Rensselaer Republican, Volume 19, Number 12, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 November 1886 — Page 2

.. NONE Mil l MISS THEE." Few wHUmAm thee. Friend, when thou F<-r a month in dust hast lain. SktlKni hand and anxiou* brow, Torftie Of Wisdom, busy brain— All tbou wsrt shall be forgot Aud thy place shall know thee not Shadows from the bending treat O'er thy lowly 1»< ad may paas, Stghs from < very wondering breore - HUrihwlosg, thick churchyard grass—- . Wilt thou heed them ? No; tty slurp • Shall be dreamless, calm, and deep firms sirrT* bird may sit and sing On the marble of thy tomb, Soon to flit on joyous song From that place of death and gloom On some bough to warble clear; But those socks c.iou shall not hear. Some kind voice may sing thy praise, , Passing near thr place of rest Frindlytalk of "other days*—’ But HO throb within tby breast Shall ret pond to wools of praise, Or old thoughts of "other days.* Since so fleeting Is thy name. ■w Talent, b-auty, power, aud wit . It were well that without shoiuo * Thou in Ood’s great book wert writ There in golden words to be Graven for eternity, —Cham .Vr,V Journal.

A HAUNTED SHANTY.

BY W. H. S. ATKINSON.

lam a full-fledged man, now. There is Dot the shadow of a doubt about the matter. Any question in regard thereto would be forever settled by a conple of little fellows who follow ine around the house and yard, addressing me twenty times in a minute as “papa.” Even if this did not suffice, the generous sprinkling of white hnirs upon say head would tell their own tale. But, just about twenty years ago, I really was not quite sure whether I was a boy or a man. Iwas 19 years old, and, although blessed with the tegs and shoulders (upd I might add whiskers) of a man, I carried about with me tbo head of a great overgrown boy. And when I eny that I had a„ boy’s head, do not imagine that it was a dull boy’s head; my cranium enclosed a brain —a most fertile brain, I assure you, for devising mischief. I had the misfortune- to be born and raised in the village of Whippoorwill, the - aleepiest place, par excellence, in Western Ohio. The ehnnge from the dull routine of country-life, to which wo could look forward, was an annual visit to the fair at Mndvillc. the County Seat. The only thing, out of the ordinary, which existed iu Whippoorwill, was Sammy Wagstaff, who was popularly supposed to have “a tile loose,” and who undoubtedly rata a little •off;" while the only crtnt which had transpired up to the time of this chronicle, And which seems to me worth recording, was the disappearance of pretty Jennie Chester under a clond of disgrace. I mention these things, not that they particularly effect my story, but because they will in part explain tbe reason why I attach some importance to the only excitement of my younger days. But stav—in recording these slight deviations from our ’‘trivial round,” 1 had well-nigh forgotten the most important piece of stock-in-trade for Whippoorwill gossips, the “show” place of the township. Two or three miles trout the “center” was a deserted house, Known as the Red Shanty. How it derived its name I cannot say, nnless its old boards, blenched by years of wind and rain, had at one time been painted red. It was a queer-looking building, standing in the middle of a held. It consisted of three stories, the lower one brick and the upper ones of wood. The windows of the first two stories were boarded up securely, but those of the lop floor- let in whatever light could pierce through a generation of dust. The place wus believed by all orthodox citizens of the township to be haunted, and not even the owner could he induced to go within forty rods of the Bed Slianty after dark. What gave rise to the superstition? no one seemed to know, and I knew no more than the rest, but, with the rest, I shared iu the general feeling that there was something "uncanny” about the Bed Shanty. Now, among the Hoosier citizens of Whippoorwill, I was considered rather a smart boy. although I must confess that most of my smartness ran tef deviltry. On account of this smartness, whether real or imaginary, my father determined to make me something more than a farmer, and sent me when about 19 years old to Mudville to learn telegraphy. In due course of time I was appointed night operator at Whippoorwill siding. Now, without the lecture that my father bestow-cd iipon me. I know tha t a telegraph operator on a railroad should quit all snch devil's tricks as 1 had been in the habit of indulging in, and 1 eertainly did 6ober -down. Indeed, the surroundings of my daily, or rather nightly, duties were not very exmiles irorn the village, and the telegraph •cabin was fully half a mile fron niv house, except the Bed Shanty, which I could have hit with a stone from the door of the cabin. .-I had been nt. the siding about two months, when, as I sat in front of the cabin on a fine September midnight, I most distinctly saw a light shining from one of the upper windows of the Bed Shanty. It burned for two or three minutes and then went ottt. It was certainly very strange, because in all my life no one had ever lived in that old house, and, as I passed it in the evening on my way to work, I had noticed it barred and boarded so long as I can remember. - I thought about the light all night, and when I was relieved iu the morning I said nothing, but took a walk around by the Bed Shanty. Its appcainnye was unchanged, und there was not a sign of its being inhabited, so I came to the conclusion that my eyes had deceived me. The pext night I looked in the direction of the haunted house several times, but saw nothing. The third night I watched agaiu and mo6t certainly saw a light, and furthermore, heard a door closed. I am afraid I was rather supen&itious in those days, and I didn’t like this Bed Bhanty business at all. _ The following day I met several of “the boys” aiid we all Strolled down to the haunted house, when I told them of what I bad seen and heard. Some of them proposed going through the place then and there, to see who or what was inside. But others of us, including myself, suggested that ffhoata and “snch stuff” kept out of the way in the daylight, so that an assault just then would be useless. Besides, I had a bold scheme of my own to propose —a plan which (I thought) would at once be a huge joke for all the boys and particularly satisfactory to me. Indeed, I know that, altbouah I did not care very much about the strange light I had seen, it .was my inordinate love for a joke-or an adventure which put the idea, which now ocenpied it, into my head. I proposed, to a select company of youths, nothing less than the destruction, by gun- ~ powder or dynamite, of tbe notorious Bed Shanty! .' : ; ~~ I knew that if the plan was generally ventilated in the village it would be seriously, and probably, effectually opposed. Once the place was destroyed, 1 imagined cobod v would kidk very hard. So we resolved to keep tbe scheme among our halfdozen selves, and I was appointed a committee of one to secure powder and otherwise jferfect the arrangement for the ex-

•..; j, %■ ... i.-.r i.e.siU-.*..* .. • . y LJLStII,*My father being tho proprietor of a stone quarry in the township, it wae not a very difficult matter for mo to procrire, in a quiet way. a quantity of blasting powder. I had seen them blast stone, and knew how to lay a powder, (rain, but I wag absolutely ignorant of the laws of resistance, and knew no more than the man in the moon what quantity of powder would be required to demolish the Bod Shanty. , None of ua, bold wreckers that we were, dare go very close to the haunted house in the dark, and I could hot leave my cabin at night, anyway. It was Anally arranged that I should fix the charges of powder and lay trains to a small grove of trees, a couple of hundred yards distant, from the lied Shanty, from tho shelter of Which some of the boys should, at midnight, start the explosion. . : i Two or threo evenings later I deposited a matter Of forty pounds of powder, in half adozen smnll heaps, around the ill-fated house. Then we slowly laid trains of powder from those heaps to the grove, and theq, after giving final directions to my first lieutenant, I went to my duties at the telegrnph cabin, to await ns patiently as I could Ihe “greatest display of fireworks ever witnessed iu Mud County." About 11:40 tbe limited mail from the west, enrrying mail and express only, was due to pass my cabin. A freight from the east, if on time, would be side-lracked at Whippoorwill to allow the express to pass. Sometimes, however, the freight was very late, and in that case would bo side-tracked at Muldoon's Crossing, nine miles east of me. On other, but very rare occasions, the freight would be just a minute or so late, and then I sometimes was obliged to stop tbe mail train fqr a * few moment's. Anyway, by 11:50 everything would be clenr of Whippoorwill, and I could watch, unhindered, tho demolition of the Bod Shanty. On this night, at 11:15, I received a message from the train dispatcher, saying that Freight, No.. 19 would bo side-tracked at Muldoon’s Crossing, and to show Number 4 (the mail) a clear road to that point. Accordingly, I set my target signal at “line clear,” and awaited tbe mail. I had hardly set the target when I noticed six or eight men coming from the direction of the Bed Shanty. They could not bo the boys; I was quite sure of that, because no one in Whippoorwill would go so close to the haunted house at that time of night. Nearer they came, and in a few moments a crowd of masked and heavilyarmed men stood before me. “Are yon the operator?” asked the apparent leader, ••■'—-■ I nodded assent. I think my tongue was too large for my mouth just then. “This target is set so as to give a clear road to the mail train, andßhe will not have to stop here?" Again I nodded. Ewell, just you fix that target so she will slow up. D’ye hear?” I heard but I didn’t obey the fellow. I was certainly a little superstitious, but I was no coward where live men were concerned. I did not know what these fellows meant to do exactly; but I guessed they meant robbery, v aud knew by their appearance thaj they would stop at no amount of bloodshed to accomplish their designs. So I made no effort to adjust the target for them. The leader took a step forward, and. laying his hand upon a big revolver, said: ; “Now, boy, I want you to have this signal fixed so that the train will slow up. When she is pretty near to the cabin, and before she quite stops, signal her to go on. D’ye understand? Do this and you’ll be solid. If you don’t, why, by God! I’ll send you to Kingdom Come inside of thirty seconds! Hurry!” But I did not move, and I verily believe that a chamber of that big revolver would have been emptied through my skull had not one of the gang interfered. “Oh, lot the cub alone,” said this fellow. “I can set the target. You fellows can spare me. A couple of you take that young rooster and put him where he can’t be seen or heard for awhile, and then attend to your business. I’ll be operator for tonight.” In a few more minutes I was taken down to the Bed Shanty, where I was securely gagged, bound hand and foot, and tied to a door frame on the upper floor. It was impossible for me to move or speak. Now I knew the secret of the lights and noises at this horrible old house. It had been the rendezvous for a week past of a bold gang of train robbers. At first I lay there wondering if they would succeed in their designs on the train, and it was several minutes before I recollected that in less than an hour tbe Bed Shauty would be blown up by tho very gunpowder which I had myself set that evening! Not a sound or a sigxrnl could I make'—my only chance was that some of the boys might go up to the cabin, and, finding me away, let the explosion go until another night. I heard the. mail train whistle as she slowed-npr—-then 1 heard her short, shrill whistle as she started up again. Doubtless tho robbers had been successful in boarding the train. After that all was still for perhaps a quarter of an hour, and then I heard, through the night air, the voices of the boys as they prepared to start the explosion. Well, I just counted myself a dying man, and thoughts of jll kinds ran riot through my brain. Distinctly through the Still, elear atmosphere, although it must have been 200 yards away, I heard a match struck, and in another moment —perhaps the most awful moment of my life, I heard a tiz—fiz—fiz, saw the reflection of several lurid flashes, and then all was still. V' 7 ~

The explosion was a failure! Thank Heaven I was safe! Alas! I was by no moans safe. I was tkariking heaven too soon, altogether, for in a minute the Bed Shanty was enveloped iu flames. It had taken fire, aud tbe old place, being as dry as tinder, was flaming away like a coal-oil torch. Death was coming to me in one of its most frightful forms! Of the two, I think I would have preferted instantaneous death by an explosion to being roasted alive. ? I wondered where the boys were, for I could not hear them. They bad probably decamped, afraid of being caught firing their neighbor's property. Surely, then, 1 thought, the flames would attract some of the folks living in the neighborhood. Doubtless they would be mound soon, bnt 1 suppose seconds seemed hours just then. At lajjtj'When I was gelling uncomfortably warm, and half-choked with smoke, I heard footsteps on the stairway, and into the room burst the man who had already saved my life once—the fellow vrho., had undertaken to arrange the target signal when I refused. - He quickly whipped the gag out of my month. “Young fellow,” said he,. “I think I have done you one good turn, already; swear to give me a show at getting away, and I will do vou another.” “I swear," I replied, rather readily. Then h« unfastened me, still leaving my hands and feet tightly hound, and carried, me down below. He laid me down in the field, beyond the reach of the burning sparks, and as he disappeared he remarked: “I saw the flames, and didn’t want a roasted man on my conscience. Now, remember, you cannot identify me or. any of the gang.” Soon, half a dozen farmers and others I stood around me, Mid to them I told Ate J whole story. '' " i= ““

| It was a “close call” for me, and I doubt whether, If I had not received that severe lesson, I should-* have been a gray-haired man ot 38—and hlso, I may perhaps add. superintendent of the railroad on which I j started as night operator. One thing is • absolutely certain: I was lastingly cured of my love for jokes and adventures. The train-robbers were most; of them, captured and imprisoned, bnt the man who saved me from roasting 1 have never seen since that dose call in the Bed Shanty.

Little Gauze Wings.

Flies! who does not think of them as only tormenting little creatures, always buzzing about in the most annoying sort of way, and often tantalizing to the last degree, for as certainly as one may brush the insect away, just as Burely will it return to the very samo place, with Buch persistence that one feels in frantic despair at ever getting rid of it. At such a time one can scarcely give a thought as to whether it lias the slightest beauty, and is a daintily-formed little creature, this eonjmon house-fly, with which every one is familiar. It is a wonderfully beautiful subject to examine through tho microscope; tho legs and feet so slight that it seems as if a touch must surely break such frail things, and still there is wonderful power in these samo small foet, for the fly can as easily walk on the ceiling over our heads as he can walk on the table before us, and this power ho derives from the suckers with which his feet are provided, and at the same time a fluid exudes from the suckers, which causes such groat adhesion that even on the most highlypolished surface the fly can remain in a reversed position for a long time. The hard covering of the body of this insect consists of three layers, and the membrane Of the wings is a filmy expansion of the outer one or epidermis. The ribs or veins of the wings arc tubes through which air is conveyed. The wings are thinner in appearance than gauze, and the fine, delicate veins—or fibers seem scarcely covered, except when the light falls upon them and causes them to flash with brilliant prismatic colors, green, crimson, and purple, till they seem like beautiful gems. The head of the insect is large, and of the softest jet black, and in the mouth is a wonderfully-constructed little tongue, somewhat like that of the butterfly. Flies are very particular about keeping their eoats carefully polished till they are of dazzling brightness, and many a time they may be seen busily and briskly rubbing with their feet, as these serve the purjvose of a brush, first one and then another part of their small bodies, w hich they thus put in order. Flies are fond of sweets, as every one knows, and are thereby attracted from every direction. Quassia is very fatal to them, and is safer to use for their destruction than almost anything else. Flies exist in all parts of the world, anu there are many species, some of which serve for medical purposes, such as cantharides, or Spanish fiy, and there are many which are only destructive and tormenting. Perhaps, since .we have stopped for a moment to think of the beauties of these small creatures, and consider how exquisite and wonderful is the mechanism of each minute part which has been formed by the Creator of the universe, we shall not look so slightingly upon these insects, and it may help us to feel less impatient with their teasing ways.— Vick’s Magazine.

Potatoes.

There is a frequently quoted but most fallacious rumor floating around that bread is the staff of life. Believe me, it is all veritable nonsense; simply another concoction of the wheat speculator. To bo sure, if you use the term in its broadest meaning, to include crackers, sweet-cakes, and slap-jacks, as well as the commodity that is sliced off the loaf, there is probably more bread used than any other item in the world’s bill of fare; but for good sustaining assistance- there is no better prop on which limping humanity can lean than the invigorating potato. It is most palatable, capable of infinite variety in its preparation, and exhilarates but never inebriates, possessing none of tha qualities of a “sourmasli” even when served in the form in which it usually accompanies roast beef. The nature of the potato is most itnobstrusive, there is nothing in the wide world so immensely serviceable that has received so little commendation: however, its modesty bespeaks its merit * We must acknowledge the potato is not a pretty thing to look upon. Its form is not comely, its color hot aesthetic, and its skin is hough add lumpy; wash it clean of the dirt off its native homo and it does not gain much. Son/e things, like certain varieties of wild flowers, are not pretty as a single specimen, yet when, you get a number of them together they are quite handsome, but the potato has not even this advantage, for a heap of a thousand potatoes is no more beautiful than a lone solitary tuber. But take them when they are prepared for ouar use, when we find them on the tablo cracking open, white as snow, full of steaming nourishment, they are lovely to the eye aird savory to the palate^. Only give the potato a little seasoning, a little luxurious cream, and a good stirring up, and the richness, the pleasure it can confer is unrivaled. The potato is the - symbol of plain, substantial, useful, but homely, people. Their unobstrusiveness may teach you more fortunate ones how your homely brothers and sisters feel. You may leai-n from the potato that there aro thousands of inen and women, unattractive in appearance, uncouth in speech, and awkward in manner, whose hearts are rich in goodness and whose* lives are a perpetual unfolding benefaction to those around them. They only need a little stirring up, a little developing, a little investigation, and their repaying qualities are found to be unequaledc —Chicago Ledyw. A little management may often evade resistance, which a vast foree might vainly strive to Overcome. Satire is a gloss in which the beholder aees everybody's faee hut liis own, “7

POPULAR SCIENCE.

The eyes of poisonous snakes have been found by Dr. Benjamin Sharp to have elliptical. pSpflj, while in the harmless species they are circular. It is said that only about ono-third of the buried city of Pom pep has yet been unearthed. The Italian! Government is pushing the excavations with great vigor, -and very interesting remains are being constantly broughtllo light, / Dh. C. Keller, of Zurich, finds reason for believing that spiders destroy more aphides and insect enemies of trees than do all the insect-eating birds. His views have been verified by observations on coniferous trees, a few broad- leafed trees and apple trees. It is said that with a rock-salt lens photographs may be taken of a heated object (with a specially prepared plate) in the dark. For instance, a photograph could be made of a black-hot casting or stove in a dark room. This is because it allows artificial light to pass through it freely, while glass absorbs both" artificial heat and light. At the sea level, where the atmospheric pressure is about fifteen pounds per square inch',* water boils at 212 degrees F. At Argents, Montana, where the pressure of tho atmosphere is considerably less, the boiling point of water is about 200 degrees. On Mont Blanc it is 187 degrees. In a vacuum it is about 98 degrees, according to the perfection of the vacuum. Tiie carefully compiled list of Prof. C. G. Roekwood, Jr., reports seventyone American earthquakes for 1885;” five of the number being doubtful. Of the total the Canadian provinces furnished 8; New England, 5; the Atlantic States, 9; the Mississippi Valley, 3; the Pacific Coast of the United States, 34; Alaska, 2 ; Mexico, 1; Central America, 2; the West Indies, 2; Ecuador, 1; Peru and Chili, 3; the Argentine Republic, 1. Classified by seasons, 24 camein winter, 22 in spring, 14 in summer, and 11 in autumn. Among other successful mixtui-es in which to harden steel is the salt brine used in Sheffield. It seems that, as this mixture gets older, and from being constantly used, it improves its valuable qualities to such an extent that very often the water is sold at almost as dear a price as bad whisky. The idea seems to be that from constantly dipping the heated particles into the water, the air is driven ,out. In some cases these tanks are fifty years old, and are valued in proportion to their age. Mr. Graber lias recently described, in the transactions bf the Vienna Academy, the results of observations indicating that eyeless animals are sensible to light. In a box divided into compartments, and each furnished with two openings, he distributed equally a number of earth-worms. One of the openings in each compartment he obscured or concealed, and exposed the box to the light, examining the worms from time to time, and adding new ones every four hours. By repeated observations he found that they showed a decided tendency to withdraw to the darker parts of the compartments, only forty out of a total of 250 remaining in the light. He also studied the influence of different rays upon them, and found them susceptible to the, different Colors. When the openings were covered with blue glass, they manifested a marked preference for the red light.

Different Kinds of Travelers.

Have you noticed how some people enter a car and where they sit? A lady will walk past a dozen vacant seals, often the entire length of the car, then come back again and take one of the seats she has just passed, and often after she is seated change to another just exactly like the one she leaves; never exactly decided a( home or abaoatL The ©ld traveler walks direct to the best seat in. the, ear that is vacant, i, e.w the one nearest the center and on the shady side, not because it rides easier; but it is; safer in case of any accident. The o. fc. never passes a vacant seat, if the car is- any way nearly full. The small boy or his sister must get. next the window, and usually flattens his nose- against it if it is not open,, he I being on kis knees on the seat,. we mean the small boy on a small journey. If tbe trip lengthens out any he will get all over the car before he gets- tothe end: es the trip. The backwoodsman will take the first seat inside the door whether, the car is crowded or empty, and will put biS entire family on the one seat if he can squeeze them in between the arm of the seat and the window. If it’s down in Kentucky or Tennessee they will take off hats and bonnets and mate themselves at Lome. The colored brother or sister &o*a down South hunts a window before- he doe* a seat, raises the sash quickly, passes his body through to the waist, and to people he has told good-by he shouts again: “Goo’-by, gpo-’-bv. Give my love to Aint Mary. Goo-bye. You must write,” while the person yelled at is as innocent of writing as a babe. When the train is on its. way he sinks into a scat, the one where he is, as good as any ; he stays there, looks around with a smile of satisfaction, is glad he is alive, and gladder that he is “gwine on ihisyere, cyar,” and gladdest of all that the ear is supplied with icewater, a luxury that does not appear in his every-day life. When a colored people’s excursion is announced ice*, water is advertised as one of the attractions —Merchant Traveler.

Why He Hated Him.

“O, Gbarles, let us turn and go off some other way ; there is that bad man following us.” —_—ll'-W---* “Who is the fellow, my dealt?” . “Why, that is the man who was so near marrying me before I met you. I just hate*him.” “Bv Jove, so do L” —— - . “Yaas.” -“You don't know him. How can you hate him?" „ “He didn’t marry you, don’t yer knaw* my love.”—Texas Siftings. Talleyrand said that happiness depended on a hard heart and a. good stomach.

INTERNAL TAXES.

Report of the Operations of the Internal Revenue bureau for the ';; :y Past'Year. * - " The Commissioner of Internal Revenue has submitted his annual report to tbe Secretary of the Treasury. Tho total receipts from all sources of tuarnal-revenne taxation for the fiscal year ended June 30, 1880, were $110,902,809, an ’increase ovor the previous year of 4.481,748. The principal increase was inaigats, cigarettes, and spirits distilled from grain. The cost of collection daring the year was $4,299,485, being about 3.0 per cent, of the amount collected, against $4,455,430, or about 3.9 per cent, for the previous ye ir. It is estimated that $118,000,000 will be collected during tho current fiscal year. The number of illicit stills seized was 154, and 1,214 persons arrested therein. The seizures were principally in Georgia, North Carolina, Tennessee, Kentucky, and Virginia. The estimated expenses for the next fiscal year are $4,236,4-10, of whic h $1,900,000 is for salaries and expenses of revenue agents, surveyors, gaugers, store-keepers, etc., and $266,440 for salaries of ofticers aud employes of the Commissioner’s office, which includes an appropriation fer an additional chief of division and increase of force rendered necessary by the oleomargarine law. The number of stamps issued during the year was 550,061,029, and their value $135,112,305. The production account shows an increase in manufactured tobacco of 10,798,280 pounds; in the number of cigars and cigarette 5,433,507,247; i u tobacco exported, 29,369,220. The number of cigars imported was 73,139,078, and the value of manufactured tobacco imported was $68,939. The amount of 'direct taxes still due is $2,568,929. The number of distilleries registered was 6,422, and the number operated 6,031, of which 5,075 were fruit distilleries. The total spiritproducing capacity of grain and molasses distilleries in operation Sept. 1 wa5J188,747 gallons per day. ‘The total production of spirits during the year was 80,344,320 gallons, and T 9,195,332 bushels of grain were used. There were 868 violations of revenue laws reported during the year, for which 637 persons were arrested. The Commissioner recommends that the principle of taxation which applies to all other articles taxed under internal revenue laws be made to apply to distilled spirits. He also calls attention to the necessity of legislation to remove the present discrimination against retail liquor dealers in the matter of penalties of fine and imprisonment for doing business without payment of the required special tax, and the urgent necessity for the passage of the bill to amend the Revised Statutes by repealing the Section allowing collectors of internal revenue commissions on taxes collected on distilled spirits. '

M. COQUELIN.

France’s Most Celebrated Comedian. M. Coquelin, the great French actor, has determined to visit the New World next spring. He will open at Rio Janeiro, and play throughout South America. He then iifliends to vigit&the United States, but says that he does not expect much success in this country, as the people don’t

understand his- language, and,tjmh taste does not rtm in the direction- oMPreneh plays. When: he returns to Paris, he will act no longer ah the Comedie Francaise, but probably open at the Vaudeville, of which he is part owner. M. Coquelin’s visit to America will, be a noteworthy dramatic event. He ismowia his 43d year. •

NEEDS OF THE MILITIA.

Recommendations- M Army Officers Who Visited tlio State- Encampments. [Washington dispatch.! The reports of the army officers who were detailed to attend the annual militia encampments in Alabama, Maine, Michigan, New Hampshire, Minnesota, Missouri, New. York, Ohio! Kentucky, Pennsylvania, lowa, Illinois, Vermont, Massa. chusetts, Rhode-Island, Indiana, Kansas, Connecticut, and Dakota Territory have .just been made pubAe. While criticising details, such as lack of uniformity in. clothing, poor attendance at roll-calls, and a disposition to shirk guard duty and othei onerous duties of soldier life, the reports are unanimous in praising the fine physical qualifications of the men who make rip the militia, their excellence in drill and tactics,, and the earnest, manly efforts, of the officets to improve their 00mmauds- and maintain a high standard) of discipline. General complaint is made o£ the poor quality, ot the arms furnished the militia, consisting in great part of old, badly worn, and unserviceable Springfield and. Sharpe's rifles. Most of ihe organizations show much interest in the target practice and the Maine militia is especially commended ftor its marvelous skirmish fining. Several of the reports speak of the crying need of thorough systematic instruction, and it is suggested that the War Department detail officers, to report to the Governors of the various States, to be asj signed to duty as instructors solaly, with no j command whatever. It is recommended j; that closeijr neighboring Stakes accredit visitors officially to Slate encampments, whose doty it shall be to take notes and report upon matters of interest to the militia. More study is fouad to be necessary subalterns and the use of dummies ear blocks in tactical studies is urged.

The Lost Cord.

“Hear that piano—hear that piano?” “Yes.” • ~ “Old Snagsby’s daughter. They just do it to tantalize me.” “Why, it seems a very nice song. ‘The Host Chord,’ I believe.” “Is that the name of it?” “Yes.” ~ “Meaner and meaner! The cheek of them Snagsbys is something terrible! Here the old man stole half my woodpile last night, and his daughter’s singing about the lost cord, right under our noses! A soar mask—An old maid in love.

UNCLE SAM’S MAIL

Report or Hr. Vilas, Showing the Tear’s , - Operations of . the PostofflcA: Department. The Tear’s Postal Changes Mere than 22.000 .Changes, ofPostma jtpts During the Tear. . Tb%*eport of Postmaster General Vilas for fob fiscal year , ended June 30, 1886. says in immensity and extent of means, of -expenditures, of performances and results, the postal machinery of the United States exceeds—in some points far exceed* that of any other nation on the globe. The entire length of all railways employed by the United States nearly equals the combined extent of thoso of all other countries of the world, while the other post routes more than quadruple the total of any single people besides; and the mileage last year of our mail transportation exceeded by more than 125,000,000 miles the service rendered to any other government. Of postoffices no other nation has one-third our number. It is estimated that 100,600,000 more letters were mailed in the United States last year than in Great Britain! and nearly that number more than were mailed iu Germany, France, and Austria combined. The proportion to each inhabitant is estimated in the United States at 66, Great Britain 57, Germany 19. At the close of the fiscal year the total number of postoffices was 53,614, besides 497 branch offices. Of these 2,244 were Presidential offices, divided as follows: First class, 75; second class, 400; third class, 1,769. In the fourth class there were 51,370. Among all the offices 7,265 were money-order offices, besides 92 moneyorder stations. Concerning appointments the report says: “The appointments of Postmasters during the last fiscal year numbered altogether 22,747, of which 9,112 were made to fill vacancies occasioned or expired commissions, 587 to vacancies caused by death, 3,482 oh the establishment of new offices, and 9,566 (upon removals. Of the total number of appointments, 1,039 were made by yourself, the vacancies having occurred from the following causes, respectively—viz: By expiration of commission, 468; by resignations, 253; by deaths, 24; by removals or suspensions, 247; and to offices which had been assigned from the fourth to the third class, 47.” During the year the free-delivery service was extended to Aurora, 111.; Duluth, Minn.; and Newport, Ky. The total number of carriers was 4,840, an increase of 483. The total cost of this branch of the service was $4,312,306, an increase of $326,354 over the previous year. The work performed by the carriers is summarized as follows: “The number of pieces of mail matter, counting collections and deliveries, handled by the carriers during the year was 1,949,520,599, an increase over the previous year of 204,983,186, or 11.75 percent., while the carriers increased but 11.08 per cent, in number.” Tbe money-order system has been extended to 311 additional offices during the year, while 10 were dropped from the list. “During tbe year there, were issued 7,940,302. domestic orders, amounting to nearly $114,000,000; 5,999,428 postal notes, amounting to $11,718,000; and 493,423 international orders,, aggregating $7,178,786.21; besides the payment of foreign orders reaching a total of almost $4,000,000. The entire amount of fees received was $1,214,506.38, less by $2,869.60 than the previous year.” The act establishing the special-delivery system limited its privileges to 555 post- • Offices. Ihiring the full year of its-use—- ' to Sept. 30, 1886—1,118,820 letters were received for special delivery at these offices. Taking the full year, the total amount of fees received from this source was $84.782,. leaving a gross profit to the Government of $27,007. From the enlarged system, extending the privileges of the act to all postoffices and all mailable matter, the Postmaster General expects great results. The total revenues of the department for the year were- $43,948,422, and the excess of cost over revenue $8,254,157. Of the total appropriations for tbe year, amounting to> $54,183,642.14, the entire outlay actually.„mada.aa«i .estimated to be. made is buti $50,839,340.46, leaving a balance to be eventually covered into ihe Treasury of $3,344,301.68.

Letter-sheet envelopes, the report says,, have been long authorized, but no real attempt was made to introduce them until last October, when a contract was made with the owner ©f a patent, by which the department receives them without cost, andc pays for only what it sells, tip far the envelope appears- t«v find popular favor, but the Postmaster General thinks longer experiment desirable before recommending; the pumhase o£ the patent and tha manufacture by the Government. The- dead-letter office during tlife year handled 5,1)23,7.15 pieces of mail matter,! of which number 18(5,448 were delivered unopened: to tha proper parlies, and,3(53,373 1 foreign pieces were returned to the opuntry of origin.. Of those opened about one-half were destroyed as undeliverable on-value.-less. Letters to the number of 12.138,. containing money aggregating $21,7:52. besides 18,10-5 letters containing, drafts* checks,, or other instruments for the payment of money of the total face value of $1,121,154.74, were delivered to the ow.nei a. The neveime derived from dead letters which could not be restored to owners, and from auction sale of unclaimed parcels, amounted to $8,87^291 Postoffices Were reported robbed; to the number of 487, and 2(53 were , burned; 7(5 postal cars were burned or wrecked 27 mail stages and 7 mail messengers- were robbed. 70 pouches were lost, ami 127 reported stolen or injured. The records of the-inspectors show the following facts: “For violation of postal laws 6(50 persons w.ere arrested, of whom .243 were in the service and 417 were not; 110 were postmasters, assistants, or clerks, 14 railway postal clerks, 24 letter-carriers, 27 mailcarriers, and 11 of various employment. Seventy-nine burglars and 31 former postmasters are included among the arrests outside of the service. The State courts took jurisdiction of 54 eases and the Federal courts of 606. Of the latter convictions followed in 214, acquittals in 26, trial waits in 295, and the residue were dismissed or failed of indictment.” The story comes from Boston of a duds who, having been aßked to say grace at a formal spread at which he took a leading part, bo*ed his head slightly, languidly lowered his eyelids, and murmured, “Oh, Lord, thanks —awfully.” “Do you remember how you swore on your knees the night you proposed; love?” “Oh, that’s nothing.” “Nothing!" “Youonghtto hear me swear on my knees whan my col-lar-button drops and rolls under the washninr,3 tv ; ; •_ ■_ L_j -Ll ’ stand. The most shocking thing of all—The Oharieatoti earthquake.