Rensselaer Republican, Volume 16, Number 16, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 December 1883 — PITH AND POINT. [ARTICLE]

PITH AND POINT.

[From the Fort Wayue Hjosierj Side issces—cash from jour vest pocket. Isn’t it strange that wherever a woman goes her corset stays ? Two tramps in a bushel basket rep- 1 rent two-four time in music. Two beats to the measure, you know. When Greek meets Greek there may be a tumble in Greece, but the oleomargerine market will remain unchanged. An exchange says “it’s comforting to know that a bee can only sting once.” But tlte deuce of it is, there are so many bees. “Whew!” exclaimed a visitor entering the editor’s sanctum, “this room is as hot as an oven.” , “It is one," was the reply, “for here I make my bread.” _ Mb. Tackenphast sometimes has a very supercilious way. The other day he entered a grooery on Berry street and asked: “How are these apples; are they fit for a hog to eat?" “Don’t know, I’m sure; try ’em and see..” said the grocery man. This is terrible! New York society, in wondering why,Miss Carrie Astor should marry George Gould, seems tp lose sight of the faot that it is probably because Gould Astor. (Readers ■yho cannot see that Astor mean* “asked her” may us cigars.) [From Carl Pretzel's Weekly^ A foot rule — Keep yon toe-nails trimmed. - A dwelling house in this oity was recently gutted. Tho liver wont out and took the lights with them. When the average condemned murderer goes to heaven, we suppose it is not improper to say that he is roped in. “Live and let live” is the motto of the robber who is always willing to let you live in some other world if he is let live in this. A woman just before marriage is a blushing bride. One year after marriage the blush appears on the end of the husband’s nose. “My father has something on his house that you father ainfc got,” said a little boy to his companion. "What is it ?” he earnestly asked. “A mortgage.” . Many delight in reading Bunyan’s Pilgrim’s Progress, but he never made half the time that a certain Little Rock pilgrim made from a neighbor’s henhouse, propelled by a bull dog*s locomotion. “Who’s that man and woman across the street ?” asked Jones of his friend Smith. “Man! Woman! Heavens, Jones, don’t parade your ignorance! In this age of progression we have no man or woman 1 That is our nurse ladv and onr errand gentleman.”— Vila Ophir. A gentleman of this city recently lost his wife. Soon after he was taken very ill and he narrowly escaped the grave. Upon his recovery he was married, and on being Congratulated by his friends for having recovered his health replied that “a widower naturally rewives.” • *