Rensselaer Republican, Volume 23, Number 28, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 March 1891 — Page 3 Advertisements Column 2 [ADVERTISEMENT]

JUSTOld Inhabitants— Why did St Peter send you down ? " Nbw Arrival—Because I am one of the men who invented toys that made » noise, for children to pity with. [And straightway they all fell on him and rent him to pieces.] EVIDENTLY NOT. Johnny —The cherubs have no bodies, have they ? Mamma—No, dear. JotfNNY —Then they never stub their toes. { THE HIGHEST THING ON RECORD. f Cumso —l tell you what the Chicagoans should have instead of a tower at the World’s Fair. Banks—What? r Cumso— A Western real estate boom. They could easily get one teller than the Eiffel tower. £• PURE CONTRARINESS. Rider—Why did Brown's horse balk, I wonder? Lyder—Brown was in a hurry to catch a train. f A TERRIBLE PROSPECT. CHOLLY trouble there always is about building monuments for great men ? Chappie.— Ya-as. If this sort of thing keeps on owah gweat men will positively wefuse to die. NEEDED ONE. CtJMSO —Do you remember that fellow Smith who stuttered so much ? Banks—Yes. Cumso—He has a habit of talking to himself Banks— Does he employ an interpreter? Feline Preserve*. Vest Share. “Mamcpa.’ 1 asked Benny Bloobump»r, “why do they preserve catsP” “What on earth do you mean?” 'T heard you tell Mrs. Garlick about putting catsup in bottles.” Arrangements have been completed tt Blackpool, England, for tbe erection if an Eiffel tower. The tower will be ibout 500 feet high, and will include lix platforms, with large halls for cn. iertainments and other purpose!..