Rensselaer Republican, Volume 17, Number 26, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 5 March 1885 — Page 2

BIDE A WEE, AND DINNA FRET. ' IS the-road very drsaryl Host will fee swwteHf thou art aweary, | And after the night cometh the morning hide a wee, and dinna fret. The clouds have silver lining, ■ n ' Don’t forget; And though ho’s hidden, still the sun i£ skinCourage I Instead of tears and vain repining. Just bide a wee, and dinna fret With toil and cares unending Art beset? Bethink thee how the storms from Heaven descending \ Snap the stiff oak, but spare the willow bending. I And bide a wee, and dinna fret Grief sharper sting doth borrow From regret; But jresterdav is gone, and shall Its sorrow Unfit us for the present and the. morrow? “ Halt bide a wee, and dinna fret. An over-anxious brooding Doth beget A host of fears and fantasies deluding: Then, brother, lest these torments be intruding. Just bide a wee, and dinna fret —Every Other Saturday.

“DID THE KNIGHTS ALL DIE OF TORE T" I was sitting jn my study. And the night was growing cold; I was reading from a story Of the noble knights of old. How they fought for fame and glory, And befriended weak and old, While the wind blew loud and stormy, And the snow fell still and oold. By the fire sat little Nora List’nlng to the tale unfold; Blue her eyes were, large and dreamy. And her hair like waves of gold. Then - we heard a feeble knooking, And the door I opened wide; . ,< “Can I come in," said a beggar, “From the cold by > our firfeslde?” And I answered him quite gruffly: “Go awayl” and closed the door: But my lit: le Nora whispered: “D.d the knights all die of yore?" :ack I called the poor old beggar, Bald: “Your pardon I implore; You are welcome to my fireside. Though i’m not a knight of yore." Golden Days.

THE LATE UNPLEASANTNESS.

Ben: Periey Poore’s Recollections of the Congreisic nil Debates Just Preceding the Rebellion. t The debates it} Congress in the winter oi 1860-61 were like the cracking noise heard at night on the banks of ioe-bonnd rivers, which is the precursor of a general “breaking up.” Senator Crittenden endeavored to throw oil on the troubled waters by the introduction of a series of compromise resolutions, but they came too late for acceptance by Northern men. Their principal feature was the constitutional establishment of slavery south of the latitude thirty-six degree and thirty minutes. A large number of the Northern people Were willing that the people of New Mexico should decide the question of slavery for themselves, but the Crittenden resolution would have provided that they should have slavery whether they wanted it or not The interest taken in the congressional debates was great, and attracted crowds to the Capitol. Senator Seward’s long-announced speech attracted crowds to the galleries of the Senate Chamber, and the flooi was crowded with privileged persons. Political friend and political foe, the most conservative and the most ultra, the abolitionist from Vermont, and the fire-eater from Mississippi, all looked hpon that pale, slight figure in a gray frock coat—-so calm, so self-possessed, so good natured—as the man who had but to speak the word and the country would be saved. The speech had been carefully composed and elaborated, as was everything which emanated from that source. It was in type before it was pronounced. The manuscript lay before the speaker on the desk, but it was delivered almost entirely through the power of his wonderful memory. Senators gathered closely around him, and anxiously caught every syllable as it fell from his lips. The speaker seemed the only tranquil Senator there It appeared incredible that any man could present an exterior of Buch coolness and quietude, and apparently smiling unconcern, amid anxiety and excitement so deep and intense. Mr. Seward was not a graceful orator, but there was a certain impressive manner corresponding with the importance of what he had to say, which arrested the hearer’s regard, and when he was evolving some w eighty maxim of political philosophy, and particularly during his vivid deliberations of the grandeur and power of the Union, and of the calamities which might follow its dissolution, every eye was fixed upon him. There were several quite dramatio passages in the speech, which roused tiie orator to more than usual animation. Such were the allusions to the gray-headed clerk of the Senate; the contrast of the man-of-war entering a foreign port before and after the dissolution of the Union, and the episode, where, enumerating by name the great men who had added glory to the liepublic, he said; “After all these have performed their majestic parts, let the curtain fall.” The speech was an ingenious piece of literary composition, which had been foreshadowed by a series of able editorials in the Albany Evening Journal, published as feelers of public opinion, and to prepare the way for this speech. It was the hand of Weed writing, bnt the ideas were from the brain of Seward. Andy Johnson, then a Senator from> Tennessee, spoke for two long days iri opposition to secession. His manner of speaking was peculiar to himyelf, and not very agreeable. He had/‘two distirt tones of voice, and they v,fere as opposite to each other as possible, and alternated so constuitly that an auditor who sh uld have heard without seeing him would almost have thought Ms speech was made by two different persona His manner was deliberate, and be spoke extempore, and sften in conversational tone, raising his voice to a loud pitch whenever he was particnla ly roused or earnest H« had all ciation, said “dessolution" for made so many (

gon. Who had attacked his former speeoh, was merciless and positively crushing. It was all the more powerful because Johnson went for Breckinridge and Lane in the last campaign, and defended them throughout Tennessee against charges of disunionism. Lane listened to the exposure of his glaring inconsistencies and present treasonable position with the air of a martyr who was being roasted over a slow fire. The Senate and the galleries enjoyed the scene greatly, for Lane had not many friends, and Johnson had him on the hip so completely, and flung him about so mercilessly, holding up his record of the previous year and in so many effective attitudes of contrast that it was overwhelming. Johnson also attacked the other secession Senators. His denunciation of their cause was unreserved, and his picture of the reign of terror which was inaugurated at the South was graphic and effective. He proved over again many of the positions of his former speech, which he declared not a single Senator had answered, except by inuendoes and sneers. He prodaced an immense mass of historical citations against secession, showing great research, and at one time there seemed to be several bushels of Congressional library books upon his desk, it John Sherman, of Ohio, made decidedly the best speech of the many delivered in the House of Representatives on the sitnation. His style was perfectly adapted to parliamentary debate, being singularly animated, argumentative, and rapid. His statements of doctrine as to the attitude of the Federal Government and the secession States were clearly and carefully defined, and' the rapid sweep of his eloquence, as he depicted the insults heaped upon the National flag of North and South alike by the secessionists, was effective in the extreme. The galleries were crowded to their utmost capacity by eager auditors, and but for the fact that the Senate was engaged in an exciting four-hours’ struggle over Mr. Holt’s confirmation, the floor of the house would have witnessed a large attendance of Senators. Mr. Sherman’s seat was directly behind that of Hon. Thomas Corwin, and the latter listened intently (a rare thing for him) to every word. .Frequently Sherman would leave his seat and advance some paces down the isle, in the fervor of his argument. towards the Speaker’s chair. It was fine to witness the ready and apt retorts which he made to the interruptions of members, which wereinoeSsant, and threatened at one time to degenerate into a mere colloquy, until the House insisted on Mr. Sherman being protected in his right to the floor. The most amusing of these was the New Mexican episode, already alluded to by telegraph. Mr. Sherman was describing the poverty and insignificance of the territory, about which Southern gentlemen were raising so unreasonable a row. He said it was filled with Mexicans, and Peons, and quadroons and half-breeds, when Miguel A. Otero, the semi-Spanish gentleman who represented New Mexico in Congress, sprang up fiercely, and stigmatized Mr. Sherman's words as a ma.’Kcioiis libel upon the people he represented. The littleVSpaniflrd was a young, tight-bnilt, creamy-faced gentleman,- with a fierce mustachio, and an elegant walkrng Stick. Instantly the House and galleries was in a roar of laughter. There stood the defiant Miguel, his brow knit, and his face dark with wrath, sputtering his charming broken English, and violently gesticulating in the direction of Mr. Sherman. There stood Sherman, calm as a summer’s morning, smiling at him with a deprecating wave of the hands, and assuring him he designed to cast no reflection upon his constituents, but simply to state the facts as to the races who constitute that population. He went on to say he was told by the census that there were but twelve negro slaves in New Mexico, with a large number of Peons and others, when Mr. Otero cried out, “The Peons are the gentleman’s peers.” The laugh was now on the other side, but was Speedily changed when Mr. Sherman instantly retorted, “The Peons are the peers of the gentleman, and they have a right to be, for they elected him,” and quickly passed pn with the argument. The Hon. Miguel sat fuming in offended dignity for a time, condoled with by Southern members (he was a strong pro-slavery man) and nursing his wrath, till it was eventually cooled off by a good supper at the National, where the honorable member for New Mexico boarded. There was no one who seemed to enjoy this ludicrous scene more hugely than the Hon. Tom Corwin, who shook with glee till his burly form rocked again. Mr. Sherman not only stood up for the Union in the Hohse, but when hostilities commenced he accepted a staff appointment, and was actively engaged in raising and .equipping troops. He wished to take the field, but was persuaded to remain in Congress, as the place where he could be the' most useful to the Union canse and to the Ohio troops. Sherrard Clemens, of the Wheeling District of Virginia, was the first Southern representative who spoke boldly against secession. He proved on the disnnionists that their scheme was long since matured, and would embrace the opening of the African slave trade, and consequent destruction of an the interest of Virginia in slavery. He quoted all the Abolitionists, English and America!!, upon the secessionists, showing both to be working to the same end, the dissolution of the American Union. He showed how the suicide of slavery was being precipitated, and its grave dug by the very men who had withdrawn from Congress to protect it more effectually. He told the South that if they fought till the last armed foe expired, they never could expect from the North the same guarantees for slavery enjoyed nnder the existing constitution. The speech was full of gems. It was nervous and energetic in manner, brave, incisive, at times terribly sarcastic and surcharged with earnestness and power. Coming from the source it did, it fell on the House and thronged galleries like a thunderbolt. All Union men thanked God and breathed easier, while among disnnionists was great wrath, His merciless invective, when he showed up the secessionists as playing directly

into the hands of the Abolitionists and all the enemies of free government all over the world, was a most bitter dose for some of them.* Many Virginia and Kentucky members were very restive, and tried to conceal their chagrin by lond laughing, talking and marching about the hall. Some fled totally, imitating the example of the secessionists. Clemens charged them with cowardly treeson to the common interests of the slave-holding States. He ptfid a beautiful tribute to Mr. Adams on the floor for seeking means of harmonizing difficulties. On the whole, it was the most brilliant speech in the House of the session, and it produced great excitement And admiration in an immense audience. , » Emerson Etheridge, of’* 1 Tennessee, seconded Mr. Clemens a few days afterwards. He was then about 40 years of age, tall and well-formed, with a face expressive of firmness and all solid and manly qualities. A lawyer by profession, he had a mind of great natural shrewdness, and the manner in which he parried the trusts of those who interrupted his speech evinced the possession of rare coolness, quickness, and skill. His speech, although totally different in manner and style from that of Mr. Clemens, was aimed at the same mark, and was a most powerful plea for the Union as it was a few short weeks before. Mr. Etheridge was more logical than Mr. Clemens, his speech was much better arranged and more effective, although less ornamented with the graces of rhetoric. There was a certain rugged, homely force, and a common-sense grasp of his theme and the facts relative to it, which were not so conspicuous in Mr. Clemens. These qualities, together with intense earnestness of manner, and an occasional burst of genuine eloquence, carried the House and the audience with him from the start, and it was quite impossible to repress the hearty applause which several times broke spontaneously forth.

Etheridge had got about half through his speech when a thin, piping voice proceeding from a weazen-faced little man, in a shrill tone demanded: “Will the gentleman allow me to ask him on which side he is speaking?” The Interruption came from Lake of Virginia, one of the border State disnnionists. The answer of Mr. Etheridge was a clincher. “I am speaking on a side which has few advocates on this floor, the side of my country.” The noble, exalted tone and emphasis in which this was uttered, rang through- tli& hall and afforded a strange contrast to the little shrill, piping accents of the questioner. Mr. Lake asked no more questions and the audience gave almost a shout of applause.

Owen Lovejoy, the rampant Illinois “abolitionist,” followed Mr. Etheridge. He was a man of considerable brains and a good deal of body; and his style of utterance was of the hyper-intense school. He began his speech at the top of a voice of most prodigious compass, and kept on in the same key, which it were a mild description to characterize as a roar. When some waggish member on the southern side cried “Louder,” the effect upon the audience was convulsing. There stood Lovejoy, with his coat off and his collar open, his big, bushy head thrown back like a lion at bay, and brandishing his arms aloft, while his whole body rocked and quivered with excitement, hurling his denunciations, not at the slave power this time, but at the secessionists. His tremenduous voice rang through the hall like the peal of a trumpet, and when he rose, as he sometimes did, to a strain of real eloquence, in describing the insults to our flag, it was truly fine to hear. The speeoh was wholly different from what had been expected of Lovejoy. He confined himself chiefly to the question of union and disunion, and made an intensely patriotic speech. Anson Burlingame had transplanted the Western style of oratory to Massachusetts, where he had married the daughter of a leading Whig, and entered political life through the Knownothing door. He did not have much . to say on the floor of the House, but he was an indefatigable organizer, and he rendered the Republican party great service as what is called in the English House of Commons a “whipper in.” He rather prided himself on being recognized as a man who would chivalrously defend himself if attacked, but he showed no desire for fighting when hostilities became inevitable, and he went abroad in a diplomatic capacity. Henry Winter Davis, of’ Maryland, Mr. Burlingame’s intimate friend, attracted a large audience to the house of representatives on the 7th of February, 1861. He was one of the youngest representatives, theatrical, anddemmonstrative, and he regarded himself , os the greatest orator in the capitol. While he was speaking a gust of wind swept over the capitol, and the fierce wrath of the elements made itself heard above the clear tones of liis voice. Suddenly a great crash was heard overhead, and the crowded galleries started with apprehension. It was feared the rpof of the house was about to blow off, and many rushed to the hall. In a moment it was announced that only a derrick had fallen, and the scared people came back again. It was a tempestuous scene for an hour or two. The air grew dark, and the gas was lighted overhead, while the loud roar of the tempest was heard, and the roof seemed to rock and tremble with the blast.

Toward night the wind became terrific. All through the streets was heard the banging of Bhutters, the sweep of the wild wind, and the shaking of frail awning-posts and trees. The national flag, which wa| flung to the breeze from the top of Washington monument, was torn from the staff and sent ffying. AH over the city, front hotel roofs and public buildings, and wherever the national colors were unfurled, they Wre torn in shreds by the fury of the wind, and a more general distribution of the star-spangled banner was never seen. Roofs were blown off,stables were shaken to pieces, chimneys were blown clown, and so wide and general was-thu. destruction of telegraph poles that no wire was left working south of Washington. v The foot passengers in the streets had a hard time of it: In every direction you could see them buffeting the blast, struggling against the keen, cold, biting snow, or drifting along tsfor*

the wind, blown in the desired direction with a momentum which was as unexpected as uncomfortable. Scores of hatless gentlemen were seen despairingly chasing after their fugitive chapeaux Up Pennsylvania avenue, and the little negro boys, whose native wool was proof against the gale, made small fortunes, in dimes and half dimes, by catching the truant tiles. Mr. Charles Francis Adams, then a representative from Massachusetts, who was known to enjoy the confidence of Senator Seward, echoed the New York Senator’s speech a month later in a philosophical disquisition, which was listened to by an attentive audience. Southern Representatives, with few exceptions, gathered over toward the republican side, in the center of which Mr. Adams Btood, and some of the extreme southern fire-eaters were attracted so toward him that they actually found themselves occupying the seats of the “black republicans.” The galleries were crowded with ladies and gentlemen, who listened with breathless attention. Shortly after Mr. Adams commenced, Edward Everett was escorted to a seat near the speaker, on the Republican side of the House, by Mr. Burlingame. Ex-Gov-enor Clifford, of Massachusetts, was invited to a seat on' the south side of the House by Mr. Maynard, of Tennessee. Mr. Richardson, Representative-elect ■of Illinois, was on the floor of the House, Under escort of Mr. Davidson, of Louisiana. Near Mr. Adams occupying members’ seats, were Robert C. Winthrop of Massachusetts, Cassius M. Clay of Kentucky, and George G. Fogg of New Hampshire, Secretary of the National Republican Committee. Mr. Adams was at that time bald and venerable id appearance, and he had an almost preternatural resemblance to his father, John Quincy Adams. His manner of speaking was quiet, even, and undemonstrative, and the whole power of his speech was in the burden of the argument alone. It was felt to be a masterly and comprehensive view of the national troubles, and his keen dissection of the ghost of “Northern aggression,” which had struck such terrors to the souls of our southern brethern, was terribly effective. He wielded the scalpel with the skill of a master, and when he had cut throngh all the flimsy pretexts which covered the cause of the disunionists, and held up their shadowy, grinning skeleton, jnst ready to crumble into the dust of nothingness, it seemed amazing that men should have believed in this hobgobliu as a grim reality. The southerners winced a good deal at certain passages. When Mr. Adams told them that their new southern republic would begin with setting 8,000,000 of its inhabitants to watch 4,000,000; when he said they were trying to dissolve the Union, not about a reality, but from a fear; when he told them that if they let this Union go, they would never get anything like such security again; when he showed them that they had already all the territory which they claimed; when he demanded, as to future acquisitions, “Are we going to fight because we cannot agree about the proper mode of disposing of our neighbor’s lands?” the effect of his shrewd, common-sense statements was palpable. The Republicans, as a general thing, were happily disappointed in Mr. Adams’speech. They had heard so much of his newly-developed “conservatism,” that he had come to be regard-' ed as a champion of the “letting down” policy. But, although the first part of his speech (which did embrace one weak point—the comparison of the South to the American colonies under George HI.) displeased, by its argument for consiliation as against coercion, some of the “irrepressibles," the conclusion satisfied all parties that there was no “letting down” in the son of the “old man eloquent” of Massachusetts. In one point, indeed, he went further than any—ono who fiatb hitherto spoken, when he declared he could not refuse the protection of the Federal Government to the oppressed and proscribed minorities, who were disposed to remain faithful to the Union in the secession of the States. On the whole, this great speech of Mr. Adams was conceded to have been the ablest effort of the session, and its vigor and ability greatly surprised those who had considered Mr. Adams (who seldom spoke) as a quiet, mediocre man, of no particular mark except traditionally. He received _a perfect ovation in the congratulation of those who heard him,after his speech. Edward Everett and Cassius M. Clay advancing at the same time to tender their congratulations.

Dancing and Praying.

A charming story is told in the memoirs' of Peter Cartwright, now little read and therefore worth producing. I have not the book with me, unfortunately, and therefore I write from my note book: Cartwright was once present at a country ball. A beautiful girl with golden hair came up to him and asked him to dance. “Dance with you, my dear, of course I will.” And he rose merrily and took his place among the dancers. But before the round began he spoke up cheerily and said; “My good friends, this lovely girl has asked mo to dance, and I have not refused. Beauty is one of God’s blessings, and who would be so rude as to refuse a blessing. This fair being has been kind to me, my friends; let ns get down on our knees, and thank God that he has been so kind to ns all.” The gallant Cartwright and the girl with thq golden hair set the example and the rest of the company followed, and the missionary soon had a revival meeting after his own heart then and there. f!."‘ ' " ■ ~

"Fine Italian Hand” Man.

j “Lets see,” he said, as he cautiously extended his hand for a shake, “didn’t I see you in Boston last spring?” “Perhaps.” " “Weren't you selling stock in a silver mine?” *»'.■■■.■ ■h —yes, I was.” >u in the same business now?" l My time is wholly occupied g a faro bank in Ch cage. I i that I had to get into feome i business or lose my characill Street Newt.

Hie Old Man’s Bone Felon.

Pop’s in a bad fix for work now. He is a sittin’ about ine house with a “botld fullnn” on his thumb ; and he’s a wishing that was a machine invented to cure it that wouldn’t hurt it, and wouldn’t co.it nothin’, He tried everything that anybody would name that was good for it. Maw she made him scald it in hot lye to set it back, but it never set it; then she turnee in and put a bar-grease poultice on it to draw it to a head, and that made it hurt wusser, and he taken it off; then she tried jim,-son-weed, and it ’peared to make it wusser still; then old Miss Freshours ’lowed the best thing ever she tried was house-leak baked in a pone of bread, and if that didn’t do to scrape a raw beet and wrap it up in it; and he tried ’em both and still it hurt Old Miss Strong came in and ’lowed a ingon poultice was the best of all, and he tried that; then old Sister Pinkney ’lowed hops made a powerful good ’un, and we’ uns made it; and old Miss Simmons ’lowed nothing wasn’t ekle to the plain old-fashioned mush poultice* and pap ’lowed:

“Well, for the land sake slap it on,” and I stirred it up quick, for pap was a hurtin’ turrible. Aunt Nance she come and wheeled in a poultice out’n sass soap and sugar and rossum; she know’d that was jist what it needed to draw the mizry out’n it, and was plum amazed that maw hadn’t thought about that. Then ’Squire Eoberson and his old ’oman came over, and the ’Squire ’lowed a bacon rind, or a rale fat piece of salt meat tied to it, would mighty quick fetch it to a head, and old Miss Eoberson ’lowed her rimmidy was honey and flour; and her and her old man had it up and down for a while as to which was the best. Pap he ’lowed: > “Put ’em both on, put ’em on, and put ’em on quick,” and he was a walkin’ the floor and a singin’, and Buddy he ’lowed it had orter be split, and it was a hurtin’ so Bad pap he turned around and told him to shet up his mouth. Maw she wanted to send after old Miss Green to come and cut it, and pap he ’lowed she shouldn’t doctor a dog for him. Then maw she told him to go on to the doctor then if he wanted to pay out all he was worth, but pap went on and had it opened and sot into Weedin’ and skeered us all mighty nigh into fits, but we got it stopped, and old Arminty Pendergrass she happened to step in and she ’lowed a mustard poultice would draw all that fire and fever out’n it, and pap put it on, he’d er put on anything, and I tell you it made him hop, and when Aunt Mahaly got here she was mad; she ’lowed: “If ’uns don’t stop a puttin’ so many fool things on that ar bone felun you are a gwine to pizen it, and information will set in, and the first thing you know it will be pitrified,” and she ontied it and looked at it, and everybody that come in on-tied it and looked at it. It is curis how folks alters wants to look at a sore. „ She ’lowed it needed burnt alum to aggravate all that proud flesh out’n it. She sprinkled it on and it set him afire,and he danced,he walked,he hollered, and would er had a fit but I turned in and washed it off and tjed it up, and pap he ’lowed; “Let it rest awhile.” Then I sot my foot down agin anything more gwine on it less the doctor said so, and wo’uns Was all afeared to wash that blood ofn it, feard it mought bleed agin*. So he turned in and went to the doctor, that big fat’n up thar about Munford some’rs, and he washed pap’s handlist washed it, mind you, and that was ever blessed thing he done it, and don’t you think he had the enshorance to charge $6. He lowed his price for washin’ of a hand was $8.50, but long as ’twas pap he wouldn’t charge him but six. Pap lowed if it had been his foot he reckoned he would havecharged him all he was worth, I tell you ma was mad; shorarredrand when ma rares.she rares. She was mad, ; and hopin’ mad at that, for old Miss Green wouldn’t have charged nothin’; leastways, she could have paid her in taters or sorghum, and she’d er washed it cleaner, too. “Six dollars!” says maw; “six dollars! Six dollars for what? For washin’ of a man’s hand, and never got it clean at that. Six dollars? Well, we'd all better Start out a washin* of hands,” and she grabbed a rag and scrubbed it good. ’Squire Eoberson laughed, and ’lowed it was worth $6 to git the dirt off’n it. “But he never got it oft,” says maw. I tell you it wasn’t no laughin’ matter to maw. But pap’s all right now; it, ain’t a hurtin’ of him, but he can’t pick no cotton, and it’s been so dry the cotton is openin’ monstrous fast, Our crops all prety good, but we afe afeard the taters is gwiue to be stringy. —Betsy Hamilton, in Atlanta Constitution.

The Way the Piano is Bought.

“Now listen to me, and I will teach yon some points about the piano business. Yon see, every woman knows all about a piano. If she don’t someone else does, or thinks so, and is sure to tell her. There’s a cool SIOO profit to us on a S3OO piano, if we get it; but we don’t; there’s the trouble. We have so divide, , just the same as if we were politicians. A lady comes into the store and says she wants to buy a piano. After trying every instrument in the place, and having ns try them, and getting all the prices, she says: ‘l’ll not make up my mind to-day. I’ll get my daughter’s music teacher, who knows all about pianos, to come down and try them.”

“Next day along comes the music teacher, with a card wliioh says she is from the Conservatory of Music at Milan. Why, I’ve had cards enough from old Milaners here to fill the conservatory, let alone leave rootn for teachers and pupils. Says the teacher, after I’ve got over the paralyzing effect of the card, Til be down to-morrow with Mrs. Sorand-So to pick out a piano. Of course I expect the usual commission.’ ‘Yes, ma’am,’ I say, TO per cent,’ and away she goes? Next day the buyer and teacher come and pick out a piano. The music teacher doe* some heavy standing around, tries every one opened and gives her opinion as wise as an owL Of course she can't tell the difference between a good piano and a poor one. ’Cause no one but a maker and tuner can. A good toner will get ; <:> ' • *

the same sound out of a s£9o puma Ur any one canrout of the best instrument made. That is, he will ,in a place ol moderate sum, 1 “You can’t tell anything about a piano by playing on it; only whether it is in tube or not. And the more you know about playing the less you are likely to know about pianos. Yes, sir; a cheap piano will sound as well as a good one. But how long will it last? That’s the question. That’s where 'the music teacher’s fooled. She’ll nose all around inside and look at the hammers bobbing up and down, and poke her parasol at the wires and run her fingers over the keys, and that’s all she knows about it. When she’s got through wasting our time she’ll advise the lady to buy the one nearest the lady’s price, quarrel with me about getting a music stool thrown in, and that’s all We have to give her 10 per cent for doing that, and, besides, she’ll want a commission on every bit of music the lady buys.” —Piano Dealer in San Francisco Post.

From a Japanese Sermon.

Miss Bird, a traveler in Japan, prepared a sermon preached in that country by a priest of the country, for an English paper, that shows how similar the domestic life of the Mongolian, in its mental phases at least, is to the home of the Caucasian. The text, taken from the Chinese classics, was; “That which is evil, be it but small, do it not, that which is good, be it but small, fail not to do.” The preacher, very much in the same strain as a Christian clergyman would if on the same subject, showed how much evil can result from very small beginnings. “Take as an example," said he," the way a husband calls his wife. Should he summon her with a pleasant ‘Here, good wife,’ she will reply with a soft “Ay, ay.’ “Now take the opposite case. “Husband—What are you pottering about there ? Just stir about will you ? These short days, too! “Wife—l know the days are short, and that is just it. If any one comes to ,the door I have to answer, and the washing to do besides, and I havent five or six hands to do it, have I ? “Husband—Are you going to give your husband any of your ill chat? “Wife—Well, what are you doing hugging that fire box all, instead of lending me a helping hand now and then? “Husband—What’s that ? Now, look here. . I’m not an ox, I’ll have you know. You are not going to put your rope through my nose and lead me all over the place.” And so they go on. He, a fine strapping young fellow, and she a sweet-looking young girl, now red, now green with passion. “Such a hubbub,” the preacher says, “all for want of a litt e care over the small politeness of daily life.” Human nature seems very like the world over, and one feels as if this quarreling was a sarlly faithful copy of what one might hear in an American cottage where things had gone wrong, and the Christian maxim bad been forgotten : “Bear ye one another’s burdens.”—Phrenological Journal.

The Average Age of Animals.

The average age of cats is 15 years; of squirrels , and hares 7 to 8 years; a bear rarely exceeds 20 years; a dog lives 20 years; a wolf 20; a fox 14 to 16. Lions a far long-lived, the one by the name of Pompey living to the age of 70. Elephants have been known to live to the age of 400. When Alexander the Great had conquered Porus, King of India, he took a great elephant which had fought valiantly for the king, and dedicated him ■to the sun, and let him go with this inscription : "Alexander, the son of Jupiter, dedicated Ajax to the sun.” The elephant was found with the inscription 350 years after. Pigs have been known to live to the age of 20, and the rhinoceros to 29. A horse has been known to live to the age of 62, but averages 25 or 30. Camels sometimes live to the age of 100; stags are very long-lived; sheep seldom exceed the age of 10; cows live about 15 years. Cuvier considers it probable that whales sometimes live 1,000 years. The dolphin and porpoise attain the age of 30; an eagle died at Vienna at the age of 104; ravens have frequently reached the age of 100; swans have been known to live to the age of 300. Mr. Masterton has the skeleton of a swan that attained the age of 200. Pelicans are long-lived. A tortoise has been known to live to the age of 107 years.

Original Proverbs.

Truth advertised for an original proverb. Many hundred? were sent in. Here are some of the best: A white lie often makes a black story. It’s a poor musician who can’t bio# his own trumpet. He who would eat the egg must first break the shell. Every back has its pack. The man who wisues to continue believing in his friends should never put them to the proof. Hens and ink out of reach avoid many a breach. Look after your wife; never mind yourself—she-’ll look after you The present is the child of the past and the parent of the future. The want of money is the root-of much evil. Egotism is an alphabet with one letter. If you’d know a man’s character, follow him home. Better a line of Bense than a page of nonsense. Men love women; women love a man. The surest road to honor is to deserve it Only whisper scandal and its echo is heard by all. It’s pot the Clock with the loudest tick that goes the best bigba are poor things to fly with. Home is the rainbow of life. Don’t complain of the baker until yon have tasted bis bread. They whlo live in a worry invite death to hurry: - When girls grow fond, the men abscond, etc. What is said to be; the knife of the gnidotine with which Marie Antonette’s head was cut off is now in Mpe. Tussaud’s collection in London His in the form of a collar, or circle of iron, and will weigh twenty five pounds. The collar is cut horizontally, each half containing a knife or blade. When used, the upper half was allowed to fall between two upright standards, .striking the neck, which across the blade of the lower.