Rensselaer Republican, Volume 20, Number 30, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 29 March 1888 — HOW JOHN PROPOSED. [ARTICLE]

HOW JOHN PROPOSED.

Chicago Mail. “Dear me, I know he ia just ready to say it, and I can’t see why he doesn't eay it” And nretty Mary Branwood pnekered tip her lips into the eweeteet of all pome, and plied her needle more rapidly than ever. “It does aeem »o me ▼crv strange,” ahe added after a brief panae, “that a great bur nun should be eo timid about saying he loved a girl. Dear me, it’s enough to aggravate a url into taking advantage of—” And Miss Mary blushed rosily add finished the sentence with a hyßterical laugh. - r

Mary Branwood was jnst at this moment thinkirg of John Walker, who for the past two years liaJ been her escort upon every possible occasion. For a long time each had looked npon the other with exprestive eyes, and, though the gossips of that part of Harlem looked npon the ending of their courtship as a settled matter, John had not a*ked the all important question. Mary’s womanly intuition prompted Hie thought that he had been trying to voice the love he had so often displayed, bat his natural bashfnlnees seemed an iosnrmonntable barrier. Bo Miss Mary sat that February afternoon in her chair, briskly rocking to and fro. The afternoon was nearly gone and the girl was impatiently wailing for eight o'clock, when the bashful John would arrive to take her to the class in vocal music at the chiirch. Her heart beat faster as the moments sped. Her rosy cheeks flashed more deeply as her mind dwelt npon the possible form of the question that she felt must soon be asked- She knew there would be nothing romantic about John’s asking her, for she was sure he would do so in a blundering way. The thing that troubled her moßt was that after he really did master ap sufficient courage her long knowledge of his purpose would prevent her showing a proper amount of surprise and embarrassment. She knew she would blnsh, but she hoped it would be so deep a blush that John could not fail to see it. She started suddenly and her face flashed with a feeling that there was a tinge of immodesty and hypocrisy in her train of thoughts. ‘Bhe felt guilty of being immodest in thinking of proposing herself and of hypocrisy in hoping she would blush as though she had not expected the question. Her thoughts annoyed her, and failing to drive them away as she sat eewiug she laid down her work and busied herself cleaning qp

the room. ' When both hands of the clock reached eight the light ring of the door bell told her of John's arrival.could be seen that though his youthful lace was suflased with blaßhes there was an unmistakable air of manliness about him. When his brown eyes looked into Mary’s she felt so strong and confident that her kalf uttered thoughts during the afternoon oi taking advantage of the season to render a little assistance came to her, and a moment later she was oppressed with the thought that if he had asked her she really would not have blushed. Then she tried to drive away the thought vyith a mighty effort as her old feeling of immodesty and hypocrisy came to htr and the crimson flash covered her face as Bhe saw that John was trying to sav something. A few minutes later the two were carefully walking along the icy sidewalk in the direction of the church. They discusied the weather and everything in cmntcion with the singing school until they reached the church and then they both in the exercises. Mary sang exceedingly well, John was equally tuccessfnl until they sang the strain: We share our mutual woes. Our mutual burdens bear. Then it suddenly dawned npon him ' how easy it wonld be to him to say, ‘‘Mary, let ns share oar mutual woes,” and he couldn’t dir miss it from his mind ail the evening. Every now and then, to nis great embarrassment, he got out of tone. To make matters worse the professor noticed it each time, and in a kindly tone, offered a suggestion which

increased John’s confusion. There was no one in the class gladder than John when half past nine came and he and ! Mary atepped out into the moonlight to go home. They picked tbeir wav along the sidewalk slowly, cautiously and in silence. John did not speak for two reasons. He was opr reseed with the thought that he had been particularly stupid daring the whole evening, and he was repeating the sentence, “Marv, let us share our mutual woes,” so that when they stood beneath the light in the little par or he could put his arm aroum? her, and say it without blundt r rg. Mary was silent with expectation.' How brief a sentence would have made them supremely happy! John's absent-mindedness strved to distract his attention from the icy walk more than he sbonld have allowed, and no less than half a dozen times Mary’s feet slipped, but each time she found herself borne up hv. her sturdy lover. Each slip was accompanied »r,h a little shriek, and when she was again safe

her soft laugh was music to him. A group of boys pulling a sled turned the corner ahead and dashed past them. Mary turned her head to glance after them. Her foot slipped, a little shriek and she was down. But she wasn’t alone. In falling she had managed to knock John’s feet from under him, and he had fallen too. Each scrambled to rise quickly and their heads came together with a sound bump. John was in the ihroesof mortification upon his awkwardness, when Mary said naively as he helped her to her feet. “We seem to be sharing our mutual woes.”

He was amazed. The very sentence had beeD saving for under the gaslight! Before he could take advantage of his present opportnnitv, however, Mary seemed to realize that she had been immodest, and 6he talked incessantly as they walked on, as if determined that he sbonld reap no advantage from her remark. John made several efforts to recall the opportunity, but was baffled •very time. Then be determined to wait nntil they stood beneath the gaslight, but when they reached the parlor the light seemed to burn more brightly than ever before, and his courage departed. Once he made an effort, but the first word that passed his lips was “woes,” and the consciousness that he was blundering censed him to blush and pause before trying again. But a sweet “What were you going to sav?” completed his embarrassment, and he answered “Nothing,” and in despair prepared to go. A moment later, as they stood at the parlor door exchanging the last words, and as John’s hand was on the knob, Mary turned.her blue eyes to him and said withalangb: “You’ll be sure to get home without falling, for you’ll have no one to drag you down.”

John’s face crimsoned. He was about to protest she hadn’t dragged hiin down, when he thought of his lost opportunity after they had fallen. He had a feeling that the sentence he had been trying to say all evening would be singularly inopportune now, but he was determined not to lose another chance. Despite that feeling and in sheer desperation he gasped: “Mary, let us woes our mutual shares always?’’ Mary looked puzzled. For a moment she didn’t grasp the purport of the misquoted sentence. When it pawned npon her a flood of crimson passed over her face, her eyes fell and she whispered “Yes.” And John, with newly acquired coarage, put his arms around her and drew her to his breast. Then John was at peace and Mary perfectly happy. The question had been asked and answered and she had fittingly blushed, besides Brother G&rclner and Darwin. Detroi l F rec Press. ; “I hold leah in my hand,” said

Brother Gardner,as the meeting opened, “a letter from Cincinnati axin if dis clnb believes in de Darwin theory. Da Secretary will reply dat we doan bheve in nuffin’ of the sort. It’s agin de Bible, as well as good common sense. - Dis club aims to size np a man about as follers: “1. His great gran sadder may hev bin a babooq, but will he lift his eand de log? **•-' “2. His great gran’mudder may hev biian alligator, bat does he eat wid his knife?

”3. His uncle may hev bin a buffalo, but will dis candy date pay his dues promptly? , *'4 All his back relasbums may hev had wings an’ bin called buzzards, but does dis pusson buy his own tobacker? ‘‘When we enter a street kyar we am not trubbled about whar the hoes cum from, or in what State de driver was bo’yi, or who made de kyar. De only queshun wid us it: Will de sad-eyed driver manage to elucidate dat quinine to oar destinashun? It is de same in regard to men. We doan’ ask if a candydate’s sadder dfiv a mule or owned a warehouse. De qneshan is on de candy date hiaself.” PENSTOCK BOBS UP. “Misser Chairman,” said tke Rev. Penstock as he bobbed up like a released bed spring, *T move dat de records be corrected.” “In what perticknlar, sah!” , “De chair made use of de expreshnm: ‘Elucidate de qninine to our destinashun.’ It wasaslip of de tongue. He ■ “ • -----'

meant: ‘Agitate de equine to our destination.' i move to correct” “Ar’ dat moehun supported?’ demanded tne President as he looked around him. It was not. “Brndder Penstock, sot down! Fur de past six weeks you hev bin spekin’ ty make yerself as disagreeable as possible, an* you hev finally reached de limit I shall now fine you $6,000 an’ coats!” “What fui?” “Fur your middlin’ presumpshnn, sab!” “But de chair said, elucidate’ fur agitate,’ an’ ‘quinine’ fur ‘equine.’” “When dis cha’r said: ‘Elucidate dat quinine to our destiuashun,’ be meant just what he (aid an’ nobody in dis room but yoti misunlei stood him. De fine agaipt yon will stand, sab, an’ if you doan’ sot down I’ll double de amount!” Seeing that he was without support Penstock sat down, but he privately informed Pickle Smith, who had the stool beside him, that he would carry t..e case to the Supreme Court if it coßt him a million dollars.