would rate down dUI as worthless because one is unworthy. ; As if there were no motes in sunbeams! Or comets among stars ! Or cataracts in peaceful rivers f Because one remedy professes to do what it never was adapted to do, are all remedies worthless? Because one doctor lets his patient die, are all humbugs ? _lt requires a fine eye and a finer brain to discriminate —to draw the differential line. “ They say ” that Dr. Pierce’s Golden Medical Discovery and Dr. Pierce’s Favorite Prescription have cured thousands. “ They say ” for a weak system there’s nothing better than the “ Discovery,” and that the “ Favorite Prescription ” is the hope of debilitated, feeble women who need a restorative tonic and bracing nervine. And here’s the proof Try one or both. If they don’t help you, tell the World’s Dispensary Medical Association so, and you get your money back again.

SHILOirS CONSUMPTION CURE. ~ • r The success of this Great Cough Cure li without a parallel in the history of medicine. All druggists are authorized to sell it on a positive guarantee, a test that no other cure can successfully stand. That it may become known, the Proprietors, at an enormous expense, are placing a Sample Bottle Free into every home In the United States and Canada. If you have • Cough, Sore Throat, or Bronchitis, Use it, for U will cure you. If your child has the Croup, or Whooping Couch, use it promptly, and relief Is stmt. If you dread that insidious disease Consumption, use it. Ask your Druggist for SHILOH’S CURE, Price locts., 50 cts. and ♦t 00. If your I.ungs are sore or l’ack lame, tie Shiloh’s Porous Plaster, Price 25 cts. PURIFY YOUR BLOOD. But do not tis? the dangerous alkaline and mercurial preparations which destroy your nervous system and ruin the digestivo power of the stomach. The vegetable kingdom gives us the best and safest remedial agents. Dr. Sherman devoted the greater part otitis life to the discovery of this reliableand safe remedy, and all its ingredients ara vegetable. He gave it the name el Prickly Ash Bitters I a name ovary one can remember, and to tho present day nothing has been discovered that is so beneficial for the BLOOD, (or the LIVER, for the KIDNEYS and (or the STOMACH. This remedy is now so well and favorably known by all who have used 11 that arguments as to its merits are use> less, and it others who require a corrective to the system would but give it a trial the health of this country would be vastly improved. Remember the name—PRICKLY ASH BITTERS. Ask your druggist (or it. PRICKLY ASH BITTEtiS CO,, ST. LOTTTS, MO JH§" Or. White’s Dandelion Alterative. T find it the best remedy for Dyspepsia, Biliousness, Klicumatism, Kcnralgia, end all disorders of the Ntomach, I,lvor and Kidneys. It purifies the blood, makes the weak strong and gives to the old the vlvor of ventti. ELY’S CUBA M HAI M BfiSP'r. 1M L -est Applied luto Kurtrils ij quick I'KJe-LIRE fOW 7W Absorb (I, Cleanses tin- Htmd.^FJ-'ATARH*'—I Haul, tlio S-orcs nnd Cures mCQf n lu uC API mtrarhM Beitores Taste and smell, nninU.K S -fl| |y Relieve* (’old in Heed andflHl W Headache, .'die. at hrugiri«tfi. ELY BROS., 66 Warren St N, Y A. The Soap that Cleans Most is Lenox.

PORT SAID’S POOH-BAH.

Ontwitrod tho Merchant Marrl.ob, bat Cavern to the Man With tke Plug nat. tan Francisco Chipnicle. There we-e so if of us standing near the register at the Palace Hotel counter last night -t ’o tall man with the scar on h s neck, the short, fat man with the four days’ beard, the proud owner of the Plug Hat, and He. “You have been a newspaper man?” asked the tall n an. “Uh. yes. out in Austra’ia ” He answered. “I was first at Melbo irne anu then .at Sidney. That was jus-: before the Egyptian war.” “And you became a warrior, of course?” “Well. I went out as correspondent. I had letters to Baker Pasha, who had been at school with an uncle of mine. •‘Baker Pasha sent me to Port Said at a salary of £SUO. He said hs wo-ild in a short time give me charge at Port Said at £7UO. All that mme about. At Port Said, you know, there is a gov. ernor, usually a Turk; a stipendiary magistrate, a Turk or an Egyptian; a commandant of gendarmerie a id various con-uis. You heard the Mikalo? You remember Pooh-Bah? Wei 1 , sir. I was the Pooh-Bah of Port Said. I was co nmamlant of gendarmerie. The governor went away and the stipendiary magistrate bee tme acting governor. The English Consul went away and asked me to act for him in nia absence. Then tho stipendiary magistrate went away and left me acting for him and also acting governor. There f was, a regular Pooh-Bah. Now, I’ll tell you how all these things worko.l into each other. There was a man at Port Said named Mayriseh. He kept the 1 irgCst store in the place, where you could get anything from an anchor to a needle, He also ha I a big gambling house, the El Dorado, opposite his store. He made £200,000 there the first year of the wr; bo you may imagine what thi place was worth to him. I dealt with Mayriseh, running up quarterly bills. He must have thought I was going away, for ho sent mo in my bill for £z ß before the«qnarier was up. I refused to pay until the usual time. He said he would summons me. ’All right,’ I said, ‘summons away.’ That afternoon when I got up—l always slept from about 3: 0 o’clock until 6— l sent two gendarmes to the bank to get Mayrisch’a account. Of course, as commandant, all accounts were open to me. He had £13.t0.) balan e, and I know he owned his house and had property in Italy and Maita, so he was not in need of my £26, Whjn I re urued I told an Eng ish de e tire to go down to Mayrisch’s store after 9 o’ lock that night and tate a drink there. The place was not licensed, nnd drinking after 9 o’clock was ag.iinst the law and auhjecte l the propertv to sei'.ure and Sale and removal of the business to ten miles from Port Said.

••The detective got tho drink, and ne't morning, shortly after o o’clo k, as Marish was going to board the ship in the harbor, two gendarmes accosted him an 1 told him he was under arrest and was to appear at the cou.-t of tha commandant (that was me at (i o’clock. He appeared, and I told him he could elect to be tried before the stipendiary magistrate. Tint was me again. I could fine him only 400 piastres as com, m ndant. but as stipendiary magistrate I could confiscate his propeity. He did not know I was acting as stipendiary. He elee'ed to appear before the st pondiary and vraen I appeared at Ifib court" Mayriseh almost fainted. He asked for twenty-four hours’ postponement wh ch I granted. That afte • noon I went to the Governor’s office and the c erk told me Mayriseh had been there to appeal to the Governor and when he found I was acting Governor be was taken ill. • *The next morning when I got up-I could hardly open the door of my room, which swung outward, on account of the things Mavriseh had caused to be piled in the hall. There wero-alx do «m champagne, six do/.en beer,- 5,00() cigarettes, 500 cheroots, soda and brandy, aid a Turkish silk sh awl, which I gave ray sister as a wedding present, and other things. There was also a receipt in full for £Ji, signeihy Mayriseh.” “Of course you ac epted them as tokens of esteem,” said the man with tho Plug Hat. •‘Ail but the receipted bill, which I returned, nnd I paid him tho money,” said tae Pooh Bah of Port Said. ••What!’ c ied tho fat man aid the tall man together. Then they looked at emb other and sigheJ, and locking a ms they wandered out into the fog, leaving the man with the illustrious t<lo and the changer of SIOO bills together. Later met their estee nod confrere of the famouß headcaverlng, and behold! he wore a new overcoat. On its collar was the name in gold lei tecs, “E. A. Choriton.” It had telonged to the Pooh-Boh of Port Said, who had parted with it to the man with the Plug Hat during a social chat concerning an ancient game called poker.

Profits of Picture Collecting.

Mr. Seney vouches for the tr jfh of the statement that he rea'.iaed a round SIOO,OOO frottt from his latest picture sale. He was occupied for nearly six years in making the collection, and he has a right to boast of the intellectual delight he has realized from his venture, as well as its success from a purely commercial standpoint. Mr. Seney is of the opinion that if a man is abl6 to put $300,000 or In the com se of four or five years into paintings and then sell them at 20 or 25 per cent advance, he is doing an honorable business operation, and he Is getting his dividends in the investment every day in the delight ex peris enced in choosing the pictures.

An Archaeological Treasure.

A remarkable sto-e image has be°n found on the'l'uecarora Indian reser u tion. It was unearthed by Gen. Carrington while taking a census and investigating the tribe’s condition fort) e Government, and will be placed in the Smithsonian Institution at Washington. There is evidence that the mound from which it was taken is several hundred years old. The image itself is about 8 inches by 4 inches wide. The principal figu e stands with upturned face which is chiseled with far more skill than the red men generally posw sess. At one side, as if enfolded by the left arm of a parent, Is a smaller figure, quite indistinct. Underneath is some animal unm stakably the tail of a sheep. The whole at once suggests the stpry of Abraham’s preparations to offer up his only son Isaac in accordance with the commands of his God. “Down in the district of town known as Wall street.”a dis inguished r .ilroad off cial sa d recently, “a number of sturdy men move about on crutches 'i hey have all their arms and legs; their faces are as a rule the faces of men whose lives are not too hard; they do not sport the Grand Army buttons. If you watch them you 6ee that they do uot rely very greatly on their crutches; that the crutches, to be sure are always under the armß in the right positi n for use, but that they are used very seldom. One of the crutch beaters will stand'and talk to a friend, boluing the crutches entirely off the sidewalk, i nd will gesticulate with them violently; then starting on he w 11 let the foot of the crutch touch ground once in every three or four or half a do>en steps. These gentlemen are railioad cripples.’ men who are suing railroad companies for alleged damages; they go around with crutches so that they can swear on the witness stand w ithout too great a straining of their consciences that they were •on crutches for six months’ after the accident, on account of which they are suing.”—N. Y. Si n.

There are about 9,000 000 mortgages recorded in this country. The Chinese spend $200,000,000 annually in religious worship.. CHILDREN ENJOY The pleasnnt tiavo'\ gentle action and soothing efferts of. Syrup of Figs, when in need of a laxative, and if the father or mother be costive or bilious, the most gratifying results follow its use, so that it is the best family remedy known and every family should have a Loitle. THE HEIRESS’S DITTY. To England, to Engird, To buy me a lord ; Home again, home again. Bringing a fraud. BUILT THAT WAY. (Gentleman in Museum, looking at talking machine)—“Quite an invention ! ” Keefer—“ Yes, it speaks for itself." TWO WAYS OF CRIBBING. Patterson* l — “ Did you bar of that Kansas girl who got SSO for husking and cribbing sixty bushels o£->corn in five hours ?" Robinson —“ That’s nothing. There was a fellow in our townshio got six month’s board and lodging at the county’s expense by husking and * cribbing ’ only one busheL” In New York thtre is a sort of tulip craze. One lady just b fore lent came had 6,000 tuliDS in her halls anddrawng rooms, chietly red and yellow. The Grant monument fund in New York stands at $146,0 )0. The South is afiMuLL-Plenty qf strawberries North now. Steam is thick or thin, acc irding as it is hot or cold. New York will soon have a millionxiro club. It is occasionally frightfully hard to accept your own uoetiine. Gus. A. Dubois, a well known resident of t. Lou is fays: “l have used several buttles <>f Prickly Ash Litters for biliousness and malarial troubles, so prevalent in this cliinute, and heartily recommend it to all athicted in a like manner. It is the best remedy 1 ever used.” Ignoronce of the Jaw excuses no one—except the lawyer. We take pleasure in callin • the attention of ,our rend is to the mlvertisemuit of the (Jbcsebrough iVißmifucturinf; • oinpany, which ap pears in another column, 'this company arc th orainardiscoveiers ana only manufac ur> r of Vaseline, which is known all over the world 1 as the best emolient nd the most vain hie family remedy in use, Th. lr goods are sold bv druggists throughout the country, but we wish to caution. 1 ur readers when biiving, to accep. on •y ioods la origin'*! packaves and fabetedCTiese biougb Manufacturing Company, as. sometimes unscrunulo s dealers try to substitute preparations wh chare of little value when com ared wi h vaseilne, and some are injurious and unsafe to useBy sending the company a dollar by maP, he sender will receive free quile an assortment of these beautlfu' and vn wahte goods without any charge for delivery. We know whereof we write ivheu we *ay .the ’•Vuseliue” boap is a revelatlond ■ ~ “You can't be too car-full,” said the Superintendent to the new car driver. Biicuam’s Pills cures Sick Headache, Bronchitis is cured by freqnent a mal doses of Piao’a Cure for Consumption.

for (tire of . & c ..»ev Stiffness StujfecliS^esa

The Beauty Of It “Is that Hood's Sarsaparilla gives such perfect satisfaction,” writes a prominent druggist recently, after speaking of the large sales of this excellent medicine. We firmly believe there is nothing equal to Hood’s. Sarsaparilla to purify the blood and make the weak strong. If you have That Tired Feeling, or if your blood is impure take Hood’s Sarsaparilla. It is the best Spring Medicine. coming of winter as a constant state of siege. It seems as if the elements sat down outside the walls of health and now and again, led by the north wind and his attendant blasts, broke over the ramparts, spreading colds,pneumonia Who knows when the next storm may come and what its effects upon your constitution may be ? The fortifications of health must be made strong. SCOTT’S EMULSION of pure Norwegian Cod Liver Oil and Hypophosphites of Lime and Soda will aid you to hold out against Coughs, Colds, Consumption, Scrofula, General Debility, and all Alice mic and Wasting Diseases , until the siege is raised. It prevents wasting in children. Palatable as Milk. SPECIAL.—Scott’s Emulsion is non-secret, and is *w*seWlied by. the Medical Weo. session all over the world, because its ingredients are scienuucuily combined in su-a a manner as to greatly increase their remedial value. CAUTlON'.—Scott’s Emulsion is put up in salmon-colored wrappers. Be sure and get the genuine. Prepared only by Scott & Bowne, Manufacturing Chemists, New York. Sold by all Druggists. PAINLESS. Jr UULaS effectual^ ■o* WORTH A GUINEA A BOX. < For BILIOUS & NERVOUS DISORDERS B XS H Sick Headache, Weak Stomach, Impaired \ Digestion, Constipation, Disordered Liver, etc., > ACTING LIKE MAGIC on the vital organs, strengthening the <j muscular system, and arousing with the rosebud of health < The Whole Physical Energy of the Human Frame. C Beech am’s Pills, taken as directed, will quickly RESTORE \ FEMALES to complete health. £ SOLD BY ALL DRUCCISTS. > Price, 25 cents per Box. S B. JP. ALL EX tl Sol. Agents for United States, 365 & 367 CnwnLSf., JTevtt > York, who (if your druggist does not keep them) will mail Beeeham’s Pill* on \ p/^^rtce^uMjiyiiire/lrs;. jfjTl Cures where all else fails. Pleasant and agreeable to the ■gr taste. Children take it without objection. By druggists. HBB Indianapolis (Business University Old Bryant & Stratton School, North Pennsylvania St.. When Block, Opposite Post-Office. The DEMAND FOR ITS GRADUATES IS CREATER THAN THE SUPPLY, It stands at the head of Commercial Schools ; dutyear; enter any time; elective or prescribed course; individual instruction bv a large, strong faculty; lectures; time short; expenses low; complete facilities far BUSINESS, SHORT-HAND, ENGLISH TRAINING, ETC. Diploma tree at graduation; a strictly business school in an unrivaled commercial center; superior equipments, and unequaled in the success of its graduatCß; no charge for positions furnished. ELEGANT. ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE, F REE. HEEB & OSBORN. PropmbtobS.

A girl might have four strings to be beau and then not be able to keep him' quiet.

The Western Settler's Chosen Specific.

With every advance of emigration into the far Wes', a new demand is created for ■ ostcttei'e -"tomach Bitters, Newly peopled regions arc frequently 'ess salubrious than older s Hied locslities on account of ihe minsmt which rises from recently cleared land, particularly along the hanks of rivers that are subject to freshets. Ihe Hgricultural or mint g eu learns, when he does not already know, tnltt the Bitter< afford the only sure protection emtlost malaria and those dt-orders of the etomHcn, liver and bowe a. Id which climatic changes, exposure, and unaccustomed or unhealthy water or diet suhject him. Comeouentty be places a* esiiate upon thi* great nousebol i specific and preveif Irecom»iensurate with its intrinsic merit*, and Is careful to keep on h nd restora'lve and prom ter of health so Implicitly to be rel ed upon In time <1 need. Creates quite a stir-the teaspoon. If not above being taught by a man, take *hii good advice. Tr.v Dobbins’ Electric Soap next Monday It went cost tnuch. and you will then know for yourself jus how good it is. Be sure to get no imitation There ate lota of them. “Was the play spicy f” ‘‘Tha going out between acta was.” = A SLIGHT COLD, if neglected, often attacks the lungs. Brown’s Bronchial Troches give sure and immediate relief. Sold only in boxes. Price 20 cents. r*TM.-Ail Fits stopped free by Dr. Klin*'* Greet Nerve Restorer. No File ester ftret deyv ure. .Mar-, rollout cure*. Treatise end 82.00 trial -wittle frre to Vlt case*. Seed to Dr. Kliue.nai Arch 81., Phils.,Fa

ONLY IN THE PRIME OF LIFE.-It has been stated the most extreme age to which a chicken can live is abuut nine years, but any one who bas ever boarded knows better. This may bo a joke in boarding houses in general, but the fact still remains that Dr White’s Pulmnbarla is the best cough remedy in the universe. It cures coughs, colds, asthma, bronchitis, whooping cough and consumption. Everybody has a billioua attack on the first of the month. -VASELINE^ FOR A ONE-DOLI AR BILL lent ns br mal we will deliver, free of all charges, to any person In lII* United Mater, ell of the following articles,carefully pecked. One two-ounc* bottle of Pure Vaseline, - - to cts One two-ounce bottle of Vsseliu* Punade, - I) ’ One jer of Veeeline Cold Cream, - - - - 1.1 • One Cake of Vaseline Camphor Ice, - - - 10 ’ On# Cake of Veeelineßosp, unerented, - - 10 ’ One Cake of Veerline Soap.eii|iiieltrlvec*nted.2S ’ On* two-ounce bottle of Whit* Vaseline. - - 2* ’ 81.10 Or forpo stare stamp* any single article at the price named. On no arcunnt l.e persuaded to accept from your dr ur* let any Veeeline or prepare! iun therefrom u li leas labelled with our name. Lera use you will certainly receive eu imitation whiob ha* little or ou <w‘ehrm.rls MfrriT«».. SfsrtM Bf. N, V. nCMCI AM JOHN VV. ROhKIS II t IMdl V™ Unshlngtnn, D. C r Successfully Prosecutes Claims. I Late Principal Examiner U.B.Pension huiean yra in laet nar.lsnrijurtlcatlngchilms.atty tinea DA TCMTC F. A. LKHMANM I* A I CN I 9 Washington, DrO . Band Ist circnUr. 1

“August Flower” How does he feel ?—He feds cranky, and is constantly experimenting, dieting “himself, adopting strange notions, and changing the cooking, the dishes, the hours, and manner of his eating —August Flower the Remedy. How does he feel?—He feels at times a gnawing, voracious, insatiable appetite, wholly unaccountable, unnatural and unhealthy.—August Flower the Remedy. How does he feel ?—He feels no desire to go to the table and a grumbling, fault-finding, over-nice-ty about what is set before him when he is there —August Flower the Remedy. How does he feel ?—He feels after a spell of this abnormal appetite an utter abhorrence, loathing, and detestation of food; as if a mouthful would kill him— August Flower the Remedy. How does he feel ?— He has irregular bowels and peculiar stools— August Flower the Remedy. <]> SYKES’ - IE Cl The greatest emedy for CATARRH The large number of certificates received of the virtues of this preparation in toe U eat, men t of this unpleasant disease abundantly attest its efficacy, it is the only medicine now on the market adapted t* Catarrh, that performs what it promise* and effecis not only a speedy relief, but a permanent cure. Unlike many nostrums now before tl e public, it does net dry up t mporarily the nasal discharge ,but e> adC cat a the producing cause.thus 1< aving the system in a sound and heathy condition* Ask your druggist forabottleof Bykea* Sure Cure for Catarrh and Atmospheric Insuffiator, and you will be healed of th* malady. For sale by all druggists. Send for a free book to Dr. Sykes’ Sure Cure Co., Cincinnati, O. BUSS Goi>Do>, T.afayette, Ind. Wholesale A^ent. LADA A LTTE STOCK FARM. Importers of draft, Coach, Trotting and Pacing Stallions, General Purpose Jacks, English Shir., Clydesdale, Norman, trench Draft, iiuiubleluua. Royal George and Morgan. All breeds ol Cuuca horses. We have added thie year the German Oldea Burgh Coach horse. We keep in stock all kinds of Stallions, ages from 2to 7 years. We can suit an# one in want of a stallion at lower prices than any others. Companies wanting two or mure stallloM we will give good discount on regular price*. Par* chasers should do so soon, before our assortment i* broken. Every horse guaranteed to breed. Com* . or write ns. Lafayette Is 64 miles northwest from Indianapolis. CROUCH k TRAVIS. ISLAND HOME 1 Importer tnd BrVdwo ) f Per cher oo & Freno Coach jnpHHHffi sud of horses to teied r rom. I guarantee my I a jgEaMfiiSWß Stock, make prices i eaten. able and lellonrasyterm*. nHBf Visitor* always weloxnt Large eatatogije free. iTDf J.H.SKUITZ]| KCSIfirTiSW CouGH -BRONCHITIS. i CflTAßßit.]fc°?:^, S J; $2750 PER DAY Can be made easy by any energetto person sell tea ••CHAMPION PASTE STOVE POLISH.- Ne bru.b required. No hard labor. No dust ar dirt. Alwaya rrady far use. An art! I every housekeeper will buy. Xie.OuO packages sold In Philadelphia. Exclusive agency for one or more counties given competent pep eon. write to day enclosing stamp for parttea are. Top will never regret It. Addreas CHAMPION 00., 4* £ fourth St., Philadelphia, Pa. RC Tnu nalveraal fever a» Jfllm. corded TiLLUuiun’a IDOM Bocxd Cabbage gome trad* SO7/1 ii waK. me to offer aP. A Ganwd /ITOBLvLM Oalem. YM~ GUU ff/f f \ \Y\ keirna Tolntmdueeßaad nlDuI/W 1 m show lUeapaUliiirsl will pay in’ * ert from looare of seed abfck j -HI maiuer *> eta. Oatsw Iwuto r. Tllllnghapt, L*i Plump, Fa • WANTED, ■ ■■ rvluriea and Organlter* by an Ilf All I LU AMiemmeut Order Mytug tKXMIS VH in six niomhs at an estimated coat of *44 OS. WW Reputable men and women eas aeetire liberal compensation. Addreaa, M. MrINTYKn, Supreme niAuager, NO. ]U2d Arch Street, PhUadelphia. Pa. 1001 * Ties as. TAtOMk UVlafgUIT TACOMA. WAOM. a QTUU A DR TAm APTHMAUOnI MTe“.. I S.^TCURED^^M 08 TAfT UOt M CO .OOChitltl,N.l.g ItCB CAT ARA H' FREE U n I flit U V l.eadrrl.arh Co.. Newarfc.il, 3, II | llljpr.nd p. U. 0. A. man.Grander*, Labef LLIAIs uL Reformers, fire-aberhere. and latb maaap lete.eand for sampleeop? Joliet fill.l Have 1 111 is—,l ixurua