People's Pilot, Volume 2, Number 48, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 May 1893 — REFUSED PASSES. [ARTICLE]

REFUSED PASSES.

Papers That Have Maligned the ExposU tion Unknowingly Reject Courtesies. The papers that “have been for ths last two years maligning Chicago and the world’s fair have learned that for once they have been checkmated. The papers that exhibited the most malignant spirit have been the ones to make the first demands upon Maj. Handy for passes. Their requests would probably have been granted had common civility been displayed; as it is they mJy be compelled to spend their money at the exposition gates. Maj. Handy’s department has for many months been sending all over the country a mass of descriptive matter concerning the fair.' This matter has invariably been refused by the papers that the fair, and the envelopes have been returned unopened. When the notifications concerning passes were sent out, Maj. Handy directed that they be inclosed in the same sort of envelopes used for the tissue. The ruse worked weU, and as a result probably a dozen papers hav* cut themselves off from passes. The world’s fair will indulge in an electric star at night. Calculationsand experiments have shown that the bright particular electric star will throw its rays to a distance of 100 miles, many times the extent of power possessed by any other light, ancient or modern. Throwing its enormous concentration of 200,000,000-candle-power light from a height of 250 feeton the roof of the Manufactures building, the big lamp will shed a dazzling path of light in all directions. Two giddy young men were strolling through Midway Plaisance the other day, when they saw a Turk a short distance ahead of them. “Do you see the Turk?” said one of them. “I am going to have some fun with him.” So presently he said to the Turk: “Well, old Fezzy, how’s your liver?” And the Turk replied, in perfectly good English: “Mjich better than your sir."

“What is all that uproar about in there?” inquired a stranger, trying to force his way through the crowd in front of the building. “It’s a plumber and a paperhanger,” replied a man standing on the windowsill. “They’ve done some work for each other and they’re trying to settle.”—lndianapolis Journal. “A little change of heir,” remarked the old man as he altered his will, cutting off his nephew in favor of his typewriter.— Philadelphia Record. Many a man when he gets home from the club finds himself a number one fellow according to the clock. It does seem a little odd that a good, “trusty" grocer rarely succeeds.—Cleveland Plain Dealer. The reason a person sees stars when he is struck in the bead must be because it makes him sore aloft. —Rochester Democrat. It is usually when a man gets well loaded th At he shoots off his mouth the most. —Buffalo Courier. Some housekeepers are so exasperatingly industrious that they give the dust no time to settle.—Truth. Who was the first wheelman] Father Time. From the beginning he has gone on by cycles. “How is real estate out your way?” “O,” said the moist and weary man, “its name Is mud at present.’’—Washington Star. It does not savor of bad taste to see potatoes appear at dinner in their smoking jackets. When was the last , time that Goliath slept in a cradle? When David rocked him to sleep. Why is a large man just tumbled into a brook like a small pig? He’s got a little souse. Jaoson says ft is astonishing bow bad most good fellows are.—Elmira Gazette.