Rensselaer Republican, Volume 20, Number 38, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 May 1888 — Page 2

THK SHADOW CHABKR With outotMtobcd banda hewwhta child joya flee. Aed reaiih with the p»Min< of th. day, Like ship, that keep their mum far oat at aea. Nor heed the lonrtmt. watcher. In the bay, and glad youth found him following ardent-eyed, The Deeding phantom that tie ever lo«t, ▲nd all hta eager manhood was denied The aweet reward ouch weary Marching coat. Theft came at laat Lt'c’a lord, aweet Death, and said, "Oh, loyal heart, well done, behold thy wage." And lot—with fadelew beauty overepreadThe shadow of his childhood, youth and age.

A NEAT JOB.

A Burglar’s Stary., ' . Chicago Inter Ocean. My profession isn’t a popular one. There’s considerable prejudice against against it. I don’t myself think it’s much worse than a good many others. However, that’s nothing to do with my story. Borne years ago, me and the gentleman who was at that time connected with me in business — he’s met with reverses since then, and at present isn’t able to get out—was looking around for a job, being at that time rather hard up, as you might say. We struck a small country town—l ain’t a'goin’ to give it away by telling where it was, or what the name of it was. There was one bank there; the President was a rich old duffer; owned the mills, owned the bank, owned most of the town. There wasn’t any other officer but the Cashier, and they had a boy who used to sweep out and iuu of errands.

The bank was on the main street, pretty well up one end of it —nice snug place; on the corner of a cross street, with nothing very near it. We took our observations, and thpre was no trouble at all about it. There was an old Stoughton bottle of a watchman that walked up and down the street nights, when he did n’t fall asleep and forget it. The vault had two doors; the out-side one was chilled iron and had a three-wheel combination lock; the inner door wasn’t no door at all; you could kick it open. It didn’t pretend to be nothing but fireproof, and wasn’t even that The first thing we dene, of course, was to fit a key to the outside door. As the lock on the outride door was an old-fashioned Bacon lock, any gentleman in my profee sion who chances to read this article will know just how easy that job wes, and how we done it. I may say here that the gentlemen in my line cf business, having at timrs a good deal of leisure on their hands, do considerable reading, and are particularly fond of a neat bit of writing. In fact, in the way of literature I have found among’em—however, this being a digression I drop it and go on with the main job again. This was our plan: After the key was flitted I was to go into the bank, and Jim—that wasn’t his name, of course, but let it pass—was to keep watch on the outride. When any one passed he wcs to tip me a whistle, and then I doused the glim and laid low. After they got by I goes on again. Simple and easy you see. Well, the n'ght as we selected the President happened to be out cf town—gone down to the city, as be often did. I got inride all right, with a slide lantern, a breast driD, a small steal jimmy, a bunch of skeleton keys, and a green baize bag io stow the swag. I fixed my light and rigged my breast drill, and got to work on the door right over the lock. Probably a great many of your readers is not to Well posted as me about bank iccks, and, I may say for them, that a three-wheel combination lock has three wheels in it and a slot in each wheel. In order to unlock the door you have to gat the three slots opposite to each other at the top or the lock. Of course if you know the number the lock is set on yon can do this, but if you don’t you have to depend on your ingenuity. There is in each of these wheels a small hole, through which you put a wire through the back of the lock when you change the combination. Now, if you can bore a hole through the door and pick up those wheels by running a wire through thoee holes, why you can open the door. I hope I make myself clear. I was boring that hole. The door was chilled iron, about the neatest stuff I ever worked on. I went on steady enough; only stopped when Jim—which, as I said, wasn’t his real name —whistled outside, and the man watch to tt lad by. By and by when I got pretty near through, Jim, so to speak, whistled again. I stopped, and pretty soon I heard footsteys outride, and I’m d—, I mean plowed—if they didn’t come right up to the bank steps, and I beard a key in the lock. I was bo dumbfounded when I heard that that you could have slipped the bracelets on me. I picked up my lantern, and I*ll be hanged if I didn’t let the slide slip down and throw the light right onto the door.and there was the President. Instead of calling for help, as I supposed he would, he took a step inride the door, and shaded his eyes with his hand and looked at me. I knowed I ought to knock him down and cut out, but I’m blest if I could, I wag that surprised.

“Who are you?” says be. “Who art you?’' says I, thinking that was an innocent remark, as he commenced it, and a-trying all the _ time to collect myself. “I’m the president of the bank,” says he, kinder ahcrt “Something the matter with the lock?’’

“By Georgil” The idea camo to me then. “Yes, sir,B says I, touching my cap. “Mr, Jennings, he telegraphed this morning the lock was out of order and he couldn’t get in, and I’m come on to open it for him.” “I told Jennings a week ago,” says he, he ought to get that lock fixed. Where is hot” “He’s been a-writing letters, and he’s gone up to his house to get another letter he wanted to answer.” “Well, why don’t you go right on?” says be. “I’ve got almost through,” says I, “and I didn’t want to finiahnp and open the vault till there was somhody here.” “That’s very creditable to you." says he. “A very proper Sentiment, my man. “You can’t," he gess on, coming round by the door, “be too particular about avoiding the veiy suspicion of evil’’ “No, sir," says I, kinder modest like. “What do you suppose is the matter with the lock?” says ,he. I rather think it’s little wore on account of not being oiled enough. These ’ere locks ought to be oiled about once a year.” 1 ‘ Well,” says he, “you might as well go right oh, now I am here; I will stay till Jennings comes- Can’t I help you? Hold your lantern, or something of that sort?”

The thought came to me like a flash, and I turned around and taya: • “How do I know you’re the President I ain’t ever seen you afore, and you may be a-trying to crack this bank for all I know.” “That’s a very proper inquiry, my man?” says he, “and shows a most remarkable degree of discretion. I confess that I should have thought of the position in which I was placing you. However, I can easily convince you that it’s all right. Do you know what the President's name is?” “No, I don’t,” says I, sorter surly, “Well, you’ll find it on that bill,” said he, taking a bill out of his pccket, “and you see the same name on these letters,” and he took some letters from his coat. I suppose I ought to have gone right on then, but I was beginning to feel interested in making him prove who he was, so I says: “You might have got them letters to put up a job on me." “You’re a very honest man,” says he, “one among a thousand. Don’t think I’m at all offended at your persistence. No, mv good fellow. I like it, I like it,” and he laid his hand on my shoulder. “Now, here,” says he, taking a bundle out ot his pocket, “is a package of $lO,000 in bonds. A burglar wouldn’t be apt to carry those around with him, would he? I bought them in the city yesterday, and I stopped here to-night on my way home to place them in the vault, and, I may add, that your simple and manly honesty has so touched me that I would willingly leave them in your hands for safe keeping. You need not blush at my praise." ' " I supposo I did turn sorter red when I see them bonds.”

* “Afifyou satisfied now?” said he, I told him I was thoroughly, and so I was. So I picked up my drill again and give him the lantern to hold, so that I could see the door. I heard Jim, as I call him, outside once or twice, and I like to have burst out laughing, thinking how he must be wondering what was going on inride. I worked away and kept explaining to him what I was a-try-ing todo. He wasvery much interested in mechanics, he said, and he knowed as I was a man up in my business by the way I went to work. He asked me about what wages I got, and how I liked my business, and said he’d took quite a fancy to me. I turned around once in a while and looked at him a setting up there as colemn as a biled owl, with a dark lautet n in his blessed hand, and I’m blamed if I didn’t think I should have to holler right out. I got through the lock pretty soon, and put in my wire and opened it. Then he took hold of she door and opened the vault. “I’ll put my bonds in,” says he, “and go home. You can lock up and wait till Mr. Jennings comes. I don’t suppose you will try to fix the lock tonight?” ' ... I told him I shouldn’t do anything more with it now, as we could, get in before morning“Well, I’ll bid you good night, my man,” says he, as I swung thedoor, to again- « r

Just then I heard Jim, by name, whittle, and I guested the watchman was a-coming up the street. “Ah,” says I, you might speak to the watchman if you see him, and tell him to keep an extra lookout to-night” “I will,” says he, and we both went to the front door. y “Tnere comes the watchman up the greet,” says I. , “Watchman, this man has been fixing the bank lock, and I- want you to keep a sharp lookout to-night. He will stay here until Mr. Jennings’ return.” “Good night againsays he, and we g hook hadds and he went up the street. I saw Jim, so-called, inthe shadow on the other side of the street, as I stood on the step with the watchman. “Well,” says I to the watchman, ‘TU go and prek up my tools and get ready to go.** . .'A ' '■ 1 went back into the bank, and it didn’t tike long to throw the door open 'and stuff them bonds into the bag. I There was some boxes lying around and ’ a —fa, «*T should rather hare liked to

tackle, but it seemed like tempting Providence after the luck.we’d had. I looked at my watch and seen that ft' was just 12:16. Thera was an express went through at just 12:30. I tucked my took with the bag on top of the bonds and walked out at the front door. The watchman was on the steps. “I don’t believe I’ll wait for Mr. Jennings,” fays I. “I suppose it will be all right if I give yop his key.” “That’s all right,” says the watchman. “1“ “I wouldn’t go away from the bank very far,” says I. “No, I won’t says ne, “PH. stay right about here all night.” “Goodnight,” says I, and I shook hands with him, and me and Jim, which wasn’t his right name, you understand, took the 12:30 express, and the best part cf that job was we never heard nothing of it. It never got into the papers.

TRADE AND LABOR.

Philadelphia Record. The Furniture-workers’ Union of San Francisco has adopted a label to be placed on union-made articles. A planing and lath-mill, with a daily capacity of 50,000 feet, is to be removed from Michigan to A rmietead. Miss. Non-union men of Hamilton, Ont, have formed the Independent Workingmen’s Association, with fifty members. The Saloon-keepers’ Progrersive Union of Baltimore has been admitted to membership into the Federation of Labor. A Hadley, Mass., thread company is putting in 6,400 new spindles, which will increase its production 25 per cent . —r— The Coopers’ Union, of New York, is to establish a co-opeative ccoper shop in connection with the co-operative brewery. The Warwick China Company’s factory, at Wheeling, W. Va., will be in operation in a few day?. It will employ over 200 persons. Many ot the master pa'nters of Toronto, Canada, have granted the demand for twenty-two and a half cents an hour and a nine-hour day. Unlicensed ’ plumbers in Brcokljn cannot obtain material, because of a deal between the master plumbers and the dealers in plumbers’ material. The largest wood ale oho)-works in the wcrld are at Calera, Ala. The waekly output is 20,000 bushele of charcoal and 700 gallons of alcohol. A Warrensburg, Mo., company with a capital of SIOO,OOO will mine soal, fireclay, iron and lead, and manufacture fire-clay goods, sewer pipe, drains, tiling, etc. - ' The Detroit Free Press has estimated the number of men- employed at iron mining in the L ke Superior basin at 160,000. Wages were reduced from sto 10 per cent, on Feb. 1, Miners gst $1.65 a day. '

A Well-Kept War Secret.

Springfield (Mass.) Union. Professor George B. Wileox, of Chicago, reveals in the Congregationalist a well-kept secret of our lace war. He says that the purchase of Alaska from Russia by the United States Government in 1867 was really not for the acquisition of more territory, but was for the purpose of paying a debt of the war which President Lincoln and Secretary Seward contracted. At the time. duHng4hg_ was, when it looked as though England and France were going to take hold and help the Confederacy in earnest, President Lincoln secured from Russia a fleet of war vessels to help d efend our porta and assist in maintaining the 7 blockade of the rebel ports. The presence of Russian veeseis off some of our harbors was ar mystery at the time, and they depart ed as mysteriously as they came. Their departure was due to the fact that the apprehended danger from England and Fiance did not materia’ire, and then the question arose how Russia could be compensated. President Lincoln had used his war power freely, and Congress had backed him up, but here was a bill for millions, and he feared that be would be criticised for incurring it, although it was a wise thing to do when he did it. While the President was hesitating how to get at it, the war closed and the President was assassinated, and Mr. Seward was left te solve the problem. Russia wanted the money, but she appreciated the situation and waited patiently. Finally the project of getting Congress to authorize the purchase of Alaska was hit upon and the $7,200,000 that we paid Russia for Alaska was really in payment of the fleet bill, and Alaska was thrown in. The secret iwas so well kept that General W. T. Sherman heard of it for the first time in Russia, and he kept the story to himself until a recent army reunion. Secretary Seward must have shared with some of the Congressmen his secret of the real reason why he wanted Alaska bought at a time when the United States Government needed money more than territory, but if he did they guarded wellhis confidence; The complete history cf our late wards yet to he written, and generations yet to come wid read with wonder and with admiration of the consummate ability displayed by President Lincoln and his Cabinet no less than of the marvelous patriotism and coprage that were displayed on land and sea by army and navy. - ■ Onenight lastweek Jack Smith, ol Eustis, Fla., killed five possums at one ’shot

FARM AND HOME.

•Aar xAißiM# ex au rxxit. Fretn a book recently published in this city, entitled “Home Fishing and Home Waters,” And writtenby that excellent authority on fish culture, the Hon. Seth Green, we take the following paragraphs on the subject of carp culture: He says: To construct a pond, first stake, off your lapd- the desired dimensions; then take a plow and scraper, and with them make the necessary excavation., The pond should be five or six feet deep in the center, gradually sloping up to the edges. The object in having the pond deep in the center is to provide the fish with a place to settle into during the winter; without danger of the water freezing solid and thereby killing them, as would be the case in to'd climates if the water was al) shallow. The reason for having the bottom eloping is, that thereby the fish may have access to plenty of warm, shoal water, and a’so, that incase the old fish are not taken out after spawring, the young will have the protection of the shallow water along the edges, into which the larger fish cannot swin if they should feel inclined to make a meal on some of their younger relatives. The outlet should be about three feet wide, and so constructed that it can be well screened to prevent the fish from escaping, and co as to admit cf the water being drawn off when it is desired to remove the fish or to cleanse the pond. The screens may be made of wire netting, and painted with gas-tar mixed with one-third turpentine, or to the consistency of paint, and applied with an ordinary paint brush. . The wire netting should be tacked to strong wooden frames, made to fit the space to be screened. To screen a carp pond effectually, three screens of different sized meshes should be used. These should be taken out easily and cleaned. The coarser screen should be placed first, or nearest to the pond so as to catch the principal part of the drifting matter, and prevent the clogging of the lower and finer screens. About eighteen inches back of the cereens the outlet boa*ds should be placed, fitted to s'ide iu a groove. Tney should be about six inches wide each, and made to fit closely, as it is by these that the overflow is regulated. It is advisable to have the top boards narrower than the lower ones, so that the water may be raised or lowered to any level desired. If galvanized wire—which is the best, although more expensive—is used for screens, it need not be painted with gas-tar. For a pond containing large carp only, the outlet screen may be made of slats about three inches wide, with half inch openings the slats. Isa leaf strikes against slats of this width it will pass between them without obstructing the flow cf water, as it can not lap around them, as it would do if the slats were smaller. In all; cases the screens should extend nearly to the bottom ofjthe pond, so as to present as great a surface as possible. Carp can be raised in well water, but water from a brook is preferable. They will succeed in the northern States, if the ponds are deep enough not to freeze to the bottom in winter. Carp do not require feeding in winter, as they burrow into the mud or hibernate, until the ice disappears in the spring.

» THK SOTAL PLANT. —Ajagy, food for stock fit considerable favor in the Southwest iS tfaw wotal plant. It is found to ba especially good for feeding sheep. The plant belongs te the'aloe, and it is found growing in very large quantities over the plains of western Tex is. It also grows very extensively in northern Mexico. In appearance this plant resembles that known as bear grass, the leaves being from eighteen inches to two feet in length, and the edges have a hooked thorn. These leaves put out from or crown a bulb, like a pineapple or kohl rabi, which is on or above the ground, and is from a foot to two and one-half feet in diameter. This bulb is the part that the stock eat, and is very nutritious, containing a large percentage of saccharine matter. The Mexicans make an alcoholic liquor from it, known as mescal de sotal, and which is one of the moet fiery of the many fiery beverages of that country. To feed it to sheep, a man starts out ahead of the flock and with an ax splits open these .bulbs, and the sheep follow and gnaw out the center. In three or four months sheep will get hog fat on sotal, which is as good in winter, when there is no grass, as in summer and possibly better. Cattle are fed in tbe same manner. Of course there is a great waste, for when once cut open the plant is silled, in which respect it differs from the cactus plant, which propagates from a leaf dropped on the ground. But for thousands of square miles the sotal literally covers the ground, and will feed hundreds of thousands of sheep and cattle, and will last into the incalculable future. Sotal and cactus only a few years ago were considered encumberers of the land, and now they are important factors in successful stock raising and feeding, in southwest Texas. THK YANKKX VABM HAND. An exchange gives the years ago, but now seldom seen. This was the Yankee farm-hand. The writer sayk “Whatan institution he used te beiuthe days when we were young A thoroughbred Yankee; not a drop of imported blood in his veins; strong and'

lithe aad active and tine leas---intelligent, fairly well educated, skilled in hie hush nees, and, as a rule, industrious beyond the belief of this ten-hour generation. From the time he drove his ax into the woodpile in the door-yard on the Ist of April until the close of the season, after baveeting, he expected to work, and he did work, not from sun to sun, but from dawn to darkness, and then did the milking and fed the pigs afterward. His day was fourte n, fifteen, even sixteen hours long, and it never occurred to him that it should be shorter. He was no speeialist. He could do anything. He was tmart with a scythe, handy with a hoe, cute with a cradle, and experienced with an ax. He knsw how much grain and grass seed was required to the acre, when gras was fit to cut, and when it was hayed enough to “goin." and hedid net need to be told when to drop tuin'p seed in the oom field, or how to put corn in the ( hock. He could build wall, make cider, shingle the barn, make a hay-rack, or doctor a rick hog. It was safe to leave him to work alone. And he got for bis service $lO. sl2, possibly sls for eight months and caved threefourths of it. Then when he had worked eight or ten seasons and accumulated a few hundred dollars, he probably married the “hired girl,” who had been at work for a dollar a week and saved half of that, bought a farm, got out of debt little by little, educated his cbi'dren and sent them to the city to preach or practice law or work iu the s‘ora or shop, while he stays on the old homestead and sees it grow up to bushes.”

WHAT WELL-DRESSED MEN WEAR.

Square-cornered cuffs supersede all other varieties. . ' Pale primrose or lavender kid gloves are again en regie for evening wear. Washable pique braces are an indispensable adjunct to cool summer coetumes. French gray, blue, and elate trousers are not only popular, but, in fine goods, handsome. The tendency in umbrellas is to fine light frames ani nicely finished handles that on fair days may need ss walking sticks. New cheviots for trousers are out in bulk. A neat gray or brown check or stripe is a good selection if the coloring is not to loud. Almost as broad an expanse of shirt front is now shown with morning dress as one used to see with an old-fashioned high-cut clawhammer. A number of swells have lately made up what is known as “Raining in London” trousers. They have the bot'oms neatly turned up and stiched in place. A new stand-up collar has not onlv bent pointe, but a half-inch of its entire upper rim is reversed outward to prevent chafing of the 2 neck in warm weather. A delightfully soft and silky new stuff for fancy eoating is called “Angora.” It comes in checks, stripes, and mixtures of several shades, broken with a hairline of a third color, generally red. New cotton hose, says an exchange, have rainbow ankle stripes on a tan ground, with ribs and feet of darker shade, while lisle thread show maltese cresses on a mode or black grounds. “Lounging" jackets are made in various light cloths. A handsome Scotch mixed tweed is thus utilized with effect. Most of these are made witu four or five bu ttons-, which are not used, and a long rolling collar. The correct trouser is eighteen and a half inches at the knee and from seventeen and a half to eighteen at the bottom for average height. This is called the peg-top style and measurements may be suited to individual build. The swallow-tail coat has undergone some slight 'alteratioa. Thera is now no longer any stitching or binding on the edge. The sleeves are larger, to admit of carrying the handkerchief, which is no longer worn inside the vest.

A PLAY ON WORDS.

“Solon” was probably a parting salutation among wise men.—Texas Siftings. A railroad man is no more liable than any other man to have carbuncles—New Orleans Picayune. Mr. P.ckles is a candidate for lieutenant Goveinor of He will make a sharp campaign —San Francisco Alta. A sporting man c6n never see a comet without waiting to go one better.—New Orleans Picayune. All sluggers are not alike, but one bears a striking resemblance to another. —New Orleans Picayune. A landed proprietor may not be praud of his broad acres when his teeth ache? —New Orleans Picayune. Abe Lizard is a candidate for office in Missouri. He may prove a blizzard to his opponent.—San Francisco Alta.

The Soudanese Slave Trade.

Lord Salisbury was called upon yes terday by a deputation of members of the House of Commons and others, who asked the government to protect trading and suppress-slave dealing in the Soudan. The premier explained that there were only two alternatives—withdrawal from Suakim, which would mean the dominance of Osman Digna and the slave I rade, or the continuance of the Egyptian flag at Scakim. An English protectorate, he raid, could not be thought of. The government sympathiaid wfth the aims of the deputation and would advice the Egyptian government to the best of its ability.

STRIKING A BARGAIN.

The Way They Do It in That Thriving Town of Detroit. t Detroit Free Preea. This is the way they do business at the cross roads’ store, where they have plenty of time for it. The system has not yet gone into effect in the large dry goods emporiums of the cities. Old lady in pick “slat" supbennet and a gown made of five and a quarter yards of calic) enters, adjust? her glasses and looks at the threepieces of gingham on the shelf. “Anything I -can show you to-day, Mrs. Skinner?" asks the proprietor, coming forwtrd with his mouth full of pickles and cheese. :r —t“I dunno,” says Mrs. Skinner. “Got a fine line o’ ginghams Just in,” “I dunno but I might look at ’em. No charge for that, I reckon.” “Ob, no, of course not Now, here’s a mighty fine pisoe o’ green and red plaid.” “I dunno as I like plaid.” “Well, here's a blue ani white check.” “I hadn’t crl’lated on gittin’ a check.” “Well, now here’s a green and white piece” “Ive so many green and white ginghams, I thought I’d like something difi’rent this time,” „ “They’re mighty good colors, Mrs. Skinner.” “I’ve an idea the plaid’ll run in waehin’.” “What! Gingham like that run? That singham will wash long’s there’s a rag of it, fnl never fade.” “I ain’t S' j sure o’ that.” “Chaw a piece and see. No’m, that gingham ’ll b : le like mus'in. Don’t you see it says ‘fast colors’ on the label? ” “Aw, that don’t count for nothin’ nowadays. How much is it?” “Twenty-five cents a yard.” “How much!” “Twenty-five cents.” “For gingham like that.” “Yes’m, an’ cheap at that.” “My land! I’ve bought better gingham a-many, an’ a-many a time fnr a shillin.” r— —r“It wasn't such gingham au thia.” “It was a leetie better if anything.” “I guess yt r mistaken. This gingham cost me twerty-four cents.” “Then you got dreadfully cheated.” “It’d be a bsrgain at thii ty cents.” “Pshaw, msn, your crazy! Now, look here, Sam Peters, i’ll give you twenty cents,a yard for that gingham, an’ it’s all I will give.” “Can’t do it, Mrs. Skinner. Say twenty-three an’ I’ll do it, but I’ll lose money.” - ■ ■ ,/ . ' _ ■ “Twenty’s all I’ll give"’ “I’ll split the difference, ’ an’ say wenty-two and a half.” “’Taint wuth it, Sam.” “It’s wuth two bits.” “Pshaw!” “ ’Deed it is.” “I kin git better gingham fer fifteen cents in town.” “Not much, you can’t.” “I know I kin.” “I ll give you twenty-one cents if you’ll throw in a card of hooks and eyes.” “Can’t do it.” “Well, say a spool of thread.” 'll’rn lesin’ money as it is.” “Law, Sam, I’ll bet you, make ten cents a yard on that ginipiiwn. You kin put in a card o’ buttons anyhow.’* “I’ll say six buttons.” “Why can’t you make it a dozen- ” “Oh, I’m losin’ money naw.” “How yau talk!’’ “It’s sol” “ Well, gimme a yard an’ the six buttons an’ a stick o’ pep’mint candy for the baby. But I'm gittin’ cheated. Take your pay in aigs, won’t you?” “No, I couldn’t.” “Ain’t aigs sameez money?” “No’p.” “Well, you store keepers do beat all at makin’ a bargin. You don’t leave a body a foot to stand on.”

No October States.

Kansas City Star. It has been noted that the coming presidential canvass is the first one in the history of the government which will not be marked by debatable preliminary con'te ; t’. The removal of Ohio and Indiana from the list of October States will eliminate an element of into rest from the campaign' which has been hardl second in warmth and importance to the National canvass. The only States this year that vote before the president. ial election are Vermont and Maine, and they cannot be classed as disputed ground. The change robs the former debatable October States of mu eh of their political prestige, but it also lessens to a material degree the tremendous strain which the canvass of a presidential year inevitably imposes.

He Was Acquitted.

Lincoln Journal. __ 22 ' Judge—Prironer, you are charged with having brutally assaulted this man. “I admit it, your Honor, but there were extenuating circumstances.” “Of what nature?” r “Why, this man asked me ‘if a hen and a half laid an egg and a half in a day and a half how many—” “That will do. You are die charged.” All the world may be a stage, but the fare is not particularly cheap.