Rensselaer Republican, Volume 16, Number 11, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 November 1883 — Failed to Comprehend Exactly. [ARTICLE]

Failed to Comprehend Exactly.

He was a pompous! well-dressed, fineiooking man, and came pounding into the office like a cyclone going up grade through a trestle work. He wanted to know where the edito#Was. “l am that citizen,” responded a man over in the corner with a half-cocked pair of scissors in his hand. “Oho; you are, are you? Well, get ready, for I’m going to clean your disreputable office out!” roared the visitor. “You don’t say so,“ placidly responded the man with the scissors, looking around the room. “I’m mighty glad to know it, for we’ve keen too busy to attend to it ourselves. Here’s a dust-rag; you can begin over in that corner by the window, and if you get stuck you ■ will find a shovel and- a wheel-barrow out in the back yard, which may be of some assistance to you. When you get through the bookkeeper will settle —“ “Settle, thipider . and lightning! I propose to do the settling myself. ” “Ah, indeed! That will relieve the bookkeeper then. ” “Listen' to me,” now fairly shrieked the ponderous visitor; “I’ve been insulted, and I propose to sweep the floor with you. With you, sir!” “What’s the matter with the broom ?” inquired the smiling editor. “You infamous scoundrel, can’t you understand what lam here for ? I propose to give you a threshing, sir.” . “Is your threshing machine run by steam or horse power, and will you give me a threshing of wheat or oats ? You are very kind, sir, to thus proffer a poor editor so much of your w-orldly store.” “What are you talking about, anyhow. I thought you had some sense. I am here, sir, to whip you like a cur.” “Oh, I beg your pardon, sir; I thought your visit was of an entirely different nature. I presume, sir, you will wait until I can go down stairs and retm-n.” “Certainly, sir; when I whip a man I do it like a gentleman.” “Thank you, sir; just sit down, please, and read anything on my desk.” And then, as he closed the door, continued : “I’ll be back sometime within the next three months, Ta, ta, sweetheart. ” When the irate victor next saw the editor he was in mch a good humor that he asked him to take a drink.— Merchan t- Tra celer.