Rensselaer Republican, Volume 13, Number 22, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 17 February 1881 — Little Jakie Jones. [ARTICLE]

Little Jakie Jones.

Detroit Free Preap i Old Mrs. Jones borrowed Mrs. Brown’s receipe for making watermelon pickle tne other day, and, bemg hard of hearing, as she couldn’t read very well, she got her grandson ’Jakie to read it for ner. Jakie took the paper, like a dutiful child, and, folding it upside down, commenced: “Take a green watermelon —” “Why, Jakie, ain’t you mistaken? I thought the melon must be ripe.”** “Oh, what’s the matter wiayew! Gew ever see a watermelon that wusn’t green ?”

“Cut the watermelon into four halves—” “But there ain’t only two halves to anything. I don’t believe you arc reading that, Jakie.” “Well, I don’t have to, anyhow that’s what the reseet says. Then soak it in a pint cup—” “Oh, dear me! How in the world can you put a watermelon in a pint cups” “Well, i I ain’t here to tell the whereas and howfores. I’m just reading the facts and you can put in the fllosofee to suit your taste. After soakin’ the melon put in a skillet and fry it fur five days.” “I wonder if Mrs. Brown sent me such a recipe as that?” said the old lady: but Jakie kept on: • “Then put the watermelon in a quart bowl and pour over it a gallon of vinegar, taking care not to spill the vinegar—” “I’d just like to know how you can pour a gallon into a quart bowl without spilling any of it;” but Jakie continued . “Then sift a peck .of red pepper through a milk strainer over the melon, and to one cup of butter and the white and yolkes and shells of three eggs, and throw in the old hen that laid them, and four sticks of-cinnamon drops and two tablespoonsful of quinine and run it through a coffee-mill and let it stand till it ferments, and then put it in a tin can and tie tire can to a dog’s tail—this will stir it up to the right consistency—and then you can turn it oft in croeks and have it ready for use. Serve it cold and spread it on mince pie and it makes capital desert,” and Jakie slid out the door and left the old lady looking like a wrinkle on a monument.