Rensselaer Journal, Volume 12, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 29 January 1903 — HUMOR [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

HUMOR

SMITH’S MEMORY. There Wu Only One Thins He Had Forgotten. A large and perspiring man, laden with bundles, bustled on to the Milwaukee boat, upset a small boy in a sailor suit, carried away a half yard of flounce from the skirt of a lady with a purple silk waist and finally brought up, panting and exhausted, beside a small woman sitting tranquilly on the after deck. “Horace!” “There, now, I know just what yon are going to say, Mildred—that same confounded old question. My dear, I forgot nothing!” “But, Horace”— “No;- I did not forget to buy the fruit!” He thrust a basket of peaches into her lap. “Nor the toweling! ” Another package followed. “Nor the 6)4 yards of cambric, Mildred ! ’ ’ Another package. “Nor the spool of silk—hang it I—spool of silk!” “But”— “Nor the rattle, nor”— “But, Horace, dear, will you allow” “No, madam, I will not allow! There is no use in asking. I tell yon, I have forgotten nothing—nothing 1” He began to unload bis pockets. “Here’s the prescription, and here’s the—er—thingambob that your mother wanted, and here’s a book for Amelia, and hereV ’ — “Horace Smith, stop your talking”— His wife rescued the “thingambob” from the deck, smiled brightly up into the triumphant face and said pleasantly : “Yes, dear, but in what store did you leave your hat?” And then the boat started.—Chicago Inter Ocean.