Rensselaer Journal, Volume 11, Number 33, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 23 January 1902 — Our Man About Town. [ARTICLE]

Our Man About Town.

I Discusses I Sundry and Other Matters.

A woman was in a china store the other day buying pretty plates and things. She saw a chop plate with the picture of a lamb, hand painted, on the platter. She asked the proprietor if it was for “lamb chops.” But to the credit of the town and to the woman it must be stated that she knew better. V We heard of a woman the other day who had a new way of disposing of loafers who sat along on the street rubbernecking at women as they pass. She was asked how she bluffed them. She said, “I look at their feet. As soon as they come in sight I begin to look right down at their feet. It makes them nervous and they walk away.” We are glad to learn that there is something that will make a loafer ashamed of himself. V Last month the head of a family bought a wash stand for his family and it was for a Christmas present. The price mark on the stand was $18.75. He erased the mark and put on it $35. He said they would like it a good deal better and it did not cost much to make the change. • * * • fi When men /come to town to distribute a new kind of yeast or baking powder, every kid in town is busy. One Bet of kids areemployec| to distribute the samples around at the houses and another! set follows up and picks up every package as soOn as it is left at a door. They carry the samples away for their own use. They are not employed by the distributors. *** A woman took her three weeks’ old baby to church. It cried in church, which is not remarkable. If anybody had taken us to churoh when we were three weeks’ old we should have raised the roof, howling. We would like to scream sometimes yet when going to churoh is mentioned- This baby cried till it had to be taken home. The mother explained it by saying that the baby was afraid of the organ as it was used to a piano at home. Nearly everybody is laughing about the idea that a, three weeks’ old baby is so fastidiously brought up. * * • One of our neighbors got her husband a beautiful pair of gloves for Christmas. He was so grateful for them that when she presented them to him on Christmas morning he told her she would better take them back and get the money for them. They have not yet gone back. * »

When we sell our paper we shall take to running a church paper. Everybody in the church works for subscriptions for the church paper. The preachers from the pulpit urge the people to subscribe, and we never heard of a preacher advising anybody to take this paper. We hold that the church papers have the best of the deal. Furthermore nobody ever objects to anything that is printed in the church paper. Not a week goes by that there are not a great many people mad at this papsr, and yet it is the purpose of the paper to hurt nobody’s feelings. • * * Up near Parr there is a very young man, something like four years of age, who acquired a baby brother last Christmas, and owing to the natural excitement of the occasion, didn’t get much else. The family tried to console him by telling him that Santa Claus bad sent the baby for a present. The young man was saying prayers the other night, and when the regulation prayer was done and he had asked blessings for all the family and immediate relatives he scandalized his mother by tacking on the following amendment: “And dear God, will you please tell Santa Claus to cut out the baby brother this year and send me a sled. I’ve got all the baby brothers I can use.” Hear Sam Jones’ lecture, “Get There and Stay There” at Ellis’ opera house, Friday night: