Rensselaer Republican, Volume 21, Number 43, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 June 1889 — Josh Billings’ Philosophy. [ARTICLE]

Josh Billings’ Philosophy.

New York W, ekly. Thoze folks who are trieing to get to heaven on their kreed will find out that they hain’t got a thru ticket. One ov the most reliable cures for love, now days, seems to be to get marrid. -It takes longer to do nothing than it duz to finish most jobs. Two-thirds ov what iz called kontentment konsists in having plenty ov money at interest, and other things to match. I would rather see a man resolute, even if he iz wrong, than to see him uncertain, aftho he is right. Most people are polite, not so mutch from any partiklar goodness of heart, as from a vanity to be called polite. Folks are not often obstinate bekauze they are right, but bekauze they are wrong. Thare are very phew persons comparitively who are remembered after they are ded for their virtews. Fame iz too often made out ov the cheapest materials. Watching one’s helth all the time iz one ov the wust diseazes we can hav; besides, thare iz no cure for it. Pride iz the mother ov Envy. Thare are but phew people that yu kan praze without flattering them: The most dangerous examples are thoze which hav az much good az evil in them; they are az dangerous az the kandel to the moth. We really only luv those whom we think are inferior to us. The harte has too much pride in it to very grateful for ennything. Tht reazon whi we are generally ungratephul for grate favors iz bekauze we think we hav got all we kan get. Thar iz a grate deal ov virtew that iz like munny—safe so long az it iz kept under lek and key. Most people overshoot the mark, but it iz a respektabel miss to make. Thare iz very little advice that iz ever followed. Prosperity iz like wine—large doses ov it are pretty sure to reveal a man’s true karakter. He whom adversity makes reckless prosperity would certainly ruin.