Rensselaer Journal, Volume 11, Number 3, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 June 1901 — Our Man About Town, [ARTICLE]

Our Man About Town,

f Discusses 1 Sundry \ and j Other I Matterß

A fellow told us the other day that he can’t do any thinking unless he is all alone. Some people cannot think much even then. * • • There is some talk of starting a crusade for the purpose of converting the people who are following fool religions. * * • A man who got married had nothing to go to house keeping on, so he moved in with his wife. But he was determined to be good to his wife, so he bought her a music box, and he plays it and lets her listen every day as she does the work. A man in tins town says his wife always uses the best potatoes in the cellar. No matter how many they have, nor now good they are, she always picks out the best. Ln that way they always have the best potatoes to use that are in the cellar. » • * We saw a man the other day who had on two pairs ofcufi’s. We asked him if it was for the purpose of putting on an extra amount of style. He said it was not, but his arms are so long that it is hard for him to get sleeves long enough; so he wears two pairs of cuffs to make the sleeves reach. * • We heard of a man the other day who, when he first got married, would rather do without a second cup of coffee than to have his wife get up from the table to get it for him. They have been married several years and last week she applied for a divorce on the ground of cruelty. + * * • At a certain depot, patrons of the railroad had pestered the life out of the agent, asking about the time of day. There was a clock in the office but uyo know that doesn’t make any difference when folks want to ask questions. To stop all the bother, the agent put up signs bearing the following inscriptions: “This is a clock,” “It runs,” “Itkeepttime,” “It is correct.” But it diden’t decrease the number of questions by as much as one per cent. » • A It happened down on Weston street the other evening, where there are probably more children to the square* inch than on any other street in the town. A Cullen street housewife was complaining that the children were a nuisance, when the mother of three interesting little tots became indig nant and relieved her mind to the 0. S. H. samething like this: “Where under heavens .do you expect the children to play and what do you expect us to do with them. I would like to know what are you going to do when you go to Heaven and find children there. You and the rest of the old “heifers” will have to be put in a box stall by yourselves where you cannot be annoyed by the children.” While the mother’s language was not very elegant, it no doubt expressed her feelings to a T, and every mother will sympathize with her in her indignation.

A little boy about two years old was playing with a black cat. If he had been older he would have been wiser. But being but a kid he didn’t know any better than to play with a black cat. Iftheoathad been any other color, he would have played with it just the same. And besides, the color of the cat has nothing to do with this story. It gives It no color whatever Suddenly the cat took offense at something the boy did. Oats freqnently take offense at things boys and dcgs do. The cat scratched the little fellow and that was too bad. One could not help feeling sorry for the boy, but it was made leas sad when the women begin throwing things at the oat. The fl ret woman picked up a newspaper and threw It at the cat, but it didn’t care to read newspapers. Oats never do. It may have been a “yellow” sheet, anyway. The other woman threw a handful of grass, but the cat only laughed. It had been to grass. The cat ran across the street and eat down on the curb stone to laugh at the curves the women were throwing.' They would have been the fortune of a baseball pitcher, but as they weren’t in that business, their fancy throwing was all lost. It may be well to add that the little boy suffered no serions damage.