The Vernon Times, Volume 8, Number 12, Vernon, Jennings County, 4 September 1919 — Page 3

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Cpirit Willing, Flesh Weak. Getting Him Placed. "I1,nv nhmit that Insomnia cure If '"That raincoat molted away In the gave you?" . first rorin." "I imivt nr."!f;!zo, M man. The : "The man who sold it to you was fart R I've been too sleepy nights to , no weather prophet." try it." Boston -Transeript. j He v;h a weather profiteer.'

Bvrn si phi to of hash look sool ! "Weight for weight, a manila rope is when you sire hungry. , just about as strong r.3 a stool 'one.

K-n the woman who Is color blind A man may not be a coward because knows wlu-n she is feeling blue. li is afraid of :i woman.

C ASTORIA is a harmless substitute for Castor Oil, Paregoric, Drops and Soothing Syip3. It 13 pleasant. It contains neither Opium, Morphine nor other Narcotic Eubstance. Its age is its guarantee. For more than thirty years it has been in constant use for the relief of Constipation, Flatulency, Yrind Colic and Diarrhoea; allaying Feverishnesa arising therefrom, and 'by regulating the Stomach and Bowels, aids the assimilation of Food; giving healthy and natural sleep. The Children's PanaceaThe Mother's Friend. The Kind You Have Always Bought, and which lima been in use for over 30 years, ha3 borne the signature of Chas. II. Fletcher, and has been mads under h'i3 personal supervision since its infancy. Allow no one to deceive you in this. All Counterfeits, Imitations and Just-as-Good" are but Experiments that

trine with and endanger the health of Infants ana

Children Experience agam3t Experiment. SI . fZJ

uenumo tastorla always Dears the signature or

Rich Manchurian Coal Mines. The c-t;il mir.es opened last year at Holikangizau, Manchuria, in which l.'CM) iiicn are employed, 'ire producing a good ipirility of coal. The length of ths' beds is said to be about sixtyseven miles. It is propose! to build a light milway from the mines to the Knegari ri-r. a distance of about for! -sev n miles.

Flics Anglo-American Flag. Many people in Manciiester, England, were puzzled recently by a Hag 'en Hying over the College of Technology in that city. The Hag combined the British reil ensign with the Ameriean Stars and Stripes in exactly equal proportions. It was the view of the designer that the new tlag might represent the English-speaking world.

It i- just: ."" years since the first woman v. a-, admitted to the practice of law in the United States.

"o man's life is one grand, sweet sng if be is married to a woman who only thinks she can sing.

KIDNEYS WEAKENING?

BETTER LOOK OUT

Kidney and bladder troubles don't disappear of themselves. They grow u; a you, .slowly but steadily, undermining your health with deadly certainty, until you fall a victim to incurable disease. Stop your troubles while t't re in tine. Don't wait until little pains become big actios. Ijnn't trifl-j with disease. To itvoid future fm therms begin treatment with GOLD 31 M DAB Haarlem Oil Capsules now. Take three or fear every day until you fee! that you i:re entirely fr-..: iron pa. la. Tlas v ll-Iaiowa preparation lins h'"on me ef tb national remedies of Holland for tviituries. In lO'.hi the govern

ment of the Netherlands granted a special charter authorizing its pale. The good housewife of Holland would almost as soon be without food as without her "ileal Hatch Drops," as she quaintly calls GOLD MEDAL. Haarlem Oil Capsules. Their use restores strength and is responsible in a great inearure for the sturdy, robust health of the Hollanders. Do not delay. Go to your druggist r.r.d insist on his supplying you with a box of GOLD MLDAii Hacrlem Oil Capsules. Take them as directed, and if you are not satisfied with results your di-uggist will gladly refund your meuey. Look for the name GOLD MEDAL on the box and accept lio other. Ia sealed hexes, three sizes.

GOOD CH OTHER WAS PEEVED

Prcbrbiy Parson Wculd Have Don Getter to Let Peppery Old Gentleman Finish Nap. m

"And. hilis" l'.agstrv Will!, "'!( up dar,

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idenuily said good old Parson in the midst of a recent sermme beseeeh yo Ho! Wake Erudder Sizzle!"

"Who me?" a trifle indignantly returned 'the member addressed, starting front his nap. "I hit's a pint' howdydo; howiin' at a pusson dat-uh-way and 'stm-biH his medications. I wasn't asleep, sah !" "Den s:;h if yo wasn't asleep yo' knows wlmt I's been uh-sayln'?" "Cou'se. I does: Yo' said, 'Ho! Wake up dar, Erudder Sizzle!'" "Vas;.h: init what did I say bofo' datV Yo' doesn't know, sah!" "Uh-weil, as to dat. yo' doesn't

know mi so f. half do time what yo i

are s;ayin And, leastways, 'twouldn't 'mount to much, nohow, if yo' was to know it. Dem's muh sedimuuts, sah bawlin' mo out sich-uh-way befo de whole dog-guwn coug'egation. Kansas City St;r. " '

Walking for Pleasure. The old-fashioned person who used to walk mile after mile on pleasant Sunday afternoons through the countryside, has practically disappeared. This is the inevitable conclusion drawn by anyone who still pursues this ancient pastime and who has spent Sunday after Sunday drilling by foot over macadam and dirt roads frequented by automobilists and an occasional farm hand traveling to a neighbe's. Walking for the sake of the walk has nearly passed out, along with the oncdiorse rig, the glass-incased artificial flowers in the parlor and hair-covered furniture. It had its day before the bicycle and the automobile and with the advent of these quicker, easier means of transportation it dropped from the human scheme of things with a dull thud. Omaha News.

Chile Seeks Information. Chile-, ha- created a Commission to Mudjr the possibility of constructing a longh'miinal artery for the tiunsmisMiur of' oh etrie power obtained from

French Farmer Had 36 Children. A French farmer had 3d children 22 sons and 11 daughters all of whom were living when the war broke out. The father and one daughter were shot by Germans because they went to Lille to attend a party in honor of a relative's one-hundredth birthday; a second daughter was killed by a German shell at Dunkirk; throe sons were discharged from the army with grave in-

watv.vi.alis through territory.

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The size of the family does not its terrible sacrifice any less

tracie. Youth'

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M R. AND MRS. SKUNK.

"Of course." said Mrs. Skunk, "it does seem a pity we have such a bad reputation." "What is a reputation?" asked Mr. Skunk. "Oh, it's what folks think of us; what our characters are supposed to be." "And we have a bad one?" asked Mr. Skunk. "Yes," said Mrs. Skunk, "we have." "What do they say about us?" asked Mr. Skunk. "They dislike us because of the dreadful odor we have." "Eut do they add that it Is our protection, and that we're very gentle and nice otherwise?" "Some of them add that," said Mrs. Skunk, "but not all." "That seems unfair," said Mr. Skunk. "We can't expect everything in life to Ise fair, 1 suppose," said Mrs. Skunk. "No, I suppose we can't," agreed Mr. Skunk. "Eut do they ever speak of our fur and haw bea"tiful we are?" be added after a few moments. "Yes. they like to have our fur to make it up Into muffs and capes and fur pieces and hats." "For themselves?" asked Mr. Skunk. "Yes, for themselves," said Mrs. Skunk. "Don't they -admire it on us and say they hope we'll always keep it and that they like to see us looking so handsome?" "No, they don't often say that," Mrs. Skunk answered. "I'm sure if 1 saw a beautiful little girl in a beautiful little dress I would not say : "'Hey, there; give me that dress!' "No, but you would doubtless be frightened at seeing her and then you would lill her dress with the odor you have for a protection and she would have to throw away the dress." "Eut I wouldn't be taking it from her," said Mr. Skunk. "In a way you would," said Mrs. Skunk. "Quite different, quite different," said Mr. Skunk. "Not the same thing at ail." "I really would like to toil the people other things about us, too," said Mrs. Skunk. "What would you like to tell them?" Mr. Skunk answered. "I would like to talk to them about ourselves; tell them our histories." "Do you think they would be interested?" asked Mr. Skunk. "I don't see how they could help but be," said Mrs. Skunk. "I would say: " 'People, this is chapter one. In chapter one we will treat the interesting subject of how a skunk will never kill a big animal. Oh. no; never!

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"They Like to Have Our Fur." We are too gentle! We will never touch big animal meat that mo have killed, for wo will never kill creatures iike that. . "'We eat grasshoppers . and bugs. That: should interest you, people, when you're at a loss to know what to give your families for dinner.' "Then," continued Mrs. Skunk, "I would write a second chapter and in it I would say: "'The daddy skunks will not eat their young. They are too kindly, too kindly.' "In my third and Inst chapter I would say: "And we don't bother about other animals. We're a nice, gentle lot. Ah. yep, think well of the skunks. We're not bad at all.' " "I suppose," said Mr. Skunk, "when they are havinz us for furs they do pay us a certain sort of a compliment." "Of course they do." said Mrs. Skunk, "of course they do." "That's one thimr you should and to your b .!:," said Mr. Skunk. "All. I will j-nt it. In n preface, or a very lit introduction, and I will say. Eeok by Mrs. Skunk. Introduction by Mr. Skm ':.' " "Glorious, glorious." said Mr. Skunk. "Ah. now let us start getting folks acquaiuled with our boot; tlie story of the Skunk family !"

Panama Canal Traffic. According to the report of the governor of the canal zone for a recent month, the number of ocean-going commercial vessels passing through the Panama canal for the month was 101, exclusive of eight United States government ships on which on tolls were levied, other naval ships and launches. Net tonnage of the li'.l commercial ships aggregated dSO.SOT, Panama canal measurement.

flow's Tliis ? "We cf!er J ::-;. W for any case of catarrh that cannot be cured by HALE'S CATARKH MEDICINE. HALL'S CATARRH MEDICINE is taken internally and acts through the Blood on the Mucous Surfaces of the System. Sold t v druErjfists for over forty years. Price Tc. Testimonials free. F. J. Cheney & Co.. Toledo. Ohio.

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Out-of-Door Post Office. St. Petersburg, Fin., boasts the only out-o-doors post office in the United States. It was erected as an experiment by the treasury department for a model to be used for post office buildings in other semi-tropical cities, should this one prove satisfactory. The building was constructed of white .and buff fharble. at a cost of 00.000. Popular Sc ience Monthly.

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To Drive Out Malaria And BuiM t'p The Pjntfiu Take -the OM Standard GROVE'S TASTELESS chill TOXIC. You know what you are taking, as the formula is printed n every label, showing It is QCININK and IRON' in tastplPFE fmm. The Quinine ciriv" out the malaria, the Iron builds up the system. Price COc.

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Heard in a Store. First Shop Girl Geo '! I'd like to have been on the ll-oi when she came across. Second Ditto (who had read the log) They could have used you. all right, Maine, when they wanted that gum chewed to mend the water jacket. Eoston Evening Transcript.

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Cuticura Gosp for the Complexion. Nothing better than Cuticura Soap daily and Ointment now and then as needed to make the complexion clear.

scalp clean and hands soft andwhite. j Add to this the fascinating, fragrant j Cuticura Talcum and you have the Cuticura Toilet Trio. Adv.

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Crumb of Comfort. . ; Miss Sympleson Oh. dear! I found,'

another wrinkle today and I'm afraid I'm growing old. And I do so dread it. Professor Ilarinut Don't worry, miss. Beauty is only skin deep. It's, the mind that counts, and your mind is stijl that of a child of ten.

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Doesn't hurt a bit and Freezona costs only a few cents.

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With your fingers ! You can lift oft any hard corn, soft corn, or corn between the toes, and the hard skin calluses from bottom of feet. A tiny, bottle of "Freezone" costs little at anj- drug store; apply a. fewdrops upon the corn or callus. Instantly it stops hurting, then shortly

you lift that bothersome corn or callus right off, root and all, without one bit j of pain or soreness. Truly! No hum-. bug ! Adv.

Kemembor. girls, that it is easier to elope than it is to get back home again.

Millions of people in fact about 3 out of 10 suffer more or l"!s from indication, acute or chronic. Nonrly every case is casised by Acisl-Siomach. There are othfr stomach rUsorders -which also are pure sogns ot Acid-St tm:eh belchinn:, heaitburii, bloat aJtcr eating, food repeating, pour, gassy stomach. There ar1 many ailinenta which, while they do not cauae much distress la the stomach itself, arc. nvertieie!?. traceable to an acidatomach. Anion? these are nervousness, biliousnesf. cirrhosis of the liver, rheumatism, impoverished blood, weakness, insomnia, melancholia and a long train of physical and mental miseri that keep the victims in miserable h-alth year after year. The riuht thing to do is to attack these n iiir.-Tii -i at their source sect rid of the acidstomach. A wonderful modern remedy called KATONJC now makes it easy to do this. One of hundreds of thousands of grateful Users of K ATONIC writes: "I have been troubled v.ith intestinal indigestion for about nine years and h-ive ppent quite a som for mHiciti". but without relief. Alter usin? K ATOXIC for a few days the rns and pains in my bowels disappeared. EATON IC ia just the remedy I needed." We have thousands of letters telling of these marvelous benents. Try KATONIC and you. too, will be Just as enthusiastic in it.3 praise. Your rtruRBift has E ATONIC. Get a big JOc box from him toilay. He will refanc your money if you are not FatirOd.

SGRiP chew

in PLUG form

Don't Suffer V7ith Piles Ilorton's Eu-ca Ointment, which contains Kucalyptol. Rives Immediate relief from i'-'-aa:.'. infJained, blind, bleeding or protruding riles. It soothes and heals the affected parts, relieves pain, and reduces inflammation. Sold by all druggists, or write to Urdted Phaxmaeal I'Tedueta Co., Knox, Ind., for free tatnjde.

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I i Make your bens la? more ecrgs. Our b.Hjklet i '"I'oiaters cm i'uultry" bIiows how- v-s ini creased production W. Trhling iETt.-ase ia ' feeding costs. Nothing to Pel! but th boedclet. Money back if you fail to get results. I Send oae dollar todiiy for the booklet, I E. L WLNCZR, BOX 1 135. G1XT ELLYM. ILL.

j O G- ivCV. fACiD-cVo: i'vcO 1 w- N u" Indianapolis, No. 3G--1919.

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'TCow that you aro getting nloni in life, I la re s;5j yon are v tlHtig to admit fath'-r in the wotidsTse-.l did you a lot of C.od." "No," nswTel the eld.-.-rly citizen "You see. my fa i her do It ft really be-Ih-ve in corporal pt:n!sh:i-ot;t and tnanj a time wlien I iloorved a lb-king Ik let nie argm h:tn out of doin? hi? Suty."- Birmingham Age-l!orrdd. "

Mrs. Etta Dcrlon, cf Ogdsnscurg, Wis., says: C,I suffered from female troubles which eau?ed piercing pains Like a knife through my back and side. I finally lost all my strength so I had to go to bed. The doctor advised an operation but I would not listen to it. I thought of what i had read about Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound and tried it. The tirst bottle brought great relief and sis bottles have entirely cured me. Ail women who have female trouble of any kind should try Lydia E. Piniiiiam's Vegetable Compound."

How Mrs. Boyd Avoided an Operation.

Canton, Ohio. "I suffered from a female trouble which

caused me much suhering, ana two doctors decided thai I would have to go through an operation before I could get well. " "2Iy mother, who had been helped by Lydia E. Pinkham's Vepetabls Compound, advised me to try it belore submitting to an operation. It relie ved me from 71 my troubles sod can do my house work without any rihr.cnUv. I advise anv woman who is afflicted with X

femals troubles to give Lydia E. Pinkham's Vere- s table Compound a trial and it will do as much r"J-'j tnr tVoT-r. 'r! Xfi-PTT- P.nvn r.th St. ...

IT. E., Cantor" Ohio. ' 7 , 'fj

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