Rensselaer Republican, Volume 14, Number 2, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 29 September 1881 — Porterhouse Steak. [ARTICLE]

Porterhouse Steak.

Burlington Hawkeye. At the restaurant—“ This is the porter-house, is it?” asked the sad passenger, sitting at the corner table in the restaurant. “Yes, sir.” said tne waiter, with the weary air of a man who was tired of having to tell the same lie a thousand times a day, porternouse steak, sir; same as you ordered, sir.” “Do you cut porterhouse steak from between the horns this year?* asked the sad passenger, with the tuonation of a man who wanted to now. “Sir?” said the waller. “It eemed tc be a trifle tenderer last year,” the sad passenger went on, with the air of a man indulging in pleasant reminiscences of the past, “blit I remember, now; It was cut a trifle lower down then. Last year you cut your porterhouse steaks from the curl iu the forehead, and the sirloins from the shin. But I think this comes from between the horns. I used to live in a boarding-house where they cut the porterhouse between the horns, and this one reminds me of them. Animal dead this steak came from?” “Dead,” echoed the astonished waiter, “of course, sir. He was butchered, sir.” “Butchered to makea Roman holiday,’ sighed the sad passenger. “He would be more likely to make a Roman swear. Well, it was time he was killed. He hadn’t many more years to live on this earth. Ab, here is the brass tip from one of his horns. Dropped into the steak, no doubt, while you were slicing it off. What do you do with these steaks when the guests ■are' through with them? The waiter looked puzzled. “Why, sir,” he said, “they hain’t nothihg left of ’em when customers gets through with ’em sir.” “Possible?” said the sad passenger, “what nerves. “What?” .he. said: “the customers eat them up.” The sad passenger looked up with au air of interest. “Incredible,” he exclaimed;” can not.acoept your statement without proof. They may hide them under their chairs, or secrete them in their

nßf>kin*,or they may carry them away in their fWckets to throw at burglars, but I can not believe they eat them. Here, let me aee one of them eat this, and I will beUev you. Trust me, good waiter, I ” But the waiter had disappeared.