Rensselaer Gazette, Volume 2, Number 46, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 9 March 1859 — Couldn’t Find it Ont. [ARTICLE]

Couldn’t Find it Ont.

Mr. Slocum was not educated in a uni- I versity, and his life has been in the by-paths , and out-of-the-way places. His mind is I characterized by the litteralness rather than the comprehensive grasp of great subjects, i Mr. Slocum can, however, master a printed ■ paragraph by a dint of sp Hing the hard ; words in a deliberate manner, and manages ! to gain a few glimpses of men and things from his little rocky farm, through the me- I dium of a newspaper. It is quite edifying I to hear Mr. Slocum reading the village pa- ; per aloud to his wife altera day’s work. ' A few evenings since, farmer Slocum was ‘ reading an account of a dreadful accident which had happened in the factory in the ■ next town, and which the village editor hud described in a grea’ many words. “I declare, wife, that was a dreadful acci- 1 dent over t > the mills,” said Mr. Slocum. ' “What was it about, Mr. Slocum!” “i'll read the ’count, wile, then you’ll , know all about it.” Mr. Slocu r began to read: “Horrible and Fatal Accident.—lt becomes our melancholy and painlul duty to record the particulars of an accident that occurred at the lower mill, in this village, I yesterda,’ afternoon, by which a human being in the prime of life was hurried to that bourne iruiti which, as the immortal Shaks- ; peare says, ‘no traveler returns.’ ” [■‘Du teli!” exclaimed Mrs. Slocum.] ••Air. David-Jones, who has but ew supe- | riors this side of the city, was superintend- i ing one of the large drums, when hj became ' entangled.” [“I winder if ’twas a'brass drum, such as ■ has ‘Eblubust Unum’ printed on’t,” said Mrs. Slocum.] “His arm was drawn around the drum. | ank finally his whole body was drawn over j the.shaft at a fearful rate. When his situ-I ation was discovered, he had revolved with i immense velocity about fifteen minutes, his I head and limbs striking a large beam a dis- | tinct blow at each revolution.” [“Poor critter, how it must have hurt I him!”] . “When machinery was stopped, it was found that Mr. Jones’ arms and legs were macerated to a jelly.” [Weil, didn’t it kill him!” asked Mrs. Slocum, with increasing interest.] “Portions of durmeta, corebrunt and cerebellum, in conlused masses, lay scattered about the floor. In short, the gates of e'.er- ; nity had opened upon him.” , , Here Mr Slocum paused to vyipe his” spectacles, and the wife seized the opportu- I nity to press the question: ••Was the man killed!” “1 don’t know—haven't come to that I place yet; you’ll know when I finish the l piece.” And Mr. blucum continued read- I ing: “It was evident when the shapeless iorm was taken down that it was no longer ten- ' anted by the immortal spirit—that the vital spark was extinct.” “Was the man killed! that’s what I want to[come at,” said Mrs. Slocum. “Du have a little patience, old woman,” | said Mr. Slocum, eyeing his better-half over j his spectacles; “I presume we shall come upon it right away.” And he went on | reading: ■•This fatal casualty has cast a gloom ’ over our village, and we trust that it will prove a warning to all persons who are called upon to regulate the powerful machinery of our mills.” “Now,” said Mrs. Slocum, perceiving the narration was ended, “I should like to know . whether the man was killed or not.” Mr. Slocum looked puzzled. He scratched i his head, scrutinizing the article he had ’ bee"n reading, and took a graceful survey of the paper. “I declare, wife,” said he, “it’s curious, ' but really the paper don't say.”