Rensselaer Republican, Volume 19, Number 25, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 February 1887 — Didn’t Sign. [ARTICLE]

Didn’t Sign.

Arkansaw printing office. A delegation froni “away back” files in. Leader (to business manager of office) —’Lowed, a passjl of us did, that we’d come up an’ sign fur yo' paper.” Business Manager (smiling warmly) —Glad to see you, gentlemen. Won’t you have seats? Leader—No, ain’t got time to set. Whut yer boldin’ yo’ paper at now? B. M.—Two dollars a year. Leader—That much? Didn’t’low it ryuz mo’n er dollar. Ken git ther Fireside Smile fur six bits. 4 B. M.—Ah, well, you see that it is only a cheap concern, a sort of advertising dodge. What you want is home news. Leader—Yas, fack. Wall, Lige Baily (addressing one of the delegation), plank down. Lige— Don’t b’lieve I wanter sign fur it ter-day. Leader—W’y, yer wanted me ter come up here with yer. Whut yer come up fur? Lige—Wanted ter sorter look er round. Leader—Jim Boyle, you wanter sign, don’t yer ? Jim—No, don’t b’lieve I do, ter-day. Leader—W’y, ding it all, you said yer wanted ter sign. Jim—l said I mout sign. Leader—Tai Payton, I know you wanter sign. Tai—l ’low to sign airter while —airter I git in a little better shtqpe. Leader—Why not now? Tai—Ain't fixed well ernuff now. Ain’t mo’n got money ernuff ter run me till I git home. I like the paper mighty well. Got some of the best things in it I ever seen. Leader—Wall, es none uv yer wanter sign, reckon we’d better go, as we’ve got a good deal uv knockin’ round ter do. B. M. (to leader) —You wish to subscribe, do you not? Leader—No, I jest come up with the boys, here, an’ I don’t b’lieve 1 wanter sign fer it ter-day. Like the paper mighty well, an’ hope ter be able ter sign fer it putty soon. Wall, good day. A few moments later. In a saloon. Leader—Wall, fellers, nominate yo’ pizen. Lige—Hol’ on; I’m doin’ this, ( throwing a ten-dollar note on the bar). Jim (sweeping the money back to Lige and replacing it with a gold piece) —Not much yer ain’t. I axed yer in here, I reckon. Tai (with pretended indignation)— Not by a jugful. Axed yer in myself. Here (to bar-tender), give us some straight goods. Leader—lt makes no difference who pays for it. Wall, here’s hopin’.—Arkansaw Traveler.