Rensselaer Republican, Volume 20, Number 22, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 2 February 1888 — CURRENCY [ARTICLE]

CURRENCY

Detroit Free Frees. ’ Beats all how a fellow ean look back over ’B7 and see where a fellow made a fool of himself. Maryland has jailed a seven-wife man. He says any man who would live a bach- lor life is an idiot.

“The quiet girl never wears high colors on the street,” says an exchange. Just take a walk and pick out your quiet girl, will you? There are now six different painless methods of extracting teeth, aud every one of them is warranted to make a fellow believe his last hour has come. A California washwoman who was left a legacy of S7OO had twenty-two offers of marriage within a month. It’s the glorious climate, you know. In the year 1545 the royal head of France paid $3,000 to have a corn removed from his toe. The price to-day is only nity cents and warranted not to return. Some of the Indians have become such good farmers that their pumpkins cost hem only seventy eents apiece, and ey can raise turnips for about $2 per bushel.

Wolves are so plenty in Russia this year that no man has to go off his own and to be eaton alive. There are always certain comforts and privileges to offset despotism. At a pound party in lowa the other evening fifteen different people received pouhdings, aud w tea a local paper said the thing was a great success nobody could deny it.

A robber got into a farm house in lowa without disturbing the sleeping people, but a big dog tackled him and ore his throat so that he bled to death. He was identified as a Justice of the Peace. Boston complains that outsiders eome into the city and get drunk and are charged up to the Hub when they shouldn’t be. If Boston furnishes the I quor she shouldn’t shirk the other business.

Four sheep, a hog and ten bushels of wheat settled an lowa breach of promise suit where 425,000 damages were demanded. The lawyers got all but the hog, which died before they could drive it away. A Vernmont hunter broke his leg within forty rods of a fam house, and he shouted for twenty-two hours before ihe farmer came to the spot. He said he thought it was “them hogs” making a racket The lowest temperature in Vermont this winter was only 32 degrees below, and the old natives are scratching their heads and wondering if it'le last fail or next spring. The gate posts haven’t been heaved out of the ground yet. The raisin crop is 25,000 boxes short this year, and if the landlady works in a few peanut shusks and peach skins you will understand and appreciate hoi motive. That shortage must be up somehow.

A citizen in a Chicago suburb is uu-lku arrest for compelling his two boys to swallow a mixture of- molasses and cayenne pepper twice per day. His idea was to warm them up so they would not need overcoats, but they got sick over it.