Rensselaer Journal, Volume 11, Number 22, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 November 1901 — Page 1

We do JOB PRINTIN6 of all kinds. Our superior equip- j ment enables us to give the j lowest prices. No Job too small or none too large.

VOL. XI.

0”\ Tr\ O ail nCOC ft gives great satisfaction to know ■J \ i» IYI r» w that Consumption, Bright’s Disease I’hH rarefiil Htini-iallst of over of the Kidneys and many of the the careful specialist or over Heart troublea all of whlch were f > Ystr* Camtnnt Practice, formerly considered incurable, with Croats with remarkable success the new methods, can now be cured. A following specialties - ‘ large percent of Epilepsy and Canrouowingspecialties. cer can be permane ntly relieved Lungs, Heart, Stomach, Nose The best of reference given. and Throat, Nerves, Kidneys and Bladder, Private Diseases, -r. „ n »- Hemorrhoids, Epilepsy, Cancer! ° ver F ®" * g “ . y Old Sores and Ulcers, Ear and Dru B Store. First Stairs all diseases of women. West of P. O. OFFICE HOURS. HOME AT NOWEI.S HOUSE 9t013A, M. 3to SP. M. 7to 8 P. M JgCNDAVS. ~ AI<L CALLB 3to 3P, M. 7to BP.M. Promptly Answered. RENSSELAER. INDIANA. ’Phone 251.

Ellis’ Opera House. TO-Z^XGKECT! A WHIRLWIND OF FUN AND MUSIC. The Brilliant Comedienne MAY SMITH ROBBINS —Supported by the Royal Stock Co. Bright Music. Pretty Girls and Graceful Dancers. If You Want to Enjoy a Good -Laugh go and See "ft ROYAL RECEPTION.” Monday Evg., Nov. lith. I’d leave my happy home and cross the deep blue sea. Rather than be without Charley and my Rocky Mountain Tea. B. P. Fendig. #

HOMINY MEAL ! HAVE YOU TRIED IT? Yon cannot afford to be ignorant of the value of HOMINY MEAL an a feed. It is the heart of the corn cooked and steam dried. Give it a trial, and you will be convinced that it is the best and most economical feed you can get. Any kind of grain accepted in exchange. Call at the Feed Store. - COX & BRANCH. * 1 . ■ "V TO ANYONE WHO A \ BUYS POINTER I LUMBER ~ :.j£§k HARDWARE . —op—- ... 1\( ICP at McCoysj|| “““* burg, I ml. PI tin, r i * Hemlock piece OftMrLtj at * l6 -00 Per M. ■ t Nails, 3c per pound.

The JOURNAL aiid CHICAGO WEEKLY INTER OCEAN for $1.38 per year. JOURNAL andl TOLEDO BLADE, $1.25.

The Rensselaer Journal.

Taking Castor Oil.

We see humor all around us, said Eli Perkins. The other day a loving mother saw that her sweet little boy needed some castor oil. I noticed the mother’s tact. It was humorous. “Georgie,” she said, ‘‘l’ve got some sweet stuff in this little bottle. Smell of it; it’s scented with vanilla, just like ice cream. Don’t you want some?” Georgie had taken medicine before and was suspicious and silent. “Come, my darling, it’s just like honey.” Georgie was still silent. “If you’ll take some, Georgie, darling,*l’ll let von go to the circus.” “How much, mamma?” eying the bottle suspiciously. VOh, only a spoonful, just a spoonful,” she replied, as she uncorked the bottle. “And you’ll give me some sugar besides?” he asked. “Of course I will—a big lump.” He waited until she began pouring from the bottle, and then asked : “And you’ll give me ten cents, too?” “Yes, of course.” , “And you’ll buy me a bicycle?” he went on, seeing his advantage. “O, I guess so.” “No bicycle—no ile,” he said, as he stepped back. “Well, I’ll buy you a bicycle,” she replied, filling the spoon up. , “And a toy pistol?” “I’ll think of it.” “You can’t think no castor oil down me!” he exclaimed, looking around for his hat. “Here—l will, or I’ll tease father to, and I know he will. Come, now swal low it down.” “And you’ll buy me a hatchet?” “Yes.” “And two hundred marbles ?” “Yes. Now take.it right down.” “And a pug dog ?” “I can’t promise that 1” “All right—no dog, no ile !” “Well, I’ll ask your father.” “And you’ll buy me a pony ?” “Oh, I couldn’t do that. Now, be a good boy and swallow it down.” “Oh. yes, I’ll swallow that stuff, I will!’’ he said, as he clapped on his hat “You may fool some other boy witfi a circus ticket and a lump of brown sugar, but it’ll take a hundred dollar pony-to trot that castor ile down my throat!” And he went out to see if his'neigh bora’s cat had been caught in the dead-fall he set for her.

Our Man About Town.

You often hear men saying when they go to explain a proposition to you, “I’ll just tell you for why.” Now what does “I’ll tell you for why” mean ? V An old miser near Remington had a boy whom he let out for another family toraise and all it cost the old miser was a nickel, and that was one time when the son went to visit his father, who, in a fit of generosity, gave.the boy five cents. * ,» it It happened in Fendig’s drug store. Jack had told a joke and in laughing at it one of the boys swallowed his false tooth. When he recovered his breath he said he could not taste any difference between it and a natural tooth. And then they all laughed. * * ■ During one of the recent dances at a hall in Rensselaer one of the lady dancers lost her garter. It came off during a dance and being to modest too claim her property it has not yet found a owner. The manager hung it up in the hall and it is said to be hanging there yet, as nobody claims it. i# t* ■ * Here is a new one. One of our friends was trying to describe the condition of a man who was slightly jagged. He wasn’t half drunk nor altogether beyond help. He said he was just about drunk enough so that “I would have given him about $2 for his start if I had been wanting to go on a spree.” Isn’t that pungent and explicit ? * * • A couple of good old church mem bers had got in the habit of regularly taking a Sunday nap at church during the preaching services. The preacher got tired of it, so one Sunday he asked that the members all keep awake and he would preach a short sermon. Each member thought he meant him or her, so nobody has slept in that church since. * * *

This happened out on—-.veil we will not say what street. A man who had not been married so very long went away from home one day, and when he got back he discovered his wife sitting on the back porch and on another man’s lap. The husband end afterwards that he took his wife into the parlor and gave her a good talking to. It is to be hoped that he did not say anything for which lie might some day be sorry. • * * £- This is a true story. It came down the Union township, Jasper county pike, and it is so true i hat it is sad to hear. A lady near Aix was preparing to do some baking and upon opening the oven, she was c mfronted by the remains of two pet kittens, roasted quite to a finish. They had evidently crept into the oven to sleep and had the door closed upon them. The conscience stricken housekeeper has mourned her pets as completely lost, for evidently, the kittens had died the ninth time before the oven was inspected. It is needless to say that the crematory was thoroughly aired before the baking proceeded. * *

Coming from Chicago the other day, we met a man on the train who was just returning from England, and he was so deucedly English, don’t you know, that he affected all sorts of little oddities. But the only word he had got hold of that suited him real well was “Bloomin.’” Everything he spoke about was “bloomin' ” It was “bloomin’ ” hot, and it was “bloomin’” cold. The “bloomin’ ” door would not stay shut, and the “bloomin’ ” conductor wanted his ticket. He claimed he had been in England completing is education. We told him it deemed to us that he did not stay long enough. Wo laughed heartily at this sally of wit. Of course, we did not say it so he heard, it. It wquld have been a “bloomin’ ” shame to insult him, besides he was a big, husky boy. We made that sarcastic remark a.ter he had got off the train, V _ \

FIVE PERCENT FARM LOANS.

One Per Cent Commission. W. B. Austin, Rensselaer, has a special fund to loan at 5 percent in terest and one per cent commission. No delay.

RENSSELAER, IND.. THURSDAY. NOVEMBER 7, 1901.

» Discusses j Sundry i and j Other b Matters.

,C. F. Relgle Left Without Settling His Accounts. O. F. Relgle, the telegraph operator who Oiled Miss Spauiding’s place during the absence of the latter, has left town, leaving a number to mourn his departure. It is said that he appropriated the receipts of the office for the mouth lie was here, and also sl6 belonging to Miss Spaulding, that he failed to pay the messenger boy, his room rent and some other expenses. Before leaving he stated to the messenger boy that he was going to Honolula, but no credence is given to this statement. His mother has telephoned from M uncle that she will makegood the loss.

The county commissioners are in regular session this week. The following business has been transacted at the time of going to press : Reason M. Dunn, of DeMotte, was granted a liquor license. A quit claim deed was ordered executed to Ellis Walton. Notice was directed to be given for the letting of contracts for iron bridges as follows: Two in Walker township, two in Barkley township, one in Milroy township, two in Newt-on township and one in Jordan. Angeiine Walters et al. Petition for highway. John N. Baber flies remonstrance. Overruled and John M. Wasson, Frank Parker and Webb Jackson appointed reviewers. John Armstrong et al. Petition for ditch. B. J. Gifford, remonstrant, flies written objection to report of reviewers. Overruled, report approved and ditch ordered established. Nancy E. Brown et al. Petition for ditch. Same aotion as above. Jacob D. Rich et al. Petition for ditch. B. J. Gifford flies demurrer to the petition. Overruled. Then flies remonstrance and bond. Approved. Sylvester Gray, J. F. Irwin and William Washburn appointed reviewers. John W. Hutchinson etal. Petition for ditch. Overruled. Isaac N. McCurtain et al. Petition for highway. Ordered established on payment by petitioners of S2O damages to John O. Frazee within 60 days One-half of the costs of the review to be taxed to Mrs. Candace Loughridge. Barbara Kelley et al. Petition for ditch. John O’Connor, David D. Gleason and Brusnahan appointed reviewers. • Elias Arnold et al. Petition for vacation of highway. Warren Robinson, J. O. Porter and F. M. Parker appointed viewers. Amos Alter et al. Petition for ditch. Henry Grow, Felix French and Wm. Daniels appointed viewers. An extension of the contract w*ili the tax ferrets was made to include the years 1898, 1899, 1900 and 1901. On petition of Charles M. Blue, trustee of Marion township, the new gravel road in said township was accepted as a part of the Marion township gravel road system.

The following are the petit jurors drawn, for the November term of the circuit court, which commences next Monday. They are expected to report for duty Thursday, November 14th : Daniel Maguire Jordan brands F. Hopkins Newton John H. Schatzley Whealfield Cornelius Bitrma. ~ Keener John V. Meyers ’!!! .’’.Walker Washington Cook ...... . Hanging Grove Lewis B. Josserand Hanging Giove James W. Kennedy lordan ■a 5 ' 1 ! ’*'® ter Carpenter ■ J • f ree ' Newton John W. Nowels. Newton James Blake Union John O’Connor .Walker Joseph G. Gailey ’. .".’.-.’.Jordan r red Schwanke _ Keener Eli Perkins’ subject for his lecture next Monday evening will be “The Philosophy of Wit-and Humor,” and “Stories Around the Store.” The new M. E. church at Knimatt will be dedicated Sunday, November 17th. Hr. Gobin, of Depauw University, Lafayette, will do the dedicating.

MONEY ON FARM ? AT . 5 PER CF!V\ A special fund to loan on | ,nis foi five years at 6 per cent in crest, with privilege to make partial payments at any interest paying time. Also loans on CITY PROPERTY at low rates. OrU or write to the COMMERCIAL STATE BANK, North Bide Public square, Keusseluer, Ind.

TELEGRAPHER GONE WRONG.

Commissioners’ Court.

The Petit Jury.

A REPUBLICAN DAY.

Off-Year Had No Effect on Tuesday’s Election Tammany Beaten. The elections Tuesday resulted in overwhelming defeat lor Democracy. Tammany was knocked out in Greater New York, and Seth Low was elected mayor by a majority of something like 100,000. Crocker, Tammany’s chief, lias resigned the leadership, and will make his home in England. Ohio, Pennsylvania, Massachusetts, Utah, lowa, Rhode Island, New Jersey and Maryland went Republican by increased majorities. Virginia and Kentucky, as usual, went Democratic.

Home-Made Holiday Gifts.

An article made by one’s own hand is invested with n charm and sentiment that a purchased gift never brings. Five full pages of the December Delinhator are devoted to the illustration and description of holiday gifts that may tie made at home. Every member of the household, and every part of the house, has been considered irj, these remembrances, which will appeal as much on account of their case of construction as thoir beauty and their utility.' Don’t forget where to buy hardware and lumber of Lee, at McCoysburg.

Blow at Saloonkeepers.

The supreme court Friday held whore appeals are taken from the granting of saloon licenses by Commissioners’ Court that the saloonkeeper must not sell liquor while the appeal is pending. The case came up from Hamilton county. The opinion further states that under the present law the reraonstrator must take his appeal within ten days from the time the decision is rendered.

Reliable and Gentle.

“A pill’s a pill,” says the saw. But there are pills and pills. You want, a pill which is certain, thorough and gentle. Mustn’t gripe. De Witt’s Little Early Risers till the bill. Purely vegetable. Do not force but assist the bowels to act Strengthen and invigorate. Small and easy to take. A. F, Long. « It isn’t surprising that Sir Thomas Lipton flnds difficulty in selling the Shamrock. Who wants a boat with a twisted bowsprit—that is to say, with a disjointed nose?

W. ff- %

Mrs. Milton Makeever Dead.

Nancy, wife of Milton Makeever, deceased, died Tuesday morning at her home in Newton township, after an extended sickness, at the age of 78 years. The ftmeral was held at the residence yesterday afternoon at 1:80, Rev. Clarence D. Royse, of Rensselaer, conducting the services. The remains were interered in W.ston cemetery, in Rensselaer.

Marriage Licenses.

Lemuel Chambers and Bertha Williams. Robert Harmon and Ophelia MoOlanahan.

The Designer.

In addition to a most generous and attractive display in black-and-white and colors of fashions and millinery, The December Designer pays full homage to the Christmas season in Its literature and illustrations. It contains two short stories, “Where the Christmas Tree Orows Wild,” by Harriet A. Nash, and “A Traveling Ohrist- ! m « 8 Tree,” by 8. E. Benet; a Christmas comedy, “Hands Up 1“ by Wm. Lincoln Balch; “Charities for Children,’' by Walden Fawcett, and Christmas Carols and their Composers,” by Phebe W. Humphreys. M. Q, Richardson tells those with slender purses how to make “Sixty Presents for Five Dollars,” and “Inexpensive Gifts foi the Children to Make” are described and illustrated by L. O. Lennart. “Homemade Trimmings for the Christmas Tree” and “A Christmas Party” contain suggestions which will be eagerly seized upon, and the elocutionist in search of suitable recitations for Christmas entertainments will find just what is desirable in this number. “Book Notes,” “Points on Dressmaking,” “Health and Beauty” hints, “Tatting” and “Groohetlng” are eaoh given its customary space and attention, and “Etiquette,” “Household Advice,” “Nursery Lore” and “Cookery” are by no means neglected. Finally The Designer offers a contest open to overyone, with cash prizes for the successful ones. Full particulars concerning this scheme are given in the December number. Why not choose a name for your farm and paint it up where passersby can see it. If you are selling dairy products or truck, you will find a name valuable aB a sort of trade mark and you will be Inclined to live up to it by continually trying to impove the quality of the articles you sell.

MURRAY'S New Winter Cloaks /S -ANDWalking Skirts. & Well made and properly finished garments fit; are stylish, wear well and give satisfaction to the wearer. Our CLOAKS. FURS and SKIRTS embody all of these qualities. Every garment tailor made. Prices Lower Than Ever Before.

When you have read this copy ot the JOURNAL, mall It to a friend. As good as a letter.

Announcements.

Foot ball : Rensselaer vs. Chicago Eclectic Medical College, at Riverside Park, Saturday, November 9th. Foot ball at Riverside Park, Rensselaer, Saturday, November 23d, Rensselaer vs. Chicago Tigers. Opera house, Monday evening, November 11th, entertainment by Eli Perkins. D. A. R. rummage sale, in Liberal corner. Begins November 18th. For benefit of Jasper Public Library.

Made Lawyer Cry.

Eli Perkins’ pathetic stories often bring tears to an audience. When he lectured before the Ottawa (Kan.) University, it was court week, and many lawyers dried eyes after this story : “Have you ever been in prison?” asked a badgering lawyer to a modest witness whom he was trying to bully. The witness did not answer. “Come now, speak up, no concealment. Have you ever been in prison, sir?” “Yes, sir, once,” answered the witness, looking modestly down to the floor. “Yes, I thought so. You look like it, Now when? When were you in prison, sir? / “In 1863.” “Where, sir?” The witness hesitated. “Come, own up npw, no dodging,” screamed the lawyer. “Now where were you ever in prison, sir? “In In in ” “Don’t stnmmer, sir ! Out with it 1 Where was it?” “ In Libby Prison, sir.” There was a moment’s painful pause. Then the lawyer, who was an old soldier, put his hand to his forehead as if a pistol shot had struok him, while the tears came to his eyes. Then jumping forward, he clasped his arms around the witness’ neck and exolatmqd : “My God 1 I was there myself!” No. 1. Hemlock at fIS per thousand feet at Lee’s, MoOoysburg. Lomuroho has measured the skulls of the Czar, the Kaiser and the King, and declares that they are those of an idiot, a criminal and a sybarite, respectively. Yes, and Lombroso’s will be that of a martyr if they catch him. When in need of sale bills remember that the Journal oan get you out a good bill on short notice and at a reasonable price. A free notice of the sale will be given in the Journal.

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NUMBER 22.