Rensselaer Republican, Volume 18, Number 29, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 March 1886 — Life Studies. [ARTICLE]

Life Studies.

(Lige Browm in Chicago Ledger.] No man who loves anything good can be hopelessly bad. Keep the heart right and the feet will not go far astray. The survival of the fittest is the doctrine that always wins in a dog fight. In close application to business nothing on this footstool exceeds a mustard plaster. The man who worries about things that cannot be helped is sawing timber for his own coffin. It is human nature to most desire that which is hardest to obtain. No wonder everybody wants a postoffice. Sitting up with the girls is pleasant pastime, but rcnfember, young man, that it takes hog and hominy to keep house. In one respect a common two-cent postage stamp commands the respect of Boston. It can never be licked but once. “No wonder the Methodists are down on dancing,” said a gentleman, as he watched the dime museum cannibal going through the war dance. Somebody says the American type of manhood will steadily improve until it surpasses aW others that are or ever have been; all of which it would be dreadful hard to make a dude believe. “Life is full of reminders,” sings a gloomy gusher in a bilious exchange. It is, it is!—-and more especially so to the bald-headed boarder who is always finding reddish hairs in palish gravy.' A bachelor poet propounds the following conundrum: “What is warmer than a woman’s love?” In response to which a married prose writer would like to inquire: “What is colder than a woman’s feet ?”