Rensselaer Journal, Volume 12, Number 16, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 September 1902 — Arrow Shots. [ARTICLE]

Arrow Shots.

I shot an arrow into the air, It fell to the earth; I know not where. —Longfellow. We should think it would make a barber tired to sharpen razors for people who want to shave themselves. Old fashioned folks do not like meals served in courses. There are a good many people, after all, who do not drink coffee to preserve their complexions. Lots of men wish they were young again and knew as much as they do now, but we cannot see that it would be much of a start. If heels on girls’ shoes keep on traveling forward they will soon be on the toes. It does not make much difference, but we would just as soon that a preacher did not wear a white vest. ■%z%, When a baby cries at an entertainment folks do not really mean to do so, but they always look at it as if the mother enjoyed it. Remember that anything beats loafing. You can jolly any man by telling him that he drives a good bargain. -%Z%. When a baby is fussy, its mother always blames the little thing’s teeth. No woman dares go visiting nowadays without an assortment of kimonas. Bringing up children according to strict church rules hardly ever- does any good, for they will not follow them. Buttons on the back of a frock coat do no good, yet the coats look real tacky without them. Nevertheless, when a man comes back to his old town you judge him by the clothes he wears. Whenever we see certain men together we always know what is going to happen. ■%z% Everybody knows when he is being “jollied,” yet he enjoys it.

* Anybody who has ever employed a lawyer can give you lots of advice. If a preacher assumes to give a baccalaureate address, it ought, at least, to be grammatical. * An optimist may also be defined as a man who can turn every snub into an evidence of his popularity. If a story teller hints at a story, do not encourage him or you will get it all. We admire a man who knocks for his own family. ■wwYou can judge folks a good deal by the people they will not associate with. How many disagreeable people have you dodged today? It is no use, an old man cannot make himself look young by shaving off his whiskers. If we could draw pay for the advice we could give, we would soon be rich.