Plymouth Tribune, Volume 2, Number 14, Plymouth, Marshall County, 8 January 1903 — Page 7

TOVESI

For every and Come and see

HSTLEY &t HESS Leaders in Good Goods and Low Prices

ftbe fltibune. HENDRICKS & CO., Publishers. Advertisements to appear In TQE TKIBUNE mxM be in before Tuesday noon to Insure tnetr appearance In the Issue of tba week. Plymouth, Ind., January 8, 1903. I a LOCAL NEWS & Mrs. Beerbower is visiting In Fort Wayne. Peter Emenaker has returned to Mishawaka. Mrs. Thornberry Is home from Columbia City. Elmer Glass and family, have moved to Fort Wayne.. Mr. and Mrs. Prosper Ball spent 2sew Year at Valparaiso. Richard Brakel was returned to the asylum at LongcllfT Friday. A. Kline, of South Bend, spent New Year's In Plymouth. Albert Webber will commence buying stock again next week. . Mr. and Mrs. Alpha Ball visited in Chicago Thursday and Friday. John A. McLean, has returned from Sault St, Marie, Michigan. Miss Lydia Blubaugh and her mother are home from Jonesboro. Ind. Leopold M. . Lauer, has been reappointed pnecuting attorney here. Edgar Haag, of South Bend, spent Thursday with relatives in this city. Mr, and Mrs. Philip Wittung have returned to their home at Wren, Ohio. Miss Olive Gunder has returned to Muncie where she is employed in the city schools. George Phillips, aged 20 years, son of Thomas Phillips, of Bourbon, died December 26. William Pontius and wife, of Peoria, 111., spent the holidays with relatives in this countv. Mrs. Julia Medbourn, of Tippecanoe, spent the holidays with relatives in this vicinity. Fifty people whose names have been mentioned In this paper returned to their homes Friday. V- ' . Mrs. Smith, of Kirby, Ohio, spent the holiday with her son, Robert Smith, near this city. Mr. and Mrs. Edgar Seymour have returned to Wanatah after visiting relatives east of Plymouth. Fay Woodward has bought the Eugene Lewis barber shop. Mr. Lewis will work there on Saturdays. Mr. and Mrs. T. B. Todd have returned to Warsaw after spending the holidays with relatives at Argos. Elder Amos Peters, of Cando, N. D., spent a few days in this county between Christmas and New Years. Miss Lavona Aers, of Bourbon, spent the holidays with the family of Henry Price in West township. Miss Myrtle White entertained a number Of her friends at her home on South Walnut street New Year's Eve. Everybody was williDg to ring out the old j ear and they should be ready to help keep out any rings In the new. Thomas A. Edison says among problems of the new year are bacteria fighting and getting electricity direct from coal. - Mr. and Mrs. Parcel spent the holidays with the family of Joseph Anderson, returning to their home at Winamac topay. Mrs. Roath, of Mishawasa, who has been visiting her sister, Mrs. Thomas went j to Warsaw to visit before returning home. . The members of the Alerding club formed a sleighing party New Year's evening and had a fine oyster supper in the country. Mr. and Mrs. Hoffman who have been visiting at Calvin Switzer's retarned to their home at Liberty Center, Ohio Friday. John G. Bowles, has returned from Kalamazoo, Michigan, and will probably spend the remainder of the winter in this county. John Phillips has moved into Henry Ac-crann's house in south-east Plymouth. Mr. Aukermtn is making his ten 2 with the family. v Urs. Chandler has returned to her tzzzz at Loudenville, Ohio, after a tIS cf a week with the lomily of Eli r: : "t west of this city. I!r. and Urs. Ecnjaniin Sinn, of I Idinj county, Ohio, spent the liolic z v.ith relatives here. Hr. Sita 13 c-:;oc: 11:2 Pn- Putlichinj C ; -7.

STOVES!

all kinds of fuel our large stock Emory ness has returned to school at Crawfordsville. Miss Jt-iiuie Parks went to Bourbon to visit over Sunday. Miss Bessie Sanner Is visiting her sister at Tippecanoe. Miss Mabel Jacoby has returned to her school at Bluffton. Mrs. George Lemler is visiting relatives at Columbia City. . j Mr. and Mrs. Schuyler Rhodes went to Argos to visit over Sunday. Rev. A. H. Zilmer has gone to Roll, Ind., to hold a series of meetings. Old Process Oil meal at Forbes' Seed Store. 13t2 Messrs. Leonard and Layton Wahl, of Warsaw, are visiting relatives in this city. . J. F. Knoll, of German township, is preparing to move to Peach Orchard, Arkansas. Miss Theresa Fish has returned to Argos after visiting her brother in Plymouth. Miss Dora Walker has secured employment at Kokomo, and left for that citj today. Mrs. Dr. Rhea, of Culver, is visiting relatives rnd friends at West Mansfield, Ohio. Miss Carrie LInville has returned to her home at Marion, after a visit of a week with Mrs. Glen Cushman. Acme Food for stock, cheaper to feed them Oil meal Forbes' ScedStore. 13t2 Mr. and Mrs. Ed Sills have returned to their home at Payne, Ohio, after spending a week with Henry Hockensmith. County Superintendent Marks is now a full fledged Mason. He took the master Mason's degree Thursday evening. Mesdames La Brash and Lillybridge have returned from a visit of a week with the family of Charles LaBrash at Chicago. Mrs. Gillette and family have returned to Elkhart after a visit of a week with Mrs, Bert Smith, Mrs. Gillett's sister. Rev. W. S. Howard has returned from Port .Huron,. Michigan, and! there will le the usual services at the Episcopal church. The women's club entertained their husbands and other friends at Bucket's hall New Year's evening. There ere about 100 present. The Indianapolis News says with all our prosperity the government sent out the correct time at midnight and the year came in on tick. Mrs. John Sheaks, of Polk township, fell on the ice last Thursday morning and broke her right arm and wrist besides sustaining bad bruises. Mr. Milo F. Hale, teacher in the Bremen schools, has been very sick all through vacation with congestion of the liver and is still seriously ill. Ralph Mattingly has gone to Nashville, Tennessee to work for the Indiana Lumber company in which his father has a controlling interest. When you want to buy Poland China bogs, males or females at a bargain go to John A. McFarlin's at Twin Lake, he has them. 13t4 Oliver Warner, the Argos liveryman was badly hurt in a runawayNew Year's day. His face is badly cut, and braked and his eyes are almost swollen shut, The man or woman who does) about the best he or she can every day need not trouble to write out a series of resolutions as a guide to conduct for the coming year. Mrs. James McDonald, of this city, wlli go to Tyner every Monday afternoon and to Teegarden every Wednesday afternoon to give instruction in music to the schools of those towns. George C. Long, is here from North Dakota, for a visit of a few weeks. His wife, who Is a daughter of William Zehner, has been here since the Zehner wedding anniversary and reunion. . Mr. Marconi says .the public need not be surprised in the future if wireless messages are sent across the Atlantic for 1 cent a word. This will be a great reduction on the present rate ot 35 cents a word. Of co rse we have all made up our minds , to do better during the year just ushered in. It would not eeesn like New Year if we hadn't. Mrs. John W. Thomas went to Lake ton, Ind., Saturday to attend the funeral cf her cousin, the wife cf Dr, Hocney, who died Friday. Mrs. Ilccney V703 the daughter cf Dr. raanco cf Bourbon end had many fi:;zf3 In Uarall county.

Mrs. Caroline Burkett has returned to South Bend after visiting her daughter, Mrs. Elmer Glass, and other relatives and friends here,

Ideas rule the world today, and a new idea leads.the world to progress; hence the man with ideas is the real sovereign and leader of the people. M. J.Stack and family have returned to their home in Garrett after attending the Hoag-Stack wedding and vis iting a few davs with relatives here. Gas, in Sov th Bend has been reduced jto $1.00 per thousand feet and many rooms- will now be warmed without paying tribute to the coal barons. . - Fred Walter, of Columbia City, who has been visiting his sister, Miss Julia Walter, in this city went to Chicago to visit his sister. Mrs. West, before returning home. At a prize fight in Butte, Mont., a few nights ago the women who were present are reported to "have forgotten themselves and shouted," Why how unladylike! Axle grease, the 5 cent kind and as poor as any but no poorer at 4 cents or 3 for 10. As good as any and much better than some at 10c or 3 for 25c. Forbes' Seed Store. J. D. Chaplin, of Bourbon, Is getting a reputation as fine lecturer, Mr, Chaplin possesses a great deal more ability than the average lecturers employed by lecture associations. Elmer Bryan, of Argos and Miss 'Emma LIstenberger, daughter of Adam LIstenberger, were united in marriage at the Christian parsonage in Argos Sunday December 28. They will make their home in Argos. Mr. Clarence Keefeand Miss Edith Babcock, both oi this city, were united in marriage Friday evening.January 3, by Justice Molter. They will reside in South Bend, where Mr. Keefe has secured a position In the Singer factory. Kloepfer's clerks ate tuelr annual New Year's dinner at the beautiful and comfortable home of Mr. and Mrs. Kloepfer on Miner street. It is an occasion always enjoyed by all of them including the proprietor and his estimable wife. The discovery has been made in Toronto that a man who died as a pauper was really worth $100,000; but this doesn't happen so often as the discovery that a man who died apparently worth $100,000 wes really a pau per or worse. Cai Nelswanger and a young man named Wymer got into an altercation at an Inwood "shin dig" New Year's Eve and Wymer was shot through the hand. Nelswanger was brought to Plymouth and placed in jail. He had a he; riag Tuesday. There was a large attendance at the Farmers 'Institute' Friday, notwith standing the very rainy sloppy weather. The discussions were interesting and animated. No section of the United States has more progressive farmers than Northern Indiana. Tne late Judge Talcott, of Valpar aiso, wrote a sermon to be delivered at bis funeral. This discourse contain ed 4,000 words, yet the veteran schol ar, philanthropist and jurist, sought to condense and simplify language by Introducing a new system of phonetic spelling. The year just closed recorded more seismic disturbances and more serious results therefrom than any year of the centuries. In this, respect it was a marked year. The number of lives lost was not so great as in the famine in India, but was greater than ever before from volcanic cause. The Indiana Universitv Glee Club gave an excellent entertainment at the Methodist church New Year's evening to a crowded house. It is one of the best glee clubs that has ever visited this city. The special violinist, whistler, and cartoonist are very fine artists, and the orchestra is hard to beat. Thursday was one of the most pleasant, bright and beautiful New Year days' ever seen in Plymouth. As the sun rose and sent his rays of splendor through the eastern sky came up slow and sure the golden new year. With it comes greater opportunities and greater advantages. Let us enter the new portals of time with greater zeal and greater courage. Mr. and Mrs. Henry Oates arrived from Huntington New Year's eve and all of the children of Mrs. .Sarah Wade except John Wade were here.Mrs. Wiltfong, of Chicago, and Charles Wade and family, of Nebraska, having been here several days. The children residing here are James M. Wade, Mrs. John Welch, Mrs. Jesse Miller and Mrs. Cephas Firestone. Mrs. Wade, who is now four score years of age, makes her home with Mrs. Firestone. The Chicago Chronicle says that an active poison of some kind is sold In the whisky in Chicago is shown by the deaths that are reported among the poor wretches who celebiated Christmas with too much conviviality in the slums. There used to be some truth as well aa a little grim humor in the stories that were told about the fighting whisky thaiwas cold in some v laces, but the stuff which sends ä man to the morgue . in forty-eiht hours must be 'worcc than fighting

Special prices oq oil tanks at Forbes ' Seed Store. There was a New Year's family reunion at the home of Godfrey Shearer. All is daughters,sons-inrlaw and grand children were at home and had a big dinner and a jolly time. The Tribune has been informed by 1 E. A. Ford, general passenger agent of the Pennsylvania lines, that there will be no more Saturday excursions from Plymouth to Chicago. The protest of Plymouth business men is heeded. The advanced woman has found a new field of endeavor at Chicago. Two richly dressed- women held up another on Michigan boulevard the other night, and robbed her. Doing the job as neatly as any man in the profession. The papers and discussions of the State Teachers' association covered a wiue range, but none of them proposed any plan for curtailing the Introduction of farls in the schools or securing more thorough instruction in the commou branches. Mrs. Nicholas Kettle, of Upper Sandusky, O,, passed through here Saturday on her way to Mishawaka to visit her brother, John Hiss. She was a former resident of this county and will visit her brother, Charles Hiss, west of town -and other relatives in this county before returning home. A son of Samuel Crothers, living near Lapaz,was hunting with a couple of companions, Tuesday, when young Crothers was accidentally shot by one of tte other boys. One or more shut struck him in the eye, destroying the sight and causing intense suffering. On Wednesday Dr. C. E. Nusbaum, assisted by Dr. Daugherty, of South Bend, removed the eye ball. Bremen Enquirer. Among your resolutions for the new year, resolve that whenever possible you will patronize home merchants, the home miller, the home printer, and every other deserving home enterprise. Don't allow jealously of competitors to keep from doing what you can to advance the general good. It is pulling together that makes better neighbors, better friends, better people and a better town. Reading of fire destroying valuable records in the Missouri State capitol brings viv'dly to mind that if present

conditions are kept up it is only a 1 matter of time when the same will happen in our city. It Is the general concensus of opinion that a fireproof vault in the city hall and offices for the city clerk and treasurer should be provided and at once. It Is patent to all that the books of the offices above mentioned are in danger constantly and a fire would teach the people that they are very valuable. . Mocnch May Succeed Oechtering. The Mishawaka correspondent of the South Bend Times says; A rumor here connects the name of Rev. Fath er Moench, now stationed at Val paraiso, with the pastorate of St. Joseph's Catholic church at Misha waka, This may be erroneous, how ever, but it is a certainty that the man who comes here to succeed the scholarly priest who was laid at rest Tuesday has already been selected. Father Moench was for a time at Plymouth, and is said to be a very able clergyman. Ball & Company Banquet One of the finest banquets of the season was that given at Hill's Cafe, New Year's Eve, by Ball & Company. Those present were Prosper Ball, manager of the big store, Alpha J. Ball, cashier and their wives; Jerome A. Ba.1, manger of the tailoring department, and the following salespeople; Charles Humphrey and wife, William S. McGlothlin and wife, Mrs, Edith Carpenter, Miss Pearl Winings and her sister, Mrs. Pierce, Miss Grace Hoover, M iss Mollie McNeil and Edwin Myers. From the tailoring department there were present: J. V. Sweck, Adam Ball, Joseph Emanacker and Misses Nancy Dii'son, Mary Sullivan, Sarah Fritzen and Anna Knoll; also Messrs. Claud Bissel), Lawrence Carvey and James Stephens of the reserve help be sides Miss Louie Ball and some other friends. The menu consisted of blue points on half shell, French wafer crackers, salted almonds, olives, baked fish and cream dressing, potatoes, dill, pickles, fancy rolls, roast young turkey and sage dressing, French peas, cream potatoes ana brown sweet potatoes, celery, crisp lettuce salad, cranberry sauce, hot but tered Vienna rolls, pineapple ice, Neapolitan, -ice cream, chocolate cake, fruit cake, coffee fruit, wine and cigars. The service and the arrangement of the table and decorations were in the latest style. Prosper A. Ba!l, as toast master, opened the after dinner speeches with appropriate remarks which were f of lowed by felicitious remarks from most of those present. It was an occasion that will always be a bright spot, in the memory of those present and all the employes of the great store begin the new year with the hope that it will be one of (the brightest and best of their lives.

MARRIED Vansjildcr-Sporuler. . The marriage of Grace Sponsler and Harry Vangilder was solemnized Thursday afternoon, Jan. 1. at t o'clock at the home of the bride's parents. Rev: A. P. DcLortg of theMethodist courch, officiating.

The bride is the only daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Theo. Sponsler aad is a well known young lady. The groom is the eighth son of Mr. and Mrs. J. V. Vangilder and is a well known young man of very good qualities. A bounteous supper was spread to the enjoyment of about sixty guests. The guests from out of town were: Mr. George Weyrick, Miss Viola Weyrick and Mr, Fred Searls of Elkheart, Mr. M. Weyrick and son, Earl, Mr. and Mrs. Erwin Weyrick, of South Bend, Mrs. M. G. Hill, of Marquette, Mich., and Mr. and Mrs. Charles Stansbury, of Talma. To Unite Four Indiana Towns. Mayor Armanis F. Knotts, of Ham mond, was in Indianapolis this week on legal business, and told of a plan to combine the towns and cities of Hammond, Whiting, East Chicago and Indiana Harbor into one city, un der a special , charter to be asked of the legislature at the coming session. Mayor Knotts says the property owners of all four places want the change. Rev. J. E. Hartman Surprised. About fifty of the members and friends of the Reformed church gathered at the parsonage immediately after prayer meeting New Year's evening and succeeded in completely surprising Rev. and Mrs. J. E. Hartman. After the guests were all assembled and Mr. and Mrs. nartman had recovered somewhat from their surprise, N, V. Hoover, Mn a neat little speech, presented Rev. Hartman with a purse of $10.50. J. A. Yockey then stepped torward and presented Mrs. nartman with a purse of the same amount. The evening was most pleasantly spent In asocial way, interspersed with music. About 11 o'clock oysters were served, after which the guests departed, wishing Rev. and Mrs. nartman many happy returns for the coming year. The Xose. Nothing is more rare than a really perfect nose that is, one which unites harmony of form, correctness of proportion and proper affinity with the other features. The following are, according to the rules of art the conditions requisite to the beauty of this organ: The nose should have the same length as the forehead and have a slight depression at its root From its root to its extremity it should follow a perfectly straight line and come exactly over the center of the upper lip. The bridge of the nose, parallel on .both sides, should be a little wider in the center. The tip should be neither too thin nor too flesby, and its lower outline neither narrow nor too wide. The lobes must be gracefully, defined by a slight depression. Seen . sideways, the lower part of the nose will have but a third of Its total length. Hla One Regret. A fare was being rattled through a Dublin suburb on a rickety Jaunting car drawn by a no less rickety horse. Having proceeded some distance, the horse, owing to apparent old age and sheer exhaustion, fell, never to rise again. The fare was very profuse in bis sympathies toward the driver, who, however, appeared to take the "Whole thing rery coolly and explained: "It's just like this with me, your honor. I don't regret the old brute a bit He was bad from the start. But somehow or other, I can't help thinking of the beautiful feed of oats I gave him this morning." The Pott er of a Tip. Experienced Traveler (at railway restaurant When did that man at the other table give his order? Walter Bout ten minutes ago, sir. "What did he order?" "Beef steak and potatoes, sir. "How much did he tip youY' "Sixpence, sir." "Well, here's a shilling. Cook him another steak and bring me his." "Yes, sir." London Telegraph. Too Much Like Work. "It's terrible to be sleepy so much of the time," said Meandering Mike. "Why don't you go to sleep?" rejoined Plodding Pete. "You might as welL" "Dat's where you're wrong. If dere Is anyt'Ing I dreads. It's goin' to sleep. I might dream I was workin." -Washington Star. Irene Opportunity. Willie What makes you come to our house so often, Mr. Hankinson? Do you want to marry our Irene? Miss Irene (taken by surprise, but realizing with rare presence of mind that Mr. Hankinson has to say something now) Willie, you Impertinent boy, leave the mom!

Usually the opportunities that come to a mai? are those that knock on his door on 1 cold morning and he has to go out la his ban feet and coax in. Atchison Globe. FOR DESSERT, ON SUNDAY, JANUARY Iltb- 1903, " - try JELL-O, prepared according to the following recipe: . DAN AUA CREAM. Peel five large bananas, rub Bmoottr with fir tablespoonfuls of suf ar; add one cup swtet cream beaten to a stiff froth, then one package of lemon JeU-O disiolved In one and a half cups boiling w ter. Pour In molds and cups, and when cold, garnish -with candied cherries and serve with tain cream. A nice dessert for any meal, at any time. Four flavors Lemon, Orange, R-spbcrry Lzd Strawberry. At grocers, 10 eeat3. cii a pac::ac2 today.

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The

GpestestEvffiPs

The Last Call in the Cloak Department Before Invoicing.

We have ehht Plush Capes 30 inches long, 110 sweep. They were cheap at $5.00; will close them at $2.49. 25 Ladies' Jackets, all sizes, 32 to 40, Oxford grey and Castor; have been sold from $5 to $7; our price now, $3.50. 21 Jackets for ladies or missesvery best in stock; sizes 32, 34, 36 and 38 castor, tan and Oxford. Have been sold from $8.50 to $11.50. Our price to close, $5.50. Children's Coats, choice of our very best, $5.00. A great line at $1.98 and $2.98; sizes 4, 6, 8, 10, 12. 8 Monte Carlo Coats atone-half of former price. Cloth Capes at a great reduction. 22 Children's short Jackets, worth $1.50; our price, 89c each. 5 Coats, left over from 1901.. at $1.98; used to sell at $5.00. If these prices interest anyone, let them come before Jan. 15th, as we have an offer to dispose of all to our firm after that time. The greatest snap ever offered by anyone.

IUoepf ef 's Jleui York Store

v. Slnrnlar Marrlacre Custom. When two Negritos, a people of the Philippine Islands, are united, the whole tribe is assembled, and the affianced pair climb two trees growing near to each other. The elders then bend the branches until the heads of the couple meet. When the heads have thus come Into contact, the marriage Is legally accomplished, and great rejoicings take place, a fantastic dance completing theceremony. The Honorable Members. "I suppose the arrival of new congressmen from time to time has a tendency to give variety to life In the Capital City? "Not a great, deal." answered the man who Is more or less cynical. "It merely means the introduction of new names Into the 6ame old anecdotes." Washington Star. In 111. Hind. "Braggy says his grandfather lost his mind because of the loss of bis fortune." "He's Just got the story twisted. He lost his fortune because of the loss of his mind. That's where he had his fortune. Catholic Standard and Times. Impossible. Biggs They say Mrs. Gabbleton Is guilty of an attempt at blackmail Dlggs I don't believe It Biggs Why not? Dlggs No woman on earth would think of accepting "hush moneysChicago News. Belle of General Sheridan. New York, Jan. 2. Miss Kate Griswold, an aged woman of Islip, L. I., found while rummaging through her bureau a gold pen which had been the property of General Phil Sheridan. She gent the pen io President Roosevelt for a Christmas gift President Roosevelt acknowledged the gift and says he will use the pen in his executive work In the futare. Oos Gardner Foot Work. New Britain, Conn., Jan. 2. After repeatedly warning Gus Gardiner, of Philadelphia, Referee John Willis gave Joe Gans, of aBltlmore, the decision in the eleventh round of a bout scheduled for twenty rounds before the Na tional Athletic club, because Gardiner's J game was pretty much all foot work Hut is getting away. Cudk ' Gift to New Orleans. New urleans-, Jan. 2. Andrew Carnegie has given New Orleans $250,000 for a New Year's gift The money is to be devoted to a main library building and three branches. A Mystic Volume. A rood story is told of the Russian police, who are very careful lest any literature of an atheistic character shall fall into the hands of the peas ants. A peasant in the province of Minsk went to a publisher's shop and asked for a Bible. Unwittingly the shopman gave him an algebra primer. On opening the book when he reach ed home, the peasant was surprised to find it full of mystic signs and hiero glyphics. The peasant 6howed It to a policeman, Vho felt convinced that the Blens were of an "extremely f relink ing character," and eo arrested the owner. At the trial the peasant was dis charged.' and the policeman, liitc d cf being rewarded for bis rclij-a ci-l, was reprimanded.

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The Doar. Man Is the best friend of the dog. Horses come next, but between the dog and all other farm animals, from the house cat to the cow and the beef steer, "there seems to be a natural enmity. Dogs, however, are fond of 6heep and goats but as diet, not as living friends. Cows and sheep an goats should be kept as free from association with dogs as is possible, with the exception of the trained shepherd dog. A dog walking through a cowpen will often cause a decrease In milk flow that amounts to more than the cash value of the dog. Many dogs are worth considerably less than $0.00. Farm and Ranch. Uta Question. Sister You've seen Mrs. Newpop's baby, haven't you? Brother Yes, but I'm afraid Mrs. Newpop must think I don't take any interest in babies. Sister Of course, if you don't ask questions about It sheBrother But I did ask a question; asked if it could sit up on its hind legs and beg yet and she wouldn't answer. Philadelphia Fress. Good Substitute. "Father, I should like to try one of these systems of physical exercise that are advertised in the papers. They are cheap, and you don't need any apparatus. "I'll furnish you with one, my son, that I tried with great success when I was a young man, and I'll warrant It to be as good as any in the market "Comd I take it here nt home?" "Yes; that Is one of Its chief merits.M "Any apparatus necessary?" "Yes, but it's quite simple. I'll furnish it" "Can I take It la my room?" "No; you take it out at the woodpile. You will find the apparatus there, all ready for you, my son." Chicago Tribune. W. S. Gilbert' Career. It Is said that W. S. Gilbert was meant for the bar, and his father was reluctant to see him turning in other directions. "If you would only stick to It' said the elder Gilbert, "you might become lord chancellor." "So I might" answered the author of the "Pinafore" to.be, "and if I stick to the theaters I may become Sheridan. One's as likely as the other, and of the two I prefer Sheridan." That was a preference lucky for the lovers of the stage. Took Nothlna;. Mrs. Green (whp thinks of hiring) But is the girl honest? Can ßhe be trusted? Mrs. Brown (the girl's former mistress) You need not be in the least alarmed. She Is perfectly honest All the time she was with me I never knew her to take a thing not even my advice as to how things should be done. Deep Sea Feelings. Tomdix Did you ever cross the ooean? Hojax Yes; once. Tomdix What were your feelings? Hojax Oh, same as usual. I wanted the earth. Kansas City Independent Many a man's haste to get-ahead in the world results only In his getting a headstone before it la due. Chicago News. . . -