Rensselaer Republican, Volume 21, Number 3, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 September 1888 — MOTHERS AND MANNERS. [ARTICLE]

MOTHERS AND MANNERS.

Little Ones ShouldT>e Surrounded i by an Atmosphere of Kindness. Boston Globe. ' - There is no denying the fact that American young folks are about the brightest in the world. Pretty, precocious and sffTf-confident, it would be hard to find their equals for what we call “cuteneßS.” But, though' their cleverness is unquestioned, it must be admitted that many of them are anything but patterns of propriety, particularly in the domestic circle. Indeed, for disrespect to parents and elders generally, our young people, or at least very many of them, are a by*word and a reproach. It is a melancholy but ‘‘true” fact that children’s manners are at a low average in this country. And the worst of it is, that United States youngsters commit their atrocities of impoliteness and selfishness with such a good grace. They actually patronize their parents. What is more, their parents “stand it.” And that’s where all the trouble lies —with the parents. And especially with the mothers, so few of whom know where to draw the line between judicious and injudicious kindness. Children are encouraged to be “smart” and irreverent. Their cute sayings are quoted before them, and their self-importance flattered, till they become nuisances to everybody, and most of all to those who love them most, their mothers. It is bad enough for a fond father to know that hi? first born playfully refers to him as “the guv’nor” or the “boss;” but how sharper than a serpent’s tooth for a doting matron to ' hear her darling coolly call her “the old woman.” Yet whom has she to blame but herself? The mother w'ho allows a child to speak rudely or disrespectfully to her a second time deserves all the trouble that comes of it. Children are, like monkeys, natural mimics. They do as they see others do. The best safeguards against rudeness and disrespect are courtesy and kindness. Let the little ones live in a perpetual atmosphere of politeness. Let them be taught that if there be any choice, their best manners are to be kept for home consumption and their surplus of politeness laid by for strangers. But there need be no apprehension on that score. A boy who is considerate for his mothers and sisters is sure to be considerate for others. Whoever sees a young man thoughtful for women and children, always on the lookout to do a kindness to the old, the sick, the weak, but. thinks: “Ah! he had a good mother.” And the converse is true. A badly brought up and boorish boy is bound to reflect discredit on the one who bred him. Many a good woman makes a bad mother. Her very love makes her wrong both herself and her child. The victims of a mistaken kindness are legion, and the sad thing is that the children of such mothers, while they love, frequently live to half despise their weakness. This is an age of restless activity, of what is called “go,” and, in the struggle for supremacy, manners are only too apt to be forgotton by both young and old. The great trouble with boys—and with men, too, for that matter —is that they make the big mistake of thinking that gentle wajrs and polished manners make a boy “namby-pamby;” that they are dll well enough for women and girls, but that the sterneßisex has no use for them. Let them remember that courtesy is the very flower oLchivalry, that — ■' .The bravest are the tenderest, The loving are the daring. \ It rests mainly with the mothers to enforce, both by precept and example, the beauty and the necessity of courtesy. Children who are always accustomed to a proper courtesy and a well-considered kindness naturally take on those graces of manner which are to life what the perfume is to the rosg* what the smile is to the human face divine. Let the mothers remember that by heir children they themselves are known. Let them so surround the little one with sweet and gentle influences that rude speech shall be as impossible to them as a strange tongue. And, above all, let them remember that true politeness means tact, taste, kindliness, and that these in their broadest sense mean morality.