Rensselaer Republican, Volume 13, Number 8, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 November 1880 — Thirteen Conundrums. [ARTICLE]

Thirteen Conundrums.

Why te it that there is a late passenger tor every train ? Whj dots a lady always examine the postmark on a letter before she opens it? Why do new acquaintances al ways open conversation by criticising the weather? Why does every man think hte grandmother made the best pies he ever tasted ? Why is it that every farmer oomplains bitterly of his crops when he comes to the city? Why do ladies who sing always complain of ,a cold when invited to entertain a parlor party ? Why has it become a general custom to signify friendship to invite your friend to drink * Why does everybody using the telephone introduce the conversation by bawling "hello.” Why do candidates for office shake hands heartily with every slight acquaintance before the election, and hardly ever recognize them afterwards? Why do all male acquaintances of a gentleman want to try on his new hat, and why do all female acquaintances of a lady pronounce her hat a "perfect flight Y’ When a train comes at the depot, why d-o passengers push and crowd one another to get out as though picnic struck—just as though life depended on reaching the platform without a minute’s delay ? Why do some extremely pious people think it is wicked to read a Bunday paper upon which all the work is done Saturday evening, but are eager for a Monday paper, upon which aH the work te done Sunday? Why does a man when standing before a fire turn his back to it and fold his bands behind him: and why does a lady while standing before the nre turn her face to it and told her hands behind her?