Rensselaer Republican, Volume 15, Number 32, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 April 1883 — The German Barber. [ARTICLE]

The German Barber.

New York Sun. “Where is the Monkey Barber?” “He is lait up from fooling mit an Inglish choke —dot kind of a rittle vere von vord means ohoost der same und someding different alretty. Dere comes in a man und to me says, ‘You peen marrit, ain’t it?* ‘Yes,’ I says, ‘a leetle vonce.’ ‘Ven is your vifenot a lady has der dime?’ Veil now I peen pizzy too much to vaste much dalk on such nicker minstrel dings so I says, ‘I gif it right avay.’ ‘Your vise is in der day time a lady,’ says he, ‘but not at night, pecause offery night she is a-bed.’ ” “Dot monkey parber he had to vent und fool mit dot choke. He goes right avay over to der beer saloon und sees der engineer from der comer arount,unt says to him, ‘Your vise is no lady unt I can broofit’ Dot chentleman he vent on choost like a pile drifer, and chumped on der parber’s neck and chucked him around vonce. He sent for me, and so soon I reokernized him, I sayt: “ ‘Ah, ha! I dolt you ho. If you fool yourself mit some pums you peen to gatch fire.’ ”