Rensselaer Republican, Volume 16, Number 9, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 November 1883 — CONQUERINC A HUSBAND. [ARTICLE]

CONQUERINC A HUSBAND.

“Uncle Phil has been lecturing me again!” exclaimed Mrs. Marian Dykes, wt her husband came home to tea. one evening. “I cannot, and I will not, stand it any longer,” and the young wife dropped into a chair as though the last remaining portion of her strength had left her. 14 What was the subject of the lecture, my dear,” inquired Mr. Dykes, with a cheerful smile, as though he did not regard the situation as at all desperate. “You know very well that Uncle Phil has but one subject.” “And that is extravagance, or the reverse, economy,” added Mr. Dykes. “Of course that was the subject of the lecture; and you always take his aide of the question. Uncle Phil has ten times as much influence with you as I have. Whatever he says is right, and whatever I say is wrong,” retorted Mrs. Dykes, rather warmly. “If supper is ready, I think we had better attend to that next; and we shall have the whole evening to discuss Unde Phil’s lecture. The subject will keep for awhile.” “But Uncle Phil will be here to take part in the discussion; and that is just what I don’t want. He overshadows me entirely when he says anything, and I might as well hold my tongue as speak,” pouted the wife. “Uncle Phil will not be here, Marian, It is half-past six, and he has to go to a church meeting at seven.” “Very well, but lam going to have something done this time. I won ? t have Uncle Phil here any longer. If he is to stay in this house I shall not.” Mrs. Dykes was very young, and her angry pout, as she sailed out of the loom, made her look decidedly pretty; at least so thought her husband. But before she was fairly out, the door opened and Uncle Phil came in. The door was ajar and he must have been in the hall during some portion of the lady's severe remarks about him. But he looked as placid as though earth had no sorrow for him. He was a man of fifty, though his hair and beard were * white enough for seventy. He did hot seem like a man who could be very disagreeable if he tried.He had a deaconish look about his face, that of a serious though not austere man. Certainly no one would havje taken him for a shipmaster, but he had spent most of his life at sea or in foreign parts. He used to read the Bible to his crew every Sunday, and never allow any swearing or other bad language in his presence bn board ship. Though he was a “psalm-singing skipper,” no captain was ever more popular with his men than Captain Dykes. Uncle Phil had been married in early life, but his wife died while he was absent on a long voyage. He had recently given up the sea, and retired to his native town, now an important place of 10,000 inhabitants. He found himself a stranger there, but at his own request his nbphew had taken him as a boarder. The gossips were not a little bothered to determine shipmaster was rich or poor. He engaged in every church and benevolent enterprise, and contributed moderately of his means. Charles Dykes had opened a store in Trippleton a year before, and everybody thought he was doing well. Mrs.Dykes thought so, though Charles himself insisted that he was not making money very rapidly; he could not tell how much until he balanced his books and took account of stock. In the main he was a prudent and careful young man, or at least was disposed to be so. Uncle Phil made a hasty supper, and then went to his meeting. He acted just a little strangely for him, though the smile had not deserted his face. He said less than usual, and seemed to be thinking very earnestly about sometiring. “Do you suppose he heard what I said, Charles ?” asked Mrs. Dykes,when ■ Uncle Phil had gone*T think not; hut you ought not to say anything behind Iris back that you not say to his face,” replied the husband. "Uncle Phil is a good man, <me of the salt of the earth.” “He is altogether too salt for me. If 1 should put, too much salt in the doughnuts, you would not like them. Uncle Phil is salter than Lot’s wife.” “I am sorry you don’t like him, Marian.” “I can't like a man who is continually tripping me up, and lecturing me upon economy. You ought to know better than he does what you can afford.” “I am sure that nothing but his interest in us prompts him to say anytiring. If one means well almost anything can be excused.” , “When I said that I wished you would keep a horse so I could ride out every day or two, he read me a lecture half •n hour in length. Whether he heard jne or not, I said just what I meant. -You must get him out of the house in •ome way, Charles. Take your clerk -to board, and tell your uncle you must JJlftV© t>u6 rOOIll.” j “If I tell-him to go, I shall tell the jreMon why I do so.” "I am willing to bear all the blame. £ don’t want any one in the chouse to

come between me and my busband,” said the lady with a deal of spirit. “Uncle Phil does not come between you and me, Marirn. That is absurd. “I have asked you, and even begged you a dozen times, to keep a horse. Uncle Phil takes Sides with you against me.” ° • - ', ' , “But he never said horse to me in his life. I can’t afford to keep a horse.” “Yes, you can, Charles. They say that you are doing more business than Tinkham, and he keeps two horses; and his wife looks patronizingly down upon me from her carryall when she meets me in the street,” added Mrs. Dykes, with considerable bitterness in her tone. . .. . u/-/'. : ■

“I know nothing about Tinkham’s business, and I do know something about my own,” replied Mr. Dykes. Before the supper were removed Charles Dykes had promised to buy a horse and buggy. It appeared to be the only way in which he could induce his wife to allow Uncle Phil to remain in the house. Doubtless he was weak to yield the point against his own judgment. Ip the evening ’Squire Graves made a friendly call, Mrs. Dykes was very glad to see him, for he had a lady’s horse to sell. It was just the animal she wanted, and as she- had? conquered her husband once that day, she intendep to have the horse trade settled that evening. “Glad to see you, ’Squire; anything hew- ?” the young merchant began, doing the usual common-places. • “There is news, but I suppose you have heard it,” replied the visitor. “I haven’t heard anything; what is it?” “Haven’t you heard that Tinkham has been attached?” “Tinkham! Is it possible?” exclaimed Mr. Dykes, glancing at his wife. “It’s a fact; a Keeper was put in his store this afternoon, and an attachment put on his horses and carriages.” “That was all because he ke’pt two horses when one was enough for him,” interposed Mrs. Dykes. With her the moral was between two horses and one. Before the squire left ho had sold his lady’s horse. Mrs. Dykes was perfectly happy, and her heart began to warm even toward poor Uncle Phil. When the retired shipmaster came in from the meeting, there were a dozen things she wanted to do for his comfort. The lady had beaten her husband and his uncle, and she was satisfied. Before breakfast the next morning Squire Graves’ man led the.horse over and put him in the little stable. One of the clerks was to take care of him. Uncle Phil saw the purchase, but he said nothing unpleasant. He looked the animal over, said he was worth the hundred dollars to be paid for him in goods from the store. Marian even though she liked Uncle Phil then. —He did not prophesy any evil or disaster. After breakfast the lady thought she would drive over to her father’s, in the next

She returned in season for dinner. But Uncle Phil did not come down to that meal. The lady rang the bell a second time, but with no better result. Uncle Phil evidently did not hear the bell, for he never kept the table waiting for him. The door was wide open, and she went in. The shipmaster was not there. His trunk was not there; the picture of the Seabird, in which he had sailed many a voyage, had been taken from thewall. Was it possible that Uncle Phil had gone without even saying good-bye to them ? There was a letter on the table. It was addressed to “Mr. and Mrs. Charles Dykes.” With the letter in her hand she hastened down to the din-ner-room. To say that she was astonished and chagrined, would not half express her feeling. “Uncle Phil had gone!” she exclaimed. “He has left for good, bag and baggage.” She tossed the letter upon the table, for she had not the courage to open it. “Then I suppose you are quite satisfied, Marian. You have got the horse, and got rid of Uncle Phil,” said Mr. Dykes, greatly grieved to learn that the worthy man had gone; and he saw that he must have heard he impulsive words of Mrs. Dykes the evening before. Mrs. Dykes dropped into at the table, and burst into tears. Just as -she had become •reconciled to ‘ the boarder, he had fled without even a word of explanation. She intended to treat him with the utmost kindness and consideration, as a noble warrior treats a fallen foe. Just then she felt as thought she would be willing to lose the horse to regain Uncle Phil. Charles opened the letter. It was very short, but there was not a particle of bitterness in jt. He should still pray for them, and desired to do all he could to serve and make them happy.

“I will go to him and beg him to come back, Charles!” exclaimed the weeping wife. You will never forgive me'.” - “I am very sorry he has gone, but I will not hate you, Marian. We will call upon him this evening at the hotel.” They did. call. Uncle Phil was exactly the same as he had been before. He was glad to see them, and there was not a particle of change in his tone or manner. Both Charles and his wife tried to say something about his leaving their house; but he headed them off every time. He would not permit the matter to be mentioned. They went home, unable even to get in an apolyy. Both of them missed the kindly words and wholesome advice of the good man, though Mrs. Dykes would not acknowledge it. His good influence upon both was lost. Even Charles became reckless in his finances. _ The close of Tinkham’s store! brought more business to the young merchant for a time, though the bankrupt’s successor soon made things exciting for him. A ruinous competition followed. No longer restrained by Uncle Phil’s prudent counsels, Charles branched out, and grasped more than he could handle. At the end of the year the balarfcesheet was not pleasing to look upon. Then fallowed a reckless attempt to recover lost ground. Notes at the Trippleton Bank became very troublesome. One of them was given for a new piano. People said Dykes was living too fast. The young merchant was worried. ’ T-'

had yielded to ene extravagancy and there was a long train behind it. His next balance-sheet showed that he was three thousand dollars in debt, and his stock was not worth half the sum. He saw that he must fail. After supper, one evening, he told his wife all about it. It would be a terrible humiliation to fail, as Tinkham had; and poor Marian wept as though her heart would break. In the midst of the scene Uncle Phil walked into the room, as he always did, without the ceremony of knocking. He often called. “Uncle Phil, l am going to fail, for I cannot pay a note of four hundred dollars that falls due to-morrow ” said Charles, bitterly, when he saw that he could not conceal the facts from the good man. “How much d 6 you owe in all, Charles?” asked Uncle Phil. “About three thousand dollars,” groaned Charles. “Will three thousand put you on your feet, solid?” “Yes, sir; but I can't raise three hundred.”’. ” “I will give you a check for three thousand in the-morning. I will be at the store at eight o’clock. I noticed that vOu have looked worried lately; but you said nothing to “I could not say anything to .you, uncle ; and I cannot take your money, after what has happened.” “Nothing has happened yet, and with the blessing of God, nothing shall happen.” Uncle Phil would not tinderstand him. “You may help me on one condition,” added Charles, after some discussion. “And that is that you will come back and live with us.” Marian joined in insisting upon this condition, and the good man yielded. He used no reproaches; he would not even say, “I told you so.” The note was paid the next day, and in the evening Uncle Phil was domiciled in his old apartment, quite as happy as the young people. o Charles sold the lady’s horse, the buggy, the piano, and other extras, and reduced all his expenses to a very reasonable figure. Marian was happy again, and did not believe there was any too much salt about Uncle Phil. She had given up the business of conquering a husband. In fact, both of them have come to believe that neither should conquer, or try to conquer, the other. After a while it came out that Uncle Phil Was worth at least fifty thousand dollars. Doubtless the church and the missions will get some of it ; but it is probable that Charles Dykes will be remembered, though both he and his wife sincerely hope that the good man will live till he is a hundred.— Good Cheer.