Rensselaer Republican, Volume 16, Number 45, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 July 1884 — Overfamiliarity. [ARTICLE]

Overfamiliarity.

The approaches of overfamiliarity are most insiduous. So must they come in disguise. The enemy may not be known until within the walls. The first entrance lies in some form of expression denoting lack of respect for the opinion of another. There may be much familiarity in tone and gesture as well as what are termed more demonstrative acts. There is a preceptible modulation and intonation of the voice, which conveys an extreme deference from that of the more unconsidered, every day manner. There arp inflections for conveying extreme interest, or mere interest, or a partial indifference, or indifference and from there down to contempt, of which one or the other of many a married and unmated couple are but too well aware. It is a bad symptom, and the first faint precursor of the cooling of the lover’s ardor when the husband, with more or less irritation in his voice, bids the wife “hurry up,” be the hurrying up in the process Of dressing for the theater or or the ascension of the “L” road stairs.

The nearer, the more tender, the more delicate the relationship between parties, the greater care is demanded in avoiding that overfamiliarity which expresses contempt for opinion. Be the opinion expressed by another entirely wrong, beyit even no opinion at all, but a statement or assertion based on a dishonest intent, there should be the greatest care before it is met with a sneer. Respect and dignity on one side beget respect and dignity on the other. The reverse is also, unfortunately, true. When a conversation degenerates into a squabble, bo h parties suffer common damage in loss of respect for each other. But in numberless instances, and especially in the marriage relation, after a little, the man has little but a sneer for the opinion of a woman. Uncon* sciogsly he falls into the habit of deeming his opinion on every possible subject to be superior to that of his partner, and the only region in which he may allow her to express hersdf “unsnubbed” is in that regarding matters he holds in contempt as belonging exclusively to the woman’s world. His sneer may be veiled, but it is none the less a sneer. There is the affectionate sneer, the patronizing sneer, the supe-rior-being sneer,-the half-pitying, halfcaressing sneer; and behind these the darker, heavier, and blunter sneer—the sneer of indifference, of irritation, of contempt “Familiarity breeds contempt.” An old adage but hone the less applicable to new generations.

A VißGTKiAjpri married a tramp who turned out to be a Duke. We’ve no pity for her. She should have known what he was before she married him.