Rensselaer Republican, Volume 12, Number 20, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 30 January 1880 — SENSE AND NONSENSE. [ARTICLE]

SENSE AND NONSENSE.

Working between meals is what wears oat the tramp. * Feelings cannot be aa fudges of right and wrong. It is the boss printer who takes an honest boy and makes a devil of him. The reason why a man steals an umbrella is because he does not like to go out in the rain and borrow one. It is not easy for a man to regulate his income by his expenses, and he must try and gauge his expenses by his Inoome. The New Haven Register says the Connecticut winter is so open that baseball can be played; but it thanks Heaven it is not played. Fresh eggs have a lime-like surface while stale eggs are glossy and smooth of shell; bat none of this appears in the dish known as scrambled eggs. “Never let a cold run,” says a cough medicine advertisement. This is bad advice. Always let a cold run. Let it run so fast that you can’t catch it. Lott a, the actress, was a witness in a St. Louis lawsuit. “ What is your age?” she was asked. “People might not believe me if I told,” she replied, “ for some say I am forty-five.” That was the only answer she would make. The City of Paris has just .opened seven new central schools of design for E'rls only. Education in drawing has tely been made compulsory in France, and the means for acquiring it are therefore being extended in every direction.

A biember of the Providence (E. I.) law firm which has acted as counsel for Mrs. Sprague m her recent litigation 6ays that he has no knowledge whatever of any movement on Mrs. Sprague’s part toward obtaining a divorce from her husband. When General Grant visited Girard College in Philadelphia recently, he asken one of the instructors: “Do you allow the boys to use tobacco?” The instructor responded in the negative. “That’s right,” said the General; “they’re not so apt to take to it after they get out, then.” “ You can get a bottle or barrel of oil off any carpet or woolen stuff by applying dry buckwheat plentifully.” We are going into the oil business immediately. When one can get a barrel of oil at the small outlay of a little buckwheat aud an old piece of carpeting, you may count us in.— EjA.hange. Mrs. Etheridge’s boy walked on stilts in front of Gray’s grocery at Dallas, Tex. This annoyed Gray, and he whipped the boy. Mrs. Etheridge sent her son back, and posted hersclfT pistol in hand, to protect nim in his diversion. Gray got a l>te club and went out for a combat with the woman. He received a bullet wound in his head, and she was carried home dangerously pounded But the boy still walks on his stiltsA young man at Lodi, Tenu., not otherwise particular about his dress, developed a strange concern as to neckties. He bought them by the dozen, spent hour after hour selecting them, and chose the brightest colors. The mania grew upon him, until - at length thero waa no reason to doubt him insanity upon that point. He spent all his time and money in procuring and displaying ties of odd kinds, and was finally sent to an asylum.

W. W. Corcoran, the well-known Washington millionaire, has once recovered from disease after his doctor and friends had given him up. his pallbearers had been selected, and every arrangement had been made for his funeral. He rallied, to the amazement of everybody, and so steadily got better that within two or three months he was going about on foot and attending personally to his aifairs. He is now much stronger than he was before his illness. A woman at Stockton, Cal., who had a drunken husband, was waiting late at night for him to come home. The lamp was in her bedroom and she was in the parlor. Hearing a noise outside, as if a man who was drunk was trying to find the gate, she went out, and sure enough a drunken man was there. She helped him into the parlor, as she had been used to doing, and placed him carefully on the lounge. After a hard stiuggle she got his coat and vest off, and then pulled at the boots (as she thought they were), but they would not come off. At length she felt up about the ankles and found that the man had Bhoes on—something that her husband never wore. Striking a light she saw he was a stranger. A rather curious thing happened in New Haven recently. A large black cat managing to get into the cellar in some mysterious way, and finding it impossible to get out, and feeling rattier despondent at the outlook of affairs, resorted to craft. Jumping on the win-dow-sill, with her front paws she kept the wire connected with the front doorbell working, the bell pealing forth incessantly. The head of the family, becoming alarmed at the steady and incessant ringing, went to the door, found no one, and returned to his armchair to ponder. The ringing continued, and, thinking, perhaps, that a band of robbers were in the house, he started in search of a policeman, who should search the cellar and arrest the offender, if offender it should prove. The policeman and the prominent citizen entered the cellar, armed with clubs and pistols and a dark lantern. The flash from the lantern lit on the ca(, working away in dead earnest. “ Goodness me! why, what is that?” asked the proprietor. “By hoky poky, ’tis the cat,” readily responded the officer. The cat in the meanwhile, seeing a way of escape, ran out the door, and order was once more restored in the house.