Plymouth Weekly Democrat, Volume 14, Number 42, Plymouth, Marshall County, 24 June 1869 — Page 1

PLYMOUTH WEEKLY DEMOCRAT.

VOLUME XIV. PLYMOUTH, INDIANA, THURSDAY, JUNE 24, 1801). NUMBER 42.

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HO W I I HAPPENED BY JOHN' A.XK. M Ah ! w love each other well : better far than can tell." Said mr rharm -r- '-bat in .ain Are my't ff-rt 10 explain How it h ippened ! Tell me, now. Dearest, of the why and how ! , Since the i'act we c mnot douht. Tell me how it came afoont." Well, my Urhng, I will try Toexplun the how and why. tSpetaini: for myself not yon; That, of courr-e. 1 can not dot Not your (brilliant mind alone Could haw thai enthralled my own : Not tne ca'm of every ffrare Beamin.' from your -ünuy face ; Not your voice thoneh rauic be Lew melodlon-' to me : Not yonr kt.-! ewe -ter far Than the rtropa of Hybia an- : None of thee. from each apart. Conld have so enchained my heart ; Nay. not e'en 'he wondron- whole Could have flxet my wayward onl : Had not love -votir love -prevailed, All the re.-f h-.d ur ly tailed! There I yon have tli- r tson. dear I I the expiana- ron clear I Sriccieü ültscellnnü. AN 0PTIC.iL DELUSION. "I tell you what "tis, PeD, you've ju?t fallen in luck's w iv that's where it is." I had J-p tit the evening with him; we had sipped. Peaed Crowley, my old school fellow, the iiiLiderheadedest boy ii the school, without a bilHng'sworth ol brains, or sixpence worth of expectations, had, somehow or other, managed to make a pood match year ago, on the str ngth of which he had just taken the Manor-house in our little Tillage of Copeford, ami set tied down in dignified ease ks a country "squirt," with a four-wheeler of his own; whilst I, who used to write half h's exer eises for him, was still working hard for a living, and trodgiag it on foot, I didn't grudge him hh prosperity, but I wauled him at least to admit thai it came through no trTirt of his own, that it was, in fact, nothing but lack. "Luck"'' cried Cwmky, a little contemptuously, I thought, 'luck! do you say ! Look you here, ray good fellow; my luck is j t-t thi : it is oil my eye, that's what mv luck is." "Nonsen.-e,'' I i iortei's. " Do you mean to tell me tlu-t you'e worked for tie money you spend in paying for this nlaa Do you mean to MJ 'hat your gold i- tin fruit of your braius or your hands? That it is good money, wirta from the sweat ol your brow, or that " No, don't," he interrupted, "don't 1 tell yo i it's all my eye " It'' not ail my eye," I c wtinued, " if yon "Hush! I didn't say 'twas all your eye; I said it was all min-'. Look at me." I looked at him. I saw through the wreathing clouds of moke with which he surrounded hinveif, a great, tall, hand some, hulking follow, with close curlv hair, like a Horutn gladiator, and a pir of very handsome eyes, a little constrained perhaps in their expression, partly, as 1 judged from s hool antecedents, because he hadn't much to expreaa, and parth from his being a Utile far sighted. 1 knew he could not see ol y els close to him without peculiar spectacles. " You don'; M anything wrong ab Ol nfe, then ?" he asked, when I had c uiclu ed my scrutiny. No, I didn't. He was toying with a lead-pencil which was in his hand when he asked the question. 44 Nor yet n.''W?" and he deliberately took the lead pencil, and tapped it against his left eye right rn the eyebdl and played a little tattoo urron it, "Nor yet now T he said. 44 Pen, what do you mean:'' I cried, aghast. "Just this: I tell you it's iH mj eye It's only a glass one, bet a capital bit of window-gl is it i--, as rood as most window-glass you'll tind in L udon. too dark to eee throuch, but it. keeps the dfaaght out." And he turned away for a miaute, whisk-d .i eye out, and then, cove: iag up his sightless cavity, brought the eye to mi to examine. If was so thin one could blow it away with a breath, and it looked like a fragile shell of porcelain. " This is my luck," he said, when he had inserted his eye ag.in " It is my eye all my eve and nothing else. If you want to know how. hist light up another Manila, and listen." "But whicii is the artificial eye?" I asked, for I declare I could, not tell as I looked at him. "Left," said Pen, tapping it. affectionately. "'T isn't bad. eh ! There are only three people know it'besdJe yourself, namely, the optician, my father-in-law, and my wile, so I've kept my secret pretty well ; and you need not eo and tell everybody about Copaeford that the new squire has a game eye! 1 wopenny-worth ot gunpowder did it, at school, after you left, so it's no wonder you didn't know. I had loaded a small b TWt can mm which wouldn't fire; and looking down the muzzle t ) see why it wouldn't go off, the charge went in, and1 my eye went out I left schoolblown out of it. as it were ; and having recovered from the acciden'.and had my eye replaced with this very artis ic piece ot china-ware, I went home to Step minster, to study medicine with my la ther. My lather, although called Dr. Croae ley by courtesy, was not a properly (niuli fied doctor f medicine; he was, strictly speaking, a ' n, al niu.n ; ' but folks in our town were never very partirular about what letters a professed surgeon wrote after his nam'-, so long a he could write enough of thtm. JDr. Crossley was Medical Inspector to the Local Board of Health (unkind per sons calie ! him Inspector of Nuisances), and had little or no private practice. It was his idea that I should keep the loss of my eye a profound secret, because he wished gradually to work me into his own position, for which his failing health was rapidly incpicifning him He had some notion the Board might fancy a man could not inspect' enough fov the post with one eye For my part I should have thought a noM the most needful organ for an inspector rtf nuiances; and I have fonnd one eve unite enough to see through a Board and all Iheif wxden ways. After a few years, I began to relieve my father of his duties, until, though he still nomi naliy neiu me p ition ol inspector, me vrhole of the work -was done bv me. As it vaa satisfactorily done, the Board made oo difficulty about transferring UM ap potntment to m on(my fa? her's retirement which only shortly preceoed his death One memher of the Board in particular r.tmplimeuUul me very Ii ghly n my as fiduity in the discharge ot the du Ucf of the office. 'lie is only I

young man, sir,' he said, addressing the ehairman ; 'but he has an eye like a hawk.' He was light. I had an eye. Such was the energy with which I worked to put down nuisances, that the mere mention of my eye was almost sufficient to get them removed. A person whose neighbor kept pigs in his btu-kyard had simply to say to that neighbor : 4 Look out ; he inspector has his eye upon you,' and there was really no need tor my interference. Such was the beautiful respect anJ awe in which ! the townsfolk held my eye. But not one of them knew the singula, meaning which ; ittached to being under my eye, not a 1 soul of them knew he was telling the ; 'ruth by accident. ' Some time before I was appointed in- , spector. a wealthy old gentleman, by the name of Tredgold, a widower, had settled ; in Stepminster. Som said he was a retired Liverpool merchant, others that he , -.vas a retired London broker. People hanUy knew what he was, or where he ; had come from, or what for He was not 1 very communicative on these point ; but it was agreed that be was rich, and it was ; indisputnble that he had a very pretty only daughter, Laura. He therefore beeaaac an object of interest to parents of marriageable young men in Stepminster ; whilst Miss Tredgold lecame a ditto ditto le those young men themselves. The Tredgolda were invited out a good deal. 1 They were not at all proud ; they appeared load of society ; they accepted those invitations; and in turn their hos's became their guests. They were very much lrktd, I really believe for their own sakea, more than on account of Mr. l'rtdgold's wealth. Mr Tredgold was excellent c mpany ; had i een a great deal of the world, could make j himself at home in any society, and, what a- more, could make every one eke feel so loo, if not a little too much so at times, for he was somewhat eccentric. As for j Laaia Tredgold, there could not be two opinions about her: she had the blackest : eyes, the prettiest face, and the best for- i tune of any girl in Stepminster ; more, she was known to be good-tempered, unassuming, and, in a word, nice. " Now, although the Tredeolds had been I settled for four years in our town, and j notwithstanding one after another of the j

best and most well to-do ol our young gentlemen, young professional men, and young tradesmen, had laid continual siege to her heart during that time, Miss Tredgold was still disengaged. She referred all -uutors to her father, who professed to be flattered by their attentions, but told each of them, with never-failing affability 'he had other intentions respecting his daughter's future.' This was his continual reply to all applications 'he had other intenlions respecting his daughter's future;' and he never varied a word, but delivered it with equal good humor and courtesy in every case. " Stepminster was puzzled as to what those intentions could be. It was demonstrable that Miss Tredgold was not en gaged elsewhere. They never received visitors from a distance; and more than fre disappointed suitor ascertained, through his servants, from the Tredgolds' wrraata, that Miss Tredg ld was actually free still. " I became acquainted with the family through my connection with a private musical society for the practice of vocal and instrumental chamber music. The society h-.d been founded very recently by Hr. Tredgold, himself no mer.n amateur n the double-bass. We met at members' housi-s alternately, and managed to spend ome of the pleasantest evenings lean call to mind in this way. My own part in the performances was chit fly confined to singing tenor. Laura Tredgold played the piano or organ with real nervous feeling, besides which she had a very respectable soprano voice. My great interest in the study and practice of music led Mr. Tredgold to invite me to his house rather frequently, to try over some of Mendelslohn'fl trios with Laura and himself, until I became a constant visitor, always wel time to their home and table. " It went on like this for a good bit, and the trios frequently came down to duets between Miss Tredgold and me, wbilt her father would add a double bass obligato to her piano accompaniment At last I grew verv miserable. I began to feel that I loved Laura Tredgold, aud that my position as a miseraole one-eyed inspector f uuis inces was an insuperable barrier to telling her so, and much less her affible Id fatln r. rasping away at his double bass in happy unconsciousness of my ieelings. I tried to stifle these feelings, and to look upon our acquaintance simply in the light f a musical one. I am afraid the very effort I made to hide them must have in some way betrayed them to Laura, for I became impressed with a growing conviction that she knew what I felt, and that ner own inclinations were at least not unfavorable towards me. I noticed, or thought I did, that when I entered the room a faint blush would overspread her cheek that she would look round and single out mine from among the other faces at the meetings ot the musical society and that, having found it, her eyes would stay resttully and sat isfied on mine for a monftnt her dtep, lustrous, dark eyes before turn ing with greater unconcern upon tne rest. And when she parted from me of an evenng, I remember how she would raise those e es to mine with a gentle expres sion that made me dizzy to think about as I would run out of the house and refl ct on my one-eyed ness. Laura had speaking eyes, as folks say. They were not bashful eyes, but mild and gentie ; and when I looked into their der -as, they seemed to flsh back already a favorable answer to what I longed to, yet dared not, ask That the longer I reflected on the social inequality between my position and hers, the more resolved I became at least to try my fate, and hear at wors my rejection, will rj readily understood by the lad who has read his first love-story. It was not an much this it wait my eye. I dared not tell her, lest, it she rtected me, it should get bruited about Htepminster that the Board had a oneeyed inspector. That would be ruin. It was clear to me I must keep this secret locked up in my owe eyelid. But suppose I should be married with my glass eye, and never tell my wife v I should be found rajt! There would be an end to 11 confidence, for I should be a wretched deceiver and would it not be obtaining a wife and fortune under false pretenses f " However, candidly, I only expected rejection of my suit, after the experience of so many more eligible young men than myself. And should I, for this, put my eye in any one's power, and lose my place as inspector' No. 1 would risk keeping the secret, and know my fate first. 1 could easily tell her afterwards. Excuse my not dwelling on the terms in which I Ihid bare the state of my feelings to Laura Tredgold. It is neither here nor there to the story.

M'I have loved you, Mr. C'rossley,' she said with emotion, 'and only vou. I have never loved another. Yet I fear I can never be yours. You do not know, not know she continued, sobbing on my shoulder, ' what brought us to Stepminster. No, you don't know. Yet, if you will ask mv father, first, for his consent to your avl and next to tell you what brought us to otepminster, if his answer to the first is favorable to your desire, and if his an swer to the second is satisfactory to your mind, I will be your wife.' " This seemed queer to me. What did I car? what brought them to Stepminster? Absolutely nothing. "Whilst wc had been talking Laura and I the old gentleman had been up stairs, to rummage out some new trios for our next practice. " 1 Lovely things !' said Mr. Tredgold, patting them affectionately. ' Could I have a little conversation with you, Mr. Tredgold, in private t " 4 O, nonsense ! Not now. I know what you've got to say or I guess. That's all my eye, sir,' he said severely : 1 we are going to practice now. 0, they are lovely things !' and he took an enthusiastic rasp at his double-bass. ' We will talk, if

you like, after supper, when Laura goes to bed. Now, then one, two, three 44 And off we went into chamber music, It was a very constrained affair, after what I knew, and what Laura knew, aiid what we both judged, 1 feel sure, that he seemed to know was coming. For three blessed hours we kept this up ; then supper came1, which I thought never would end. At last, Laura kissed her father, and wishing me good-night, resting her full, dark eyes on mine with a new anil happier meaning in them, retired. 44 4 Well, Mr. Crossley,' the old gentleman began, when he heard Laura's footsteps die away up the stairs ' well, sir, I expect I know what you have to say. I may as well be candid, and tell you I am not taken by surprise. I have had a good many young men here, and I have observed their attentions to my daughter have naturally resulted in a little conversation with me. I have also Wcched you, and had no doubt your attentions would result similarly in a few j words in private with me. .Now, let us have these few words short and to the urpo8e. You are come to tell me you ove my daughter, Laura ?' "This was a most unpromising beginnii g. certainly. It is very annoying to get the ground cut from under your feet with this bewildering candor " 4 1 certainly was about to say, sir, that I love your daughter ; that I love her truly and disinterestedly ; and that in making this confession I have not an eye to' " ' You have not an eye to ?' echoed Mr. Tredgold, emphasizing the ' not ' in a very unpleasant manner. ; 44 ' I mean, sir, I am not in the slightest degree influenced by pecuniary considerations, knowing, though I do, that Miss Tredgold's position is very far above mine from a pecuniary point f view. In tact. a reflection on this very ineepiality has for a long time prevented my declaring the state ot my teehngs to Miss lreügold nerself, notwithstanding I had reason to hope that it would be' reciprocated on her pan.' "4 Well, sir, I can only say I have other intentions respecting my daughter's future 1 44 Mr. Tredgold coughed. The very words. It was all over, I thought 41 4 Than pecuniary ones,' the old gentle- ! man added, after a slight pause. ' They are a very one-eyed sort of consideration, sir, after all.' 44 1 acquiesced ; but I wished he would not allude to partial blindness even in that metaphorical manner. "'But,' Mr. Tredgold continued, 4 having seen a good deal of you for some time past, I am not disposed to think you a man influenced by considerations ot that kind. Have you mentioned your sentiments to Miss Tredgold? Yes? And they an returned? Yes? In that case you may consider the matter settled so far as my consent i-i concerned. I am simply anxious for her happiness. No doubt you wonder at my ready assent in your case to a suit which I have refused a number of gentlemen in much better positions than your own. I have my own reasons. I do not want money for my daughter. I can give her as much as I thin it good for any young pair to have. ' 44 'What a gem of a father in-law !' I thought. " ' The fact is I am a student, sir,' Ire went on, 'a humble one, it is true, of individual character as delineated in the human eye." 44 1 began to feel very particularly un comfortab'e. 44 4 At one time I studied phrenology. What is moral character? says the phrenologist. Moral character, he replies, is bumps. I tried nosology. What is the index of intelligence? asks the nosologist. He knows nothing. They are all wrong together. Where do I look to read the moral and perceptive faculties of the human min i ? whither do I turn to seek for infallible indications that my confidence shall not be misplaced ? To the eye, sir. The eye is the window of the soul. That is where a man's character is written. Depend upon it, it is all in your eye." "Iteallv. this was very disagreeable. I was so perplexed I could not tell what to i do. It dished through my mind that I had better go down on my knees, and at once avow myself a wretched one eyed I japostor, regardless of all consequences to the inspectorship. But ' in- is weakness, I thought. Should I give up the secret of so many years' standing, and loaa Laura and the inspectorship at one fell swoop ? No. With a powerful eflort, I controlled my feelings. " ' I have read your eyes,' said Mr. Tred gold, 'and I must say they impress me with a favorable opinion ot the candor and fraukness of your disposition.' " What a guilty being I telt ! 44 ' A very favorable opinion, sir. And I will say I have confidence in you. Plainly, I like you ; and I would rather have you for a son in-law than any other young gentleman I know ; and I believe you will make Laura a good husband.' 44 For very shame, I could hardly find words suitable to express my acknowledg ments of his goxi opinion ; but 1 blurted out something, and the old gentleman snook me cordially by the hand, and wished me good night. 44 ' I don't know if you will think me unduly inquisitive,' I said, 4 but I should like to ask you one question before I go.' 44 4 Not at all. You probably mean as to the amount of the settlement ' 44 4 No, no,' I interrupted, ooloring. 'I assure you that was furthest from my thoughts. It is on a very different subject Your daughter wished me to ask why you came to Stepminster.' 44 Mr. Tredgold looked at me keenly tor

a moment, then he replied, with some abrnptaens, 'Change of air. Good night' " The manner in which he said ' goodnight ' did not admit of further conversation. " Why had Laura insisted on my asking this question f Surely not to elicit such an unsatisfactory piece of information as this. 1 fancied I heard the old gentleman chuckle to himself as he shut the street door on me. " Could there be any reason worth keeping secret connected with Mr. Tredgold's coming to Stepminster? Had he done anything wrong? Did he want to avoid anything, or anybody? It did not look like it, for he had taken no pains to live a quiet, retiring life in the town. Again, why did Laura wish me to know the reason that had brought, them here9 It mattered nothing to me. that I could see. I loved Laura Tredgold ; that was enough for me. " Then I thought about my eye. Could T tell them, atter deceiving them hitherto? The worst of the first step in deception is, it makes the others so easy. I did not see that I could. Besides, surely it was no crime to have a lass eye ; it was my misfortune. Why abould I go and tell

people : ' Look here ; this is a glass eye,' when they liked it better for believing it to j be real? It would be cruel, heartless. Bes des, Laura did not love me for my eye. j No ; I would not tell her ye:, I determined, I wou'd rather she would find it out. Perhaps I would lead her on gently to the discovery, and so break the blow, and be able to say, ' La ! bless me what ! didn't you kuow it f That would be the pre! erable course. " When I next saw Laura, she was very eager to know if her father had told me anything about the reason which brought them to settle in 8tepmlnster. I mentioned his reply, and it caused her a good deal of apparent uneasiness. '" He ought to have told you that, Pen. I don't think I ought to be your wife till you know.' 44 1 protested my utter indifference to the cause that brought them here, whatever it might be. 44 ' But, Pen,' she said, plucking at her dress 41 Ö dear, you ought to know it. I wish I could tell you. 1 am sure you will regard me with an eye of scorn by and by when you find I nave kept something from you.' The tears were coming up in her beautiful eyes as she looked at me. 44 ' No, I said ; nothing would ever make me change my opinion of her, as the dearest darling Well, wo will leave the epithets. In fact, as I thought of my secret, which I had not disclosed, it was rather a relief to me that she should not tell me why they came to Stepminster. It encouraged and exctued me, as it were, for my own reserve. But I would much have preferred, though, she should have said eyes ot scorn, instead ot an eye. Every body seemed to talk about an eye to me in a way which seemed quite personal. Are you sure, Pen, you will forgive me, whatever you learn about me in the future?' "'Certainly,' I said " Well, in course of time we were mar ried. I still maintained my office as inspector. No one ever had such a wife as mine, the best tempered and most lova ble creature, 1 really believe, in the world Our c ngeniality of feeling wa something wondertul Even down to little matters of the most trivial character in likes and dislikes, there was perfect unanimity betw en us. It may seem a very absurd instance to give of this unanimity, it is so triH'ng. But I have always had a great antipathy to flies. I very nearly exposed my secret on one occasion before the Board, owing to flies. It was autumn and a fly had been buzzing about my face, stinging me for a long time whilst reading a Report. Then I missed him; I thought he was gone. Meantime, that fly was intently engaged in my glass eye It was a wonder the Board never noticed it; if they had, I should have been found out. At home, I have devoted a great deal of my leisure, in the fly-season, to devising traps and poisonous sweetmeats for them, and I have fly-cages in every room. I was almost afraid Laura would think this suspicious ; but no, she never did. Her skin is particularly definite and sensitive. Laura did not like M:t-s , I was glad of that. " There was one thing, I must say, eaused me no little annoyance about Laura. It was only a little thing in itself, and no doubt I ought to have been above feeling hurt at such a trifle. Still, ever so little a thing when it's in your eye, for instance, as a speck of dust, does cause a great deal of annoyance. With the con geniality of feeling between us, I certainly did feel hurt that Laura should keep her desk constantly and consistently locked from me. I wanted some ink one day. I knew she had some in her desk, and asked for the keys. The way she hustled about to open that desk herself, and the excuses she made to prevent my going to it, were a masterpiece of female diplo macy. It was not that I wanted to go to her desk so much as that I didn't like being locked away from it. It preyed on my mind when I considered the mutual confidence that should subsist between man and wife. To be bure, I had not told her about my glass eye that was the only secret I had from Laura but then she didn't know that, and she at least be lieved I had withheld nothing whatsoever from her, so that there was no excuse for her withholding anything from me. Anoiner ining to ao wun ine ucsk was tins ; Laura had received at least two let ters since our marriage, not in female handwriting, which she very an fully cajoled and persuaded me out of warning to see. I knew they were in the desk. And there was a certain neat little parcel' a present,' she said, ' from a fiiend.' That went into the desk, too. But why tins mystery ? A harmless deception on my part was excusable, but I could not bear deception in other people. " By and by, from ihis very little seed, there grew up a auxt of constraint between us, until Laura, observing it, at last threw me her keys, and calling me a 4 bad Penny, (a playful title ot reproach), bade j mo examiue her desk myself, and not be j suspicious about nothing. Then I felt ashamed of myself, and wouldn't do it. , Tlc.n L-nra insisted on turning it out before my eyes, and showing me its con- ; tents. I would not read the letters, but I saw a little box with a brooch in it, which I much doubted being the same she had received in the packet alluded to. It was all verv well her calling me a 4 horrid Bluebeard.' but I knew the handwriting on the paper enclosing it was not the same, for I distinctly remembered that writing. "One day, coming home tired after a fagging morning's work at inspecting, I found my household in great confusion. One of my female domestics was crying, and on my entering the house, she began 4 O, it you pleabc, sir, missus have fell.'

"'Fell? fell?' I asked in amazement. 4 What do you mean, girl ?' 44 4 Fell, sir ; fell down stairs and hurt herself.' 4 Where is she ?' I asked, pushing past her to seek my wife. 44 4 1 hope you'll bear up, sir but missus have gone. Gone, sir left the house,' the servant added, seeing my look of incredulity. 4 1 was up stairs, cleanin' of myself for dinner,' the girl continued, 4 when I heard somethin' fall on the stairs, and I heard missus scream. I went and helped her up, for she had fell and hurt her forehead. She went to her room cryin' very much, aud wouldn't let us do nothin' for her. She put on her things, sir, and went out airuost directly afterwards, sayin' she had

left a note for you, sir. She was sobbin' very much when she left.' 4 Seriously agitated about my wife, I ran up stairs, and found on Laura's dressingtable the following note: 44 4 Dearest Pen, Forgive my leaving you thus. I have suffered much from deceiving you so long, but never thought it would come to this. Do not follow me ; my peace depends upon it. You will soon know all. My father will know of my going. Laura.' " Cool, upon my word. Was this the woman whom I had loved, and cherished, and adored, and kept no secret from ? that i, nothing worth mentioning. to go &.nd own to a systematic course of deception ? And her father a base accomplice too ! he knew of her going. Clasping my hands frantically to my forehead, 40 woman, woman ! look upon the wreck you have made ! ' I exclaimed. The emotion was too powerful, for my glass eve fell out with the force of the blow, and shivered itself to fragments at my feet. On second thoughts, I was glad she could not hxk upon the wreck she had made. 44 Yet, conld I believe Laura false ! Then the demon of jealousy whispered to me about the letters, and the ' present from a friend.' I hardly dared to think about the agitation she had invariably betrayed when I had referred to this subject At least I would go to her father, Mr. Tredgold, go and wring the truth from him, deceitful impostor that he was, and know the worst. " But stay. It was utterly impossible ' to go as I was without my eye. I had been accustomed to keep a spare eye against emergencies in my desk at the inspector's office. I had broken that a month ago, and though I had written for j a new one to be addressed to the office, it had not yet arrived. Delay was agoniz ing; but I could certainly do nothing till I had been to London and got my vision repaired. 44 Holding my handkerchief to my face, I set off immediately to the railway station, telling all the inquiring friends who stopped me, that something had blown in my eye, (this was no fib, for guupowder had, years before !). Arrived there, I eagerly inquired it my wife had been seen to leave. She had, the station-master told me ; she had in fact 1 ft by the previous train, with a ticket for London apparently much distressed in mind dressed in traveling costume, with a thick black veil on. Evidently for the purpose of avoiding recognition as much as possible, I decided. I was therefore on the very road to overtake her, while, as my train was express, I should be in London within an hour of the time at which she could ar rive. 44 On reaching London, after a few unsuccessful inquiries at the Waterloo terminus respecting a lady answering the de scription I gave, I told a cabman to drive me to Mr. Bernotti's, the optician's, in Regent Street. 44 4 Will you walk into a private room, and wait, sir, for a few minutes? Mr. Bernotti is engaged just now.' However, presently, Mr. Bernotti appeared. A pleasant little man, with t winkl it g eyes, a buoyant disposition, and a cork-leg, which always seemed restive, and not properly broken in it never went well with the other leg ; it was too fast for it ; and it appeared to impress the natural leg with a hopeless conviction of inferiority. " After profuse apologies for keeping me waning, and several conciliatory flourishes which his cork -leg seemed to get up independently of him, and entirely on its own account. Mr. Bernotti said . ' This is your size, I see by my books No. 193 Hazel, taking one from a case of several hundreds and a very neat eye it is. Shall I put you up an off eye lor spare use ? Thank you, sir. Am I doing pretty well in eyes ? Thank you, yes ; nothing to complain of. You would hardly have thought it ? No ; probably not few persons would, in tact. You see that the triumph of art is so perfect, one does not really know who has glass eyes and who has not. Scorces of people, in every town, wear them who are never sus pec ted of such a thing, the illusion is so perfect. Yours, I am proud to own, is a very successful case. There are others no less so. Among the list of persons who have obtained respectable damages from various railway companies for the loss ot an eye, and even pensions from government, I could point to at least a few instances in which the eye so damasred has been one of my make. No one has been the wiser. In fact, only the other day, I was deceived myself. A French gentleman was introduced to me by a friend as requiring an eye. This is his eve, sir No. 81 Gray. Well, sir, after caretully matching the artificial eye by the real one. I directed his attention to the extreme lightuess of our manufacture, and begged him to hold it up to the light and observe its transparency. If you will believe me, sir, that gentleman's other eye, which 1 took for real, was glass. He was blind as a bat. I never knew it till he told me ' 44 With renewed apologies, Mr. Bernotti followed his leg, which flourished off, down stairs. Having wished him good afternoon, I set out to prosecute my search after my wife. 44 1 need not detail the particular steps by which I sought to carry out this purpose ; but I may state that I drove to every metropolitan railway station, and made ! moat careful inquiries. Next day, after fruitless search, i determined to return to I the Waterloo terminus, and endeavor to elicit something which might guiue me in ! trusn investigations. l tound waiting lor me there a telegram ! 1 From Mr. Treucold, Stepminster, to Penuel Crossley, Esq , London. Come down. It is all right Laura is here.' 44 1 was so thanatui ! But what could he have meant by having deceived me,' and 4 for long ? ' I thought, referring to her note. And why should she have written me such a note at all, and aroused such cruel suspicions ? There was a good deal to be explained, at any rate. 44 1 returned to Stepminster by next train, and hurried off to Mr. Tredgold' Laura received me at the door in an ecsta-

cyofdePght; and I was about putting twenty diff-rent questions to her at a time, to know the reason of her hingular conduct, when old Mr. Tredgold said, 'Wait a bit. None ofthat. Just cast your eye this wy, Pen, my boy ; here's a little bit of a round I want you and Laura to try over with me before I allow a word to be said about this little mystery. No; I in f-ist,' he said, seeing me about to remon strate. 4 Pleasure first, business afterwardp.' " The cloth was laid for supper, and we sat round the table, a plate in front of each of us, while Mr. Tredgold handed Laura and me the notes of the round, keeping a copy for himself. " When I had glanced at my copy, I felt ready to sink through the floor with mor tirication. I could not believe my eyes eye, I mean. 44 4 Now, then,' cried Mr. Tredgold, smartly. ' Laura begins one, and two, and ' " Laura bagan blushing, and in a voice very unlike her natural one, to sing : Allegretto.

1 Bf feta r 1 Ol do -you know the GUs-eye Man? O! ri?J E f h rTThi - i 'W 1 -v?d

Who ki-t s the shop in -U U" Ki'-gc-nt Street, And poes lit - tie laiue? 44 This was terrible : but n flection was out of the question, for Mr. Tredgold, with his stentorian bass, immediately began singing, to the same air, by way of reply : ' O yes, 1 know the Glass-eye Man ; Bernotti is hi- nam-' : He keepa the shop la Regent Street And goes a little lame. 44 But the worst was, the terrible proof Mr. Tredgold gave that he really did know the Glass eye Man, for! he had n sooner finished the verse than, with a burst of laughter, he took out his own eye to my terrible surprise, a glass one and placed it on the plate before him. I was almost stupefied But in a moment, the old gentleman recovered himself from his chuckles suffl ciently to call out : 4 Chorus if you please !' In which I very lugubriously joined. j Thon there's) one of u knows theOlaM-pyeMaii.TI.- n - AX t H & & - mm 9- 9 9m m 9 9 one of us knows hii uame.Who keej.r, the h. j, ,n v v y Ke - p.-rit Street, And goes a lit - tie lame. " 4 Now,' said my eccentric father-in-law, 4 it's my turn.' And he addressed the inquiry to me to the same tune. "I was forced, very reluctantly, to own, in reply, as he had done, that I certainly did know, the individual referred to. " ' Very well, then,' he remarked, when I had finished, ' out with it, can't you ' 44 Ve-y furtively I obeyed, and placed my eye on the plate before me. My wife gave a scream of laughter, which much disconcerted me. There we were, two of us, Mr. Tredgold and I, holding our handkerchiefs up to our faces, and contemplating the upturned glance of our cy es from our plates. It was most ludicrously horrible. 41 4 Cho rus, if you please.' 44 Whereupon we stated harmoniously that there were 4 two of us' knew the Glass eye Man. 44 1 thought we had done. 44 No, no,' said Mr. Tredgold ; 4 pass the harmony round.' " It therefore devolved upon me to put the question to my wife : ' Did she know,' fec. 44 Before I had finished, the truth flashed across me, sure enough she did. 44 With a little terrified cry, she deposited lier eye on the plate, and ran out of the room, leaving us to sing the chorus by ourselves, to wit : M Then there are three of us know the Glaeg-eye Mm; Bernotti it bit name ; Who keeps the shop in Kegent Street, And guet a little lame." 44 In a few minutes, Laura returned with her 4 off '-eye inserted in place of the one left in the room. 4 You know now why I went to London, Pen. I fell down going up stairs with my spare eye in my hand, and the other one falling out, I broke both unfortunately at once. The two letters you were so suspicious about were from Bernotti, so was the box. You might have known he would not have addressed letters to two persons in one house in the same handwriting, on such a private matter, you dear old goose you. But you need not be jealous again, for we will have oar eyes down together in future won't we, dear?' 41 ' Yes,' said Mr. Tredgold ; 4 we'll all have our eyes down together, now the mischief is out, and perhaps they'll come cheaper, like that. But now Mister Crossley, I'll have a word with you. I'll tell you why we came to Stepminster. Soon after Laura left school, she met with the accident that deprived her of the sight of one eye. When it was replaced with the best imitation we could procure, I began to sec that there would be plenty of suitors yearning to accept her one eye as a drawback that might be balanced by her money, for everybody knew of her mis fortune as well as her fortune. I did not care to have Laura wooed under circumstances so disadvantageous to her real merits, so I removed here, where at 'cast there could be no knowledge of her inf rmity to prejudice her future. 1 had no intention that Laura should marry without her husband's knowing the secret as soon as she was honestly loved for her own pake. If I withheld that secret fron you, it was your own fault. I was disposed to you from the first, from discovering that you had a glass eye ; and I gave you every opportunity to own it, even leading the conversation to the subject You refused. I therefore considered myself jus-

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tified in strictly forbilding Laura to tell you her secret till I gave he emission. Thought I, you will both nn 1 out the truth bv and by; but till you do, not a penny of my money shall you touch, Mister Pen, as a penalty for your deception Now that you understand one aaothar, there is no turther reas m for your not giving up the one-eyed inspectorship t some man who ia better qua üe 1 for the offl :e. The next thing is fr you and Laura to take a c ouple of months' holiday, and travel about the country till you cast your one ejea upon some comfortable little property, where you ctn make up your minds to settle down in quiet and you can send me the bill, and then weH aee what else can be done for you.' 44 Need I say, we did so or that, in consequence, here we are. "There," said Pen, when he had finished his story, " I hope I have convinced vou that my luck is 'all my eye"" Chambers' Journal.

-m A Surprise Party Nurpri.sed. An incident occurred in this city a few days since, too good to be lost. A young lady, whose name was not P.;tiline, came out from the East to visit I, er mar riet! sister, never, of course, entertaining an idea of matrimony. At her sister's house she 4 met by chance" a youns man from the interior of the State, whose name was not Claude. Neither her sister nor any of her admirers imagined the young lady inclined towards matrimony, and were more than ever convinced of the truth of their belief when she announced her intention of returning East, and procured her ticket on the outgoing steamer. Regretting her determination to go, her friends resolve rj to give a surprise party the nio-ht pravkaia to her departure. t 8 o'clock they sembled at a neighbor's house, and, headed by the e'ergyman and his wife, marched in a body to surprise the young lady. Arrived at the house, and admitted, they waited for the young lady who was reported to be up stairs dressing to c.mc down. Getting tired of wait ine, the clergyman was commissioned to accompany the lady of the house up stairs to compel the young lady's attendance. Afier a few minutes' delay, the party came down, the young lady accompanied by the occasional , visitor from the interior Advancing and forming a circle, the clergyman commenced read'ng a ceremony very interesting to all young and some old ladies. The company, as he proceeded, thought the reverend gentleman was assisting in a nice joke, and could not believe it was anything ele until he ended by pronouncing them " man and wife." One who was present, and who was the only one in the secret, describes the ex oressions of wonder, amazement and horror as really amusing- Befand young men who had been quite attentive to the young lady, first laurbed, then looked serious, and finally wished the happy couple much joy, trying the meanwhile smile. The young ladies gVgled a malicious giggle and the old ladle? shook their heads. Even the clergyman's wife looked serious, and before ehe would kiss Hybride wanted to gee the license. That e hibited, the whole surprise party acknowledged themselves surprised. And so the young lady did not go East, but did go North, after spending a few days here, in consideration of her very sensible res dve. it is reported that the agent of the Paeih Mail Steamship Company refunded the price of the young lady's ticket. 8 Francix'o Bulldin. Capturing Monkeys. Monkeys are pretty common, yet as all the families are remarkably cunning has it ever occurred to the reader how thev are taken ? Pitfalls will take a lion, and the famished monarch of the forest will, after a few day's starvation, dart into a cage containing food, and thus be secured. But how are monkeys caught ? The ape family resembles man. Their vices are human. They love liquor, and fall. In Darfour and Sennaar the natives make fermented beer, of which the monkeys are passionately fond. Aware of this, the na lives go to the parts of the forest fre quenled by th monke s, nd set on the ground calabashes full of the enticing liquor. As soon as a monkey sees and tastes it, he utters loud cries of joy, that soon attract his comrades. Then an orgie begins, and io a short time the beasts shOw all degrees of intoxication. Then the negroes appear. The few who come too late to get fuddle i escape. The drinkers are too far gone to distrust them, but apparently take them for larger species of their own genus. The negres tnke some up, and these begin to weep and cover thtm up with maudlin kisses. When a negro takes one by the hand to lead him off the nearest monkey will cling to the one who thus finds a support anil endeavor to go off also. Another will grasp t him, and so on until the negro leads a statger ing line of ten or a dozen tipsy monkeys. When finally brought to the village they are securely caged, and gradually sober down ; but for two or three days a gradually diminishing supply of ttqaoff is civen them, so as to reconcile them by degrees to their state of eiptivity The American liaihciy Iinu has the following: "One enthusiastic rai.w ij man has been heard to say that It is safer to travel by railway than to stay at honn Whether this is true or not, the result ot travel on the railways of Massachusetts for the past year shows a singular immunity from fatal results to passengers. Ttie returns of the several -ailway c rpora tions 'n this State rHadosc this fact, among others, that 24 916,021 passengers were transported by them for greater or less distances dur.ng the year ending Novein ber 30, 1868, and out of this vast numla r not one was killed or injured while ocou pying his seat, although several were ts tally hurt in attempting to get on or oft the trains when in motion, and many persons have been killed or badly hurt while (unlawfully) walking on the track. Kx perience proves that there is no method of travel that is near as sate as that ot the well managed btcain railway." . m mt Thk number of sheep in Ohio in 1808 was 7,089 845, producing not less than :U).000.000 pounds of wool. The firmers of Ohio in 1855 6 lost in killed and in jared 96,251 sheep, by dog-, which w re valued at $283,697 45 The number of dofrs in 1860 was 174,90., making the loss for the two years per dog, t.fi2, a sum sufficient to de'ray the expenses of nearly 300 families, at an annual cost of $1,000 each. A oknti km an one day indiscreetly asked a friend how old she was. She re fleeted "Let me see; I was 18 when I was married, and my husband was M now be is twice 30, that is 60; so, ot course, I am twice 18, that is 36."