Rensselaer Republican, Volume 17, Number 39, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 June 1885 — The Man with a Hose. [ARTICLE]

The Man with a Hose.

An ignorant, stupid man with a hose in his hand is the pest of the city. Besides flooding the sidewalks and making a mudhole of the nice dry gutters, he makes the stone pavements sink by undermining them, he washes the mortar out of the stone steps, and is an equivalent to six months of perpetual rainstorm. The artificial storm added to the six montlis of winter makes the rock and brick of most cities have a hard time of it. The rain-fall of the United States is about thirty inches a year; in the zone of the hired man it is not less than thirty feet. Under his care the pyramids of Egypt would last only a few summer-times. Chicago Current. • One of the saddest and most touching sights in li£e is that of a young man who has spent six months in coaxing and waxing a mustache into respectable size and shape, and then, in the .act of lighting a cigar with a slip of paper, burns and scorches the whole institution into an unrecognizable mass of singed hair. . A New Yobe paper mentions the fact that a lady once received a declaration of love on her eightieth birthday.’ Never despair, girls. While there’s life there’s hope.