Kankakee Valley Post, Volume 11, Number 8, DeMotte, Jasper County, 9 January 1941 — Kathleen Norris Says: [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Kathleen Norris Says:

The Real Problem of Young Marriage (Bell Syndicate—WNU Service.)

He look me downtown to dinner and bought me gardenias, saying that I had let myself get into a housekeeping rut. If hen l said that money teas an important element in married security he just laughed. -' '

By KATHLEEN NORRIS

ALONG about this time of a-Y year the questions begin to come in from the June brides. They are still the happiest girls in all the world and Tim is still the most wonderful man, but still, they’d just like io ask— One particularly bewildered, little bride writes me from a New Mexico city; she says that she cut out an article of mine saying that the money problem was the most important in marriage, and that she did seriously believe it, but that Walter thinks it is perfect nonsense. “Walter,” writes Marian, “has a small salary, but gets an occasional commission. When we had been married only two months we got a really fine commission, and made the first three payments on an adorable house. We got a refrigerator and a gas stove and just a few things we had to have* paying more than half down, but planning to pay the rest off in monthly installments. This, with the .house, means $92 monthly. What we are sure of is $37.50 a week, so you see we need pretty close figuring to get through, months when there is no commission. Walter had a heavy 'cold in October, lost 22 days at the office, so we got behind and he borrowed S3OO to keep abreast of our obligations. Running Into Debt. “Now this is what worries me. He does not like to talk finances with me, and T don’t like to bother him. But by chance I learned that we are running behind with all our payments, and unless we have a streak of great luck—and in the winter real estate developments hardly move at all, I can’t see how we are going to manage. What I want to do is to rent this house for a year, which we could do, move into a small apartment, live on our salary, and let the house pay for itself and its furnishings, whiefi it would just do. “When I hiinted this plan to Walter he was amused and disturbed. He took me downtown to dinner and bought me gardenias, saying that I had let myself get into a housekeeping rut. When I said that money was an important element in married security he just laughed and said that he had been in and out of hot water all his life and certainly was not going to begin worrying now. He admitted that he had made our indebtedness ‘an even five hundred’ but that if the bank ever made any trouble, he could ‘get it from someone.’ He spoke of a ‘second mortgage’ on the house, but while it is unpaid for I don’t think ‘we could do that. Meanwhile he is anxious for a child; both the men in his office have small children and he says he is jealous w'hen he hears them talking of them. But it seems to me we have no right to go ahead with a family, dearly as I would love a baby, until we are a. little more out of the woods. Will you tell me what position I ought td take and whether I am unnecessarily worried? Moss Rose.” , Breakers Lie Ahead. Poor Tittle Moss Rose has a real problem on her hands and certainly there are breakers ahead. She and her Walter will lose their home, and take to smaller quarters, and then

Walter will lose his job. The higherups in an office distrust a man who runs into debt and depends upojn visionary commissions to extricate him, and who at the same time feels himself fitted for the responsibilities of marriage and fatherhood. Through this crisis Rose will have to stand by him, and when the smoke blows away, and he secures a position without the dazzlingl possibilities of* commissions, she will have to persuade him to let her handle their financial affairs. If he agrees and sticks to his bargain, they may emerge into the sunshine of a more secure prosperity again, find a new home, set a room aside in it for the nursery. But if Walter refuses to let his Wife share in the management, the whole thing will be repeated over again, with very doubtful results: For women get tired of bright promises that are never fulfilled; money shortage that is never ended,; eternal humiliations from tradespeople. They know "that these things aren’t necessary, and they would rather work out their problems on a certain SIOO a month, than have a dazzling rush of riches one week, and a bitter shortage for the 51 weeks to follow. Wife's Right to Share Money Planning. It is the right of every wife to share money responsibility, money planhing. If a young husband refuses her that right, he has only himself to blame if she runs into extravagances, cannot account for what he gives her, and blames him for necessary economies. Nothing enrages a husband more than to discover that the little extra money, a bit of luck has brought him, has been blandly spent by his wife, or to open bills for all sorts of ridiculous expenditures that send his scheme for a budget tumbling down into fresh depths of debt. And nothing upsets a wife more than to find herself going about the daily,tasks of beds and dishes thinking resentfully: “he told me I’d have to send Tom’s shoes back and take Mollie out of dancing school, and then he plays poker and loses S6O in one evening! I can’t have a maid even for three days a week, but he can loan Bill Porter a hundred dollars. He gave me a call-down for sending Mama a check for her birthday, and yet he says he matches the boys at the club every day to see who pays for the lunch!” Married love ought to be high above thoughts of money. But it isn’t. Such reflections as these corrode the home atmosphere when apparently far more serious things are forgotten and forgiven. Money in the purse is a singularly healing thing; when Rose can look at a growing bank account with satisfaction, when Walter feels that his wife is as interested as he is in making the financial end of their bargain a success, then both feel a confidence and security that is the very base and root of happiness.