Rensselaer Republican, Volume 22, Number 7, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 October 1889 — Page 6

TWO GUESTS. There are two guests which come to bless,' The one not than the other less la power and grace. Ope guest is love, and one is pain; Oh, open to the heavenly twain The inmost soul! Forget then, not where dwelleth love. Close in his sups sweet pain shall move With veiled face. If meekly borne, where grief doth dwell, Love in his holiest ro es as well Shall walk reside. ' And nevermore feel then surprise If love come wearing sorrow’s guise With eyes tear-wet. ..... Who knoweth one knows both; they blend As one to serve the same grand end— ? To lift the soul. Who knows not love how cm he feel The sharpest pang that grief can deal ? Who tastes not grief, how can he know The I alm love only can lestow! —Ella C. Drabble.

STRIKING A MATCH.

‘•Well, Miss Hildeburn, I must say I’m real sorry you and Mr. Songster have fallen out like that” “Oh, Mrs. Collins, indeed you are mistaken. There has been no ‘falling out 1 between Sir. Sangster and myself. Indeed, I am not on sufficiently sociaole terms with any of your gentlemen boarders to have a quarrel.” Saying which Miss Hildeburn, a slight, delicate-featured girl Of 18/ walked out of the room with even more than her wonted dignity of manner and c Triage. j “Nevertheless, notwithstanding,” pursued Mrs. Collins, resuming her i ironing, “I do believe there’s been a misunuerstandin’ between those two; | and a real pity it is; for he did admire her amazin’ly. He couldn’t conceal it Only they seldom know what is go-5d fbr ’em. and she's a lettin’ her pride stand in the way of her happiness now.” “Pride, indeed!'' sneered Mrs. Jane ' Humphries. Mrs. JCollins’ niece and assistant, a t .11. red-haired, stylish dressed damsel of five and thirty. “I I like to know what right a girl who earns her livin’ by givin’ music lessons at 50 cents an hour has to be proud; " and as for Mr. Sangster, I don’t believe ; he ever had a serious thought about her.” “La, Jane, I don’t know where your eyes kin be, if you didn’t see how fairly wrapped up in her he was about two weeks ago. He is a splendid young man, anyhow, and I’ll see if I can’t mend matters between’em. ” - “You’d better be mindin’ your own buiness, I think, Aunt, Martha,” said Miss Jane, with a spiteful laugh.” “Never you mind, Jane,” persisted the warm-hearted Mrs. Collins; “I’ll manage in some way. You say she’s afraid of ghosts, poor iamb!” The following evening the kindhearted Li nd lady tapped at the door of. the scantiy furnished fourth-story room occupied by Lucy Hildeburn; and from which now proceeded a melan-

choly strain. “Studying your piano at nights again? ’ querried Mrs, Collins reproachfully, when the young girl opened the door. “I am very busy just now, and must put all the time I can into study.” “Well, but you mustn’t forget what the doctor told you about overworkin' your brain,” said Mrs. Collins. “However,” she added, “I won’t detain you longer’n 1 kin help. I'm come to ask a favor. I’mgoin’ to the theatre this evenin’. So is Jane. So’s everybody in the house, I b'lieve; and the girl has gone to bed with a toothache. So I’m goin’lo ask you to give an eye to the furnace. I’ve just put on fresh coal and opened the lower doors; but ; will you please go down at & o’clock and close the doors?” “Certainly.” assented Lucy, upon which Mrs. Collins produced a lantern, saying: “Just take this down with you; the cellars all dark, you know.” Lucy took the lantern, closed the room door and returned to her piano, while Mrs. Cohins walked away, chuckling to herself. “That lantern’ll go out just five minutes after she sets it down, and she'll find herself all in the dark. And she’s afraid of ghosts, poor lamb. But what if somebody who ain’t a ghost should happen to be goin’ down there about the same time and be obliged to •trike a match to calm her fears?” And even while indulging in this pleasing reflection, Mrs. Collins tapped at a door on the second floor. Her summons was responded to by a pleasant-looking young man, who just now, however, wore a very dejected countenance. “La! Mr. Songster, I didn’t expect to find you home this evening.” I didn’t feel like going out to-night,” replied the young man in a weary tone. “Well, since you are going to be at home," said Mrs. Collins, “would you be so k nd as to look after the furnace? I’ve left the lower doors open, but I’ll be very much obliged if you go down at about 8 o'clock aqd close ’em. And you needn't t ke a light There’ll be one down there." Mr. Sangster readily promised to comply with the request, and Mrs. Collins went away, hopingforwhat she considered “the right results.” Meanwhile, poor Lucy Hildeburn. sitting at her piano, continued to draw forth such melancholy strains that the tears rolled down her cheeks. “I mud go away jfrom here,” she said, half aloud “I can’t bear it much longer; indeed. 1 can’t, seeing him day after day. loving him us 1 do, and knowing th t matters can never be adjusted between us. He is as proud us I—but, oh dear! what am I thinking of? It wants just two minutes to eight. I must go down and close the furnace doors.” Therefore she lighted the lantern and proceeded dotvn stairs. Ugh! WJf&t a chill draught was blowing in through one of the gratings! And there were strange noises all around. Juicy's heart thumped so violently •he was tempted to turn and run up stairs again.

: r But, goodness! The furnace was dreadfully, dangerously hot. I Lucy summoned up all her resolution, and, stooping down, closed the door.-. I They swung to with a bang, and' when she essayed to open them again she found the effort beyond her strength, . What was to be done in case of the fire needing more draught? She might after a while find it necessary to put on more coal, and that it would be well to put on more draught , But while she was debating with herself a much more serious mishap occurred, for the inside of the 1 intern suddenly achieved the most inexplicable somersault and she was left in utter darkness. Moreover, to complicate the miseries of her situation, she now heard stealthy footsteps descending the cellar stairs. Poor Lucy stood quite still, with her j hands clasped together over her heart. ' This was a burglar, undoubtedly, i He had seen all ’the male inmates of i the house going out and the lights lowered, and had thus chosen his opportunity to come in and conceal himself ' in the cellar. I The first idea that suggested itself to her was to creep under the steps and ’ remain there until Mrs. Collins’ re- 1 turn. Ere she had time to do this, however, a man's form became visible in the dim semi-twilight that was shed from the kitchen door above. I Lucy, with a desperate instinct of self-preservation, put up both hands,' exclaiming: / “Have pity on me! Oh, have pity and spare my life!” Upon this the burglar drew back, very much surprised. “Miss Hildeburn!” he exclaimed, as he struck a match. “What are you doing here, and how can I serve you?” Now poor- Lucy, completely unnerved and dreadfully ashamed of herself, sat down on a reversed coal scuttle and ; burst into a fit of weeping, . | Then Mr. Sangster knelt down beside her, and a confused interchange of explanations of various kinds ensued. The result was that at the expiration ' of half an hour Mr. Sangster took Lucy in his arms, and, kissing the tear-stain-ed face, murmured: “God bless you for this promise, my own darling!” j When Mrs. Collins came home two hours later the house was very quiet, the furnace in good order and neither Mr. Sangstermor Miss Hildeburn visible. But the following day Lucy confided to her a secret, and Mr. Sangster absented himself mysteriously for about three weeks. After that Miss Hildeburn also disappeared. “Gone to visit her aunt at Swathmore,” Mrs. Collins explained to the other boarders. But a fortnight later the carrier brought some wedding cards to the house. “It was all brought about through the furnace,” said Mrs. Collins, with a gleeful chuckle. But Miss Jane was infinitely disgust-' ed.—Chicago Evening Journal.

The Youngest Confederate Soldier.

Berry H. Binford, was the youngest soldier in the confederate array. His father, Dr. Binford, was a surgeon in the confederate army. The boy, when about nine years old, started out to find his father and reported to Gen. Wheeler, who took him for a federal spy sent in by some of the union people. The general kept an eye on the little’chap and finally turned him over, to Col. Josiah Patterson, who knew Dr. Binford and at once assumed the care of the boy. As he would not go back home, a pony was secured for hjm. a gun was sawed off the proper length, and he was recognized from that- time on to the end of the war as a soldier. It is stated that young Bin- 1 ford and another boy, not much older, undertook to do a little special service ouce. Thev went...£mt .between the lines somewhere up in North Alabama, threw up some small breastworks and awaited the advance of the feder.ils on the 1 opposite^side of a small river. The column came in sight, and the boys opened fire as if backed by an army, which the federals naturally supposed to be a fact. The boys h'Sid the fort a whole day. and when night came on they scampered off and rejoined their command several miles away. Binford w. s the famous “suspicious case” that caused a panic in this city last summer and subjected several distinguished physicians to a perfect avalanche of chaff, when it turned out to be a case of alcoholism instead of yellow fever.

He Made a Hit.

' Among the patrons of a certain American University is a Mr. M—•, who, besides being a generous, broadminded. although very illiterate merchant, is in high esteem in that seat of learning on account of tbe«eef*siderable financial aid he has from time to time furnished. At an alumni dinner ondO he was called upon for a speech, but declined. The guests would not be put off in that summary manner, and applauded until Mr. M was forced to get on his feet. With much confusion the orator began by saying: “My friends you know I was not a college man. Even now I don’t know whether the refreshment class comes previously before the sycamore class Or previously after, but ” The noise of mingled laughter and applause which followed drowned the conclusion of the sentence, and Mr. M. sat down, looking confused but smiling with the vague consciousness that he had made a “hit,” although he was not exactly aware of its precise nature.—Boston Advertiser.

Stamps In Paris.

If you are in Paris and desire a postage stamp, all you have to do is to go into a tobacco store and there you will find it. The tobacco stores are branch post-offices, so far as the sale of stamps are concerned. There, too, you can mail your letters if you desire to. Ail tobacco stores in I'rance are under the control of the government, as tobacco is, and it requires a government permit to open one, unless you are a burglar. Mr. Wanamaker oughl, to provide some way for getting a postage stamp easily in our large cities.

THAT WONDERFUL ELIXIR.

Bogsville Thrown Into a Fever of uxcita* I meat and Consternation. First Tried on an Old Hair Trunk and Then on an Aged and Infirm Pauner. Bogsville is in a state of excitement never before experienced by that community and the end is not yet A few weeks since Dr. Bitterweed commenced his . wonderful experiments with the Brown-Sequard Elixir and since then a perpetual Fourth of July celebration, with various embelishments, h is been in progress. The innocent lamb of rill stages and degrees, has been offered as a sacrifice and even the famous Ram of Bogsville, which never failed to give the passer-by a lift, has yielded up his life. i That the Doctor’s efforts may the better be understood wc append a few of his remarks delivered before such members of the Bogsville Scientific Society, as still possessed their sanity or yet retained sufficient age to remain out of their trundle beds after sundown. “I find,” remarked the doctor? “that the Elixir possesses various elements in keeping with the traits of the sheep, ere it has been reduced to mutton or worked up into this gre t rejuvenating remedy.. Hence, if a patient yearns for playful innocence we boil down a lamb. Should he desire simply to return to a condition of toughness and vigor wo introduce into his system the elements which made our patriarchal Ram of Bogsville a terror to all who I came within butting distance, A patient treated in this way gets as a ■ side- issue all tlie vim, stubbornness < and cussedness that characterized that . lately departed mutton. “Now, for the enlightenment of those who are regaining their’sanity i after a couple of weeks’ respite 1 will j make a resume of some of- the more important cases within my experience. I “Owing to the scarcity of volunteers for treatment a preparatory injection was administered to an old hair trunk which h;.d been in our family for generations. During the firsthalf hour-no symptoms were observed and a second dose was given just under the hotel label that was pasted on the end of the structure. Soon after it was seized by a constable on an attachement. There is little hopes of its recovery as my board bill is rather large.

UP TO 310 POUNDS.

“Next on the string was a pair of antique shoes that bad seen better days. Ten drops of the elixir was deposited in the toe. A cobbler assisted me. and his last efforts fully restored them. j “A pauper whose s inds of life had nearly run was brought me to build up. He was three score and ten and had an "extra score in nearTyevery barso much time to “hisTfunning i reduced, the reduction noted being from an avoirdupois of 310 pounds to that of 107 pounds in a period of five years, and so I gave him light-weight treatment. Three doses have built him up completely, in fact built him up to his original 310 pounds in weight. Through an oversight I forget to treat his clothes with the elixir and they remained their normal size until the patient reached about 200 pounds, then they ceased to be, bursting with a loud and sickening report. Having no credit at any clothing house, suitable garments could not be procured by him. He now appears in perfect health, and a blanket I was forced to furnish him.

HIS HEART FAILED HIM.

1 “A marriageable young lady desired to avail herself of the assistance of the remedy in helping her lover to express his feelings. He was apparently troubled with heart failure -his heart failed him whenever he attempted to propose. She thought that if possessed of the remedy a worn m’slntuition will direct her safely in subsequent proceedings. For convenience in applying, I fixed her up a line of fishhooks, each unprotected and individual point of which fairly oozed elixir, and bade her good luck when the proper time came. It came that.evening and with it came the coveted young man. He evidently meant business, (so she told me) and had folded her , to his breast for the two-fold purpose of getting the mastery of his weakness and also herself. In the language of

Claude Melnot'ehe poured forth his passion for her in hot, burning words, and had just rounded the last word in the prologue of his little drama when his heart failed himU During his recital this noble girl whose generous nature had pronipted her to such an heroic resolve had been busy in slipping her line of elixir fish hooks adown his back in readiness to help in the moment of need. It came. He gasped, he faltered, and *she pulled the Tine with a yank that showed true womanly revotion. For the full space of one second she waited for results. She was confident that the elixir could not fail, and as the m ny points tore their little furrows along the pathway of his , spinal column his speech returned. Three terrific yells smote upon the air ere he burst through the closed window to the garden below. Further particulars will be elicited in a breech of promise action which she lias instituted as an auxiliary to the elixir. ;

ALMOST SWIMMING IN IT.

Desiring to tone up a little in age and to appear a little nearer the prime of life he respited to the elixir—in fact his remit was rather "beyond the limits —and to his surprise it yanked him Back in years till it was doubtful whether he could votp at next election. With his return to youth appeared symptoms of big-headedness and when on the following day he was notified of his matrimonial freight Hardcash refused to accept the consignment, The bride, expectant, Jlmt smiled on him did soever a barrier of at least seventy years and it was on the grounds of too much “wear and tear” that he refused to accept this parcel of matrimonial sweets. The m trimonlal bureau promptly authorized the express agent to have all damages repaired at their expense, and feeling confident th it the elixir could rejuvenate the old girl they were married at once in order to utilize the wedding feast which would not bear postponement Then came the battle between the elixir i and tough old age in which the for- | mer was vanquished. She literally swam in the Brown-Sequard remedy but it didn’t phase her and our only reward was the withered smile of the bride of seventy years. The now youthful Hardcash tried hard to bask in her smiles but his basks were not a pronounced success. All grades of sheep were sacrificed in our mad endeavors at rejuvenation but the rejuvenescence that we looked for never came. Suddenly the. truth dawned upon me and my patient confessed that she was of the “She” family and for the last century had worked the Mutton-Brown-Sequard-Elixir racket upon herself with success. She had skipped back to sweet seventeen so often that the thing had almost grown monotonous but through the carelessness of her prescription clerk her last effort failed to drag her back to maiden- ' hood. She had now made up her mind that she was in for it. and further added that her darling Hardcash might i s well make up his mind that he was in and dispense with any foolishness about disparity of age for she had not buried her tenth husband without knowing how to properly manage that kind of property.”

A Fair Canoeist

A girl in a canoe is often of a pleasant afternoon one of the features of the Hudson, between upper New York and Yonkers, says a correspondent. The canoe is what woodmen would call a decked “bucktail,” being 26 inches wide by 10. - feet long, decked over at both ends and weighing probably not over twenty pounds. This cockle shell is one of the prettiest things afloat, withits thin sides of polished cedar and its bright-eyed oceup.mt seated on a scarlet cushion on its bottom. She. has scarlet ribbons on her sailor hatand a scarlet sash fastened about the waist of her dark-blue serge boating gown. A heavy silk skirt of dark blue and white stripes tops this, and as she wields the long double p iddle she skims the surface of the dimpling river with the lightness and birdlike motion that only a canoeist knows. She is an expert sailor lass, and her boat dips and ducks with all possible grace to steamer swells.

Progress.

When » fellow made a chase For, and got a salesman’s place, He thought it no disgrace In the days of long ago. Now he hustles like tarnation, And if he gets the station He “accepts” a situation, ♦ Don’t you know. —Binghamton Republican.

The Hog Driver Was a Senator.

Olive Hampton Smith was elected senator from Indiana in 1836. When the election was over, S mith, who was a good lawyer and had been in congress eight or ten years before, took a drove of hogs down to Ginctnnati going uu foot all the way. On the way he arrived at a tavern, covered with mud, unwashed and unshaven for m vny days. The crowd surrounded him, eager for news of the election. “Who’s elected senator? Hendricks?” ••No.” ••Noble?” ••No.” “Who then?” ‘•I am!” , There was a dead silence for a moment, and'then some .one asked, “Who are you?” A stump speech, with all tho mud still clinging to his clothes, was neo- ! es»ary to convince them of Ills right io the title of senator in the congress of tho United States. -■ -

ONE OF THOSE SCHENCKS.

There Were Plenty of Them and They Were a Jolly Lot. When the war of the rebellion broke but, Gen. Robert C. Schenck had been so long in public life and away from Ohio that he didn’t know, even by sight, half of the numerous nephews who were the sons of his half-dozen brothers. He was appointed brigadiergeneral, and it so happened that one of the regiments assigned to his brigade over in Virginia, was the Twenty-Sec-ond Ohio, commanded by Col. Alexander McDowell McCook. Several of the companies of this regiment were raised in and around Dayton, where the Schencks lived in sw.rms, and as the family was loyal all through, 7 there w.is a goodly number of Schencks in Company B and Company Fof that regiment. It so happened that the Schenck contingent in the regiment was thoroughly imbued with a love of fun; and when any mischief was afoot the Schencks were sure to h >ve a hand in it—if a party w s hauled up for discipline one or more Schencks was sure to be one of the number. This fact was very annoying to the general, as might have been expected, aud he did not try to conceal his annoyance. While the brigade lay near Fairfax Court House strict orders against foraging were issued; I believe it was even threatened to have foragers shot. Cue morning a party of five foragers, captured the uight before, was brought before Gen. Schenck for examination. The general looked at the faces closely, but recognized none, and then asktd the first man: “What is your name and regiment?” “Peter Brown, Second Ohio. Sir.” “Oh!” (in a relieved tone of voice) “I was afraid you might be one ot those Schencks.” “What’s your name?” he inquired of the njxt. The youth looked the general straight in the eye and answered cheerily: “Why, general, I’m one of those blank Schencks.” The officers standing by did not try to restrain their boisterous mirth, while Gen. Schenck glared furiously at the unabashed Buckeye youngster. In a moment he shouted to the officer of the guard: i “Take these scoundrels away; I will attend to them another time.” The culprits were marched off and the general had time to just get into his tent before he broke out into a prolonged fit of laughter.—New York Tribune.

PIKE’S PEAK.

Viewed From the Plains It is a Sight inspiring and Grand. Viewed from the prairies that lie to the east of its rocky slopes, Pike’s Peak stands like some grim sentinel watching over the vast extent of country from its base to the Kansas line, stoic-like, indifferent to the shifting panorama that has passed before it Could it speak, what a history it might unfold! What tragedies have been enacted in sight of its lofty summit! Over 14.0 W feet high, I it is, from its situ tion, standing'in the first range of hills, the first peak in Southern Colorado that greets the traveler coming from the east, and its sight has invigorated m nv a weary party in the d iys of overland travel, for at the giant’s feet were found, if not riches, at least sweet waters and The writer cannot better describe its appearance from the plains than by relating his experience when first seeing it. One morning as we reached the summit of one of those elevations, high but not abrupt, common to parts of eastern Colorado, we came suddenly in view of the range, many miles away at their nearest point; edoud-like but distinct they appeared through the intervening distance. Pike’s Pe <k, more than 'dlstanVTts summit crowned withUAnow. stood out againsfc-ffieekyTh-a grayish tint in the morning; in the evening it assumes a purplish hue apparently outlined in silver. The impression it gives one after crossing the dreary plains is inexpressibly grand. It»is only on a nearer approach that it presents that craggy and rugged aspect so characteristic of the Rockies. From its position Pike’s Peak is one of the most interesting as well as one of the most noted landmarks in the United States.

Salt For Moths.

For moths salt is the best exterminator. The nuns in one of the hospital convents have tried everything else without success, and their experience is valuable, as they have so much clothing of the sick who go there; and strangers, when dying there, often leave quantities of clothing, etc. They had a room, full of feathers, which were sent there for pillow making, and they were in despair, as they could not exterminate the moths until they were advised to try common salt. They sprinkled it around, and in a week or ten days they were altogether rid of the mo-hs. They are never troubled now. In heavy velvet carpets sweeping them with salt cleans and keeps them from moths, as particles of salt remain in the carpets and corners. Salt is not hurtfuttoanyone.Tind'hAS' no bad smell. Here is a little hint I add, which, perhaps, everyone does not know: For cleaning wash basins, b ith, etc., use the s me thing, common dry salt Rub a little of the salt with your fingers on the basin. Often a sort ofscutn is noticed in the basins in a marble washstand in the bath room: the salt takes it off easily and leaves the basin shinning and clean.—Philadelphia Press.

Two Plucky Girls.

A Belfast girl deserves comparison with the plucky Squirrel Island girl who, fulling from a yacht, sang out, “Luff her up. Cap’n, and i'll climb aboard!” A sailboat capsized in the harbor the other day and Mr. W. H. Howe went overboard. His llve-year-old daughter, standing on the bank, exclaimed: “Hold on, pupa! Stand right on your feet. I’m coming to you - as soon as I can get my shoes and stockings off,” and she proceeded to prepare to go to the rescue.

HUMAN FLESH-EATERS.

The Horrible Practices of Certain f British Columbia Indians. The British Columbia Indians havei been suspected of eating human flesh, says a Victoria correspondent of the New York Herald, but they have hitherto concealed their practices so carefully that no reliable white man is able to give personal testimony of the fact. Mr. Pocock has been spending a great , deal of time among them, and although he is not able to give personal testimoI ny of their cannibalistic rites, yet he has collected a great deal of evidence from natives of the prevalence .of the practice/ The Kwagutls, a tribe dwelling in the central part of the province, have a belief that if a man meets a certain spirit on the mountains he has a right thereafter ’during the winter dances, lasting two months of the year, to bite whoever displeases him. The spirit i» called Ha-mad-tsi and the cannibals who earn their horrible distinction by seeing him are known as Ha-mad-tsis. They belong to> what maybe<-ailoa 7 aii exclusive and aristocratic caste. Only I members of certain families, may become Ha-mad-tsis, and these when they come to the age of discretion go up into the mountains, where they meet the spirit. Having encountered this unlovely sprite they come back to the villages snapping and biting at every body and making themselves generally very undesirable neighbors. Their sole purpose is to show the tribe that they are different from ordinary, men. and do not care what they eat or what they suffer. In old times a captive or a slave was killed and presented to the initiated, who ate the corpse in the presence of a general assemblage of the people. More recently, although slavery is not wholly extinct, the Indians have become afraid to kill, so they are reduced to the stealing of corpses. Usually these have been drying for a long time, being “buried” among the branches of a tree, and are flavorless, the brains alone being considered a luxury. Up to the time of eating a corpse in public the acolyte, whenever he appears from the woods, bites indiscriminately, women being, however, generally exempt, whether from native gallantry or not does not appear. Formerly the faces were bitten, noses and ears especially, but now the cannibal merely lifts the flesh of a man’s arm with his teeth, which is sliced off with a knife by a by-stander while the half* insane savage retains his grip of it and finally swallows it. The father of the biter pays everybody who has suffered from his progeny’s enthusiasm from two to ten blankets. There are few men in the Kwagutl tribes who do not bear the scars of this extraordinary mania. The Ha-mad-tsi, during the progress of the whiter dances, is stark naked, a heavy plaited rope of cedar bark adorned with tassels being carried, however, on the shoulders. There are from three to twenty Ha-mad-tsis, and each of them will perhaps eat of four or five corpses in a life-time. Mr. Pocock, however, had one old gentleman pointed out to him who had partaken of twenty. At the same time the corpse is very frequently a sham one made up, for the purpose. Deer dr goat flesh is often tied to the human bones and devoured In the dusk, so that the onlookers are all deceived. Still there are no doubt well-authenticated cases of this species of emotional, ceremonial cannib.lism constantly taking place among these degraded savages in the interior. Mr. Pocock has not actually witnessed the ceremony, but he collected a considerable amount of testimony from what he considers reliable native witnesses.

Where Jersey Lightning Is Produced.

The great applejack-producing belt of the country lies between the Hudson river on the east and Delaware river on the west, says a Middletown -iattiaF to "fKß7Ne«r__YhniL Sun, and is pretty much comprised within the bounds of Orange counties, New York, and Sussex and Warren counties, New Jersey. Within this district are some fifty distilleries devoted exclusively to the manufacture of the fiery spirit known upon the United States internal revenue returns as apple brandy, but commonly called applejack. Ordinarily, when the apple crop of the region is fair to good, the distilleries start up when the fruit begins to ripen early in September, and are kept running until the crop is exhausted, say about the Ist of January following. Some of the distilleries turn out a largo product The biggest apple-brandy distillery in the country is at Warwick, Orange county, and has turned out in the course of a good season 13,000 gallons. The product of the entire district in a prolific apple season will reach near 200,000 gallons, on which an internal revenue tax of SIBO,OOO is paid.

Artemus Practically Jocese.

Payson Tucker was in his younger days a companion of Artemus Ward, and tells many a good story about him. Here is one that the railroad manager related to ex-Governor Plaisted at the Twin Mountain House the other day. Artemus was out very late one night a nd- came home i n TFxtrfvfiif snow storm. The family had retired. Artemus went around the house and threw snow balls at his brother Cyrus’ window, shouting for him to come down quickly. Cyrus appeared in haste and „ stood shivering in his night clothes. “Why don’t yoacome in, Charles? The j “I could have gotten in all right I called you down because I wanted to ask you if you really thought it wrong to keep slaves.”—Lewistown Journal,

A Mistaken Idea.

“When a husband gets the idea that he is a lord of creation, and his wife is the ground he walks on, he can’t make a good husband,” said a Cincinnati judge the other day. “It is my experience, in hearing proceedings for divorce. that the average husband considers the average wife only a peg above his domestic, and that his lordly Will must be obeyed" Or sho ishlade to suffer for it” Susan 8., whore are you ? Do you hear that?