Rensselaer Journal, Volume 11, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 February 1902 — CLERICAL ERROR [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

CLERICAL ERROR

By FRAKOIS LYNDE.

fCopyright. 1839.'by the Author.] [CONTINUED.) “Sir,” sai&l, shouting at the top of my voice, “we are about to be consumed. This locomotive is afire!” Thrusting me asid?, he craned his neck out of the window which had lately been mine, sprang back with an oath, which resounded above the din of the machinery, and brought the shuddering monster to a stand. Then he leaped to the ground, yelling frantic orders to the fireman. “Bdcket of water! Quick, you imp of hades! That’s it. More —more yet. Now get your tools and pack this box. Lively! Get a move! Here, give me that hook! Now then! More waste! More oil —more yet!” The conflagration was staid at length, and once more the terrible race was resumed. Five miles farther on, the flaming wheel stopped us again, and when this had occurred a third and a fourth time I began to suspect that the handful of sand was in some manner accountable for it. Yet I dared not for my life so much as suggest this to the °”riated blackamoor, whose wrath mounted nigher ana grew more ungovernable with each fresh hindrance. More than once we came in sight of the train ahead, but as often as we did so the smoking machinery brought us to a stand, evoking new and more dreadful maledictions from the madman, curs- ! ings measured only by the comparative . meagerness of his vocabulary. I Fortunately for my sanity, which 1 was fast lapsing in the struggle for out- ' ward calm, the end came at length, and 1 I stepped down from the hissing monster at the Lavarcck platform, thank--1 ful to my finger tips that I was yet in 1 the land of the living. We arrived but ; a few moments behind the train, /md I caught a glimpse of my young scapegrace in earnest consultation with the agent, Hardwicke, as I passed the cab stand.

I walked into the hotel waiting room, meaning to go to supper with the other passengers, but I was not to escape sc easily. It seems that Hardwicke. whether from malice or misunderstanding I have never been able to learn, made haste to tell the angry father that I was the clergyman who was to marry the runaways. If I had known this at the time, I might have been more charitable. Truly, it must have been little less than maddening to reflect that he had unwittingly furthered the plans of the young fugitives by bringing me to Lavarock. But of this I knew nothing at the time, and when he shouldered through the throng in the waiting room and grasped my arm roughly I was pardonably annoyed. “So you’re the helper on this job, are you?’’ he shouted, and all and sundry gaped to look and listen. “Nice business for a man of your age and a minister of the gospel, marrying runaway children! Worked me by setting up for a Catholic priest, too, didn’t you? By heaven, sir, if I’d known it, I’d have pitched yofr-out of the cab window neck and heels, minister or no minister.” “You are the most unreasonable person I have ever had the misfortune to meet, sir,” said I, looking him fairly in the eyes. “I had no intention of deceiving you”— * ‘lntentions be hanged! ” he blustered. “What the deuce do you suppose I care about your intentions ? I say they shan’t be married without my consent, and, by heaven, sir, I’d like to see ’em do it!” It waa more than was meet, and i gave him his answer hotly and in kind “One moment, sir, if you please”— he was turning away. “I was on the train with these young people, and 1 not only refused to aid them, brut said what I might to turn them from their purpose. But since I have had the very questionable pleasure of meeting you I will say frankly that I shall be glad to assist them if they still desire it.” For an instant I thought he was going to strike me, but if he had any such intention he abandoned it when the crowd parted to admit the two young rebels to the little circle in which we were standing. They were in the last ditch and, knowing this, had the courage of despair, but of the twain I fancied the yoqpg woman was the more ■elf possessed. “I’ll take you at your word, Mr. Penburton, ” said the young man promptly, handing me a folded pa per and ignoring

me angry niacKamoor as nest nemignv. “You wish me to marry you and this young woman?” said I, glancing at the license. “Yes.” “Here and now?” He looked over his shoulder at the throng of curious onlookers as one who would have purchased privacy at a price, but he did not hesitate. “Yes, here and now, if you please We shan't lack witnesses anyway.” “It shall be as you desire, ”1 said gravely, and when I had found my book I began: “Dearly beloved”— The men in the crowd uncovered reverently, and even the man of wrath stepped back and bowed his head. As

the exhortation proceeded, however, he looked up again with a malicious twinkle in his eyes. “ ‘lnto this holy estate these two per-, sons come now to be joined. If any man can show just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter forever hold his peace. ’ ” “My daughter is not of age. I forbid it!” said the father, with unnecessary vehemence. A murmur of protest ran through the crowd, and I rebuked him promptly. “Your objection, sir, is as ill timed as it is ineffectual. You know the law of this particular commonwealth, and you will oblige me by not again interrupting this ceremony.” Then tamo a diversion wholly unexpected and most embarrassing. The young woman bit her lip, buret into tears, and thing heiself suddenly into her father's arms. “Oh, poppa—l c-can’t do it!’ she sobbed. hiding her face on his shoulder. “I —I thought I could, but I can’t. Please take me away—quick!” It was most embarrassing, as I have said, and my young Romeo blushed like a girl and made a hollow pretense of trying to look as if it was a part of the programme. The father grinned triumphantly and addressed himself to me. “You see, it wasn’t so blessed ineffectual after all. I said this ycung jackanapes here shouldn’t marry my daughter without my consent, and I say it yet—l’ve come 120 miles on a wild engine to be in time to say it. Now, then, if you’re entirely satisfied in your own mind that I am master in my household. you may go ahead with your job and finish it —and I’ll give the bride away.” If the cacophonous blast from one of the locomotives outside which punctuated the sentence had been an explosion of dynamite the effect of this declaration could scarcely have been more startling. Two or three cowbovs on the

outskirts of' the throng were moved to aheer lustily, but of. those most nearly concerned the young man was the first to recover his presence of mind. Taking Miss Bostwick’s hand, he looked up at me and said very modestly:' - “I think xnavhe we’re safe ♦« an nn now—that is, if you can make out to find the place again.' ’ I take no shame in saying that I had to fight a sharp battle for equanimity, but. having wqp it. I went on with the ceremony with what shreds and fragments of dignity I could.collect upon the spur of the moment. At the proper question the bride’s father played bis part, apparently without a single thought of bis superficial unfitness, though those who were nearest smiled in spite of themselves, and I could see that my young scapegrace was grinding his teeth to keep down the unseemly desire to laugh outright at hie father-in-law’s personal appearance. When tho ceremony was concluded, the man of machinery took matters in hand with hearty brusquerie. “Now. Hardwicke, you tell Tony to get up a nice little hot supper for four —no. make it six. and go get your wife and join us. You two”—to the young rebels —“can take Dr. Penburton up stairs with you while I wash up. Between you you’ve managed to give me a (qualified) hard afternoon of it, but you didn't get much the best of the old man, after all. Now, then, clear out, and I’ll go rinse a little of this gudgeon grease off. ’' The waiting room was clearing for the departure of the west bound train, and I began to make my excuses. “No. you don’t,” said the blackamoor good naturedly. “If you’re obliged to get to Carbonoro tonight, I’ll send yon over on a special engine, but you’ve got to stay and grace this marriage feast whether or no. You owe me that much for getting you here alive.” I yielded, not altogether reluctantly, it must be confessed, but I declined the special engine. I had had quite enough of that species of journeying to last me a lifetime. On the stairs I overtook the runaways, and Roderick was saying: “Well, all’s well that ends that way, I suppose, but I’ll have to admit I feel a bit aged, don’t you, Ellie? When you threw up your hands and went over to the enemy. I wanted to drop through the floor. Whatever made you go back on me at the last moment that way?” She smiled archly and slipped her arm two inches farther in his. “You’re not particularly acute this evening, are you. Alan, dear?” she said lightly. “You mustn’t forget that I know your father-in-law a great deal better than you do. ’' Roderick stopped short and put his hands on her shoulders. “Look mein the eye and say that again, ” he commanded. “Do 'you mean to tell me—but I don't believe it. If I did. I’d gc into politics tomorrow and make you a Mrs. Embassador—that’s what I’d do. ’ But to this day I believe he ia not quite sure.

“Oh, poppa— l c-can’t do It!"