Rensselaer Republican, Volume 19, Number 21, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 January 1887 — Too Old. [ARTICLE]

Too Old.

A young man with an expression of confidence on biaJace entered a Michigan avenue clothing store and asked: “I am straight business. I want a suit of clothes. There are seven of us who will buy bur clothes at the same plat e. 1 have been sent on ahead to get prices.” “Humph!” “If I bring the other six here to buy what will you make this S2O suit for ?” The clothier went over and'sat down by the stove with a di.-gusted look on his fat e. “Y'ou didn’t answer my question.” “My frendt, please go oudt. You make me. werry tired!” “What’s the matter with you ? Don’t you want me to bring the party here?” “No, my frendt, I don’t, All my sales to-day go to an orphan asylum, and I like to keep ’em down to a summer coat and a pair of second-hand pants. Better try der man two doors below.” —Detroit Free Press.

The publisher of Baltimore (Md.j Every Saturday, Mr. T. J. Wentworth, says liis child, aged six months, was suffering from a seveie cohl, and be gave it Ived Star Cough Cure, which acted like a charm. No morphia. . Accounts are given in the German technical, journals of some interesting experiments which have been made, and it wou'd appear with success, in the employment of paper in piano construction. The case is made entirely of paper, as a substitute for wood, the material being so compressed as to be susceptible to the Mgk polish which is required for such instruments. As described, the color is a creamy white; the tone is reported to be characterized by sweetness rather than loudness, the souna emitted, unlike the short, broken note of the ordinary piano, being soft, full and slightly continuous, somewhat resembling that of the organ. This modification of tone, which must be considered an attractive feature, is attributed to the evenness of texture of the compressed paper. Mil Buchtkr. a well-known citizen of Lancaster, Pa., inter used St. Jacobs Oil, and considers it an excellent remedy in cases of swellings, bruises and bums. According to the Belgian savant, a man attains his maximum weight about his fortieth year, and begins to lose it toward his sixtieth year. A woman, however, does not attain lier maximum weight until her fiftieth year. The weight of persons of the same age in different classes of society also differs. In the aliuent classes the average maximum weight is 172 pounds, and is attained at fifty years. In the artisan class it is 154 pounds, atta ned at forty. Among farm laborers it is 171 pounds, attained at sixty. In the general classes it is 164 pounds, anaiis reached between forty and fifty years of age. * ' In grinding brass valves do not use emery. The dust from a grindstone is mnch better and cheaper. It will not become imbedded in the metal and cat ridges, as emery wiLL