Rensselaer Republican, Volume 16, Number 11, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 22 November 1883 — A Profitable Vacation. [ARTICLE]

A Profitable Vacation.

“Well, sir,” grinned a dry goods clerk, as he met a friend in the smoker, and both lighted up. “Well, sir, I’m on my way home after four weeks of the most delightful vacation I ever spent; and it hasn’t cost me a dollar!” “How did yon work it?” asked the other, enviously. “I went first to see a cousin of my mother’s, a minister, got there on a pass, and after I'd been there a week got drunk, went to church, and raised thunder. He gave me money to go somewhere else, and I dropped down . on an old aunt of mine—any quautity ■of fun. When I got ready to go, I commenced making love to the servant girl, and the old dame staked me, and packed me off.” “That’s doing pretty well,” sighed his friend, who had spent nis last dollar at Saratoga. “Then I went to see my grandfather. I didn’t think the old man was very proud of me when I arrived; but he let me in, and I hustled him around for another week. Finally I asked permission to invite a dozen fellows to help me •enjoy myself; and he gave me a hundred enough!””ex3aimed his admiring friend. “That brought me around to my brother-in-law’s place; and he did well by me until I got tired of it. So I told him I thought of going into business in that town and living with him. The proposition brought another hundred; nnd now I’m on my way home, restored to health, and about 300 ahead. How’s that ? Wait till I strike a station, and I’ll set ’em up.” And the foolish youth, who had squandered his substance at the Springs, pondered deeply on the wisdom of liis brother, and down in his mind set up jobs for the next season.— Elevated Railroad Journal.