People's Pilot, Volume 5, Number 34, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 27 February 1896 — Duck Shooting at Dinner. [ARTICLE]

Duck Shooting at Dinner.

Hoke Smith has “slopped over” again. It is a pity to see a manly fellow like him stoop to the childish toadyism which characterized his recent dinner to Mr. Cleveland. In order to flatter the presi dent, Hoke had a little pond of waterin the center of the dining tjable. This pond was ten feet long, five broad, and several inches deep. It was filled with water, and in the water Hoke put a number of fish of the kind which Cleveland likes best to catch. On the surface of the pond floated several paper ducks. At the president’s plate a toy gun and some toy fishing tackle, (including, we hope, the_bottle shaped apparatus,) were placed. Around the dinner-table-pond the dinner was put, of course, and the guests solemnly waded through the bill of fare from soups to meats, frem meats to whatever comes next, until by orthodox gradation the presidential belly had arrived at the end of the feas^. Then for the fun. The pond and its share of the entertainment was judiciously saved for the last. And what was the fun? The president of the United States unbent his Jovian dignity and, taking up the toy gun, shot at the imitation ducks. This was very, very amusing. Hoke laughed immoderately. Ditto the other members of the cabinet. Toadyism was wild with delight. When at last they had all filled themselves with pleasure at the duck shooting, the president of the United States, and commander in chief of the army and navy, took up the fishing tackle and fished for the little minnows which Hoke had put in the pond. Again the erjoyment of the president, and The assembled toadies, was intense. Hoke could hardly contain his feelings. The strain on his buttons was distressing. His rapture was almost painful. So was that of every toady present. It was great fun. Never was there a three-foot shaver who got half the fun fishing for whales in his mother’s wash-tub as the president of the United States got out of that pond on Hoke Smith’s dinner table. The banquet being ended, a glowing account of it was duly forwarded to the newspapers, and Mr. Cleveland’s mind gradually settled itself again upon the subject of Bonds, Bonds, Bonds.—People’s Party Paper.