Rensselaer Gazette, Volume 3, Number 5, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 May 1859 — Prenticeism. [ARTICLE]

Prenticeism.

CCy"Mr. J. Smart, ot St. Paul, was recently prosecuted by a young widow for a breach cf promise. He settled the difficulty bv marrying her. He made her Smart lest 3he should him. London Times says that our Secretary of the Treasury “has woven some curious financial webs.” We guess they are very much like other Cobb-webs. editor of the Washington Constitvtion says he is “In the dark.” That’* where blind men always are 0/7"The different factions of the Democracy may well cry peace, for their party : s all in pieces. The Best of Two Bad Choices.—A hard choice was that to which Mr. C. Brockner, of Dixon, 111.,' was put the other day. A freshet had washed away the bank of a stream on which his saw-mill stood, and threatened to carry away the mill so plainly that he set fire to it to save it. The explanation of this strange choice of a mode losing his mill, is that if it had washed away, the loss of a dam and bridge would have followed, whereas the burning got the huge structure out of the way without danger of washing it up against either. OctT’The following Western order war received, by a New York furnishing house, t few days since: “Sangamon Co., Hi., May 3, ’59. «< &, Co — Sirs: Please send us by express, one of them d d things which makes such a noise about a hotel. We have lately opened a hotel her?, and want to make as much noise as anybody. Send bill. “P. S.—A feller here says they call them goings down in Terre Haute.” Big Blunders— 39,ooo Votes Throws Out! —The official canvass of the recent election in Wisconsin was completed last week. The State canvassers threw out 39,255 votes on account of informalities in the returns, some because the county seals were not attached, others because the returns were not made within the time prescribed by law. Fortunately the general result is not affected* the same candidates'still remain successful, but the occtirrance ought to have a wholesome effect in producing more care for the future on the part of those entrusted with making the local returns. Oi/”A French essayest declares that the phenomenon was never vet known,of a man ot genius with a becoming hat. He instances four celebrated French authors who are particularly made ludicrous by the hats they wear—Lamartine,Guizot, Cousin, and Villemain. It is, the writer thinks, a compensatory Providence, which balances the inside richness of brain with the out-ide poverty of beauty—and vice versa. The duller the man’s brain, the more ornamental the hat which covers it. O^7“A traveler says, that if he were asked to describe the first sensations of a camel ride, lie would say:—“Take a music stool, and, having wound it up as high as it would go, put it in a cart without springs, get on top, and drive the cart transversely, across a plowed field, and you will then form some notion of the terror and uncertainly you would experience the first time you mounted a camel. An Indian Execution. —At Tishomingo City, Indian Territory, an Indian named Mantook was convicted of murder. By the custom of his tribe he was entitled to a respite of ten days, but he said that he had to die anyhow, and appointed the next dav noon for the execution to take place. Accordingly, at the designated hour he was led out in front of the court-house, and shot by the Sheriff as by law provided. venerable Rev. Dr. Cox is writing a series of letters in the American Presbyterian, designed to show that the Apocalyptic battle of “Armageddon” is, in all probability, at band, in tb.e grand rupture of the peace of Europe now taking effect. Indeed, you are very handsome,” said a gentleman to his mistress. “Pooh, pooh,” said she, “so you’d say if you didn’t think so*!” “And so you’d think,” he answered, “if I didn’t say so.” ’ 0/7““Mammu, can’t I have my daguerreotype taken?” “No, you can not.” “I think you might send me over to Dr. Hunter, the dentist, and have a tooth pulled; I never go anywhere.” The Country ?\ik. —Those who visit the rural districts now, will realize the truth of these lines from Willis: “There’s perfume upon every wiud. Music in every tree, Dews for tiie moisture-loving flowers. Sweets for the working bee.” 0/7” A gentleman asked a negro boy to •take a pinch of snuff. “No,” replied ths darkey, very respectfully, “me thunk you— Pomps nose is not hungry.” 0/7” “What church do you attend, Mrs. Partington?” “Oh! any paradox church where the Gospel is dispensed with.” 0/7~Life may be merry, as well as useful. Every person 'that has a mouth has always a good opening (or a laugh