New Richmond Record, Volume 5, Number 30, New Richmond, Montgomery County, 31 January 1901 — Page 3

The New Richmond Record.... Better than .ever. Lately enlarged and special attention given to local news and advertising. If you are not already on our list you are earnestly solicited to Subscribe And aid the paper to please you better still by donating to its need. “It’s money that makes the mare go,” and its takes money to keep the “ponderous” press in motion. Lend to its propelling force by handing us or sending us $1.00 A Year. And be happy in receiving the paper for that length of time.

GIRL FROM SALT LAKE CITY

WHAT SHE CAN DO ----- olomon Sloan's Advice on How to Run the Universe.

Mr. Editor: — If I were boss'.— Women would be treated with as much respect in the East as they are in the West. One of your readers has written to me and wants to know "what she can do.”

Braithwaite’s Friend Received a Welcome That Was Somewhat Startling. “O, you’re Mr. Braithwaile’s friend. I don't know you. but I’ve heard you’re a nice man. Do come In.” It was very good of Bralthwaite to have reported so favorably on me, but the reception was somewhat startling. I hope I looked modest. “I am all alone, you see, and just as busy. Packing up; I’ll never get through. We’re off to Cairo to-morrow. Sit down just there, and you can help. And she tossed me a tangle of wool. I began to see the humor of the situation. I, a correct Englishman, in a small Paris salon au premier was holding a skein of wool, which a handsome American girl, who didn’t seem to consider an introduction necessary, was

Women can generally drive figurative nails straight, and this one hits It right on the head. She says: "I am a good looking woman, who has no father nor brothers, and who has to earn her own living.

“Frequently on the “LT trains and cars I am annoyed almost beyond endurance by the insults of strange men.’’

deftly winding, chatting all the time with a frankness that didn’t give me a chance to say a word. “You do that rather well for a man,” she went on; “goodness knows how I should have fixed it alone. You don’t

"They crowd Into the seat beside me and paw me, as If by accident, or else sit opposite and etare boldly.

“1 put up with it as long as I cau and then leave the car. “I Spent at least a dollar last week in extra fares just for that reason. Please advise me as to what 1 can do.”

look much like an angel dropped in. but that’s not your fault. A little slow. Oh. my friend, if you please. There!" She tucked the ball snugly into a little traveling case, put her hands upon her waist and straightened her back; then looked me in the face in the friendliest manner. I felt it my duty to speak. “Now, Miss Holiday, it you can be ceremonious for just a minute, I’ll in-

LaFayette Importing Co., W. Bent Wilson & A .G. Adams, Proprietor? Importers of Oldenburg German Coach Steliions. Also handle Percherons, draft* large, highly-bred trotting and all breeds of stallions. Winners of first prizes at all fairs where exhibited in 1898: including Indiana, Illinois and Missouri state fairs- Terms easy to responsible parties. Address LaFayette ImportingtCo., I-a Fayette, Indiana.

There is nothing she can do. She might slap her aunoyer in the face, but that would bring most undesirable notoriety.

She might appeal to some other man in the car against the man who was leering at her. The chances are that the second man would try to push an acquaintance on the strength o£ her appeal for help. There is nothing for the lone woman with good looks in an Eastern city to do but to grin and bear it.

troduce myself. Braithwalte was unable to come to-day, so he asked me to make his adieux, to give you this packet, and to say you were to be very

TIME AND SPACE are practically annihilated by the ocean cables and land telegraph systems which now belt the circumference of Old Earth in so many different directions. “Foreign parts” are no longer foreign in the old meaning of the term. Europe, Africa, Asia, are “next door” to us. What happens there to-day we know to-morrow —if we read THE CHICAGO RECORD, whose Special Cable Correspondents are located in every important city in the world outside of the United States. No other American newspaper ever attempted so extensive a service; and it is supplemented by the regular foreign news service of The Associated Press. For accurate intelligence of the stirring events which are shaking the nations —of wars and rumors of wars—of the threatening dissolution of old govern ments and the establishment of new —of the onward sweep of the race in all parts of the world—the one medium of the most satisfactory information is the enterprising, "up-to-daie" American newspaper, THE CHICAGO RECORD.

kind to the messenger, who was his friend.”

In the West if a man is caught insulting a woman the rest of the men thrash him.

“Candy! The lovely man!” said Miss Holiday. “Yes, I've heard a great deal about you. and when we’ve finished packing. I’ll be good and motherly to you. Now. Mr. Haskell from London, you’ll be kind enough to help me with

In the Bast It a woman tells of an insult she is looked on as seeking notoriety.

this trunk.” Miss Nora Holiday was a magnificent girl. ‘‘Alors, mon ami. yon shall put those cotton gloves for which I gave 2 francs next the little packet you're not to look at. Now that traveling pillow and those slippers. These books —and there! I guess the lid won’t close now. Do you mind?" I knelt upon the lid. which, after several attempts, we succeeded in catching. and Miss Holiday arose, with a handsome flush on her face. “There." she said, “it's just too had of me to make you work like that, hut you've been very good, and you shall have some tea and some of Mr. Braithwaite's candy.”

In the West the presumption Is that all women are respectable. In the East the masculine theory seems to be that all women you don’t know are not respectable. Respected fathers of families may be seen any day ogling pretty girls in the cars or eying them in the principal thoroughfares.

If I were boss I would send Eastern men out West to learn to respect respectable women.—Solomon Sloan.

== A Warning ==

By this time I was In no hurry to leave. This young lady from Salt Hake, with her frank, free manners, her intuitive breeding, was like a pine laden breeze, of which one involuntarily breathes deep, and American slang, after all, was no worse than I had been accustomed to hear from Irreproachable Epglish ladies. We sat down on either side of the table to a most successful and dismissive tea. I took my cue from her conversation. and found I might be as unembarrassed as she was. She spoke of Cairo. I didn’t know Cairo. Oh, but I ought to. That, 1 said, probably exclaimed my ignorance. Oh, but I must, she repljed. 1 subjected myself to Kismet; did she Intend to remain in Cairo long? “All the winter, I guess, it the meh will .let me. They’re a terrible lot of men! They think every American girl has heaps of money. They just worry you to death.” I clothed myself In ignorance, and asked in what way?

FREE A large map of tho world on Mercator’s Projection, about SSKxif S - Bj |_> inches in size, beautifully printed in colors, with a large-scale map B , 0 f Europe on the reverse side, will be mailed to any address free of “ charge on receipt of request accompanied by two 2-cent stamps to rover postage end wrapping. The maps illustrate clearly how comprehensively the special cable service of The Chicago Rv.cokT) covers the entire civilized world. Address Tub Chicago Kecobd, IS I Madison street, Chicago.

The Snake—Look here, McFadden. If you don’t quit using my den for a golf-hole, there’ll be a vacancy in your club.

Secret Societies.

THE LEADING INDIANA NEWSPAPER

A horse from a livery stable died soon after it was returned, and the man who hired it was sued for damages, according to Collier’s Weekly. The question turned largely upon the reputation of the defendant ae a hard rider.

A Good Witness.

Henry Clay Lodge, Knights of Pythias No. 288, meets in their hall in the K. of P. Block every Friday, evening. C. C. —Jas. D. Wilson. V. C. —Thos. Kerr. Perlate —Walter Clarkson. K. of R. & S.—O. W. Mason. M. of F.— M. L. Claypool. M. of E.—A. D. Snyder. M. at A.—Jas. Rust. I. G. —Frank Rust. O. G.—Otto Jones. M. of W.—-S. B. Magrudor.

“Oh. they make no secret of It,” she replied, laughing. “They have embarrassed estates, or ’scutcheons that

THE INDIANAPOLIS SENTINEL

need regilding. They want money. They offer you a mine of affection — but they get no affection of mine.” "Then you anticipate being asked shortly to share five centuries of title and a decayed castle somewhere in Poland?” “Oh, no.” Miss Holiday replied. "I always tell them I’m a Mormon, and entail a score of mothers-in-law. Of course, it isn’t true; but they know Pm from Salt Lake, and that, puts them off.” “And will the bearer of a score of quarterihgs be afraid of quartering a score of mothers-in-law?” I asked. "There is no question with mothers-in-law.” Miss Holiday retorted, pausing as she opened Braithwaite’s box of candy, and making a little moue that passed like a ripple round her mouth and was lost in the smile that followed.

The stable boy was called as the first witness.

“How does the defendant usually ride?”

‘Astraddle, sir.”

(Esta Wished 1823)

“No, no.” said the lawyer, “1 mean, does he usually walk, or trot, or gallop?”

“Well,” said the witness, apparently searching in the depths of his memory for facts, “when he rides a walkin’ horse, he walks; when he rides a trottin’ horse, he trots; and when he rides a gallopin’ horse, he gallops; when The lawyer interposed: “I want to know at what pace the defendant usually goes—fast or slow.” “Well.” said the witness, “when his company rides fast., he rides last; and when his compan'f rides slow, lie, rides slow.”

Daily, Sunday and Weekly Editions....-

New Richmond Lodge F. & A. Masons meets Saturday night on or before each Full Moon.

The Indianapolis Sentinel in its several editions, continues to occupy the position it lias so long hold of THE LEADING INDIANA NEWSPAPERS. It is the OLDEST AND MOST WIDELY READ journal published iu the State. ITS rates of subscrption are the LOWEST. The Sentinel is a member of the Associated Press and Its .telegraph column* are the fullest and most comprehensive of any Indiana paper. Its press report* are HUppIomcnted by SPECIAL WASHINGTON DSPATCHKS, covering very fully all matters of Indiana interest, and by reports from its special correspondents at every county seat in Indiana. The market reports of thendianapolis Sou tin %*« complete and accurate. The Sentinel pays special attention to Indiana news and covers the ground fully. Indiana readers will lind more now# of interest to them in The Sentinel than in v ml Chicago, Cincinnati, St. Louis or Louisv ille newspapers. The Sentinel, although l)nmocr;i tic iu l».lilies, publishes nil tne new* fully anil inipartially nnd always treats its political opponent* with fairness. XEBMb OF SUBSCRIPTION :

M.—John McLain. S. W.—E. T. McCrea. J. W. —W. W. Washburn. Treas.—Stow S. Detchon Sec.—J. A. Bailey. S. D.—Jas. Greenburg. J. D.—Thos. Foster. Stewards—Wm. Kite, W. T. Jones. Tyler—Wm. Dewey.

“But the funniest thing,” she continued, “was an old Dutch count,whose estates had been flooded. He wanted to pump them out, or something. Well, he asked Lottie McClellan and Edna Stacey, and they said they weren’t rich enough. Then he came to me, and I had to tell him I'd just started a scheme for transplanting oysters into Salt Lake, and that till the pearl harvest came, I was hard up. That broke him right up. and he told them all at Shephard’s I was mad. Well, after that I swore I'd never let a man propose to me at Cairo again.” “But if one day Cupid came to Cairo?” I asked.

"Now, I want to know, sir,” the lawyer said, drawing a long area n, “how the defendant rides when ho is alone.”

“Well,” said the witness, very slowly, '"when he was alone I warn’t there, so 1 don’t know."

New Richmond Lodge No. 748 I. O. O. F., meets every Wednesday night at their hall on the second floor of the F. M. Perkins business block. N. G.—Herman Litka.

Printed Slip, Too.

If I could sing like Homer d:d Of Helen brave of Troy, Or play the lute like that old beaut. Gay Orpheus, old boy; I’d pitch a tune and whoop ’er up

V. G.—Quinn Kirkpatrick. Sec.—William Vincent. F. Sec.—Ed T. Oppy. Treas.—F. M. Lynn. Warden—J. W. Smith. Conductor—John Cash. I. G.—John C. Oppy. O. G —Cleveland Terrell. R. S. to N. G.—Albert Eshelman. L. S. to N. G. Fred Clough. R. S. to V. G. Richard Thomas. L, S. to V. G. George Schleppy. Chaplin—H. G. Messer. R. S. S.—Ben Dillard. L. S. S.—H. L. Snyder. Trustees— Perry McLain, J. W. Hol lin, J. C. Oppy.

“Then It I were at Cairo, I should be —not at home,” she replied. Now, if Miss Nora Holiday thought she could match me so easily as that

And work with zeal intense To place the thing where it would bring

Not less than thirty cents. I’d mail it to some magazine That boasts its readers keen. And e’er doth prate of its great weight And pages always clean. And then I’d sit me down to wait,

she was mistaken. I had been a bachelor long enough to know my own mind when the time came; and that the time had come I knew as well as it it had been proclaimed to me by special revelation. A whim came into my head. I rose to take my leave, reached my hat and at the door turned. “Miss Holiday,” I said, “do you bet?” “Why, what do you mean. Mr. Haskell?" “This,” I replied. “I will bet you a dozen of gloves against a tete-a-tete supper the next time we meet in Paris that before you’ve been in Cairo a week. Salt Lake or no Salt Lake, some man will have asked you to marry him. I don’t insist on the title or the Dutch submarine estate, but poor he will be. Within a week, mind. Do you take me?” “It’s a bet,” said Miss Holiday, taking my hand. “Then goodby.” "Goodby.” On ray way home I called on Braith-WElit-G. “I’ve come to bid you farewell,” I said. "Farewell?” said Braithwaite, “where the deuce are you going?” "Off to Cairo in the morning,” I replied X

Well satisfied in mind 'Twere safe to bet that I would get “Respectively declined.” —W. M. M„ in Omaha World-Herald

Daily, one your Sunday, one year Weekly, <mc your

*0U» Sk.OQ -.y

WANTED: Active man of good charac ter to deliver and collect in Indiana for old established manufacturing wholesale house. $900a year, sure pay. Honesty more than experience reuqired. Our ref erence, any bank in any city, Enclose self-ad-dressed stamped envelope. Manufactures, Third Floor, 334 Dearborn St., Chicago, Ill.

Particular.

Butcher—Have you any orders, this morrlng, madam?

Young Wife (who is keeping liruset —Yes. that calf's liver you In ought me last week was very tine. I want another one. but be sure and get it from the same calf, as any hu.-banl is very particular.

Ashland Temple Rathbone Sisters No. 160, meet in the K. of P. Hall every Thursday at 2 p. m. P. C.—Jennie Wilson.

M. E. C.—Nannie Lee. E. S.—Anna Meharry. E. J.—Ida Rust. M. of R. and C.—Nina Long. M. of F.—Anna Page.

How They Regard Us Abroad. “Who is that fellow coming across the road?" “Heavens! Here, let’s dodge into this door-way. I wouldn’t have him see us for a farm." "Why not?’’ “Because he's from Cleveland, and he'd bore the life out of us taking census.”—Cleveland Plain Dealer.

Our fee returned If we fail. Any one sending sketch nud description of any invention wilt promptly receive our opinion fiee concerning the patentability of same. " How to Obtain a Patent" sent upon request. Patents seemed through us advertised tor sr.lc at our expense Patents taken out through us receive timiat notice, without charge, in fur, Patknt Recoup an illustrated and widely circulated journuL consulted by Manufacturers and Investors. * Send for sample copy FREE. Address, VICTOR J. EVANS & CO. (Patent Attorneys) Evans Building, Washington, D. C.

P. T.—Martha Bennett. G. of O. T.—Mary Jones,

Tho Record Office For your Job Printing.

OUR JOB PRINTING Department Is better than ever to execute your job work in short order and first-class style and workmanship. Our aim is to please all customers and to meet all honest and fair competition. We have lately added more new type, and we ask that when you have anything, and whatever it is get our prices. Best and neatest work is our first offer alwas.

SALE BILLS Printed on very short notice, on best manilla tag board at reasonable prices—and the publication of a free card of same from date of issue of bills to date of sale. Patronize us.

MOVED The RECORD has lately moved from the McCardle “Old Soldiers’ Home” to new quarters upstairs over Geo. F. Long’s Dry Goods, Jewelry and Wall Paper Store, and where our friends are always welcome. Come and see us in our new quarters! The latchstring hangs out!