Rensselaer Republican, Volume 15, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 24 May 1883 — PITH AND POINT. [ARTICLE]

PITH AND POINT.

A* exchange says: “Hay smells the sweetest after it is cut.” In that respect Limburger cheese cannot compete with hav. v i - Truth tells of a sculptor who had to make the.limbs of all his Yenuses remarkably thiq because his wife was very jealous. A debating society will tackle the question: “Which is the most fun—to see a man try to thread a needle or a woman try to drive a nail ?" Miss Bbown married Mr. Sorrow. It is supposed that their children will be all twins, for you know that sorrows never come singly.— Grit. Accobding to botany—or perhaps it’s natural history—there is such a bird as the horned lark. How many horns does it take to make a lark?— Cheek. “Yes,” said Brown, “Stalker is a great actor. He is possessed of real talent. “And he hides it so perfectly 1” added Fogg, in sympathetic admiration. “Jane, light the gas.” “Please, sir, the gas is lit.” “Oh, so it is. Well, bring in a candle; my gas bill has just come in and I want to look at it. ”—Fhiladelphia News. The girls have taken to making patchwork quilts. Now it is tb be hoped that the piano will be shut, and that we will have peace, as well as piooes, in the honse. “I like your new hat very much,” he said. “It s chic; there’s a sort of abandon—” “There isn’t any sort of a band on it,” she said, pouting. “It’s a real ostrich feather. ” “No,” said a New York belle, who had just returned from a tour of Europe and Egypt. “No, I didn’t go to the Red sea. Red, you know, doesn’t agree with my complexion.” “Yes,” said the mother of a daughter, “I shall stop Mr. Tommy’s oallmg without any trouble or unpleasantness. I shall merely ask him to stop to dinner and then invite him to carve. ” A snow-white .hen in Arkansas hatched out five black chickens and killed every one of them as they left the shell. She didn’t want, the ot .er hens to eye her suspiciously and talk about her.— Duluth Tribune. “Haven’t you got another house you can rent me V” asked a Little Rock man of a real-estate man. “Whats the matter with the one you are in?” “Nothing, only I am behind with the rent, and I thought that by moving into Another one of your houses you would forget the old debt while trying to collect the new.”

It is said that in Spain butter is put up in an ulster the same as sausage is in this country, and sold by the yard. That may be ail right in Spain, but here in this country some of the butter would be found so strong that it would have to be drilled and blasted with dynamite to blow off a yard when ordered. —Feck’s Sun. An image of the human head has been found one hundred and five feet below the surface in an lowa town. It is regarded by some as the work of prehistoric man, and by many as the petrified head of some man who must have been blown so high by an lowa cyclone, that when he struck he went under the surface that distance.— Feck’s Sun. Extract from a modern novel: “She had thrown her heart at his feet only to be rejected. What greater punishment can any woman have to bear?” Well, he might have picked up her heart, carried it home and given it to his dog, or he might have put his foot upon it and gr-r-r-ouqd it into dust. Or, worse stiH, he might have lifted it up tenderly, placed it in his coat-tail pocket, married her next day, and made her work in a shirt factory, while he fooled away his time and money in a pool-room. That would be something like punishment. The proprietor of a menagerie issued a placard offering 100 thalers to any one who would enter the cage of the lion. Toward the end of the performance .a peasant walked up to the liontamer and said: “Sir, I have come to earn the 100 thalers.” General horror. The lion-tamer replied, with a derisive sneer: “So you want to go into the lion’s cage?” “Aye, sure,” said the peasant. “Oome on, then! There, I will open the trap-door for you and you can step in.” “Well, yes,” answered the honest countryman, turning to the audience with a broad grin on his face, “I am going in, but the beast will have to come out first. You know, the paper only says: ‘ Any one going into the cage shall have 100 thalers.’” Ro&rs of laughter and deafening applause.— Slrasburger Hinkenae Bote.